“I’m doing things, but it doesn’t seem to be working! Why?”
If you feel like you’re doing all the exposures but nothing is changing, you may be doing “half exposures” without even knowing it. Let’s look at what full, effective exposures really require.
Exposure is what we do when we intentionally place ourselves into situations that purposefully trigger anxiety, panic, fear and all the things that come with them. We do this in order to learn a new way to relate to anxiety and fear so that we no longer fear it.
Successful and effective exposures require two primary ingredients:
Willingness: You must work to get to the point where you are willing to intentionally do these scary and challenging things consistently to get better. This does not mean you’re happy about doing them consistently, just that you are fully willing.
Acceptance: You must be fully accepting of the fact that doing scary and challenging things will - in fact - be scary and challenging. You must accept that this is the whole point. You must accept that you have to do your best to navigate through the scary and challenging stuff rather than trying to save yourself from it, stop it from happening, or otherwise “side by it sideways”.
The most common issues that result in “I’m doing exposure but it’s not working” involve being only partially willing (inconsistency) and lacking acceptance (trying to find ways to do scary things without being scared).
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For full show notes on this episode:
https://theanxioustruth.com/192
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Music Credit: AfterGlow by Ben Drake (with permission)
https://bendrakemusic.com