Social Confidence: 3-in-1 Guide to Master Assertiveness, Self-Confidence, Personality Development & Social Skills

By Lawrence Finnegan

Social Confidence - 3 Manuscripts in 1 Book, Including: Assertiveness, Conversation Skills and Make People Laugh.

 

1)

ASSERTIVENESS:

7 Easy Steps to Master Assertive Social Confidence, Self-Esteem, Self-Awareness & Social Dynamics.

 

YOU'LL LEARN:

• Boundaries not only keep you healthy

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lawrence Finnegan
• Release date: Jul 6, 2023
• ISBN: 9781088208656

Book preview

Social Confidence

3 Manuscripts in 1 Book, Including: Assertiveness, Conversation Skills and Make People Laugh

Lawrence Finnegan

More by Lawrence Finnegan

Discover all books from the Communication Skills Series by Lawrence Finnegan at:

bit.ly/lawrence-finnegan

Book 1: Body Language

Book 2: Assertiveness

Book 3: Conversation Skills

Book 4: Persuasion

Book 5: Make People Laugh

Book 6: Small Talk

Book 7: Social Skills

Book 8: Email Etiquette

Themed book bundles available at discounted prices:

bit.ly/lawrence-finnegan

Copyright

© Copyright by Lawrence Finnegan. All rights reserved.

This document is geared towards providing exact and reliable information in regard to the topic and issue covered. The publication is sold with the idea that the publisher is not required to render accounting, officially permitted, or otherwise, qualified services. If advice is necessary, legal or professional, a practiced individual in the profession should be ordered.

From a Declaration of Principles which was accepted and approved equally by a Committee of the American Bar Association and a Committee of Publishers and Associations.

In no way is it legal to reproduce, duplicate, or transmit any part of this document in either electronic means or in printed format. Recording of this publication is strictly prohibited and any storage of this document is not allowed unless with written permission from the publisher. All rights reserved.

The information provided herein is stated to be truthful and consistent, in that any liability, in terms of inattention or otherwise, by any usage or abuse of any policies, processes, or directions contained within is the solitary and utter responsibility of the recipient reader. Under no circumstances will any legal responsibility or blame be held against the publisher for any reparation, damages, or monetary loss due to the information herein, either directly or indirectly.

Respective authors own all copyrights not held by the publisher.

The information herein is offered for informational purposes solely, and is universal as so. The presentation of the information is without contract or any type of guaranteed assurance.

The trademarks that are used are without any consent, and the publication of the trademark is without permission or backing by the trademark owner. All trademarks and brands within this book are for clarifying purposes only and are the owned by the owners themselves, not affiliated with this document.

Table of Contents

Social Confidence

More by Lawrence Finnegan

Copyright

Table of Contents

Book 1: Assertiveness

Table of Contents

Book 2: Conversation Skills

Table of Contents

Book 3: Make People Laugh

Table of Contents

More by Lawrence Finnegan

Book 1: Assertiveness

7 Easy Steps to Master Assertive Social Confidence, Self-Esteem, Self-Awareness & Social Dynamics

Lawrence Finnegan

Table of Contents

Social Confidence

More by Lawrence Finnegan

Copyright

Table of Contents

Book 1: Assertiveness

Table of Contents

Introduction

Chapter 1: Step 1 - Healthy Boundaries

Boundaries

Know Core, Know Boundaries

No Core, No Boundaries

Self-Control

Chapter 2: Step 2 - Confidence

Preparing

Eye Contact

Speak Up!

Articulation

Animated

Balance

Chapter 3: Step 3 - Prepare

Research

Rehearse

Audience Knowledge

To Be or Not to Be

Chapter 4: Step 4 - Stay on Task

Emotional Intelligence

Control

Focus

Chapter 5: Step 5 - Active Listening

Me, Myself, and Eye

Body Language

Restate

Empathy

Chapter 6: Step 6 - Validate Others' Feelings

Validating People

Do Not Be Manipulated

Appeal to People’s Better Halves

Do They Have a Point?

Chapter 7: Step 7 - Compromise

Choice, Options and Feedback

Illusion of Choice

Stronger Together

Conclusion

Book 2: Conversation Skills

Table of Contents

Introduction

Chapter 1: Step 1 - Engagement

Be Approachable

Setting

Smile

Empathy

Kindness

Mirroring

Composure

Chapter 2: Step 2 - Active Listening

Eye Contact

Let Them Talk

Body Language

Touch is Touchy

Back and Forth

Summarize

Chapter 3: Step 3 - Small Talk

Opinions

Open-Ended Questions

Processing or Problem-Solving?

Cognitive Bias

Conversation Piece

Interest Groups

Chapter 4: Step 4 - Know Your Audience

Locality

Cold Reads

Analytics and Data

One Of Us!

Monitor Feedback

Chapter 5: Step 5 - Reflecting & Difficult Conversations

Update and Adjust

Nobody Thinks About You the Way You Think About You

Feedback

Self-Reflection

Don’t Overthink It

Difficult Discussions

Chapter 6: Step 6 - Practice Alone

Multimedia

Limits and Dangers

Chapter 7: Step 7 - Educate and Enrich Yourself

Talk!

It’s Not What You Know; It’s Who You Know

Seriously, Just Go Up and Say 'Hi.'

Beyond Books

Conclusion

Book 3: Make People Laugh

Table of Contents

Introduction

Chapter 1: Step 1 - Know Your Audience

Intentional Comedy

Children

Teens

Young Adults & Adults

Middle Age

Seniors

Beyond Age

Chapter 2: Step 2 - Find a Funny Feeling

Research

No, Really, Just Be Funny

Timing Is Everything

No Rules

OK, Maybe One Rule

Common Ground

Why You Can’t Explain a Joke

Last Laugh

Chapter 3: Step 3 - Try It Out

Social Grease

Clubs and Open Mic

Dying

Casual Setting

Improvisation

Chapter 4: Step 4 - Get Used to Word Play

Puns, Jokes and Classic Humor

Punny!

Have a Joke at the Ready

Absurdist and Non-Sequitur

Mimicry, Funny Sounds, and Silence

Timeless or Topical

Set-Up and Punchline

Chapter 5: Step 5 - Explore Physical Humor

Slapstick & Prat Falls

Learn to Fall

Costumes & Looking Funny

Props & The Bag of Tricks

Non-Verbal

Face

Slow Down

Chapter 6: Step 6 - Conversational Humor

Avoid Canned Humor

What’s So Funny?

Surprising Contrasts, Obvious Errors, and Comedic Truth

The Funny One

The Try-Hard

Thought-Emotion-Action

Joy

Chapter 7: Step 7 - Slam!

F*ck Off, Friend!

Love And Hate

Still Basic, Still Unexpected

Hecklers

One In Ten Rule

Pump The Breaks

Conclusion

More by Lawrence Finnegan

Introduction

Welcome to Assertiveness. This guide is for people at all skill levels in this ability, whether you are a shrinking violet who can barely speak up in group settings or a sharp-talking hotshot already in command of social situations. There are tips you have not tried, aspects of interpersonal communication you have not considered, and lessons to learn. Operating under the assumption that you want to learn how to persuade and convince at most or inspire and motivate at least, we break down exactly what it takes to be assertive in the Information Age.

We will go through seven easy exercises you can practice to be more assertive. The career advancement and personal enrichment gained by asserting yourself more is almost beside the point: baseline mental health. Far from being reserved for influential leaders or exploited by arrogant people, assertiveness is necessary for a healthy and balanced personality. Because at the very least, you need a tiny bit to feel safe, confident, and comfortable even in small groups.

Using a little biology and psychology as we go along, I use science and research wherever possible to back up these techniques with facts. You won't have to take my word for anything, nor should you: a large part of asserting yourself efficiently is credibility. Gone are the days we wave our hand at a persuasive individual and say they just have charisma. It is nothing special; no inherent knack someone is born with. We now know precisely what a compelling, influential person does to shine. Our understanding of the human mind and universal social drives allow us to assert our will with force and grace.

Self-esteem, self-worth, and getting anywhere in life demand you assert your will at least a little. Often, the prize goes not to the best or the brightest but to the one who spoke up and stepped forward. Stop letting the extroverted or opinionated lead by default and no more allowing someone with more social confidence to call the shots simply because no one else did. Learn how to lead the conversation without taking all the air out of it.

Master the art of facilitating, not issuing orders, by simple actions and basic behaviors in any group. Defuse hotheads, coax activity from the reticent and, at the very least, make sure you are not ignored. Wolf packs in the wild are led by an equal mated pair, the myth of the Alpha Wolf a construct of narcissism and arrogance. Be the invisible leader, guiding others toward objectives you offered or a radiant beacon, leading the way through example and trust.

There is quite simply no aspect of life not improved by learning how to exert your will in a meaningful and polite manner. So, take a few moments to consider your place in social situations as we take a deep dive into the complex and nuanced world of assertiveness.

Let’s get started!

Chapter 1: Step 1 - Healthy Boundaries

Asserting yourself has one key component that we must consider as we make our way through this project. First and foremost, a firm accounting of our personal boundaries protects against manipulation by others and us accidentally manipulating people. A blanket term for our personal space, belief system and emotional needs, establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries also ensures a solid work/life balance and we are not burning ourselves out. We have to place limits on our give and take, or we wind up exhausted at best or taken advantage of at worst.

Boundaries

Individuals have the obvious physical boundaries, our sense of personal space and how much of that space we want to share with another. We have mental barriers, emotional and intellectual, which we develop to make sure we are not jerked around or manipulated. Sexual desires and varying levels of intimacy help us pair-bond and we draw distinct and important boundaries around our love lives. Many of us have religious or spiritual boundaries, an ethos or philosophy we use to inspire and guide us. If you lack monetary and material boundaries, then you are either independently wealthy or chronically cash strapped. We can place limitations on our time, romantic interests and anything, really, as long we express these limits early and often.

We have the right to assert our needs without feeling bad about it. It should go without saying that this needs to be done in a respectful way. You can ask for the moon as long as you do so with a smile and expectation that it will be refused; you are ready to handle a No with good cheer but still asked! They know your intent. Should the moon become available, they will know you are interested.

Assertiveness and aggression not the same things.

Neither are assertiveness and persuasion. While there is plenty of overlap between asserting yourself and persuading someone else, there is virtually no point where you have to resort to aggression. If putting up or maintaining boundaries if difficult for you, this lesson is one of learning how to stand up for yourself, if less exerting your will. If you have too many walls in place already, this lesson is one in tearing down and letting in. As ever, there is a fine balance to be achieved in maintaining a social equilibrium between going with the flow and sticking to your guns.

In our personal lives, ill-defined or undefended boundaries can look like friends coming over unannounced- if you don’t like that; some people enjoy unexpected guests! It can look like someone over extended and exhausted because they never learned to say No or lazy and unfulfilled because they never learned to say Yes. We can do an awful lot toward ensuring these crucial personal defenses are strong if