Presence: Live without Dependency

By Arjen Broens

Of course, you’ve heard it all before: the nth book on instant happiness, you think.

This book is different: the influence of thought in us is exactly what we will leave behind here.

No entry fee, no occult organization where you have to go through stages to get nowhere, no Mumbai jumbo (as a reviewer of one of my other books said), no stories, no things to buy, no courses to follow, no sacred places to go.

You don’t have to leave your current environment to be happy: right here, where you are now, suffices to begin, start this journey within yourself.

This book will lead you to the right door this time, where you haven’t looked before because everybody else says to look out there.

This one guides you inwardly, right back, into your own heart.

Live life light and effortless.

In presence, right here, without dependency.

Enjoy it.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Arjen Broens
• Release date: Jul 9, 2023
• ISBN: 9798215053928

Arjen Broens

Born in The Netherlands, moved to The Highlands in Scotland on the evening of 11-11-2008, didn't look back. From Edinburgh to Inverness, living in the middle of no where, deer and nature all around.Started to look within to find what was under the false personality which, as a child, I felt, was there to cope with the world of grown ups around me from a very young age.When the 1st 3 years of my life were full on encouragement to laugh, walk, talk, pursue to experience when it all changed into correction, telling me what not to do without telling what I could do from 5 years onwards.I started to see that we all are caught in this merry-go-round, this appearance we hold up and started to write books where, in the past I had my diaries to get me through.Aikido came into my life after a few lessons Jiu-Jitsu to gain confidence where I firmly decided not to want any killing reflexes in this body I left Jiu-Jitsu for Aikido and Iaido which changed my life entirely in a very good way.Books were coming to me at the right time: NLP got me into the right mind set and bumped into it in a second hand book store during a holiday in Ireland for just under a Euro.I chose to invest 30 min each day from then on to change me into who I am: confident, unattached, competent and self assured with life, nature and animals. Pure self and learned from there to listen to my heart with my mind as a worthy advisor to what's going on out there. Thoughts are just options.Started to publish my books in 2013 after both my parents passed away on a very respectable age.Sharing my thoughts and later, my experiences without thought infecting my being, understanding thought and how it is hijacked out there from a very young age and to keep you away from your core inside: the real you you are.Enjoy my experiences in this life, written down for whoever has support by them or fall into your lap as books fell to me without a search, life just happens.Discovered that the real reality is the life support system out there: no books, no gods, no symbols, no religions, no past, no future, just nature as it is is enough, always perfectly on time although our egoic state of mind will disapprove...What Is is now and moving fast into a new now, no time to think as thinking is way to slow to get the real and exact signals, impulses into our senses.Loving what I do, doing what I love: working in construction in the heart of the Highlands, meeting great people on sites and elsewhere.Enjoy life.

Book preview

Presence: Live without Dependency

Arjen Broens

Smashwords Edition

Copyright 2023 Arjen Broens

License Notes

Thank you for downloading this eBook.

This book remains the copyrighted property of the author, and may not be redistributed to others for commercial or non-commercial purposes.

If you enjoyed this book, please encourage others to download their own copy from their favourite authorized retailer or get in touch with the author. Thank you for your support.

In presence, words are obsolete, redundant and actually, mostly in the way like thoughts are mostly in the way, not really adding to the current situation, only busy with the past and the future.

Where presence has a power and not a force, is in the being in line with What Is, in flow, in harmony, silent. Like one of my German fellow colleagues used to say: In der Ruhe liegt die Kraft, in the tranquillity lies the power.

In trying to describe the essence of presence here, the impossibility comes along to do this properly by the requirement of using words to convey this. Words are impossible to pass on what I see (Lao Tzu). Despite this, I will give it a try here, knowing and realizing that it will not suffice.

When someone enters the room or your space around you, you sense the quality of their dependency on others, the characteristic of wanting something from others: attention, acknowledgment or rejection. Despite the power and attitude, they project, you can sense that it is only powerful on a superficial level and does not really have any power in it but just portrayal.

This becomes clearer when conversation starts and verbal and non-verbal communication dictates the field of attention. Directed by subjects and objects as if language and communication is the reference to go by and the only thing important.

It is not: the importance of language and behaviour is created and artificially implemented in our youth, the time we were raised and shaped into what we are now. Shaped by the imitations, limitations and creativity of the environment where we grew up and is just one style within a universe of possibilities but unfortunately, we do not realize this at that time and take that one, sometimes by external force and fear, as our habitual foundation including the story and call it I.

The length and intensity of sticking to this habitual behaviour, this me I perform every day because it suits the situation I am in at that time with these parents and siblings, it gives me a comforting blanket because I know what I get: affirmation, rejection or support in any way for what this I portrayal is receiving.

That role is strongly implemented and engrained as a habit in the 15 to 20 years I am raised within this environment. Every single person is going through this adjustment phase whether you like it or not, some drop out and lead a apparently early life of apparent freedom when they leave home, fed up with the tension of that environment and grow up in a space of friends and so called friends. It is still a habit forming to survive, this I we portray.

Unless you are raised in a team of parents that do not project their expectations and judgments on you as a child, separate their personal internal tensions from you as a person, let you develop your own ways to find out how thinking works in you, how you can use your tools of your brain to benefit your being.

I have come across one young man who has had the advantage of being raised with only his own internal tension to deal with, not that of his parents as well, but he had quite some difficulty to be in a school environment that was a mixture of introvert and extrovert pressure kettles of role-playing class mates and teachers. Aikido and iaido were giving him the confidence to extent his home space to the school and life environment: this is who I am, deal with it or not but my space is mine without judging you or expecting something from you. Presence, full on, rare but great to see.

In the formation of a personality to cope with your current environment which is not really busy with you or interested and supportive in your battle between thoughts and intuition, you are left to your own devices to blend in, adapt to this environment and you form a strong habit of behaviour which expresses this I you are. No manual, guide or mentoring leaves you pretty much unexperienced with the hungry lions out there. That’s why it doesn’t change.

This habit becomes a very strongly believed in