Making change
Every relationship has its own distinctive culture. A tone, an energy, a way of being that, without much thought or focus, seems to be “just how things are”. Perhaps you struggle to show your feelings, or maybe your intimate partnership feels like it’s fallen into a complacent rut. Maybe you’re in a bitchy workplace, or a friendship that feels co-dependent. Just because it’s like that right now doesn’t mean it always has to be. It only takes one person — in the family, or the couple, the workplace or the friendship — to inspire a shift in the patterns and encourage a new way of being.
However, it’s also important to understand and recognise that you can’t change another person. You can’t talk them into changing, you can’t love them into changing, you can’t manipulate them to change, and you can’t tell them they have to. They will only change if they want to. They have to feel a stirring, a genuine impetus. Otherwise their change is a
