A Christian Woman's Approach to Modern Dating

By Dr. Stacy L. M. McDonald

Amazingly, dating is like a lion in the jungle, where every guy likes different things about a woman. This book is a guide for women on the subject of dating and was written to empower women with their God-given spirit relating to dating. This book opens the possibility of being used in a woman's study group. When a man is looking for "the one," they know what they like and want. So to all women reading this, be yourself, love yourself, and see who you are and what you want. A woman should not change for a man. We, as women, have much more freedom in making decisions about dating.

COVID-19 occurred in March. God's whisperings and my own everyday dating experiences led to this literary work. This writing body was a therapeutic writing exercise for me, which metamorphosized into a guide or handbook for others. Yes, it relates to women, but a man could easily read it and understand one woman's point of view. After all, dating is about communication and a two-way exchange. I wish I would have had this to read before dating so that I was more prepared, thinking, and ready to choose the best dating experiences.

Historically, women passed on to their children, male and female, the critical details and traditions of dating through storytelling and wise anecdotes called oral tradition. The writing unfolded by the grace of God, and I am thankful. It is my sincerest hope that this book is a guide for healthy dating, and may it lead each woman into self-introspection so they can experience healthy dating. Be confident, talk to God, and share your wishes, fears, and joys too! Listen to the messages God sends you as a cue, and act according to his will for you because he wants what is best for you. God truly wants you to be happy.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: May 6, 2021
• ISBN: 9781098078881

Book preview

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A Christian Woman's Approach to Modern Dating

Dr. Stacy L. M. McDonald

Copyright © 2020 by Dr. Stacy L. M. McDonald

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, solicit the publisher via the address below.

Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.

832 Park Avenue

Meadville, PA 16335

www.christianfaithpublishing.com

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

a. Women’s Movement

b. Shifts and Changes in a Woman’s Stance

1. Codependency

2. Subordination

3. Submission

c. Parent’s Responsibility to Converse with Children

a. Healthy Relationships—VNP not a VIP

1. Christian Values

2. When to Stay

b. Unhealthy Relationships

1. When to Let Go

2. Finding a Positive Relationship and Gaining Self-Respect

a. Pitfalls and Mistakes Women Make in Relationships

1. Online Dating

2. Casual Sex

3 Acceptance of Yourself

b. Choices

a. Find Supportive Friends

b. Christian Couples as Friends

c. Communicate Clearly

Nothing so enriches an erotic love as the discovery that the Beloved can deeply, truly and spontaneously enter into Friendship with the Friends you already had; to feel that not only are

we two united by erotic love but we three or four or five are all travelers on the same quest,

have all a common vision?

—C. S. Lewis, The Four Loves

Acknowledgments

All information in this book has no real basis for people in real life. Names, characters, businesses, places, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Storytelling is the highest form of passing on valuable information from one generation to the next generation. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

This book is not about feminism, how to be a Christian, or a definitive guide on dating. Rather, this book is informational, eye-opening, and I hope you will take what speaks to you through the word of God and receive the message that was intended for you in this book.

This book is written to empower women with their own God-given spirit relating to dating. This book opens the possibility of being used in a woman’s study group if one sees it fit for their purposes. Anyone using this book must get permission to copy any portion of this book.

While writing this book, Anna Ciccarelli has been like a sister cheering me on! Thank you, Anna! Also, a sincere thank you to Stacie Tchividjian for her honest, compelling, and uplifting contribution through our interview together!

It is my sincerest hope that this book is a guide for healthy dating, and may it lead each woman into self-introspection so they can experience healthy dating. The information in this book is not an end-all or a final answer to any circumstance or situation. This book is a guide to help you, the reader, find your self-love, share it with others, and remain true to yourself.

Enjoy your journey.

Dr. Stacy L. M. McDonald

I.

Brief History of Laws for Women and Courting

Amazingly, dating is like a lion in the jungle, where every guy likes different things about a woman. Women are also looking for a type of man that meets their needs. When a man is looking for the one, they know what they like and want. So, to all women reading this, be yourself, love yourself, and see who you are and what you want. A woman should not change for a man. Nor should a man change for a woman. Instead, a man and woman should meet at their maturity levels and understand how to hang on loosely and maintain living out their lives together while respecting each other’s valuable characteristics and character.

Dating is complicated. On the one hand, as a woman, you want to be there for your man. Your man should want to be there for you as well. But, when a woman is needy, greedy, self-centered in a negative way or has hidden addictions or psychological issues she hasn’t dealt with, it will be challenging for her to date in a mature way all of her wisdom. First and foremost, fall in love with yourself, and get to know who you are and what you stand for. You are a sum of your experiences; therefore, you must understand those experiences, evaluate them, and negotiate within your soul what you want in a relationship, what you have time to invest in, and if you are willing to be right your values.

Take the time to know yourself, love yourself, and let your light shine! A woman who makes a quiet space to pray or meditate (call it what you like) and talk to God, the universe, or a higher power may see her discernment come to life!