When Can a Marriage Be Saved?
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Romantic relationships often show us the deep divide between expectations and reality. For any relationship struggling to overcome conflict, the first step to starting over may be identifying how your vision of marriage is out of step with your partner’s.
In this episode of How to Start Over, we explore why some marriages can withstand conflict, why most couples struggle to validate their partner’s needs, and how to think about when a breakup is in order—by better understanding why the relationship is struggling.
This episode was produced by Rebecca Rashid and is hosted by Olga Khazan. Editing by A.C. Valdez and Claudine Ebeid. Fact-check by Ena Alvarado. Engineering by Matthew Simonson. Special thanks to Adrienne LaFrance, executive editor of The Atlantic.
Be part of How to Start Over. Write to us at howtopodcast@theatlantic.com. To support this podcast, and get unlimited access to all of The Atlantic’s journalism, become a subscriber.
Music by FLYIN (“Being Nostalgic”), Monte Carlo (“Ballpoint”), Mindme (“Anxiety [Instrumental Version]”), Timothy Infinite (“Rapid Years”), Sarah, the Illstrumentalist (“Building Character”), and Gregory David (“Twist One”).
Click here to listen to more full-length episodes in The Atlantic’s How To series.
Olga Khazan: This is How to Start Over. Today, we explore what makes marriage work, why some people struggle to compromise, and how to start over in marriage—whether that means ending your marriage or revamping the one you’re already in.
We’re going to sit down with two people to hear about their marriages, to help answer our burning question—how do you know when it’s time to break up?
Heather Havrilesky is the author of : a memoir about her marriage, newsletter on Substack.
