Dusk

By Kotra Siva Rama Krishna

When he was entering into his 100th year, instead of feeling happy, Sundar felt quite irritated and sorrowful. He requested his granddaughter Rupa not to make any arrangements for the celebration of his birthday. Without bothering with his protestations, Rupa made the arrangements for the celebration of his birthday and made it a success. Sundar felt so much happy when his friend Somaraj a 96 years old man came to his home to stay with him for few days. But the way he was treated by his sons and daughter in laws was always a sorrowful thing not only to Somaraj but to Sundar also. When Sundar could manage to join Somaraj in Nischal Old-age Home which was indeed a happy home for the old people to stay, both Sundar and Somaraj felt so much happier.

'Nischal' the owner and founder of Nishcal Old-age Home, even he was just forty six years aged guy, quite knowledgeable and understandable about old people and their problems.  There are many old people staying in his old age home and all of them were quite happy to stay there because of the facilities that Nischal provided for them in that old age home. They equally enjoy the lectures that Nischal would give in the evenings in that old age home.

'Dusk' is the story of old people, about their thinking, about their psychology, about their problems and in fact it is heart beat of old people.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Kotra Siva Rama Krishna
• Release date: Nov 19, 2022
• ISBN: 9798215832509

Kotra Siva Rama Krishna

The twenty two romantic and suspense thrillers of this author ‘A Mansion Of Illusions (1,17,731 Words)’, ‘A village, a forest and an old mansion (1,13,049 Words)’, ‘Chasing butterflies (1,11,211 Words)’ ‘Across the river...under the bridge (1,02,739 Words)’, ‘Enna (1,03,119 Words)’ ‘Strawberry (1,11,700 Words)’ ‘Amaswitha (1,51,618 Words)’, ‘Sasikala (1,09,423 Words)’ ‘Just Relax! (1,15,793 Words)’, ‘ House of Delusions (1,18,530 Words)’ ‘Half Opened Doors (1,23,600 words)’ ‘Lovenest (50,565 Words)’, ‘Moonshine (51,427 Words)’ ‘Nirupama (51,675 Words)’, ‘Scarecrow (52,226 Words)’ ‘Rose Garden (62, 284 Words)’, ‘Dusk (53,856 Words)’, ‘Rain Flower (53,139 Words)’ ‘rustle In The leaves (3,52,000 words) and ‘Snow Flower’ (2,15,200 words), Wisps Of Smoke (3,20,500 words), Split Personality (3,30,000 words) along with a short stories book ‘Sand Dunes (24,973 Words) and two non-fiction books ‘Body, Mind And You (16,533 Words)’ and ‘English Grammar Simplifier (18,436 Words)’ are available as ebooks and paperbacks only on Amazon websites. The total word count of all these books is more than 29,00,000 (Twenty Nine Lakhs words). The same can be found by searching with author’s name ‘Kotra Siva Rama Krishna.’

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License Notes

This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your enjoyment only, then please return the same and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Disclaimer

The concept, plot, story, characters and everything in this novel are only fiction and emerged only out of the imagination of this author. If anything in this novel even a small part of it resembles, similar or identical to any living or dead or to any literature, anywhere in the world even remotely it is only coincidental and this author has no knowledge whatsoever of it and cannot take any responsibility for the same.

About me

Iam an Indian English writer write mostly fiction books and so far I have written thirty books out of which twenty eight books are romantic, psychological thrillers and the remaining two are non-fiction books, Body, Mind and You and English Grammar Simplifier. The word count of my books range from 15,000 to 3,50,000 and the total word count of all my books is more than 30,00,000 (Thirty Lakhs Words). I have a weakness, I don’t get the feeling that I wrote the book if someone else edits the same, so I am my own editor to all my books. As such there is a pretty chance that you may come across grammatical, verbal mistakes, incongruities and inconsistencies while going through my books, then please pardon me and go ahead. I am always open as much as possible when it comes to sexual narrations in my books as I think sex is very main and natural characteristic not just in human beings but in all other creatures also. So you can find sexual narrations in my books graphical, absolute and complete. My heart-felt thanks to all those who have been purchasing my books all along, encouraging me and supporting me.

Chapter-1

Sundaram slowly opened his eyes when the sun rays touched his face straight through the window. He was about to sit up straight then the point which bothered him till midnight, till he fell into sleep, at once jumped into his mind again. In fact the most unsavourable thing to him has entered into his life! For the last ten years or so he started feeling fear to that. That was his birthday! Why anyone would worry about one’s birthday? Birthday is something that everyone wishes to come to enjoy and celebrate. He also enjoyed his birth days, celebrated his birthdays for a long time. Then he noticed growing age through birthdays and the point that he was becoming aged started giving him uneasiness. Then he stopped celebrating his birthdays. Then he started feeling bad towards birthdays because every birthday making him more and more aged. He was feeling fear to this birthday even from the time it was six months away.

Because it was his hundredth birth day! He was entering into his hundredth year on this day!  How anyone does feel towards his hundredth birthday Sundaram did not know but he was feeling terribly bad. He was becoming hundred years aged man! Very few people can live this long. Was it something to feel so happy? Can anyone feel happy by living hundred years? He had not seen anyone who lived hundred years till then. In his family, relations and friends also, he was the only person who lived hundred years.

No one would feel surprise if he suddenly died now. Moreover everyone would think how he lived this long! In fact Sundaram did not want to live this long. He wanted to die thirty years back when his wife died at her sixtieth year. How much he was attached to his wife! How much he loved his wife! He thought that she was quite unlucky died like that at her sixtieth year itself. Now he was thinking that he was unlucky living this long.

Life had become so bad to Sundaram after his wife’s death. She was suffering from cancer for six months or so by that time. Everything Sundaram did to save his wife was not worked out. Sundaram’s wife Annapurna pleaded with him to let her stay in the home itself in her last days. Therefore, Sundaram took her to home just one month or so before her death. Even it had become so evident to him that his wife would die, he just could not digest her death.

Sundaram was just beside his wife while she was dying. He took her hand into his hands and clutched it strongly thinking he might stop her going away from him in such a way.

Don’t weep and worry for me after my death. Her voice was very feeble and weak.

Ask for anything else except that. Sundaram was struggling himself a lot not to burst into weeping.

My poor husband with her other hand Annapurna touched his cheek and rubbed there. I know how much you are in love with me. How much I mean to you. But.... A terrible cough interrupted her.

Don’t strain yourself. Take rest. Sundaram hurriedly said massaging her chest.

That is what I am going to do once I leave this body. She said with a smile after controlling herself.

Don’t talk like that. You are not going to die. Sundaram said even he was not at all feeling confident about that.

How you can stop me from dying? she smiled feebly. You pretty well know it is not possible. Accept the truth. Be prepared to part with me forever my husband. Be prepared to the inevitability.

I pleaded with you and begged you to stay in the hospital. But you did not listen to me. If that treatment continued you sure would live a very long time. Sundaram was feeling very angry now. If his wife became not adamant like that he would not have preferred to take her home at all. She not at all agreed to stay in the hospital and took the treatment so he had to take her home.

You too very well know that there is no use of that treatment. She said.

He hissed out heavily. He just did not know what to say.

She entered into his life when he was just seventeen years aged. She was aged just thirteen years or so then. Child marriages were so common in those days. From such a young age, for such a long time, they both were together. She was going away from him and it appeared she was not very much worrying about that.

You are not worrying at all to leave me alone like this, all to myself. He choked while talking.

You are not alone. You have sons, daughters, grandsons and grand.... She tried to say something more.

No. Never. He nodded his head vigorously in negation. Without you I am just alone. No one can be equal to you to me. No one can fill the gap you are making in my life.

She took his hand upto her mouth and kissed on that. But what can I do? I don’t want to die. I don’t want to leave you all alone. She closed her eyes and tears started flowing down from her cheeks. But it is the decision of the god. We have to obey it.

He did not know why, he was not intended to, but he suddenly burst into weeping. He never has wept like that. He never thought that he could weep in such a way.

Oh, please don’t weep like that. His wife hurriedly said. You are making me feel more worse by weeping like this.

Slowly and slowly he controlled himself and said. I too come with you. I cannot manage myself without you.

Please, please don’t say like that. With the same feeble voice she started pleading with him. There are our children, grand children and all they need you.

None of them need me. They can manage themselves without me also.

Please...please... for my sake. You have to stay alive. You have to be with them. You love me a lot. Cannot you do that for me? the pleading look in her eyes was really moved him then.

Yes, I stay alive for them. I do be with them. Suffering the pain you left for me, I shall be with them, don’t worry. Breathing deeply and hissed out heavily, Sundaram said.  But will you do a simple thing for me? he asked her.

What is it? her voice was very weak.

Rupa, your granddaughter, Charan, her husband want to talk to you a lot. You are very much angry with them as they married against your wish. Even Charan not belongs to our caste.... He tried to say something more.

But suddenly there was a spark for a moment in her eyes and she started breathing with gasps. Her hand around his hand started becoming tight.

What, what is happening? he yelled out but he understood what was happening at that time.

I am leaving now. Excuse me .... That I am ....leaving you ....like this..... 

Those were the last words from her he heard. Her mouth remained opened but there were no words from it. Her eyes were still staring at him but there was no light in them. There was no expression in her face.

He could understand what happened. He further could understand that what was before him at that time was not different from the bed, fridge and other articles in that room. But he could not understand what really went away from that body.

He remained staring at the body. His mind grasped what happened but momentarily there was no grief in him. There were no tears in him and there was no wife for him from then on who looked after his welfare so good for a long time.

Sundaram... he sensed a hand on his shoulder and that voice was his friend Somaraj’s. You have to understand. It is better for her like this rather than suffering anymore.

Sundaram did not say anything but his wife’s hand was still in his hands. He just did not know when other people also entered into that room.

If you come away from that place, there is a lot need to be done. Please try to understand. Somaraj said again.

Even in that deep distress also, Sundaram understood that and stood up.

Oh, grandpa. Happy birthday to you.

Sundaram suddenly came into this world when his grandchildren, Saket and Mounika, rushed into that room yelling out loud.

Happy birthday.

They fall on him heavily and it was not new to him. It was always a happy experience to him to spend time like that with his grandchildren.

How you are feeling after you have entered into your hundredth year, grandpa? his granddaughter Mounika asked him.

Sundaram grimaced. From then on, it seemed, everyone in some way or other would remind him that he entered into his hundredth year.

Of course, happy Sundaram immediately lied. How much he liked to remain at sixty or seventy rather than entering into his hundredth year like this.

It is very rare that people can live upto hundred years, is it is not so grandpa? Mounika asked him again.

You shut up. There are people who lived more than hundred and ten years also. His another grand grandson Saket said.

You are also going to live that long grandpa? Mounika asked him.

Sundaram’s heart once again cringed on hearing that. I did not expect to live even this long. How do I can say whether I live more than one hundred ten or not? Sundaram forced a smile onto his lips.

You sure do live that long grandpa, once you reached this far I am confident that you live that long. Mounika said.

We cannot say it for sure like that. Even after crossing one hundred, all people cannot make it upto one hundred ten. There are people who died at one not two or one not three. Saket said. 

I wish so much that it happens like that. Sundaram hissed out heavily. When these baby devils were going to leave him in peace?

What you both are doing here? Vexing your grandpa with silly questions? his granddaughter Rupa came there.

Happy birthday grandpa, very very happy birthday. Taking his hand into hers and squeezing it gently, Rupa said.

Please don’t say many returns of it. Sundaram could not contain his irritation.

Why don’t grandpa? We all want you to live long and long. You are an intelligent and a great support to all of us. She sat beside him and put her hand around his shoulders.

Do you feel in the same way if I am not an intelligent and not a support to all of you people? looking straight into her eyes Sundaram asked her.

Something is upsetting you grandpa. She kissed on his cheek and hugged him. In whichever way you may be, I always want you to live, live and live. If you are not here whom I call as grandpa? In whichever way you may feel, I always want you to live long, long and long.

Its alright dear. Sundaram too kissed on her forehead.

We are all planning a big party in the evening on the occasion of your birthday. Got herself off from the bed, Rupa said but she still kept her hand around his shoulders.

Please don’t do anything like that. Is it is necessary that everyone know I entered into my hundredth year? I feel quite uncomfortable and you too know about that. This news made Sundaram even more upset and irritated.

Grandpa, don’t forget that I am a psychologist. I know that you are feeling awkward entering into your hundredth year. There is no necessity to feel like that and in fact you have to feel proud and happy that you lived this long. Only disciplined people can live like this.

Sundaram did not say anything but there was still that troubling expression on his face.

You must come out of that guilty feeling dad. Otherwise life would become even harder to you from now on. For some time I have been observing you and understood what you are feeling. It is a must that you have to come out of those feelings. Taking her hand off from his neck and settling herself more comfortably in the opposite chair, Rupa said.

I did a mistake allowing you to study psychology. Sundaram said.

Rupa laughed out on hearing that. I cannot do anything for that now. But I can see that there shall be no problem to my grandpa and he shall be happy all the time. It is my responsibility.

All the time Saket and Mounika observed them both silently.

After his granddaughter Rupa and her children went out from that room, Sundaram fell back on the bed again. Sundaram has three sons and one daughter. His youngest son Mukund and his wife Pallavi died in an accident and their daughter Rupa was only three years or so old by then. From then on, Sundaram and his wife looked after her as if she was their daughter. His first son Ranjan was a doctor and second son Bimal was an engineer. Sundaram’s daughter Mamatha was a scientist. Except, Rupa’s father Mukund, all his children were studied and settled at the expense and hard work of Sundaram. But Mukund was very clever and intelligent he studied hard and got a government job also. But it has happened like that in his life.

Sundaram did not feel as much awkward as he thought in his birthday celebration. Rupa has taken special care that at no time situation would become uncomfortable to Sundaram. When his birthday celebration was over, Sundaram also felt good.