231 Things to Say to Killa Conversation: I Have a Little List, #4

By David Macpherson

Here is a list that can be quite important to you. 

 

There are certain things you can say that will end a conversation. Some are simple like, "The house is on fire." Others are more individualized, such as, "The back of your head has turned purple, which is a sign you are a space lizard!" Both get the job done, the conversation is over. 

 

Sometimes you're the person saying such things, so this book will be handy to get out of talking to that dude you can't stand. Then there are other occasions when these things are said to you. You will no doubt end the conversation, but it's nice to know that a line was used on you. And knowing is half the battle. 

 

I Have a Little List is a series of occasional electronic zines that attempt to look at how a list can be used.  

• Language: English
• Publisher: David Macpherson
• Release date: Oct 30, 2022
• ISBN: 9798215369005

Book preview

231 Things to Say to Kill a Conversation

1. No drinks for me, because my twin brother is embedded inside my liver and he doesn’t like to be tipsy before he goes on a killing spree.

2. Hey, do you remember when we were in college, and I had sex with your girlfriend?

3. This reminds me of the ending of the novel I’m working on.

4. Did I leave the milk on the counter back home? Well, I can’t fix it now. What were you saying?

5. I have a memory of when I was in the womb. It was very comfy back then. Your apartment reminds me of it.

6. Want to hear me do all the dialogue to Monty Python and the Holy Grail?

7. Your sister is quite good looking.

8. I make cupcakes that look like naked mole rats.

9. When I lived in Los Angeles, I used to hang out with Billy Idol. But you know, that was LA for you.

10. I used to have mind reading abilities. But I lost it when I got my vaccine shots for school.

11. Are you looking down my shirt?

12. The reason our country is such a mess is because of all those communists.

13. You don’t understand what woke means. Let me explain it for you and you will see you are wrong and want to apologize to me and all the other people you might have offended.

14. A friend told me to invest in Apple when