Coffee Table Comedy or Coaster Fodder

By Norman Willey

This Coffee Table Book is like no other.
It is meant for adults with a lot of adult humor.
This is a must have comedy book written by an up and coming
comic who loves to have fun.
Written by a disabled man to help stave off depression.
The Author of this book is always thinking of hilarious situations and comical amusement.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu.com
• Release date: Nov 30, 2013
• ISBN: 9781304671486

Book preview

Coffee Table Comedy or Coaster Fodder

You Don’t Know Me Yet…But You Will

H

ello,

My name is Norman Willey, You don’t know me yet…but you will.

I am disabled with brain injury on my frontal lobe and side lobes. I shake a lot like Michael J.

I keep comedy close to help me through the hard times. It’s funny that I want to be a comedian but suffer from depression. I can’t stand for too long so I will be your sit down comedian for this evening.

I have written this book to help sustain some income and to help finance my Science Fiction novel which I am writing now. Please help finance my dream of at least one major book in the market.

I consider myself an author and put pen to parchment to be read by all, or only a few.

I’m not prejudice; I think everyone is an asshole or bitch.

I’ve written this book to entertain for a short time.

I’m an author with a few books listed at ebookit.com and lulu.com…

I am working on my Sci-fi book now, and I have written this book to help raise the funds needed to finish my masterpiece Sci-Fi novel which will be a big hit.

So please help me by purchasing this book, or e-book, and have a few laughs while you contribute to my book fund.

This book is meant for adults 18 and over. There is a lot of bad language and jokes making fun of all nationalities of people.

I am a Caucasian male married to a Hispanic woman.

My brother is married to a beautiful Asian woman and they have two children. My sister adopted a Pacific Island daughter and my second brother adopted an African American son.

My family is a mix of colors and I may have content that plays with Nationality’s.

I was christened a Lutheran, baptized a Christian and Baptist; and a Pentecostal. I have also attended Catholic mass.

I may have content which plays on religious beliefs.

I think that everyone is an idiot including me.

My friend used to say All men are assholes and all women are bitches.

I say Men can be bitches and women can be assholes. I have come to the conclusion that all people are idiot assholes and bitches. I see it every day, including myself.

I hope I have cleared up any possible bias about what I write.

I mean to write just for fun in this book for your coffee table.

This is a book that you can pick up for a chuckle or two; maybe a laugh to brighten your day.

Remember: The square root of I don’t know; is nothing.

Welcome to My World

C

ome on in if you must. There are no dirty deeds or mistrust.

Come on in and enjoy your stay, come on in and we will bust.

I can be a king or double as a queen.

I have brushed my teeth once or twice, and they must be very clean.

Come inside my mind and explore. There’s a lot in store in my maze of tight corners and lower archways.

Come inside my mind, but be sure to watch your step.

It is a muddled world, you journey, where there are no excuses and no apologies are made.

Inside you will find a roller coaster ride of foul language and excuse my pride; I’m not your fucking maid.

Welcome to my world as crazy as may be.

I make fun of everyone; especially me!!

Disclaimer:

T

here will be cursing and farting so, if your offended by such material then leave or hold onto yourself, uh shut the hell up and deal with it.

No part of this information shall be duplicated, copied or rebroadcast without the express permission and cash to Norman Willey as this shit is protected by copyright and the Smith and Wesson .45 which is lying on top of this original document in the top drawer under the, under garments to the left of the old ladies brazier next to the window under the lamp over by the closet next to where we place our dirty garments. Thank you and have a great day.

I started writing a diary but every day it was the same old shit

1. Get up (that’s always first)

2. Eat breakfast

3. Drank coffee

4. Took a shit

5. Took a shower

6. Went to fucking work.

7. Came the fuck home

8. Watched fucking TV.

9. Went to fucking bed.