Summary of Terri Cole's Boundary Boss

By IRB Media

Please note: This is a companion version & not the original book.

Book Preview: #1 Wherever you are in your life, you have choices. You can choose to ask for or allow others to help you with things, or you can choose to overextend yourself to keep the good graces of others.

#2 Boundary issues are extremely common, and they typically come from bad boundaries. Bad boundaries are exhausting. They create dramas that suck our time and energy. To stop these distractions, we have to go back to our earliest influences and examine how those influences led to these unhealthy boundaries.

#3 In my family, it was clear that my parents had an unspoken agreement about how each would operate: my father was the breadwinner, and my mother was the nurturer and family manager. I learned to avoid conflict and anger by reading people and scanning situations.

#4 I grew up in a household where my four sisters and I acted out our repressed anger by door slamming, shit talking, and occasionally fighting. I learned to bury my true feelings and adapt them into more allowable ones.

• Language: English
• Publisher: IRB Media
• Release date: Mar 7, 2022
• ISBN: 9781669356554

IRB Media

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Book preview

Insights on Terri Cole's Boundary Boss

Contents

Insights from Chapter 1

Insights from Chapter 2

Insights from Chapter 1

#1

Wherever you are in your life, you have choices. You can choose to ask for or allow others to help you with things, or you can choose to overextend yourself to keep the good graces of others.

#2

Boundary issues are extremely common, and they typically come from bad boundaries. Bad boundaries are exhausting. They create dramas that suck our time and energy. To stop these distractions, we have to go back to our earliest influences and examine how those influences led to these unhealthy boundaries.

#3

In my family, it was clear that my parents had an unspoken agreement about how each would operate: my father was the breadwinner, and my mother was the nurturer and family manager. I learned to avoid conflict and anger by reading people and scanning situations.

#4

I grew up in a household where my four sisters and I acted out our repressed anger by door slamming, shit talking, and occasionally fighting. I learned to bury my true feelings and adapt them into more allowable ones.

#5

In adulthood, I became a master of indirect communication, using sarcasm, eye-rolling, and the occasional hostile lie. I also became skilled at covert manipulation, meaning those I was manipulating never realized I had my own secret agenda operating behind my it’s-all-good facade.

#6

I began to examine how I related to myself, and I realized that I had never had a healthy internal boundary before. I had always been able to listen to my needs, but not to others’. I realized that to create healthy boundaries in any other relationship, I needed to be a master of my internal boundaries and my relationship with myself.

#7

As you