Why Do We Kill Our Women and Why Are We So Bitter?

By Marshall Makhubo

This anthology will help you to understand why many people stay in abusive love relationships, while others run away from such relationships. We live in a time where people are being killed by their partners, which is very heart-breaking. Love has to be kind and harmless. This book will help those who are in toxic, abusive love relationships as it offers great advice on how to deal with these relationships. At the end of the day it is your choice as to which advice you take. If you know a friend who is being abused emotionally or physically, or both, you may gift the friend with this book and help protect them from any harm. The anthology contains the views and opinions of people who have been abused, and of people who have had siblings murdered by their partners. The book also contains the author’s personal views and opinions on abuse. We as people have to help each other, because if we do not help each other, then the cruelty in the world will continue. THE AIM IS TO STOP GENDER VIOLENCE!

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About the Author

Marshall Makhubo grew up in Orlando East, Soweto. He is a loving person who values friends and family. His passion lies in writing and thus far he has written four continuations of the novel “Love Lies Beautiful and Ugly”. See his Instagram or Facebook page using #LoveLiesBeautifulandUgly for updates. He wrote “Why do we kill our women and why are we so bitter?” on the 18th of August 2019, after receiving news that a woman had been killed by her partner. Gender violence has become commonplace, but on the 18th he decided to say: ENOUGH!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Marshall Makhubo
• Release date: Feb 25, 2020
• ISBN: 9780463595015

Marshall Makhubo

Romance, Sci-fi and Non-fiction Author??Poet ?Creative writing ✍️ is life ?Playwright and song writer ??Marshall Makhubo is married to Zandile Phungwayo-Makhubo, Marshall Makhubo is an author of a novel titled “Love Lies Beautiful and Ugly” and an anthology about gendered violence titled “Why do we kill our women and why are we so bitter?”Marshall Makhubo is a loving and caring person, he has a book he has written with his wife titled “I love f***king my wife.”Marshall Makhubo is a director of a company named “Marshall Makhubo Novels” a company which specializes in identifying young talent and help the youth with publishing their books.It does not end there for Marshall Makhubo, he is also a director of an NGO called “Wathint’ Abafazi Wathint’ Isiwe” Marshall Makhubo wishes to open shelter for women and children who are victims of abuse.Gender-based violence is impacting us worldwide and we have to fight for our people. #EnoughIsEnough #Kwanele #GBV

Book preview

Why Do We Kill Our Women

and Why Are We So Bitter?

Marshall Makhubo

Copyright © 2020 Marshall Makhubo

Published by Marshall Makhubo Publishing at Smashwords

First edition 2020

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or any information storage or retrieval system without permission from the copyright holder.

The Author has made every effort to trace and acknowledge sources/resources/individuals. In the event that any images/information have been incorrectly attributed or credited, the Author will be pleased to rectify these omissions at the earliest opportunity.

Published by Marshall Makhubo using Reach Publishers’ services,

P O Box 1384, Wandsbeck, South Africa, 3631

Edited by Vanessa Finaughty for Reach Publishers

Cover designed by Reach Publishers

Website: www.reachpublishers.org

E-mail: [e-mail]

Marshall Makhubo

[e-mail]

I would like to thank every person who took the initiative to share his or her opinions and experiences on gender violence. I believe your words and views might have a great impact on someone.

It is healthy to talk about your feelings. Never be ashamed to admit you are being abused; it is not something to be ashamed of.

Our parents failed us and their parents failed them. Abuse and gender violence might come from the way we were raised. Our parents disciplined us in the most brutal ways. My father has more than once beaten up my siblings until they bled. They were even beaten up for silly mistakes. My mother used to tell me stories that she was beaten up with a sjambok that is used on donkeys. I even feel sorry for animals that are beaten with a sjambok. They were not disciplined, but tortured. Their parents abused them physically and they thought it was right for us to be punished in such a way. Most parents will not admit to abusing their children, because it is said your parents cannot abuse you. What an excuse! My siblings respect me, because I never lay a hand on them. When they do something mischievous, I reprimand them and give them all possible reasons to make them understand why I believe what they are doing is wrong. It is said, Communication is important for a reason.

Dear parents, you reprimand a child and, if they do not listen, find ways to punish them without being physical. Being physical will make the child believe it is right to be violent. It explains why most men are violent, because their parents taught them to be violent. It explains why women stay in abusive relationships; it is because they believe when they do something wrong, they need to be disciplined in a physical manner, as their parents did when they were raised.

To every person who says I love him/her, or I cannot leave him/her when he/she abuses you… I find those words very absurd. Love goes along with happiness and the fact that he/she abuses you tells me that you are unhappy, which makes you fear that person, not love that person as you claim. If it happens once, those strong feelings will still be there and it might be hard to leave that person. I agree it is hard to forget about a person you are fond of; however, put your safety first.

It personally hurts me the way our children, sisters and mothers are being killed. The rate of women being killed by their partners is increasing and it is insane. I could not sit back and do nothing, because one day it will happen to someone I am close to. It is a huge concern to me. Where do you get the guts to literally beat a person to death? Is it insecurities? We cannot live in a world in which women are killed and do nothing about it. I love the old era or Western traditions in which boys were taught to protect women at all times. In fact, our parents groomed us to be shields of women. What happened to that? Are we blinded by modern days?

I have interviewed women and men on women abuse and some of these people have been victims. I asked them twelve questions, which were hard to answer. The majority of people I interviewed were caught up in emotions and some of them cried when answering the questions. I will share the perspectives of both women and men.

I hope this little book will help someone who is in an abusive relationship. I hope a friend will help a friend and gift a friend by giving this book to someone who is in an abusive relationship, but does not know which step to take. I hope this book will spare a life. I hope this book will help people, especially men, to deal with emotions and help them not to feel entitled.

Table of Contents

Answered by... Women

Why do you think men kill women?

Back in the day, men were shields of women. Do you feel protected or think men are still shields?

Have you ever been in a situation where you were aggressively handled or strangled by a man or been hurt in a physical manner?

Do you think men talk about their feelings?

Have you ever been pushed to the limit that you felt like stabbing your boyfriend?

If your partner lays a hand on you, do you think it is a sign to leave the love relationship?

Why do you think it is hard to be a woman in this society?

How many relationships have you ever been in where you were abused either emotionally or physically?

How do you feel about women who are killed in South Africa?

How many women have you seen being abused in public and men did nothing but minded their own business?

Do you know someone who is being abused or was abused? What are you doing about it or what did you do about it?

What can we do to reduce child abuse, women abuse and women violence?

Answered by... Men

Why do you think men kill women?

Back in the day, men were shields of women. Do you still think men are seen as shields or guardians?

Have you ever been in a situation where you were aggressively handled or strangled by a woman or been hurt in a physical manner?

Do you think men talk about their feelings?

Have you ever been pushed to the limit that you felt like stabbing your love partner?

If your partner lays a hand on you, do you think it is a sign to leave the love relationship?

Why do you think it is hard to be a woman in this society?

How many relationships have you ever been in where you were being abused either emotionally or physically? How many partners