Heal Yourself - Part I: Heal Your Mental, Physical, Emotional & Spiritual Grids

By Kiran Groodoyal

The author of the highly acclaimed Healing Express Oracle Book Your Guide To Self Healing, brings you Heal YourSELF - Part 1; a self-help guide designed to provide answers into the art of self healing. It deals with how to heal the several layers of the Self, directly impacting the others, the world and the universe on a grander scale. This book delves further into the methods of healing the self through a series of exercises, programs using visualisations, meditations, affirmations and other forms of healing methods. It is a valuable tool for those looking for self healing and empowerment.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris UK
• Release date: Jan 14, 2013
• ISBN: 9781479773947

Kiran Groodoyal

Kiran Groodoyal is an artist, writer and photographer. Academically, she has attained postgraduate education in Law, Politics, International Relations and Globalisation. Additionally, she has acquired a Postgraduate Degree in Teaching and now is a Lecturer and Director in her own educational establishment. A legal advisor for a number of years, she now lectures in the legal field. Kiran is a certified Reiki Master/Teacher/Healer in many modalities. She has written several books and published her debut self help title in 2012. She is passionate about many issues, ranging from Human Rights, Environmentalism to Self Empowerment and Self Healing.

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Heal YourSELF - 

Part I

HEAL YOUR MENTAL, PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL & SPIRITUAL GRIDS

From the Healing Express Series

Kiran Groodoyal

Copyright © 2013 by Kiran Groodoyal.

ISBN:

Softcover  978-1-4797-7393-0

Ebook       978-1-4797-7394-7

The right of Kiran Groodoyal to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted by her in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

All rights to this book are reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, transmitted by any mechanical, photographic or electronic process, or in the form of photographic recording; nor may be stored in a retrieval system, transmitted, or otherwise be copied for public or private use, other than for fair use as brief quotations embodied in articles and reviews—without prior permission of the author.

The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual wellbeing. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, the author, publisher assumes no responsibility for your actions.

To order additional copies of this book, contact:

Xlibris Corporation

0-800-644-6988

www.xlibrispublishing.co.uk

[e-mail]

304235

Contents

Preface

Introduction

Chapter 1    SELF Love

Chapter 2    Self FORGIVENESS

Chapter 3    Releasing Guilt and Shame Towards Self

Chapter 4    Unhappiness

Chapter 5    Love Heals Fear

Chapter 6    Love and Compassion

Chapter 7    The Separated Self

Chapter 8    Inner peace—Acceptance of self—Individuality

Chapter 9    Honouring the Body, Mind and Spirit

Chapter 10   Let Go—Surrender

Chapter 11   Laugh, play, rediscover the inner child

Chapter 12   Clutter Free

Chapter 13   Love the personal Beauty—Individuality.

Chapter 14   Patience

Chapter 15   Detachment

Chapter 16   Live In The Now

Chapter 17   An inventory of life

Also by Kiran Groodoyal

Healing Express Oracle Book—Your Guide To Self Healing

Published June 2012

For my whole family, my husband and my muse.

You all inspire me deeply.

Preface

When life breaks you down, you have two choices, to give up or to accept the challenge that has been presented.

The reason for writing this book is very personal to me. Life broke me into pieces, but it also healed me completely. In between these two transitions, I healed and was reborn.

It was a very tough road; my toughest so far, this road was filled with immense fears of: life, of living, of failure, of death, the past, the present, the future, of the unknown, of being unsuccessful, of being lost, of not knowing where I was heading, of surrendering, of letting go, of being patient, of forgiveness for the self and others, but ultimately, it was a fear of my own self and my inner power. Mine was fear of fear; I wanted to block my inner power at all cost. I asked the question that most people ask when going through really tough time, why me?—but at the end, this question was turned into why not me? from victim, I became powerful, from the darkness, I found light, failures became a stepping stone for success. I turned my life around and the truth is everyone can.

The aim of this book is to help others who are going through similar paths and facing tough life lessons, along the way. This book is Part 1 which starts with healing the SELF.

Introduction

"Half the healing is done, when you realise

that you can heal yourself."

From the author of the Healing Express Series comes the book Heal YourSELF which is divided into 2 Parts. Part 1 of Heal YourSELF—is about the SELF, it lays out methods of healing the self. Each chapter comes with an exercise at the end of the chapter which is essential for the healing to take place. Part 2 of Heal YourSELF is healing the self through healing others and the world, which will be coming out soon. As a result of healing the self, others and the world, the universe responds in kind. This is a how to; a self help book. I have been a reiki master/healer/teacher for over 10 years and a great believer of healing the self, through the art of self healing. If we set our mind to it, we can heal anything. Belief is the driving force and when we believe, the answers come miraculously. This book is my second book after the debut, highly acclaimed self help Oracle Book—Healing Express Oracle Book—Your Guide To Self Healing published in 2012 from the Healing Express Series.

This book was born when I was looking for answers on how to heal myself. I realised that many people want to heal themselves, but they don’t know how to go about it. I was looking for such a book myself, when I was going through my toughest of lessons, but couldn’t find one which could take me through the healing stages, step by step. So, I decided to write this book. I hope it finds you well and if it’s in your hands, then there is a reason for it. The innermost adventures are about to begin. To health and wellbeing. To life. To miracles.

Much Love,

Kiran

www.kirang.co.uk

www.healingexpress.co.uk

Chapter 1

SELF LOVE

No one will love you, until you love yourself.

The first lesson: after being lost for such a long time, it was time to find the self. Once I found myself, it was time to learn how to love the self. I also realised that this was the number one reason for us to have come to this earth, the quicker we learn and master it, the better it is for our personal and spiritual growth and our soul development. Why do we need to love ourselves we may ask? Isn’t it enough to love others and live life that way? Although part of our life purpose is to love others, the most important and difficult part is to love the self. It is a harder lesson to master, because not many of us know how to love the self. We have to go back to the roots of who we are, what we are. Are we what we do? Are we who we are because of others? What is loving the self? How to do we start? Where do we start? The most important question you may have to ask yourself is why do we need to love the self? after that, you then may want to find out what is the meaning of loving the self?

We have always been told or taught that loving the self is ego-centric, it’s a bad thing. We are told that loving the self is synonymous to selfishness. We are never even taught to love the self in a pure non self-centered way. We have never learnt how to deal with the self. Schools and universities teach how to follow others, they teach us to regurgitate information, but no one actually ever teach us the most important lessons: self love, respect the self, others, this world, have high morals, be humble and many other tools that actually one needs to live in this world. We learn a lot by observing our parents and elderly. We also learn from our society, schools, universities, mass media, social conditions, our upbringing, from friends and from our own mistakes.

We are taught a lot of things, we gather learning tools from others and life itself, people are constantly teaching us whether we realise it or not, we are always picking up things either consciously or unconsciously. But despite all the lessons and tool-gathering, no one actually teach us to love the self. No one from all the hundreds or thousands of people we meet during our lifetime tells us that loving ourselves is the master of all lessons. Only a very few people know this and practice self love. Some may frown upon hearing the term self love. Some may see it as a bad thing; others yet may view it as airy fairy and disregard this very important lesson. To understand self love, we first have to define it. Defining it can be tricky because loving one-self can be as simple and clear a concept as the day or as complicated and dark as the night.

Defining Self Love

There is a difference between loving ourselves and being egocentric to the point of being full of oneself, arrogant, looking down on others and loving the self in an unconditional, pure way. We must first find out what loving one-self means and how we can achieve it in this life. We may even want to ask what loving one-self has to do with anything. As the reason may seem incompatible at first glance; the answer is that, to be able to love others, the world and the universe, we must learn to love ourselves in in the purest, divine sense of love that comes straight from a pure place, from the divine centre of our being. We must love ourselves unconditionally, no matter what we have or haven’t done; we place no judgment, no hard feelings, and no ego filled arguments about how we feel about ourselves. Remember that we already are a big success, we have learnt a lot of lessons about our life path, either if we realise it or not, we have achieved a lot already. The trouble with us is that we weigh ourselves based on ego-filled values. It is always the ego which is ruling us, from the word go, we grow up competing with ourselves, with the neighbours, children at school, college, university, the system, then we grow up and we compete with the world to get the ‘perfect’ job, usually equating perfect with the best paid, high collared, the bigger the company, the better, the more the money we’re paid, the more successful we are. The ego leads us to places where we can fulfill our cravings for money and material things. We want the job everyone wants, the lifestyle, the car, the house, the beautiful partner, the travels around the world, we want to do everything everyone else wants. There is nothing wrong with wanting to do everything in life, with wanting to grab the world with both hands. Although, we need to understand the underlying reasons behind our wanting, our desires, do we want to achieve things for ourselves? Or for others, because we feel the need to be the best, to show off? to compete with others? To prove that we are good at everything we do, to have a name in society, to impress others? Why do we do what we do? Does it make us happy? Is it something we always wanted to do, our declared childhood’s dream? Is it aligned with our talents and gifts? Was it our dream to begin with or did we end up following the dreams of our parents along the way? Perhaps because we seek their approval in everything we do. All these won’t make us happy; self love leads to happiness and vice versa. Fulfilling other peoples’ dreams or identifying ourselves with their dreams will not make us happy. We should trust our hearts to guide us and do things that we were born to do, or wanted to do. Do what we love doing, follow our talents and gifts that have ultimately been given to us to fulfill ourselves as individuals and to share our success with others. Although in this materialistic world, more and more people keep running alongside the tracks of material success. It’s all about money and the things it can buy. But is this collective gold rush making people happy? Can money buy happiness? The signs are that people are becoming stressed, unhappy, detached, lost, anxious, more and more fearful and the more we pursue this false dream, deep inside we know is not ours and the more we run the risk to miss out on our real purpose in life.

To achieve self love, we have to shed all the layers that are futile, it is difficult to find out what layers aren’t serving us at first but as we get more loving towards ourselves we get all the answers. Life is for living, it is for living with as much love and happiness as possible. We cannot lead our lives by just merely surviving. We should aim to achieve a wholesome life, only then we can feel happy, fulfilled, and peaceful and find our place in this world. Until we don’t achieve that peaceful spot in the world, we are always going to feel uprooted, detached and unhappy wherever we go.

Once we learn how to love ourselves and fill our life with love and compassion we will feel a deep underlying happiness. Life will be filled with peace and joy that we have come here on earth to gather. Let’s begin by being happy, let’s choose to live our lives fully. We all know that happiness doesn’t come from having all the material things in this world, but all the things that we haven’t had time to develop and make time for. Material things can’t bring happiness on its own, but it adds to our happiness. It’s not a bad thing in itself, but it’s the intention towards it that defines our lives. We need to slow down or come to a complete halt at times to live our lives fully. The more we run after happiness, the more it eludes us; it can be a clever illusion if we do not know how to approach it. For many, it can remain an illusion for life. When we relax and open ourselves to happiness it just comes to us, we find it. It is up to us to notice happiness, because it is everywhere, if we know where to look. Otherwise it can be a lifetime of searching and still not finding it. And later find out that happiness had always been there, staring at us all along, it is just a matter of wanting and being prepared to see it. When I slowed down and made an effort, I found it. I only found it when I stopped looking for it, it came to me effortlessly. Looking back now, it is clear that happiness was always there, I just couldn’t see it. It was my perception of things which had to change in order for me to see it.

Happiness can be found in the most unlikely places. It is the first step towards achieving self love. Self love and happiness are interlinked, and we cannot find happiness until we can love the self. Furthermore, we cannot achieve happiness until we clear our lives from all the excesses, all the things we do not need anymore.

Happiness is free and unconditional if we notice it. All the great things in life are free and we don’t have to spend a penny or cent for it. In fact we have no excuse to say that we can’t afford it. We can all afford happiness. Although it comes at a very high price. All we need is the willingness to change ourselves and work on all our layers, because we are made of layers just like an onion. We need to find each layer, then work on each of them, especially those ones we have been ignoring, as working on each separate layer brings us closer to the self. Discovering the layers and curing them doesn’t come easy; we have to work hard at it. We have to commit the self to the hard work and dedication.

As mentioned before, to be able to heal ourselves, we have to heal our lives. To be able to love the self, we need to make the first steps towards self healing. Without the love for oneself, nothing can be achieved. Healing comes from being able to first understand the self and being willing to make the necessary changes within oneself.

Since self love comes from deeply loving the self, that love resides deep within our core. If the heart is happy, then it will be able to love and be compassionate towards not only the self, but also others and everything else that inhabits this world, including this world as well.

So, the first step is to know oneself properly, then, we can work towards love the self without any judgment or criticism. We must love and be loving towards the self and others too. This can be a very big task especially when self love is the issue. The self is always present whether we like it or not. It is in fact easier to love the self than it is not to. We need to find out what makes us tick, what makes us happy, what makes us sad, emotional, angry and what makes us smile. We are all unique and special and we must never try to compare the self with anyone else, because there isn’t anyone like us anywhere else on this planet. We are each unique individuals. Each one of us, we are one, we are one with the creator, we are who we are and there is no one like us on this earth or anywhere else. We need never try to change the self to be someone else, because we will get lost and become very unhappy. Once we have known our own self, the real us, we will be on a very happy path. We humans have strong emotions that makes us who we are, human, those feelings need to be channeled in the right direction otherwise it can be harmful or even destructive for our growth and even to others.

Since we are all unique; we should never copy others, as that is only going to banish the real us from life. We won’t exist; we are merely going to be a copy; a clone of someone else. There are reasons why we are on this earth to be who we are, if we then become unhappy about who we are, because we are different from the supermodels, the celebrities and copy everything they do and say, then we fail our purpose of being here on this earth because we are not being ourselves. Wanting to be like others means that we don’t like who we are and that is a waste, because if we keep on doing what others do then we keep denying ourselves, our true self. We have all come to this earth with unique attributes, personalities, characters, talents and gifts. We have come here to teach others about them, to enlighten and to make a difference. We might not realise all the teachings we are doing by just being ourselves, we might not like who we are but by just being ourselves, people are enlightened, we give others permission to be their real self, it teaches others to be themselves; that they can be powerful too by being who they truly are.

When we try to copy and mimic others we block our inner gifts, our own great qualities and attributes that we have come here to share and teach others about. Furthermore, we block our own qualities from coming out and developing. This can never lead to happiness. We can never be happy in our skin, because we are fighting with ourselves constantly. Our existence, our own identity cannot carry on if we are fighting with our own self, it means we do not like the self. That sends out a negative message to those around us, the world and the universe. We can never be happy by denying ourselves and our own existence, our identity and unique qualities. If the universe wanted to make us all alike with similar qualities, looks and characters to everyone else, imagine how boring this world would be. We would all be exactly the same, cloned and behaving like each other. However, we were made different with gifts, talents, looks, attributes, personalities and unique characters for a reason; so that we can all teach each other new things and learn from each other. We are different and diverse in our existence; we have brought our talents and gifts into this world to share. If we look at nature, there are different types, forms, shapes and colours, in animals, trees, flowers and everything surrounding us. The same applies to us; we must learn to be happy with being who we really are. We can live all our lives pretending, but it’s only going to teach us the same lesson over and over again, to be ourselves and love who we are enough to give the SELF a chance on this diverse and unique earth, which is just like ourselves, unique in all its ways.

Loving Number ONE

This is about sincerely loving yourself. Loving number one is the most important thing that we could do in our life, not with the ego filled number one, but with the purely loveable number one. The ultimate aim is finding, accepting and healing the self. Once we have found the self, accepted it, only then we can begin to heal it. Only then, it becomes easier to love the self. Only then we can be proud of who we are. Regardless of the way we look. No one was ever made ‘ugly’: this term is widely used and even accepted. People laugh at others and label them with names, ugly, fat, skinny. It seems anything different is frowned upon. I never understood why anyone would be so cruel to call anyone ugly. It is a behavior triggered by fear of the different; it comes from a place of lack of understanding and separation. Everyone is beautiful. Some may not see it. We are all different, no one is ugly! We are all beautiful in our own unique ways. Everyone was made different. We look at others and have this urge to classify people, to place them into categories: ‘gorgeous’, ‘wonderful’, ‘beautiful’, ‘ugly’ or ‘perfect’. In reality, no one is ugly or more beautiful than others. We are all the same; we are all beautiful, perfect in the purest sense of the word. We have become obsessed with looks, beauty and perfection, we have built this concept of perfection based on ego filled values and standards.

We base our image of beauty on the media’s definition. Society has bought into those standards without questioning those who make these claims. Can anyone say what perfection really is? Can perfection really be defined? Who is to say that anyone on this earth has to be of a certain weight, height, colour, complexion, in order to be perfect?

When materialistic tendencies get out of hand we start to live a life which is totally superficial, we start buying to feel that momentary high. Afterwards, when the hype is over, we feel down again. To feel that hype again we buy even more to feel happy again, and before we know it we are caught in a vicious cycle of ephemeral happiness. That is a constant circle of buying in the hope that we can find happiness. When the feeling wears out, we have the need to go out and buy again and again, this can carry on all our lives until we realise that money does not in itself make us happy. In essence, what makes us happy is the feeling of being complete, being loving and of being loved by others. These are the essential criteria of happiness. These changes can only take place by making the first step towards our own self, accepting the self as a unique, special being with exceptional talents and gifts.

Often, when dealing with the self, the real issue is that we cannot accept and love who we are, what we are and the way we are. These feelings can trigger all the insecurities that shove us further into a downward spiral. When we do not love the self, others will read that subconsciously and the patterns will repeat from the outside world as well. Usually, when we have self-doubt and low self esteem, we project that like a radar on an energetic level. People around us pick it up psychically; without them knowing that they are reading us, they too will feel the same as we do. If we have contempt for the self, others will have it for us too. Since we are all tuning in at the same time, picking up, sending and sharing information, as we all are constantly reading each other all the time. We are the mirrors of everyone we meet and interact with. When we meet people it is because we need to learn from them and teach them. We are each others’ teacher and learners as we play both roles at the same time. When we function as a mirror to someone, we can experience very strong feelings, as we absorb the other person’s energy, especially if we have been having that triggering feeling for a long time. It becomes imprinted in our energetic field permanently, until we actually clear that energy away. It is easy to absorb energy from others, this energy is stored in our energetic field. That is the reason why, when someone feels low, we may feel low too. When we feel low in self confidence, self belief and have self doubt and even self hate, people around us can pick up on that feeling as it becomes their feelings too. We attract people with the same issues as ours and they become glued to us through our energetic fields. That is why many times bullies are attracted to those who have self esteem issues. In essence, people feeling they are victims, expose themselves to abusers, like bullies are attracted to those who are weak. Where there is a lack, another energy will come to fill it. This is the law of attraction. We have called for those people as our energy matches theirs. We are polar opposites, that is the reason they come to us in the first place, both parties have a need and by coming together, each party get what they want. We do not know it is happening because we do not do it consciously, it all happens on a subconscious level. This is an effect of a lack of self love. Once we find the lack, all the bullies, perpetrators fall away, because we do not match their energies anymore.

As we learn to love ourselves, people begin to love us, and when we hate ourselves people hate us too. That is because we have attracted them through our fears, anger, worries and hate for ourselves. Our thoughts are extremely powerful, it is a tool for manifestation, and whatever we think of can be manifested just by thinking and injecting feelings into it. When we feel hate, anger and worries, we project a lot of strong feelings into it, as a result of these very strong feelings, a similar reality manifests very quickly.

The only way to break this pattern, is by confronting the deep underlying feelings that we have been blocking inside ourselves. At first we may feel as if the problem is too big to deal with, but the acknowledgment of its existence is of primary importance towards healing. As soon as we have allowed the self to deal with the truth, we may feel so overwhelmed by the immensity of the problem and the dilemma of not knowing where to begin. However, we have to make commitment to heal the self, to heal that issue, to allow the self to be free from the burden that we have been carrying all our lives. There may be a big release of energy at first, this may come out as strong painful feelings, a strong desire and need to cry, this is a positive sign, it means the body, mind and soul is healing and is ready to make that transition into the new cleansed energy.

Most times, it isn’t going to be easy, nevertheless this stage of release is important for the healing to begin, after putting in the work, we will feel liberated from the heavy burdens we have been dragging around all our lives. Once we have conquered the truth, we free ourselves, whereas when we live with lies about who we really are, what we really want, we remain slaves. Accepting ourselves, who we really are, with our strengths and weaknesses can bring us freedom. The cleansing brings us closer to our own self. It helps us know who we really are. We should all find our true self. It may not be an easy process, as we are all conditioned from when we were very little. We grow up with serious conditioning and brain-washing. Everyone tells us what to do, what not to do, schools teach us to follow, no one actually makes creators but followers. To actually be a leader in this world means to be able to think differently from everyone else. To stand apart from everyone else, to pick something we truly believe in and go and run with it. Make a difference, no matter how small, because that is still something more than before. Something is better than nothing at all; no matter how small or big the contribution. It is essential to do things differently, to be able to stand up alone and not get scared by adversity, even if we stand alone.

Well then, why do we do certain things? Why do we do what we do? Why are we scared of change? Why do we believe that buying things will make us happy? Does it make us happy? When we are compelled to do things, not because we want to, but because we believe it will make us happy; we cannot truly feel the happiness, but only for a very short time. The reason is that, we are being controlled to do certain things. The media tells us to buy, buy and buy more. We are told to consume, every single company is trying to get our money. They glamourise buying and tell us that buying things will make us feel happy. Clever psychological games are played so that we really believe that we actually need all the things that are being advertised. Logos, brands, messages and company mottos are all designed to tell us that we need the product they are selling. Clever digital manipulation of images force us to think that there is something wrong with us if we do not use certain products, or we do not look a certain way. Usually an image is digitally manipulated to look perfect and to make us believe that if we use these products we can look a certain way too. Insecurity through conditioning is instilled in the masses; this insecurity can only be taken away by consuming more and more in the hope that everyone will look a certain way. Once we have achieved that look then we feel good because we are then conforming, we are part of the group’s dynamics. We are not different; we are fitting in, this way we are accepted by the majority.

If we buy to feel good