One of Each, Sabrina Ruiz, Surgeon

By Peggy Buxton

Much is happening in Northwood since the interview about BIID aired on the Isabel Hardy Show. Isabel and Leeanna are adjusting to life following their amputations, and people are asking questions. A sponsor drops the show. The subjects of the interview consider moving there. Missing an arm after the accident, Joan considers losing a leg. She is not alone in the desire to have one of each.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Peggy Buxton
• Release date: Dec 4, 2014
• ISBN: 9781310514883

Peggy Buxton

Author, wife, lover, and amputee. I have been missing my left leg for years. Growing up I felt that it should not be there, and it is has been a blessing to have it gone. Today's term for this condition is BIID and in the past simply referred to as being a 'wannabe'. I am a full-time crutch user. Like my husband, I find amputees fascinating. 'Devotee' is the frequently used term. My stories have characters that mirror my life in some manner - wanted/needed to be an amputee or want to live with an amputee. I make no apology for my descriptions of these people and there is no intent to take away from the suffering of some amputees. I love feedback on the stories, but I cannot promise to reply.

Book preview

One of Each

Sabrina Ruiz, Surgeon

Peggy Buxton

Copyright 2014 by Peggy Buxton

Smashwords Edition

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Chapter 1 - Joan Visits

Betsy Lloyd sat on the patio sipping a beer. The day was hot, and she loved a beer on days like this one. Other days, she preferred a glass of whiskey, bourbon more than scotch, though either would do. One barefoot rested against the edge of a second chair, the heel rocking up and back. The other foot was missing; in fact, much of the left leg had been amputated nearly a year before. Nearly forty, she looked half her age, with a very lovely body, and wearing a one-piece thong, as she was, she looked especially nice.

Want another? Betsy said to Joan Gilbert, a casual friend, younger by nearly ten years, and a former patient at the urgent care clinic where Betsy was a doctor.

Nah, this is enough. Joan scratched the end of her stump. She had been in a car wreck six months before requiring amputation of the right arm just above midway to the shoulder. It had happened while traveling in Mexico, and she returned home a few days after surgery, then met Betsy when she needed the sutures removed. It was her good fortune that the driver was wealthy, and had been generous when he learned of the result.

How’s the arm?

Joan rubbed the end of the stump a few times, something Betsy enjoyed watching. She moved her foot enough to touch Joan’s, and played around. Joan played along, enjoying the company.

My writing still looks like I am in kindergarten. She laughed. It was a shock to lose the arm, but I’m long over that.

You look good.

Joan smiled, intertwined toes, and rocked Betsy’s foot side to side. Yesterday, I was downtown, and an older guy tried to pick me up. She chuckled. He admitted his interest was in my missing arm.

A devotee. Betsy laughed. When I don’t wear my leg, I get followed sometimes. I was led to believe there were millions of devotees, but I don’t catch many people obviously interested. Most of the ones I do are harmless, and can even be nice people.

I still find it curious that you wanted your amputation. I know I’d never thought much about what it might be like to lose a limb, and now that I have, well, I guess it isn’t all that bad.

Would you consider having that as an elective procedure now that you do know?

She chuckled. As I said, it isn’t so bad, and I’m used to the way I look now.

Any dates since?

I love wearing short sleeve blouses and tank tops. I felt very bold the first time. She chuckled. A few stared, but I was very self-conscious and felt I was under a giant spotlight.

I was that way my first time at a public swimming pool.

Betsy sucked long on the bottle, swallowed, and burped twice. God; that felt good. Why do guys get to belch and women don’t? She laughed. I bet not everyone that goes to see Dr. Ruiz has BIID, not that it matters to me.

BIID affected people the way gender identity did, only it made people feel they should have a disability, most often missing limbs. Dr. Ruiz was a surgeon in Mumbai India, and one of the few anywhere in the world that performed amputations to help relieve the suffering.

How about you?

Betsy rested her hand over her stump. I told Mack I did, but I didn’t really, at least for the reasons he had his amputation. I just love stumps. I almost became a surgeon so I could do amputations.

Mack was Betsy’s husband, and because he had BIID, had also traveled to see Dr. Ruiz to have his right leg amputated.

"Is it common to just want an amputation?"

Maybe not, but I’m happy I did what I did. I usually wear my leg to work, but the days I don’t, no one seems to mind.

Do people ever have more amputations?

Betsy took another sip. That is one issue most with BIID don’t have, unrestrained amputations and revisions. Sure, some BIID sufferers wish to have progressive amputations...a leg now, an arm later, maybe more of the leg next. I’m not talking about that. It’s the people that are now beginning to have them for cosmetic reasons, like starting with a small tattoo and ending with them over the whole body.

Since you did not have it, do you fear that you might have more amputations?

I just do not know. Recently, I removed the sutures from Isabel Hardy’s arm stump...left, below the elbow. While holding it, I felt an intense need of have one of my own. Where that came from, I just don’t understand. Sometimes in bed with Mack at night, his stump feels so good...maybe it is the empty space, anyway, it makes me think about my remaining leg.

Did you feel that way about my stump?

Uh-huh. Betsy grinned.

How much would someone have amputated? Joan said.

A Jamaican lady had one leg amputated and is now a torso...all four limbs completely missing. The last three were all at the same time.

Is she married? That seems quite extreme.

Inez was living with a devotee of torsos. She and Krista were both torsos. Lee was very wealthy and could afford caregivers. Recently, Inez moved back to Northwood and is living with another guy, also a devotee of women like her.

Wow, really?

Uh-huh.

So, what if I became a torso, would there be men that would want me?

Raul, the guy that Inez is with now, is rumored to keep a list of wealthy men waiting to find a torso.

And they would not be interested if I only lost three limbs?

Nope...four or no deal...and all of the limbs at that.

Makes me feel...I don’t know, like I have an abundance of limbs. Joan laughed.

I met Inez once, and that was pretty intense. She sucked on the bottle. I can see myself like that...kind of scary to know it would be okay.

What would you do?

Not much. Betsy laughed. I don’t know. I just don’t know. She sighed and then drank more beer. I could still practice medicine without legs.

How would Mack feel about you losing more?

When I mention someone like Inez, he seems to freeze up. Maybe he understands that I might be drawn in that direction. What would that be like to be cuddled up to a torso? Betsy sucked hard on the bottle. When I close my eyes and think about it, I don’t know if I’d rather be the torso, or holding one.

What is Isabel Hardy like?

She was nice. We had a brief chat while I removed the sutures from her stump. Betsy pointed below her elbow. "I told her that Mack and I were both missing the opposite legs. She found that interesting. That blonde reporter is hounding her. Maybe the blonde has repressed some fantasy about being an amputee herself. Closeted devotees are like that, and maybe wannabes as well. I find it very satisfying using that term...’wannabe’ instead of BIID, whatever. Of course, there is no wanting associated with it."

Joan drank the last of her beer. I’ve been lusting over an Oriental lady missing all of an arm and leg.

The black and white pictures of her in a one-piece thong? I’d kill to have her body. Of course, I don’t know how I’d walk around with the stumps on the same side. I heard rumors that Isabel’s producer is like that now.

Holy, mother.... Really? Joan covered her mouth.

"She is married, and the rumor continues that