Interview, Sabrina Ruiz, Surgeon

By Peggy Buxton

Isabel Hardy has a syndicated radio program - The Isabel Hardy Show - where she interviews people of topical interest. Her producer, Leeanna Jansen, books a young lady, nineteen years old, and a recent amputee, believing it will be inspirational. Laurie is asked about the cause of the amputation. She blurts out that she had BIID, and found a surgeon to amputate the leg.

Listeners and Advertisers are outraged and the podcast of the show is pulled from the website. Citizens of Northwood where the show is broadcast, and both Isabel and Leeanna live, are divided. Many accept that this illness is little different from what affects transgendered people and that the amputation is just a treatment. Others believe it is wrong to amputate healthy limbs.

Isabel realizes that her feelings about her arm mirror the ones discussed during the interview. When she returns missing an arm, a TV reporter camps out in front of her home demanding to know why the amputation. A few citizens tell the reporter to leave Isabel alone.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Peggy Buxton
• Release date: Nov 2, 2014
• ISBN: 9781311458940

Peggy Buxton

Author, wife, lover, and amputee. I have been missing my left leg for years. Growing up I felt that it should not be there, and it is has been a blessing to have it gone. Today's term for this condition is BIID and in the past simply referred to as being a 'wannabe'. I am a full-time crutch user. Like my husband, I find amputees fascinating. 'Devotee' is the frequently used term. My stories have characters that mirror my life in some manner - wanted/needed to be an amputee or want to live with an amputee. I make no apology for my descriptions of these people and there is no intent to take away from the suffering of some amputees. I love feedback on the stories, but I cannot promise to reply.

Book preview

Interview

Sabrina Ruiz, Surgeon

Peggy Buxton

Copyright 2014 by Peggy Buxton

Smashwords Edition

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Chapter 1 - Radio Show

Isabel Hardy sat across the desk from Laurie Goodman and her mother Alma. The clock ticked down, and the red light turned on.

This is the Isabel Hardy Show, and today we have as our guest Laurie, an amazing nineteen-year old young lady. She paused and glanced at Laurie, then Alma, then back. Laurie’s leg was amputated almost a year ago just after her eighteenth birthday. Now, she walks using a pair of crutches. Isabel took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. Laurie is wearing short tight pants, and a tee shirt, and looks like many girls her age, only the pants leg on the left side has no thigh extending from it because there is no thigh anymore. The pants leg has been tailored to hug the profile of what remains of the hip.

Silence filled the room, everyone seeming to hold their breath.

Laurie, how did you feel when you were told about the amputation? Isabel must have not read the admonition trial attorneys are taught about never asking a question you do not already know the answer. It must have been quite a shock.

Laurie and her mother had discussed how to answer this question. They knew it would be first because it was the most obvious one to begin with. In fact, they had discussed it for the whole week since Isabel’s producer proposed doing the interview. Alma offered that Laurie should say whatever she was comfortable having the world know.

Actually, it was a huge relief.

How so?

Most of my life I knew, someday my leg would be amputated.

I don’t understand. Isabel knew she might be treading into a minefield, and the interview was live. How had you known? There was no way to stop now.

Have you ever spoken with a transgendered person...you know they feel trapped in the body of the wrong gender? Laurie paused, looking squarely into Isabel’s eyes, watching her nod a few times. That is how I felt about my leg. Maybe it wasn’t always that way. Maybe I didn’t realize exactly what I was experiencing, but when I reached puberty I knew as clearly as I see you, what it was about.

Let me understand. What are you saying about your leg...that it should not be there?

Correct.

How did you know?

I would look at myself in the mirror and see that I had both legs, but the left one seemed to be extraneous. Imagine if you woke one morning and had three legs, what would you do?

Three legs...It would make difficult putting pants on. Isabel laughed uncomfortably.

Let’s say you just put a dress on, then what would you want to do?

I guess I’d probably try to hide the extra leg until I could find some way to have it removed. Are you saying that’s how you felt?

Yes, ma’am. At first, I felt that I might be a little crazy, but after a few days I pretending to have one leg by folding my left leg and putting it in my jeans so part of the pants leg was empty...dangling free and empty. It was then I felt a tremendous sense of relief. Laurie sighed. I used Google and found a reference to something known as BIID. A researcher had interviewed over fifty people that felt exactly as I did. He was a psychiatrist as a major university here in the states and had published the findings of that interview. He later published additional papers on the subject.

So, you could be cured by seeing a psychiatrist or therapist? That must have been a relief.

Actually, there is no cure for BIID, other than surgery.

Oh...my...God, Isabel gasped, realizing the difficult situation developing. The producer on the opposite side of the window was hurriedly dragging a finger across her throat.

No, we have to continue, Laurie said. Maybe this isn’t exactly how you originally expected this to unfold, but the story is just as important, maybe more so, more than one of a teen that has lost a leg from cancer or trauma or illness.

Alma sat up straight so her face was in the proper position to speak into the microphone.

Laurie’s mother, Alma has just joined us. How did Laurie explain this to you?

"Pretty much the way she just did to you. She showed me the research, and comments from others with BIID. She said this is how I feel. We talked for the rest of the night, and by morning I understood how she could sense the leg was alien and unwanted."

How did it make you feel to know Laurie was in such anguish, with no options for a cure?

Alma took a deep breath, and slowly let it out. I was surprised how similar I felt.

You? Isabel gasped.

All my life since my teen years, but I had suppressed the feelings the whole time. That was the first time I had a name and a diagnosis that made any sense to me. I had never spoken with anyone about how I felt when I saw a female amputee missing a leg. I was a wreck for hours or even days. Seeing one missing an arm was interesting, but never caused the same feelings.

Does this run in a family? Is it common for a mother and daughter to have BIID?

I don’t think anyone has tried to find out if it runs in a family or what triggers the initial realization that a limb should not be there.

Oh-h...my...God-d, Isabel drawled. Laurie had the amputation, do you plan to have one?

Alma rapped knuckles against her thigh. A hard knock could be heard throughout the room. Isabel suddenly understood what caused the sound, and gasped.

How come you have a prosthesis and Laurie does not?

I have some of my thigh, and a successful fitting was possible.

Isabel looked at Laurie. Why did you choose to have the whole leg amputated?

"I did not choose, but that is how my form of BIID dedicated the kind of amputation. You see, some will perceive the left leg should be completely missing, others the right leg below the knee, or maybe an arm. Often, the person sees an exact amount of the leg remaining, and if the amputation is above or below that place, the BIID might continue."

So you believe your leg should be completely missing and your mother believed she should have a short piece remain?

Exactly.

Do some see themselves missing multiple limbs?

Yes, though a single leg above the knee is believed to be the most common. Some need both legs amputated, or maybe one of each, or more than just two.

More than two-o? Isabel sighed.

"None of this is a choice, but an effort to bring the body image into line with the one viewed by the individual. Some of it is almost cosmetic, the way a woman might have a breast enlargement or change the color of their hair."

How can you equate amputation with breast implants?

Have you ever known anyone that had them? Was it a casual decision?

My girlfriend’s weren’t, she whispered.

Isabel! the producer gasped, letting Isabel hear in her headphones.

Isabel waited until the redness of the blush faded. But it is a healthy limb.

Not to me! Laurie paused. Sorry. She