By The Sea

By Peggy Buxton

Kevin Barker had the worst luck with women. Things changed when he met Linda while at the university. She was missing all of one arm. He and Linda were together for years, then the breakup. Now thirty, his romantic fortunes changed when a triple amputee standing in front of his building needed to use the bathroom. He did not understand just how much that would change his entire life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Peggy Buxton
• Release date: Jan 7, 2016
• ISBN: 9781311974525

Peggy Buxton

Author, wife, lover, and amputee. I have been missing my left leg for years. Growing up I felt that it should not be there, and it is has been a blessing to have it gone. Today's term for this condition is BIID and in the past simply referred to as being a 'wannabe'. I am a full-time crutch user. Like my husband, I find amputees fascinating. 'Devotee' is the frequently used term. My stories have characters that mirror my life in some manner - wanted/needed to be an amputee or want to live with an amputee. I make no apology for my descriptions of these people and there is no intent to take away from the suffering of some amputees. I love feedback on the stories, but I cannot promise to reply.

Book preview

By The Sea

Peggy Buxton

Copyright 2016 by Peggy Buxton

Smashwords Edition

* * *

Chapter 1 - Stranger on the Street

It was early evening, and the street on the edge of downtown Morristown was deserted as I parked in front of the building where I lived in a condominium loft. I was tired. My thirtieth birthday was last week, and I had no one to celebrate it with. I still did not. My love life sucked. I checked that the car was locked and looked around. Where the woman came from I had no idea. Maybe she was there all the time.

Hello, she said, standing on the sidewalk.

I stared for a moment. She was older by maybe twenty years - short hair, pretty. A sleeveless blouse revealed two shoulders without arms. She wore jeans and sandals. She turned to continue walking towards downtown.

Wait, I muttered, unable to get the word out cleanly.

She turned back towards me. I inhaled deeply, unable to contain my excitement. It was then as she took the next step I noticed she used a prosthesis for the left leg.

Do you live around here? she said.

I pointed at the glass door for the entry to the lobby of my building. Upstairs.

This is a little embarrassing, but I need to find a bathroom.

No problem.

I unlocked the door and held it for her, pointing at the elevator. She introduced herself as Joyce Johnson. I told her my name - Kevin Barker. I could not believe I was speaking with a triple amputee, much less that she was going up to my loft.

You’re so kind. Most wouldn’t have spoken with me, much less invited me inside.

Why?

I’m missing so much.

You’re lovely.

The old elevator moved slowly, sometimes creaking loudly. She was so close that I could hear her breathing. I suspected she could hear my heart beating wildly in my chest.

You need your eyes checked, she teased.

No, Joyce. No I don’t.

I unlocked the door of my loft and showed her where the bathroom was. I was tempted to ask if she needed some help, but I expected she could tend to her own needs.

She paused, frowned. Ah, I usually have someone to help me.

If you don’t mind....

She seemed in a hurry, dancing about. Please.

The bathroom door remained open as I unsnapped her jeans, pulled them down along with her underwear. The prosthesis was for a hip disarticulation and covered much of the hip. She said it could remain on. I started to step out to give her privacy when she said I had already seen everything. She chuckled and sat on the toilet seat. I heard the urine hit the water.

She groaned. Had a disagreement with my friend.

The one that helps with stuff like this?

Just a friend with issues. She shook her head. We were at the art supply shop. A large one was a block away. She drove away leaving me behind. Sucks.

Yeah. What did she expect you to do?

Got me.

Joyce said she needed to be wiped, looked at me as if I might not know how, then explained. I willingly obliged. Would I wake to find this was just a dream? I helped her dress.

Guess you don’t need to wash your hands. I laughed.

Kevin, I like your sense of humor. It’s rare anyone makes a joke like that. Why?

Probably they don’t know how to react for fear of doing something wrong.

No, why are you so kind to me?

Now what do I say? Do I express my true feelings? How would she react? Honestly, as I said before, you are lovely and I’d like to know more about you.

Really?

Uh-huh. Can I get you a drink?

Whiskey, if you have any. I need something calm my nerves after this.

I walked to the kitchen where several bottles of liquor lined the counter. She followed. I pulled two glasses from the shelf and poured some in each. After holding the glass to her mouth and letting her sip, her lips remained close by. They pulled me closer, and I kissed her briefly. She did not reject what I had done. A moment passed. This time she kissed me.

Hope you don’t mind, she whispered.

I smiled. I would mind if that was all.

Me too. She chuckled. Don’t care if this is the only time.

I doubt it will be.

She kissed me again, her lips lingering between moments of extreme passion, her body rubbing wantonly against mine. To show desire in normal ways was difficult without arms. I was so ready I did not care. I just wanted us to be naked in bed. It took seconds for us to do that.

Ever been with an amputee like me?

Only in my dreams. I did not want to tell her about Linda.

You say the sweetest things. Joyce rubbed her foot along my thigh, over my erection. She pressed my shaft against my stomach and rubbed more. At least I have a foot. She chuckled.

I watched, still not believing what was happening. The three stumps were neatly formed; the incisions had faded to thin white lines.

If not, we could find ways, I muttered.

Would you prefer that?

I don’t know how to answer that question.

You won’t hurt my feelings.

I’m liking you this way.

Kevin, I love your honesty. You’ll make some lady happy.

Her toes curled around my shaft as she rubbed slowly. I fondled her shoulders, sucking each. Did she really want to lose the other leg? Just seeing her had sent me into wild fantasies, and she had hinted I could be open about my feelings.

You must have men after you...all the...time. I was struggling to get the words out because of the touch of her foot on me.

In my dreams.

That’s great for me.

Sugar, do you really mean that?

Very much. I could take care of you just as well as whoever does now.

She wriggled down my chest and took me in her mouth. After a few slow strokes with her lips, she shifted until her legless hip was by my mouth. I fondled with one hand, teased her opening with a finger. She moaned, suggested we take our time.

We lasted several hours before giving up, little we had not done, and we both wanted more. We were hungry, tired, and sore. I cooked us some scrambled eggs. We remained naked. She hopped instead of using the prosthesis. I loved to watch.

I sometimes use a wheelchair at home, she explained.

Why not all the time? I held the fork to her mouth.

It’s expected I wear the leg.

I’d toss that leg in the trash.

Why?

I think you are nicer looking without it.

Do you mind I don’t have arms?

I rubbed a shoulder, then kissed it. I’m glad you’re the way you are.

I don’t believe you, but I love you said that.

How do you feel about missing so much? I fed her a few bites.

I’m probably okay with it, though I’m quite helpless.

I thought you used your foot quite nicely. I grinned.

Glad you enjoyed it. If I lost the other leg, I couldn’t do that.

What happened, and why do you think you’ll lose the leg?

This did not all happen at the same time. It’s been gradual. Cancer for the leg, an accident left me with one arm off at the shoulder, and the other that was damaged. It didn’t take long for that one to match.

I’m sorry, but not really. I rubbed both shoulders.

Maybe I should be, but I’m not...not really. I know how crazy that might sound. She ate a few bites as I held the fork. The remaining arm looked horrible, and I could hardly use the hand. There was pain. She ate again.

Were you married?

Twice, all after the leg amputation. The cancer is gone like the leg. She grinned. First guy was into leg amputees. That lasted a few years until he found another lady that was younger. Second guy was not much different; we just lived together. He insisted that I wear the leg. He was more into the hardware than the software. She chuckled. He’d have me wear the damned thing in bed when we screwed.

I wouldn’t. I smiled.

I’d stop wearing it for you.

Good. What do you do for a living? I fed her the last bite.

Disability plus some investments from the first divorce. He was wealthy. I admit to being a mercenary back then. She laughed. I’m a recovering mercenary now. She paused to kiss my lips. What do you do?

Software consulting these days. I’ve started and sold several software business. Now it’s mostly to fill my time. I’d rather fill my time with you.

That’s sweet, but don’t you think you’re getting ahead of yourself?

I knew I wanted you the moment I first saw you.

I could be your mother.

And I don’t care.

Did you and your mother...have relations? She looked puzzled.

Joyce, I love the way you look, the way you seem to be comfortable as an amputee, and frankly, I enjoyed our hours of wonderful sex. You could be a little younger, and if you acted the same, then I would still wish to be with you.

Wouldn’t you rather someone your own age?

Why when I have a chance to be with you? Are you trying to talk me out of this?

No, Kevin. I’m just trying to wrap my head around what’s going on. She leaned back and rested the foot on the table, touching the fork, and eventually grasping it between the toes. Life would be very different with me than the ladies you’ve been with before. She moved the fork around. You’ll be doing so much for me...stuff you might not enjoy. Wiping me after I pee is one thing, but wiping my ass.... She sighed. At least I don’t have periods anymore.

We won’t have to worry about birth control.

Thank goodness. She laughed, put the fork down. How long have you wanted to be with an amputee?

I don’t remember not wanting. I had a teacher in grade school missing both an arm and a leg...Ms. Kramer. She was older than my mother, but that did not stop me from having great dreams about her.

Did you ever find out what happened, how she lost the limbs?

There were plenty of rumors, and I never had the guts to talk with her. The most common was that she was run over by a train.

Do you think she did it on purpose?

I once overheard two men talking. One said she wanted to lose the limbs. The other said she only wanted to lose the leg.

I had stopped at the grocery store on the way home. Ms. Kramer was there. She had even said hello then continued shopping. I wanted to follow, but was afraid of having her find just how much she excited me. Two men, probably her age, were following her as well. I found that curious. Later I would learn they were known as devotees, people that enjoyed looking at amputees.

They followed her from a distance, ignoring me. I was thankful, but jealous they were also interested in Ms. Kramer.

I’d love to be with her one man said.

You wouldn’t have a chance said the other.

Imagine what she looks like without clothes.

She’s hot. I hear she wanted to lose the leg, but not the arm.

Well, I heard she wanted to be just like that. I’d give my nuts to marry her.

She lives with another dame. Lesbians. I’d love to watch.

Yeah.

I listened with growing interest. Was any of that true? How did they know so much? I wanted to hear more, but Ms. Kramer left the store with a small sack of groceries, and the two men followed. There was no way for me to follow, but I went outside. She got into her car, they in another, then followed her. I never forgot a word of the conversation, and never told anyone about it.

How did that make you feel?

Damn excited. I chuckled.

"The desire to become an amputee can be mighty powerful for some. They used to call them wannabes, but now its a disorder called BIID. There’s even a surgeon in Colombia that will do amputations. Just ask and she’ll do it."

How do you know so much?

She paused, then stood, balanced on the single leg. I rose and held her close, kissed her lips. I wanted her to be open with me. I fondled one shoulder then the legless hip. I kissed her again. My erection wormed inside. She moaned, leaned her head against my neck. She moaned, thrust against me. I sank deeper inside. We thrust against each other. God, she felt great. She pulled off.

I should be forthright...completely honest with you. She hopped away, turned to face me. Dr. Ruiz, the surgeon in Colombia did each of mine.

I’m glad. I smiled. When will she do the remaining leg?

I haven’t decided.

The person that was helping you?

A troubled lady that does part-time caregiving. I live with a couple in a high-rise condo downtown not far from here. We have an interesting relationship...the three of us. They are out of town for a few days.

My mind is still racing about you having the next amputation. I chuckled.

"I will be even more helpless than