Charisma: Explore Yourself, Improve Communication Skills, Influence People & Be a Great Leader

By Dr. Michael Ericsson

Charisma: Explore Yourself, Improve Communication Skills, Influence People & Be a Great Leader

If you want to Master Self-Esteem, Stop Fear & Stress, Achieve Personal Goals & Attract Success, then this is your book!

This book consists of amazing steps and techniques on how to be happy and on how you can harness inner peace.

What are you waiting for? Kick off your bad habits now and start learning how to control and change yourself—for the better.

What You'll Learn in Charisma: Explore Yourself, Improve Communication Skills, Influence People & Be a Great Leader...

How to Become a Minimalist and Declutter Your Life
How to Overcome Procrastination Forever
How to Eliminate Anxiety
How to Control Your Time and Get Things Done
How to Improve Your Self-Confidence
How to Relief Stress, Relax Your Mind and Achieve Happiness
How to Uncover The Willpower In You
How to Bring Positivity in Your Life
How to Be Present and Productive
How to Defeat Shyness
How to Discover Your Passion
How to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence
And Much More...

Exercise. Once you exercise, even just simple walking, you'll find out that you get this surge of adrenaline. This is because happy hormones are released and therefore, you feel more confident about yourself, and more confident that you are actually capable of doing great things. Plus, once you exercise, you'll get to be happy and very beautiful, too.

Expect more from yourself than others. The good news - everyone believes in what you show. Nobody can read your thoughts to know your doubts. The bad news - you can interpret every people's speech in a wrong way. Any weird reaction and you start worrying without any reason. Psychologists recommend listening to your "inner voice". Make a small experiment: write down every thought while you are lacking of self-confidence. Every time you start worrying, do a two-minute break. Take the list and remind yourself how great you are. Show to your mind the material proof of your self-confidence.

Positive statements. Remember the choice-to train? I know, I can, I know, I can! Positive statements are not about being oblivious to the not so positive but is about proper framing of your reality. Ever the most unpleasant event can be stated in some form of a positive statement. These statements give you the chance to build a productive positive outlook on life which supports your confidence in life. Having a positive outlook on life allows you to access far more of your abilities, thus, you are able to achieve more every day.

This book will help you learn where to start in trying to pursue your passion.  

Improving yourself takes time and effort. You have to be willing to make the changes and be committed to taking action rather than just reading about them.   

The next step is to put to work the steps written in this book and see your life change for the better. Remember, you can do this. Your life is in your hands—so make it great.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Dr. Michael Ericsson
• Release date: Aug 16, 2018
• ISBN: 9781386376224

Book preview

Chapter 1 –  How to Stop Anxiety and Depression

Social anxiety is one of the reasons why individuals lose self-confidence and get anxious being around people. It is a discomfort when a person in public interactions fears of being judged and/or evaluated by other people. Social anxiety is often characterized by an intense fear of what others around them are thinking resulting to a person's thoughts of insecurity and not being good enough to get attention to. Additionally it is assuming that an individual will automatically be rejected.

Consider these questions:

1. Do you feel anxious when you are in public situations, like in parties or simply being out in public?

2. Do you often have trouble participating in social gatherings because of extreme shyness?

3. Do you have the tendency to shy away from people?

4. Do you stress about being humiliated in social settings?

5. Do you feel like you have little or nothing to add in conversations so you end up not speaking or withdrawing all together?

6. Do you worry about others noticing how nervous you are around them?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may be experiencing the symptoms of social anxiety.

To overcome social anxiety, you'll need to master a few strategies.

Challenge your unhelpful thoughts

Your thinking has big impacts on your social anxiety issues. Many of these thoughts take place in your subconscious, thus, you are unable to control them, and they can either be negative or unhelpful thoughts. It's important to know that these thoughts stay as mere thoughts. These thoughts do not necessarily have to be factual.

To challenge those negative and unhelpful thoughts, you will need to question these thoughts; because the majority of the time, these thoughts are simply just based on incorrect assumptions.

The first step to challenging your thoughts is to recognize that these are negative thoughts. Establish what these negative thoughts are and discuss them in your head on how you can make a few changes in your way of thinking. What are these negative thoughts?

These are a few of the common negative thoughts that socially anxious people feed their brain with:

Common negative thoughts before getting into the social situations:

I will embarrass myself.

I don't have anything to add in the discussion.

I know I am going to stammer.

I'll look like a fool.

Common unhelpful thoughts while engaged in public situations:

They are all looking at me.

I am stammering.

I am inadequate.

Common unhelpful thoughts after public situations:

They all thought I was a fool.

Now they know that I am a fool.

I was not intelligent enough to support the conversation.

Unhelpful thoughts about yourself:

Nobody likes me.

I am not a good conversationalist.

I'm a fool.

These are just a few types of unhelpful thoughts that have great impacts on how you deal with social situations. Examine your thoughts. Are the ones listed here the same as your own thoughts?

What you can do

Think about the time when you were socially anxious.

Consider your thoughts while you were in that situation.

Understand and isolate the negative thoughts.

Challenge these thoughts in your head.

Be aware of the common thought patterns that you have.

Knowing your thought patterns:

Reading the minds of the people in the group. Whenever you do this, you assume what other people think without having concrete proof.

Taking everything personally. If you're socially stressed, you tend to take all the things that people say personally, even if they do not pertain to you.

Thinking about what could happen wrong.

Techniques to challenge the negative thoughts

To accurately illustrate, here is an example of a negative thought: I don't have anything to say and they will all think that I am an idiot.

Now, you can ask these questions to challenge that negative thought:

Do you have facts to contradict your negative thought?

Do you recognize a common pattern?

What do you think your friends would tell you if they knew what your thoughts are?

How will you feel about this situation in half a year?

Is there any other way that you can manage the situation?

Stop focusing on yourself

You may be doing it unconsciously but if you are socially stressed, you tend to focus on how you act in front of the group. You are too concerned about how your anxiety might manifest so you become too mindful that you lose focus on the actual interactions and the people you are with.

Try to divert your focus on others rather than on your own actions. Keep in mind that anxiety is less obvious than it really is. If you do observe some obvious manifestation, it doesn't follow that something bad might happen. Everyone becomes anxious at some point so don't think that anxiety is isolated to you alone.

Do not over-analyze things or situations. Socialization is not designed to be analyzed. Don't even replay parts of the conversation in your thoughts but concentrate on what is taking place in today's.

Learn to relax. You don't need to pretend and no need to make an impression. Just be yourself.

Chapter 2 - How to Increase Your Body Language

Communication is a vital part of anyone's life. It is hard to express thoughts and feelings if you don't have the methods to.

People talk to one another verbally and nonverbally. Verbal communication is easy to understand because you get them as it is. Nonverbal communication consists of body language. By understanding how to decipher body language and being conscious of what others are not saying, you will have a better understanding of other people. In addition, it helps you talk more effectively.

Signals make up an enormous chunk of your daily communication. Your facial expressions can say a lot even without you opening your mouth. Those things you don't say speak volumes. Experts say that body gestures make up about 50% to 70% of all your communication. Decoding a person's body language is essential, but you also have to look for other signs like the context of what the other is saying.

People often forget about the value of body language because most are busy talking and thinking about how exactly they are going to impress the other person to close the transaction with a good result. When you need to speak or present to an important client or business partner, you must be able to control your nervousness and prevent unnecessary body gestures that will come off adversely. In a group, conversations are even more difficult because there palm gestures and other indicators are harder to decipher. Ever been in a group where several individuals appear to talking nonverbally? Have you ever had the sense that someone is lying to you? Or was there ever a case when you couldn't believe what the other person was saying?

Figure out how to relax as it also helps relax your brain which means you can think clearly and you look more confident. When you are self-confident, you can speak clearly and with power. Appearing peaceful and confident will let you gain your audience's trust and assurance, as well.

Focus on three aspects: your stance, the position of your head, and breathing. Try maintaining your shoulders slightly going to the back and your chest open, this makes breathing easier. Before your talk, you may take tiny deep breaths to help you get rid of the nervousness.

The right posture is having your head tilted (but not too much, lest you want to be perceived as arrogant), while your spine and back is straight up. You should look like this whether you are sitting on a chair or standing up. You want to command value and authority so you also need to avoid slouching as it could point out a nervousness and insufficient confidence.

You aren't expected to perfect this position immediately but it will pay to practice. Taking benefit of nonverbal signs when working for your business tractions will go a long way.

Keep in mind that it is not always what the other person says that is important; you have to make sure you know how to decode some of the most typical palm gestures and body activities.

Give the body the time it needs to perfect the techniques because it cannot happen over night, you just have to have a great deal of patience and dedication to learn. Proper manners can be learned, so does self-assurance. When you have both of these aspects in mind, it is much easier to learn and understand body gestures.

Chapter 3 - How to Meditate and Have a Healthier Life

The goal of meditation is to let your body relax while you concentrate on a thought or an empty mind for a set period of time. At first, this is quite tough to do especially if you are a person who finds it difficult to concentrate. Usually, anxiety comes from being confused of so many thoughts that come into your head. Such thoughts are hard to manage and they just seem to consume your energy. Meditation can help you concentrate on one thought at a time and resolve it before concentrating on another one. Doing so will relax your stress hormones and give your body some time to recover. You can practice that relaxation method using just a few steps:

Sit comfortably on a chair or on the floor in your most comfortable and relaxing position. Do not slouch because it will make you drowsy.

Close your eyes. This can be difficult at first. If you cannot concentrate by closing your eyes, then you can light a candle and focus your eyes on it.

Do not tense any muscle group. Relax and keep them as such while you concentrate. Breathe naturally to avoid tension.

To help you