Who fills you with ambition, excitement, and belief in yourself? Who sucks the excitement, desire, and self-confidence from your soul?



Other people influence your thoughts, actions, and feelings every day.



The closer your relationship is, the greater the influence.



Our lives are shaped by the people we surround ourselves with, more than the circumstances we find ourselves in.



Your choices about your health, career, hobbies, finances, and values are yours.



Yet, those choices are shaped by your mindset, and your mindset is shaped by your significant other, family, friends, co-workers, and others with whom you invest your time.



When you understand the power others have on you, and the power you have on others, you become more intentional about who you spend your time with, and how that time is spent.





The Power of Others to Influence Your Mood



Vanessa and I are focused, introverted individuals. According to Myers-Briggs, I’m an ISTJ. She’s an ISFJ.



When Vanessa concentrates on something, her countenance is similar to when she is angry, hurt, or frustrated.



My countenance while concentrating is the same as when I'm disappointed, disgusted, or irritated.



If countenance is a new word for you, it means "the look on one's face."



We’ve been married for 13 years and it’s still challenging for me to decipher which emotion she is feeling when she's hard at work.



Often, I assume. And you know what they say...when you assume it makes an (butt) out of you and me. More accurately, just me.



Can you relate to this? Do you have a spouse, family member, friend, or maybe your boss, who has “that look” that immediately changes your emotional state?



This isn’t to say it’s their fault. You can certainly make them aware of how their countenance affects you. Yet, it's still up to you to control your response.



I’ve learned to ask, even if I’m interrupting her flow. “Honey, are you just concentrating on something or are you bothered about something?” Most of the time she’s just concentrating.



Then I let go of the concern and move on with my day.



I'm also aware that the way Vanessa perceives me affects her.



I've become more conscious of my countenance. 



Just this morning, as I was concentrating on this article, Vanessa walked in our office.



I was in the zone and wanted to keep writing, but I knew how that might be perceived. I paused, smiled and even invited her to sit on my lap.



Don't get any ideas. It didn't go any further than that, but my taking the moment to invite her to have a seat, and her willingness to do so created a nice, private moment.



My mood was great after that. A lot better than it would have been if I would have kept writing.



It's easy to spend too much time with people who bring us down, and not enough time with those who lift our spirits.



Our neighbors Keith and Kristie are great examples. Whether we just pass them in the hall as we're walking our dogs, or we go out to dinner, in a moment, or an evening together, we always feel happier after seeing them.



Over the next few days, pay attention to how you feel around certain people. See if you can spend more time with the people who lift you up and less with the time that bring you down.



Remember that you have an influence on others, just as they have an influence on you.



The Power of Others to Influence Your Belief in Yourself



My mom hasn’t always agreed with my choices, but once I made a decision to do something, she's always supported me.



Like when I decided to sell knives instead of getting a "real job" in college. Or when I decided not to take the MCAT after graduation, and instead move to Sioux Falls to open a branch office with Cutco Cutlery. Or when I resigned from Cutco to become a personal trainer. Or when I resigned from Life Time to join Vanessa with our business.



Every time, her response was, "Are you sure?" Translation: I trust your decision, but it makes me nervous.



"Yes,