Resurfacing: Climbing out of the Pit of Grief

By Barbara Troutz

Resurfacing was written out of quiet times with God, while going through the loss of a son. During these quiet times, the author deepened her faith in the God who cares about the details of her life and wanted to use the tragedy for His eternal purpose. Each person who loses a loved one grieves in his or her own way, based on the relationship and personalities. This book is offered to give hope to those who are hurting and who need direction in the storms of life, no matter what those storms are.

This book takes normal, everyday circumstances and situations and uses them to see God, while using Scripture to address the solutions and directions found in God's Word.

Resurfacing is meant to comfort, to encourage, to give hope.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Oct 23, 2015
• ISBN: 9781490890203

Barbara Troutz

Barbara Troutz was raised in New Mexico and currently lives in San Antonio, Texas with her husband Herb. She is a wife, a mother, a grandmother, a friend, a Bible study leader, and a prayer warrior. The roller coaster of life has taught her to rely and depend on the Lord for His plan for her and for those she loves. She is a firm believer that life cannot be complete without the Lord as your guide, time alone in the Word, everyday application, a sense of humor, and close friends.

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Copyright © 2015 Barbara Troutz.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Scriptures taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™

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WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

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ISBN: 978-1-4908-9019-7 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-9021-0 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-9020-3 (e)

WestBow Press rev. date: 10/22/2015

Contents

Dedication

Introduction

What Is Grieving?

Forgiving Death

Stirring Up The Past

Developing Deeper Sensitivity

Watch Those Responses

The Ultimate Hand Me Down

When God Seems Silent

Is It Well With My Soul?

Hold On!!

Talents And Gifts

Carry Them To Jesus

He Carried Me

The Eternal Lay-A-Way Plan

Rainbows And Reminders

Add And Subtract

Letting Go

Psalm 23

It's Dark In Here!

Climbing Out Of The Darkness

Help! I Can’t Swim!

Confusion Sets In

I’m Thirsty

What Do I Believe?

Why, Why, Whine!!

Limited Understanding

The Upside Of Down

Deeper Trust

Going Fishing

Hold Hands

What Part Of Good Do I Not Understand

Destruction By Fire

Idolatry

All Means All

Are You Out There?

Make My Joy Complete

Get Up And Do Something!

Questions Set In

Firsts

Holy Weeks

Mother’s Day

Going Down The Mountain

What Happened To My Joy?

What I Have Learned About Joy

Now, This Is Trust!!

Driving Home

Anniversaries

Looking Up

One On One

Moving Forward

Epilogue

DEDICATION

To my son

In your memory, for you have taught me so much through your life and death. You are missed and I will never forget you. I love you forever.

To my husband

You have been through it all with me. You are my rock, my lover, my best friend. I am blessed. I will always love you.

To my God

To you be the honor and glory, for great things you have done. Thank you for blessing me so richly. My heart belongs to you forever.

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INTRODUCTION

On October 1, 2006, my husband and I found our 36 year old son, Steve, dead in his apartment. I cannot tell you how I felt, but perhaps the thoughts written in this book from my time of grieving can help someone who reads them. That is my intent in sharing from my heart.

Each person who goes through losing a loved one grieves a different way, but I don’t think the pain is any less or any more…just different based on relationships and personalities.

The reasons for writing this book are still not totally clear to me, but three things stand out. First of all, I want to point those who are hurting to Jesus, our source of healing. Secondly, I want to honor my son’s memory by sharing our story. And third, since experiencing Steve’s death, I have desired more that I want my remaining days to count for eternity. Exactly what that means is part of what I have learned through this process of grieving and will continue to learn.

I pray you will be blessed.

Barbara Troutz, Steve’s mom

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

JAMES 1: 2-4

WHAT IS GRIEVING?

Through the loss of loved ones and most recently my son, I am learning that grieving is a process, not to be rushed through, but embraced. There is no other way to get through it but to go through it. It is like each day. Some days are full of ideal weather, sunny, cool, and crisp. Other days bring heat and humidity (especially in south Texas!), and others bring clouds and storms. Grief is like that. Some days are easier to get through than others, but I am learning that in order to really enjoy