Rewire Your Mind: Stop Overthinking. Reduce Anxiety and Worrying. Control Your Thoughts To Make Better Decisions.
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About this ebook
Do you feel endlessly overwhelmed by your own negative brain? Do you lack focus, worry about the future and feel daily anxiety?
If you want a more peaceful, self-controlled mind, this book is for you.
Being anxious and overwhelmed is not surprising in the 21st century. We deal with an excessive amount of expectations: become richer, lose weight, be a better person, think more positive, more more more… We think we need to meet so many expectations, obligations, and duties that we end up crumbling under them, failing to meet any. But do we really?
The greatest barrier to a better life are our self-created, overgrown expectations.
Rewire Your Mind will help you to understand your thoughts, keep your expectations in check and attach the appropriate action to reaching them. Mental clarity equals peace of mind. The goal of this book is simple: free your mind from destructive thoughts, unrealistic expectations, and help you adopt new, constructive habits to release you from tension.
Your mind becomes more creative once released from burdening thoughts.
•How can you stop overthinking
•How to let go of others’ expectations (and your own)
•The main causes of mental clutter
•How to start acting instead of talking
•How to rephrase your negative thoughts
Clear, controlled thoughts release you from stress and anxiety.
•Understand how your brain works – biologically and psychologically
•Make better decisions by knowing what you actually need
•Learn the benefits of top-down thinking
•How to release tension by minimizing social media involvement
What if I told you that the peace of mind you longed for resided in you all along like a pearl waiting to be discovered?
Reading this book you will learn that most of our thoughts can’t even be trusted. Most of our expectations, worries, and fears don’t even exist only in our heads – they are not real. With science-proven exercises and patient practice learn to recognize the worry mongering thoughts and let go of them.
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Rewire Your Mind - Steven Schuster
Endnotes
Introduction
The Advantages of Knowing
To rewire your mind, the first step is to understand how your mind works. In order to simplify something, you have to know what to simplify.
Have you ever made up your mind about changing your thoughts? Did you get washed away by a hell yeah feeling as Metallica played a badass rock song in your head while you mapped out your big plan? For example, maybe you decided to exclude negative thinking from your thoughts, be mindful, and try your best to stay balanced and not lose your temper. You followed your plan well enough for one or two days—you were cool, and when you felt the explosion coming, you took a deep breath and swallowed it back. But on the third day, something bad happened, something more annoying, sad, or frustrating than on the first two days, and boom: negativity, anger and impatience invaded your mind again. Your head got filled with thoughts like stuff always happen to me
and I’ll never be able to be a positive thinker,
and so on.
As you can see, by the time one negative thought ends, another one has captured your worried mind: the realization that you were complaining again despite your life-changing plans of eliminating dark, sorrowful thoughts. Suddenly, the Metallica jam of the previous day transforms into a sad aria, and you fall deeper into the pits of disappointment at not being able to keep up with your resolution.
Stories like this happen very often with us. We set our mind to accomplish something, but the same mind sabotages us. We vow to be nicer to our over-controlling mother, or our sloppy spouse, or our chatty-but-kind-hearted colleague, but all our good intentions get flushed down the toilet when we lose presence in the moment and forget about the vow. Then we react with usual negative, snappy, or mean attitude we so want to avoid. Only when the red clouds disappear do we realize that we experienced another neural hijacking. As a consequence, we start having a fight with ourselves inside our mind. Our mind struggles, blames, craves improvement, and becomes angry for not improving.
Can this neural chaos be tamed somehow?
This is debatable. The best chance one has to dissolve the chaos in their brain is to get to know how it works.
Knowledge—and thus understanding, acceptance, and compassion—dissolves the Gordian knot. You have to know which thoughts you should stop fighting against. Some thoughts are evolutionarily coded into your brain, and you need to stop trying to change them. They can’t be eradicated, but they can be tamed and minimized. How? This book will help you answer this question.
When I was five years old, I thought that taking a breath was some kind of personal deficiency, some vicious form of OCD (obsessive-compulsive disorder) that I should eradicate, otherwise people would think I was a weirdo. As a result, I focused on not taking a breath. Somehow, the impenitent craving to repeat the weirdness with my nose came back after a few seconds. I focused better the next time, but after a minute or so, it came back again. I went to my parents, crying and saying that I was crazy because this stupid snuffle wouldn’t stop. I told them that I tried to stop it, but it kept coming back. You can imagine their bewilderment while listening to me. They told me that the stupid snuffle keeps me alive, and I should never try to stop doing it again. This is how, at the age of five, I learned that breathing is normal.
Ten years later, I learned that the most primitive part of the human brain that we share with all other species—the root brain—is responsible for regulating breathing and other basic life functions. This ancient brain doesn’t think or learn; it’s the autopilot that keeps our body running, granting us survival.¹ My childish attempt to stop the stupid sniffing, therefore, was in vain. Later in this book, we’ll see that stopping breathing is just as impossible as some other fights we have in our head regarding our thoughts.
Which thoughts can be changed, and which are those we should change?
How should we pick our fights with our mind?
Is the fight worthwhile, or does it just create greater chaos?
Isn’t simple understanding more helpful and enlightening?
Sometimes simply knowing that what we think about is not wrong or abnormal can grant us peace of mind. This leads to acceptance, and the mental knot will dissolve by itself.
Over the years, I learned that having negative thoughts is neither abnormal nor unnecessary. What’s more, sometimes they are completely grounded, and if I’d lived a hundred thousand years ago, they’d be indispensable.
This is why I chose to go through the rudimentary activity of our minds in the following chapters. Yes, minds—both the thinking and observing mind.
The Advantages of Not Knowing
I get many emails from readers asking how they can shut down their negative mental small-talk. You know, that kind of annoying cerebral chitchat that tells them they will never find a good partner, or their business will never hit the six-figure-per-month income they desire. Before you start thinking something’s wrong with you, let me tell you that we all have this kind of self-talk. Even those who score a happiness touchdown most days face diminished self-esteem struggles once in a while.
Reading Mark Manson’s controversial bestseller, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, confirmed something for me that I’d suspected for a long time, but had never really thought about in depth.
People sometimes don’t know what they are talking—and therefore, thinking—about.
What do I mean here? Exactly what I wrote. We sometimes have no idea why we act the way we do or say things in a certain way. Sometimes we are totally calm, but in the next moment, we lose our cool and become anxious, depressed, or contrarily, very happy. We talk about