A Victim’S Guide to Surviving a Narcissist/Sociopath

By Sereena Nightshade

Pretty is as pretty does, and while its true that money makes the world go round, nice is what makes it habitable. The Victims Guide to Surviving the Narcissist/Sociopath is a quick guide book describing what a typical narcissist/sociopath is and what his/her typical victim is. While the common wisdom dictates that the sociopath/sociopath type predator goes after only those who are of little or no worth, the stupid, the uneducated and perhaps the hopelessly poor/ignorant the reality is oftentimes the polar opposite. The average in-home/family man/family woman sociopath predator goes after someone who is not a predator while that someone does have a lot to offer the sociopath/sociopath type. The predator wants a partner or spouse that offers a great deal of value to strip-mine away. An uneducated moron frequently does not appeal to a sociopath predator that is looking at more than an extremely short-term quick gain. This book provides readers with a fast get-down-to-it look at what a narcissist/sociopath is, what one of these predators does and it gives readers some basic nutshell advice that is surprisingly hard to come by. A must read for victims and prospective victims alike whether not yet captured by a narcissist/sociopath or already captured and beginning to figure out, perhaps, that as a victim or prospective victim you may be in trouble. This book tells all, for its brevity, starting with the warning signs to the final war plan with all most of the ugly details included. Photos herein are taken from more than one city location.

Names of individuals in all of this authors books are fictitious names. Real names are not revealed.

By Sereena Nightshade

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Jan 10, 2014
• ISBN: 9781493154371

Book preview

Copyright © 2013 by Sereena Nightshade. 144443-GROO

ISBN: Softcover 978-1-4931-5436-4

EBook 978-1-4931-5437-1

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Rev. date: 12/20/2013

To order additional copies of this book, contact:

Xlibris LLC

1-888-795-4274

www.Xlibris.com

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Contents

Key Terms

Who & What the Predator is – The Sociopath or Sociopath Type Abuser

The Achilles’ Tendon

Strip Mining

Public Record Data/Events: Which is Oftentimes Which?

What Can A Prospective Victim Do/Look For?

Additional Signs to Look For

What Can a Victim who is Already Trapped in a Relationship with a Sociopath Do

State by State Know the Rules

How Much is That Baby in the Window?

The Shimmering Realm of Perception

Brush-Up

Fatally Flawed Pattern Review

~ Vital Details ~

General Relationship Red Flags

Considerations – Whenthe Flags May Potentially Not Apply

Someone Once Said: I will place a weak lamb before each of you and if you slay it or neglect it till its life force subsides I will know your true heart. If each of you keep this lamb safe and nurtured and well all men shall profit and all men shall be saved by the grace of this one being fulfilled in the multitudes of the lambs placed everywhere before all of mankind.

By Sereena Nightshade

Whoever saves one life, saves the entire world.

By Itzhak Stern.

I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.

By Nelson Mandela

Courage is the most important of all the virtues, because without courage you can’t practice any other virtue consistently. You can practice any virtue erratically, but noting consistently without courage.

By Maya Angelou

Courage is being scarred to death… and saddling up anyway.

By John Wayne

Courage is huge and failure to protect is the ultimate deal demolisher.

By Sereena Nightshade

The police think that just because he didn’t kill you he didn’t somehow end your life…

Author: Unknown.

Regarding false allegations: First rule of the witch hunt; don’t limit yourself to the witches.

An adult male predator’s mainstay quote: It’s not me, her daddy done it.

This holds true even if her daddy didn’t do it. The same wording can be used to pass the blame onto another from the victim’s past who is reasonably to completely innocent while the abuser is guilty.

By Sereena Nightshade

Pretty is as pretty does, and while it’s true that money makes the world go round, nice is what makes it habitable. Please keep in mind that in Old English times nice meant foolish as in basically stupid or retarded.

Cliché’s put together and connected to the final thought by Sereena Nightshade

C:\Documents and Settings\Dell\Local Settings\Temporary Internet Files\Content.Word\Picture 094.jpg

Above: Photo by Sereena Nightshade.

Key Terms

1.  DTO – Danger to others.

2.  DTS- Danger to self.

3.  Delusional – there are mild delusions and extreme delusions. The sociopath/sociopath type predator will oftentimes accuse his/her adult victim of suffering from the severe form of delusions. A person who actually suffers from extreme pervasive delusions cannot function normally in day to day life (i.e. cannot hold a job or perform well at a full time job, cannot maintain close friendships, cannot engage in successful daily hobbies that require high-level functioning, cannot demonstrate an ability to keep up with normal daily life tasks, cannot demonstrate a consistent daily ability to care for children/home life, etc.).

4.  Mentally unstable – the definition of type utilized by a sociopath in false allegations is extreme mental instability though the authorities the sociopath uses via manipulation are completely ignorant of the psychiatric reality of someone who is mentally unstable in the manner the average sociopath abuser states his/her adult victim is.

5.  Suicidal – a desire or plan to kill oneself. People who are actually suicidal typically have a specific plan and time frame in mind for the act.

6.  Homicidal – a desire or plan to kill another.

7.  Critical thinking – a form of thinking wherein the person considers the when, where, why, how as well as the logic in the details in the story and if the story actually makes sense – could there be an ulterior motive, does the story really add up – playing Devil’s advocate, etc.

8.  Postpartum depression – a depressed state oftentimes mixed with serious delusional thinking/psychosis which can occur after a baby is born.

9.  PTSD – Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. A stress disorder caused by having experienced extreme trauma.

10.  Achilles’ Tendon Factor – that one life-ending weakness that is individual to each and every person. Most people have no idea what their Achilles’ Tendon Factor is and believe they do not have such a factor though in truth they do.

11.  Brokenness – a state a sociopath predator can be in where his/her abusive actions are never rewarded and thus he/she behaves normally or relatively normally. The state of brokenness does not cause the sociopath to live in a state of inner-agony as it would for people that are not sociopaths. Brokenness for a sociopath is not the same as brokenness for others.

12.  Sociopath – a person that does not have the capacity for the normal range of emotions and mental processing. Typically average to above average IQ, yet incapable of sincerely normal feelings of love, caring, sympathy, empathy, remorse. A sociopath can; however, feel offended.

13.  Narcissist – a true narcissist thinks only of himself/herself. Views the entire world from himself/herself outward – he/she is the center of the world and all that matters in the world. Etc.

14.  Sociopath/Narcissist – in true cases many sociopaths are narcissists and many narcissists are also for the most part sociopaths.

15.  Damien Child – a child who is born or becomes literally nothing other than a tool for a sociopath’s false allegations against another or others. A child who is nothing other than a tool used as an excuse by a sociopath predator to justify his/her severe abuse against others inside of the inner-nucleus/home all in the name of protecting the Damien Child who in truth is not abused by anyone other than perhaps the sociopath predator using the child within that home. Such a child has his/her entire humanity/entire life as a person stolen and is also frequently groomed and trained to himself/herself become a predator taking pleasure in the suffering of others who are abused in his/her name.

16.  Strip mining – similar to gold digging, but in strip mining the predator takes everything, not just money or inanimate assets.

17.  Gold digger – someone who latches onto and uses another person, usually for the gain of money or the lifestyle another person’s money can afford. Some gold diggers also latch onto or go after assets the other person has (i.e. home, car, etc.).

18.  Mini-me syndrome – the view of one’s child/children as little Me(s) instead of as individual living people – children as extension of self to be used, for the most part, as tools for selfish pleasure and/or gain or to fulfill one’s destiny or succeed where one failed at goals pre-set before the arrival of the child/children. This includes projecting one’s own identity, feelings, ideas, thoughts, plans and agendas upon one’s child/children, including adult identity/agendas the child/children could not possibly in reality have. A sociopath/narcissists child/children are usually mini-me(s) as well as used as non-living tools for gain of the abuser’s desires.

19.  Allegations – accusations of wrong doing waged against another person.

20.  Keeping Sweet – means to act sweet no matter how one actually feels.

21.  Promise Keepers – a Christian group of men that seek old-fashioned traditional ideals and gender roles in their marital and family relationships.

22.  Authorities – police, social services, CPS workers, courtroom workers, judges, mental health professionals, medical professions – those in positions of power at any point and time/decision makers a sociopath/sociopath type abuser can manipulate and use.

23.  CPS – Child Protective Services.

24.  Variant – various, variety, different (nutshell definition).

25.  Context clues – what one should use while reading this book. Clues in the entire sentence and/or paragraph that provide clues or the definition of what the sentence/paragraph/etc. actually states above and beyond any errors or typos therein.

26.  Target – in this book the Target refers to the sociopath’s victim.

27.  Supply Source – what the sociopath/sociopath predator views other people as being – nothing other than supply sources for using and usually strip mining.

28.  Adult victim – the adult victim of the sociopath/sociopath type is oftentimes the spouse; however, outsiders, including business prospects/partners can also become adult victims. Outsiders; however, are commonly not as severely abused as the spousal victim inside of the home.

29.  Flat-affect – an expressionless appearance or the appearance in demeanor where the person, typically the victim, shows little or no emotion. Common for victims of long-term severe abuse, long-term severe abuse with no hope of remedy/rescue/justice, concentration camp/war victims. Oftentimes a positive development for adult victims within the inner-nucleus of a sociopath’s home since such a predator uses any emotional reaction the victim may show as a guideline of what abuses to repeat in order to hit pay-dirt in his/her ability to hurt the victim.

30.  Inner-nucleus – the inner-home environment of the sociopath/sociopath type abuser. The inside world that outsiders rarely see.

31.  Pedophile – someone who is sexually attracted to children and may be sexually abusing a child or children. Not all sociopaths are pedophiles.

32.  Public Record – herein refers to records such as police records, police reports, court reports/documentation, psychiatric reports/documentation, etc.

By Sereena Nightshade

C:\Documents and Settings\Dell\My Documents\My Pictures\Mickels.room.and.closet.at.my.condo.with.his.dog.Sedona.2008.or.2009.jpg

Above: A child’s room in Sereena Nightshade’s world 2007-ish.

PROLOGUE

The key to surviving a sociopath/sociopath type personality is to first not become personally or professionally linked to one. In this survival track one identifies the predator before it is too late. Unfortunately the typical sociopath/sociopath type has an average to more commonly above average IQ, a smooth façade (i.e. fake front personality), and he/she is oftentimes a person with a high level of self-control (i.e. he/she does not blow his/her proverbial wad showing what he/she is early on) and a sharp observer of human nature. As a sharp observer of human nature the sociopath/sociopath type is able to people watch with tremendous accuracy. The predator can read the most subtle signs you transmit via your body language, clothing, vehicle/hone/apartment presentation (i.e. location and look of where you live), factors of your job (i.e. what you are exposed to and experienced with and at what level/closeness), factors of your family (i.e. different

Reviews for A Victim’S Guide to Surviving a Narcissist/Sociopath

[Paul Dietz · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Straightforward and concise. Having been married to one it all falls into place. Life is exhausting so if you can read the signs before getting too deep you'll be much better off. It's easy to read style makes it recommended reading for anyone before they start dating.