BALANCED PARENTS Create Global Peace

By Ingrid Wild

Our chaotic world is out of balance. It should come as no surprise that our planet is rebelling. We have treated the earth with shortsightedness and without respect. To get it back in balance we must first learn to get ourselves in balance. To attain world peace we must work on inner peace. We must learn to live in harmony within our families and ourselves, and then with all people and all nations. We must bring up future generation with foresight and awareness so as to not repeat the oversights of past generations, so our children can evolve. This book is written with a spiritual emphasis and applies to anyone who wants to grow and mature. By applying the examples in this book, you can gain greater self-understanding. A portion of the book is specifically geared towards child-rearing.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ingrid Wild
• Release date: May 26, 2011
• ISBN: 9781465830722

Ingrid Wild

I believe that experience is still the best teacher. A college education in any subject does not make us an expert. Education gives us knowledge but not practical experience. There is no substitute for first-hand experience.I successfully raised my children and 70% single-handedly. My book primarily addresses the parent, although it has many examples of what works with children.Much in our world is out-of-balance. To regain that balance we must become conscious of our thinking and our actions. We also must first heal ourselves in order to save and heal our earth. This in turn allows us to bring up balanced, conscious, and responsible children.

Book preview

You can’t give your child what you don’t have.

BALANCE

Balance is the secret of a happy life.

Any person, system or thing that is out of balance will collapse or break down sooner than necessary. The speed of disintegration depends on the degree of imbalance.

An unbalanced political system will fall apart as we have witnessed with Russia not allowing people their freedom. A country’s deranged rulers can control its society for only so long and the ruin of its unbalanced, controlling system is certain.

Here are more examples to prove that balance is necessary.

An unsymmetrical building will disintegrate much faster than a balanced building. There will be too many stress points that cause a more rapid deterioration.

Unevenly balanced wheels on your car will wear out your tires at least three times as fast as balanced wheels, and it will also cause more wear and tear on the rest of your car.

And so is it with people. An emotionally unbalanced person will eat an unbalanced diet with too much sugar, too many carbohydrates, too much fat and/or meat, just plain overeat, and possibly use drugs or alcohol that put the body out of balance. With this kind of lifestyle, illness or an early death are inevitable. Just think of what overeating and the extra pounds you have to carry do to your back, knees, feet, and heart. With that excessive weight, there is added strain and stress. All the major organs are overburdened too; your heart has to work harder, and wears out prematurely. Not keeping one’s body in balance causes much suffering and expense in the future, not to mention what being overweight does to your psyche. Eating a low calorie diet is more desirable and will keep one in shape and mentally and physically healthy. Many of the diseases that are prevalent now did not exist in the very lean years during WWII and for some years after. Heart conditions, diabetes, and many other diseases were less prevalent. In those hungry times when the diet was very sparse, people were healthier.

Lack of exercise also contributes to an imbalance in the body. All body parts are meant to be used, but not abused. It is possible to overdo or under do anything. In other words don’t go to any extremes. Balance means to bring into harmony or proportion.

Are you a workaholic? If so, that is an imbalance in your life. At times one could be escaping from reality to get away from a spouse or children or domestic chores. Possibly the corporation with whom you are employed demands that you overwork. Working more than eight hours per day, day in and day out, is leading an unbalanced life. What good is the money if you never have the free time to enjoy the fruit of your labor? Just to buy a fancier car or a bigger house? The $20,000 car gets you to work or wherever you want to go just the same as the $80,000 luxury car. The difference is that you will only have to work one fourth as hard. The slick car will only serve your ego, not any necessity. Why own an oversized house jut to work harder or longer hours and then have more expense and upkeep? You can only sleep in one bedroom, only sit in one chair, and only watch one television at a time. Perhaps you realize that the corporation is running and ruining your life for its own selfishness and greed. Many people have left the corporate world because they came to the conclusion that it was not in their best interest, nor to their advantage or actual benefit to kill themselves prematurely for another’s acquisitiveness and dominance. Too much work can cause headaches, depression, and perhaps ulcer or worse in years to come. You are of no use to your family, yourself or your boss if you get a heart attack. You, your family, and your health should have equal status to your work if you want a balanced happy life. We all have been told or taught that working hard is the right thing to do. I was told that no one ever died from hard work, and I have lived by that motto for many years. But anything that is out of balance can’t be healthy.

A balanced individual adheres to a balanced budget. It does not matter how high or how low your income is, you can always spend above your means. You can also develop a budget and discipline yourself to stay within your income. Pay your bills first, and then see how much money is left for other things. To not spend above your income takes vigilance. The saying I learned while growing up that my mother cherished was You can only stretch as far as your blanket reaches does not seem to be compulsory any longer. Especially in these modern times where it is so easy to buy now and pay later, if at all, with credit cards, allowing one to spend above available finances. It is unethical to spend more than you can pay for. Money is faith, or trust! To teach your children anything at all you must be in control of your own emotions and impulses.

I had immigrated with my family to the United States when my then two year old son came running into the kitchen all excited asking, How come we don’t go back to Germany for a visit? I responded, Because we can’t afford it. In the next sentence he said, We can fly now and pay later. That is what a PanAm Airlines commercial fed his mind. My son instantly became an American. Television has been and still is brainwashing society, and it has done lots of damage in many ways. Television is playing with our psychology and our emotions whether it is a food, perfume, or car commercial. And so is the so-called news, which often induces fear, a negative emotion. A fearful society can be controlled. We need to do our own thinking and therefore be leery of television and the media, which are constantly trying to influence and bombard us.

Simplify your life for more balance and happiness. Spend more time with your spouse and children, as well as some time alone every day. Do some fun things together that don’t cost anything. Get closer to nature, go for walks, go swimming, have a picnic at the beach, go biking, spend a weekend per month camping in the desert, the forest or in the mountains, grow a vegetable garden or flowers. Go ice skating together, skiing, bowling or whatever you love doing. Playing outdoors in clean, fresh air is especially beneficial for your mind, body and soul. It will recharge your battery. City life, the industrial age, and the technology and information age have removed us in the last two hundred years from the magic and wonderment of nature. In turn, this removes us from spirituality.

Indoor games can be fun, too. You could go bowling together, play board games in your home around the fireplace, tell stories, or read a good book. Some more indoor activities are woodcarving, painting, or cooking a meal together. In your spare time, stay away as much as possible from the radiation of television, computers and cell phones.

People that cultivate hobbies and make use of their creativity are more content and balanced.

Put aside time for friendships. Keep friends that have a positive attitude and an open mind with whom you can have interesting conversations or to share common interests, like cooking, traveling, camping or sports.

Last, but not least, give yourself some space away from work, family, and friends. Find quiet time on a daily basis for contemplation and meditation to achieve a balanced you, even if it is only five to fifteen minutes. It will make you happier, healthier, and a better and more balanced parent and person. To be or become a balanced person one must pay daily attention to the body, mind, emotions, and soul. To achieve that, one needs a natural diet, exercise, and daily meditation. I cover each of these subjects in later chapters. For some, this may sound a bit overwhelming. But for now, begin in at least one of these areas.

A big portion of the content of this book is applicable to all people who want to grow, achieve balance and, in short, master life and create more happiness. This book is particularly addressed to parents.

When we are in balance—mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally—we are able to make correct decisions. We don’t need advice from other people.

When we are out of balance, we are bound to make the wrong decisions. Coming from fear, we are not able to think clearly. When we are insecure or confused we need to ask others for advice. Their decisions may not be the right ones for us. When we are angry we are apt to make rash impulsive decisions that come from the ego and those won’t serve us well either.

Balance means choosing the Middle Road.

Putting your Life in Balance is Happiness.

Psychological Balance is Wholeness.

When we stay in balance we can achieve more and more easily without struggle.

RELATIONSHIPS

Relationships are by far more important than money.

Our relationships, foremost with our family and children, but also with our friends and at our place of work, are one of the most important things in life. The ideal relationship is a harmonious one.

But relationships can be the most trying things we have to deal with. Many of us have a lot of work to do in that area. Being emotionally involved, which is the case with our families, children, and friends makes the situation more difficult. Even psychologists, who can see and analyze other people’s problems clearly, have pain and struggle with their own relations and children, simply because they are emotionally connected with these people. It is easier to rationalize someone else’s problem, but more difficult to work with our own. We get easily confused when our mind tells us one thing and our emotions are in a different zone altogether.

Relationships can put a lot of stress in our lives, especially being around negative, unhappy friends or family members. People who constantly complain and unload repeatedly the same problems are not willing to grow and learn from their experiences. They will rob us of our energy and drag us down with their negativity. They make themselves and everyone around them miserable and eventually ill. We all must learn to recognize the opportunity to grow and evolve from each negative experience. There is a positive side in each experience or tragedy. We only need to see the light. Someone that is not willing to grow is stuck and cannot be helped. No one can help us, not even the best psychiatrist, if we don’t have the desire to help ourselves. We must be ready and open to listen, then follow their advice.

Friends that enjoy staying in their negative mode are best avoided. When we make time and room for someone new we give ourselves a chance to meet someone that is healthier, with a more positive attitude. Of course this cannot be the answer to our family relationships. We cannot just pack up and leave our children.

Wonderful relationships take time and patience. One must be a good communicator. Healthy communication requires open-mindedness, the ability to see the other side like it is our own, putting emotions and ego outside of ourselves for the time being, and possessing the wisdom to hear another and really listen. To convince or insist on another to agree with you is not communication. It is persuasion. Wise people don’t need anyone to agree with them. Having the need to be right comes from the ego. It is a form of insecurity.

To have a truly great relationship you must be open and honest about your feelings. You must be big enough to admit when wrong. You must have the ability to laugh at your mistakes and not take yourself too seriously. A sense of humor is a great asset.

Any relationship gives us an opportunity to grow, especially raising children. Good parents take time out to grow. Aware, enlightened parents do not think they have all the right answers. Sometimes we can learn by listening to our children. I know some cases where the child has more wisdom than the mother does. One of the mothers knew and admitted it. Growing is a never-ending process. There is no end in our evolution.

A caring parent is present and wants to understand and know his or her child on a deeper level. This takes observation and time. The best parent is gentle, loving, and powerful; with integrity, insight/foresight, compassion, kindness and generosity.

Wholesome parents relish having special relationships with their children. They find time to spend with their children and communicate with them on a daily basis. Some parents think that teenagers don’t need tending any longer. Teenagers have lots of insecurities and need a parent on a regular basis for frank discussions. Open communication must start early in your children’s lives.

The things that are most important in life are satisfying relationships, freedom, happiness, self-respect, self-worth, health, emotional security, peace, love, joy, grace, and appreciation. All of the above are much more meaningful and important for real happiness than any amount of money. In the end, growth, maturity, and the wisdom gained from our experiences are the only valuable things that stay with us forever, until eternity.

Before all else you must have an honorable relationship with the self. Love the self, and then you will be able to love everyone and have worthy relationships.

Excellent relationships will help you stay in balance, in harmony, and in peace.

A loving, harmonious relationship with your spouse is a prerequisite to being a balanced parent.

TIME SPENT WITH YOUR CHILDREN

The time spent with your children is time well spent.

The caring parent will spend as much time as possible with his or her child, especially the first two to three years. To really get to know and understand your children at their most inner essence you must be fully present. The time you do not spend with your children can never be made up. Would any money be worth missing out on the first smile from your child, their first steps, or the first words your child utters? The clock cannot be turned back to