In compassionate parenting, we talk a lot about emotions. In today’s episode I’m explaining the 5 emotional needs of kids, how unmet needs show up in behavior and how you can support your child’s emotional health.In last week’s Parenting 101 episode, I talked about the core needs of attachment and authenticity for humans, including how we can teach better coping strategies while validating our kids’ emotions and authentic selves.This week, we’re diving deeper into what is really going on when your child is misbehaving. Remember, feelings drive behavior. As parents, we can use our kids’ behavior as information to help them deal with the emotions underneath. 5 Emotional Needs of KidsThese five needs are essential for all of us, and anytime we have a need that isn’t being met, we’ll look for a strategy to cope or try to get what we want. The same is true of our kids.Please don’t judge yourself as we go through these. It is not your responsibility to meet every one of these needs at all times, but it is important to recognize that when your child has an unmet need, they will have feelings about it (fear, worry, sadness, etc.) and these will show up in their behavior. AttachmentFor humans, attachment means safety. Kids need to feel safe, secure and connected in their relationship with their parents. An unmet need for attachment feels unsafe, insecure, worried, anxious, scared or hurt. AcceptanceThis relates to our core need for authenticity, the ability to be accepted for who we are, without conditions or expectations. Your child doesn’t want to believe that they have to earn your love. They want to feel like, at their core, they’re great and there is nothing wrong with them. When kids start to sense that they aren’t being accepted for their authentic self, they might feel rejected, unwanted, neglected or abandoned.AffectionOur children thrive on physical touch and affection. This physical affection can serve as a symbol of your connection and attachment. Unmet affection needs show up as feelings of loneliness, fear or sadness. AppreciationWe all have work to do in the world. We have a primal need for our lives to matter and to feel like we have purpose. Even kids need to feel seen and that they matter. They need to feel valued and recognized for their efforts and achievements. Feeling unappreciated can also look like feeling unworthy, disapproved of or even unlovable. AutonomyKids crave a sense of independence and control over their lives (as becomes obvious when they learn the word “no” as toddlers). The need for agency and autonomy is there at all ages, but becomes especially true during the teen years. In order to go out into the world, they need to believe that they have power over their lives and be trusted with that power. When this need isn’t met, we feel powerless, trapped and scared.  Supporting Your Kids’ Emotional NeedsI sometimes call this therapeutic parenting, because you’re learning how the brain and psychology work so that you can become your child's emotional coach, guiding them through navigating their emotions and understanding their needs.When you see arguing, blaming, stalling, hitting, kicking, spitting, complaining, intense crying, hiding, lying or other challenging behaviors, you can get curious about what feelings and unmet needs are underneath.Step 1: Tune into your child’s emotional state. Be present, listen actively, and offer empathetic responses. Our kids need to feel seen, heard, and valued for their emotional experiences. We need to be present and attuned to their...