The Art of Self-love: The Art of Mastering Life, #2

By RAVI LALIT TEWARI

• Imagine waking up daily feeling delighted, confident, and at peace with who you are!
• Imagine living a life free from the constant burden of self-doubt, anxiety, and negative self-talk!
• Imagine embracing your unique qualities and strengths and living a life that is authentic to who you are!

◆◆◆

 

This is not a far-fetched dream. This is the power of self-love!

 

But now, if you come out of your imagination, you will find the reality - many of us struggle with self-love!

 

We struggle with self-doubt and negative talk. We constantly seek validation from others. We feel like we are not living up to our full potential.

Believe me, you are not alone if you are the same.

 

Our society often tells us we're not enough and must change ourselves to fit in or succeed. We are bombarded with messages telling us we must look and act a certain way and achieve certain things to be happy and fulfilled.

 

But here is the thing: True happiness and fulfillment don't come from external sources. They come from within. And the key to unlocking that inner happiness and fulfillment is self-love.

 

The Art of Self-Love is not just another self-help book. It's a transformative guide that will help you unlock the power of self-love and unleash your full potential. It's a journey that will challenge, empower, and inspire you to live an authentic, fulfilling life aligned with your deepest desires.

 

In this book, you will discover the tools, insights, and practices that will help you:

• Overcome self-doubt and negative self-talk.
• Build a deep and lasting sense of self-worth and self-esteem.
• Develop healthy habits and routines that prioritize self-care and well-being.
• Embrace your unique qualities and strengths.
• Cultivate gratitude, positive self-talk, and compassion.
• And so much more…

 

◆◆◆

 

But this is not just about improving yourself. It's about recognizing your inherent worth and embracing the beauty of your imperfections. It's about learning to love and accept yourself unconditionally, exactly as you are right now.

 

The journey of self-love is not always easy. It requires courage, patience, and persistence. It requires us to confront our deepest fears and insecurities and challenge the limiting beliefs that hold us back. But it's a journey that is worth taking.

 

And I would be grateful if you could accompany me on this journey by reading and keep learning from this book.

 

Get ready to embark on an exciting journey of self-discovery and self-love with this incredible book! It will guide you along the way, offering a clear roadmap to help you unlock your full potential and live the life you've always dreamed of. With every turn of the page, you'll feel inspired, challenged, and empowered to become the best version of yourself. So, let's dive in and start this incredible adventure together!

 

So,

• Are you ready to embark on this journey of self-discovery and self-love?
• Are you ready to unlock the power of self-love and transform your life?

◆◆◆

 

♥♥ If so, then let's begin. Your best life is waiting for you. ♥♥

• Language: English
• Publisher: RAVI LALIT TEWARI
• Release date: Apr 15, 2023
• ISBN: 9798215493588

Book preview

INTRODUCTION

I am constantly evolving and transforming. The person I was 10 years ago is not who I am today, and the person I will become in five years is still a work in progress. I strive to be the best version of myself, knowing that growth and self-improvement are lifelong pursuits.

- Ravi L Tewari

I

n 2009, shortly after her husband Barack Obama was inaugurated as President of the United States, Michelle Obama caused a stir when she wore a sleeveless dress to an official White House event. Not only was her decision to go sleeveless unconventional for a First Lady, but her toned arms and skin were also visible, which sparked further commentary about her appearance.

Some critics claimed that Michelle's decision to show her toned arms were inappropriate and unbecoming of a First Lady, while others praised her for her confidence and body positivity.

Despite the criticism, Michelle remained true to herself and continued to wear sleeveless dresses and other more casual outfits to public events throughout her time as First Lady. Her fashion choices showed that women can be confident in their skin and express their personal style, even in formal settings.

In an interview with CBS News following the incident, Michelle addressed the controversy surrounding her outfit choice, saying, Look, women, wear what you love. That's all I can say. That's my motto. I wear what I like because...I gotta be in the dress, so... Her comments showed that she was confident in her own skin and unapologetic about her fashion choices.

Michelle also acknowledged the double standards women face regarding dress codes, saying, People are always going to have opinions, and people have opinions about everything...I just try to be practical in my choices, and then whatever people want to say, they can say. Her response showed that she was not afraid to challenge societal norms and expectations and believed in the importance of self-love and self-expression.

SINGLE OR READY TO MINGLE?

Once, in one of my webinars, one participant asked me - Hey Ravi, you always talk about self-love but tell me, why fall madly in love with oneself when one has other beautiful relationships around? Is it not considered self-centered to prioritize your own needs over those of the people who love you?

And my answer to her was this,

When a woman or a man is looking for a relationship, I think it's important to remember that you're not looking for someone to complete you. You can frequently hear - Oh, she completes me. Oh, he completes me. But, the reality is, it's your job to complete yourself. You are your own rescue.

When you recognize that it is your job to complete yourself, you take ownership of your life and embrace the power to shape your destiny. This realization is liberating because you do not have to rely on others to make you whole or complete.

Consider this statement - "If you understand that it's your job to complete you, nothing else needs to be done."

When you accept this truth, you can focus on developing your inner resources and capabilities, leading to greater self-confidence, resilience, and fulfillment.

I'm 100% complete at this moment; you are 100% complete at this moment, and we all are 100% complete at this moment. You can always shape and improve your life by refining, elevating, and engaging at a higher level, but remember that you are already 100% complete at this moment.

It's essential to remember that the journey of personal growth and self-improvement is an ongoing process, as there is no definitive endpoint to our quest for self-discovery. As we evolve and grow, we continually reshape our lives, striving towards the next best version of ourselves.

This idea is exemplified in the statement, you are never completed. you always evolve, emphasizing that personal growth is a continuous process of expansion and self-transcendence.

An excellent example of this concept is the realization that I am not the person I was 10 years ago, and I'm not the man I will be in five years. I'm a better version of who I was, and the next best version of me is emerging.

As we continue to evolve, there is always room for further development and self-improvement.

A loving relationship should not be the sole source of your happiness or completeness. Instead, it should complement the completeness you already have within yourself.

The purpose of relationships is to accompany you in your personal growth journey, guiding you toward the next stage of your evolution. They also teach you how to establish healthy boundaries and enable you to say yes despite your fears of being hurt while still holding the possibility of finding love. Think of it as a dance with your future self.

You should feel secure and happy with yourself before committing to a relationship. It's unfair to expect another person to make you feel complete or solve your problems. In a relationship, two imperfect people come together, so expecting perfection is unrealistic. However, despite imperfections, you can still have a wonderful experience with another person. But self-love is a prerequisite for achieving this state of contentment and fulfillment.

As you grow and learn to love yourself, you'll realize that a healthy relationship is more important than being right. Instead of striving for victory, you can find common ground and create a strong, harmonious bond. By prioritizing your needs and fostering self-love, you'll be better equipped to build fulfilling relationships that bring out your best.

Of course, nothing is wrong or bad if you want to love someone more in your life, But...

Before considering falling deeply in love with another person, it is essential to prioritize falling deeply in love with yourself. Doing so can bring that self-love into a relationship, setting a standard for how they should love you.

Expecting someone else to love you better than you love yourself is unrealistic. How you love yourself is the initial example of how your partner should love you.

By increasing your self-love, you can expect positive changes in all areas of your life, including your relationships. Your love for yourself serves as a reflection of how others treat you.

Now, the question that might pop into your mind is - How do I develop such a strong love for myself that allows me to accept, express, and share my love, brilliance, and light with others?

Did I read your mind? I know, I did!

I understand that it's natural to see results quickly, but it's important to be patient and kind to ourselves as we navigate the ups and downs of our personal journeys. Many strategies, techniques, practices, and resources are available to help us build a more positive and loving relationship with ourselves.

Did you know that Zen monks struggle to understand why someone would not love themselves? They are raised in an atmosphere of love and cultivate love and appreciation in their daily thoughts, actions, rituals, and behaviors. As a result, they gradually develop a sense of wholeness and affection towards themselves and others. Loving oneself is no longer a task they must deliberately practice.

Amazing! Isn't it?

In the forthcoming chapters of this book, you'll learn about a range of strategies and techniques that can help cultivate a more profound sense of self-awareness, self-acceptance, and self-love. By staying open to new ideas and approaches, you can continue to grow and evolve in your relationship with yourself and build a solid foundation for healthy and fulfilling relationships with others.

Keep reading...

––––––––

2

YOUR LOVE STORY BEGINS WITH SELF-LOVE

You can search the entire universe for someone more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe.

- Buddha

WHAT IS SELF-LOVE?

Self-love, a journey within,

A path that's sometimes hard to begin.

But step by step, with patience and care,

We can learn to love ourselves and to be aware.

Aware of our strengths, aware of our flaws,

And aware that perfection is just a cause.

A cause that we can never truly attain,

But that doesn't mean we should feel any shame.

For we are unique, one-of-a-kind,

And that's what makes us so divine.

We are beautiful in our own way,

And that beauty should never stray.

We should embrace our quirks and our quirks,

And love ourselves, flaws and all, without any smirks.

For self-love is the key to happiness,

And that's something that we should always address.

So let us love ourselves, every part,

And let us do it with an open heart.

For self-love is a gift we all should give,

And with it, we can truly live.

To what extent do you have affection for yourself?

M

ost individuals in this world seem to lack a solid self-identity and self-esteem. By self-love, I am not referring to fame, wealth, or material possessions that your negative thoughts may suggest. It is not linked to appearance, possessions, or any superficial aspects that might seem to enhance self-love.

It's about recognizing your self-worth. You should be able to declare, I don't need to associate with these individuals, be in these environments or situations, to recognize my value.

I value myself regardless of whether you appreciate me or not. I exist, and I have a purpose. I have confidence in my abilities, and I understand my significance. I am improving myself each day.

It's essential to love yourself as much as you love others. In particular, when you connect to the most authentic version of yourself, loving yourself has to come naturally and automatically. When you have low self-esteem, confidence, or self-perception, you cannot fully experience life. Therefore, developing self-love and changing your mindset, emotions, and overall perspective toward life is crucial.

Empower yourself to explore your true self, passions, and aspirations.

CAN YOU LOVE WITHOUT SELF-LOVE?

Believe it or not, when we fall in love with someone, it can be a slightly scary and unnerving experience when that person starts to reciprocate our feelings!

This is because one of the reasons we may fall in love with someone is due to a desire to escape our flaws, imperfections, and mediocrity by seeking refuge in the company of someone whom we perceive to be beautiful, perfect, and accomplished.

However, if that person were to start loving us back, we may feel discredited because their approval of us would suggest that they are not as divine or perfect as we had hoped.

This paradoxical situation highlights the tension between our desire to be loved and accepted by someone we admire and our deep-seated insecurities and self-doubts that make it difficult to believe we deserve such love and admiration.

Having a good relationship with another person requires a certain level of self-love and self-affection. This love and affection are typically built-up during childhood and form a legacy that allows us to believe that we deserve love and respect from others. Without this foundation of self-love, we may respond negatively or obtusely to the affections given to us by our adult partners.

In such cases, the love given to us may feel sickening or misguided, and we may self-destructively set out to repel or disappoint it, often unconsciously. This reaction is usually due to a lack of familiarity with love and affection, making us more comfortable with being disliked or ignored, as this is what we are accustomed to. Therefore, self-love is critical in building healthy and fulfilling relationships with others.

Ravi L Tewari rightly said - when we lack complete assurance in our ability to be loved, accepting affection can feel like being rewarded for something we don't believe we deserve.

Self-Love is the Foundation

Imagine William, who has very low self-esteem and lacks self-love. He constantly seeks validation from others and has a deep fear of rejection. He also tends to prioritize other people's needs, even if it costs his happiness and well-being.

William now enters into a romantic relationship with Sophia she deeply cares about. Initially, William feels a rush of excitement and joy, but as the relationship progresses, he starts to feel insecure and anxious. He becomes overly dependent on Sophia for validation and reassurance, fearing she will leave him.

As the relationship continues, William's lack of self-love burdens Sophia. She often feels overwhelmed by