All things come from God: Women in Training Vol 2, Part 1

By PhD Yogi Bhajan

Recognizing the need to educate women about women, Yogi Bhajan created a special summer intensive training program for women called Khalsa Women's Training Camp (KWTC). The women in training program took place in Española, NM, USA, during summer starting in 1976 and continued for twenty years. Every year he spent up to 8 weeks directly teaching

• Language: English
• Publisher: Kundalini Research Institute
• Release date: Aug 14, 2014
• ISBN: 9781934532201

PhD Yogi Bhajan

Yogi Bhajan was declared a Master of Kundalini Yoga at the age of 16. He came to the United States in 1969 and openly taught this transformative technology for the next 35 years, until his last breath in Aug 2004. In the turbulent drug culture of the 70s, Yogi Bhajan first reached out to the youth. He recognized that their experimentation with drugs and "altered states of consciousness" expressed a desire to experience themselves and a longing for family, for connection to their soul and their community. In response to this innate longing, he created a family known as 3HO (Healthy, Happy, Holy Organization). Soon, 3HO ashrams began springing up across the United States and throughout the world.He sparked a movement whose tendrils have woven their way into numerous aspects of our culture. Yoga and meditation have gained widespread acceptance in the West and the holistic health movement he introduced through diet, herbs, and lifestyle technologies. Born Harbhajan Singh in what is now Pakistan to a family of healers and community leaders, Yogi Bhajan studied comparative religion and Vedic philosophy in his undergraduate years and received his Masters in Economics with honors from Punjab University. Years later, he earned his Ph.D. in communications psychology from the University of Humanistic Studies in San Francisco. Yogi Bhajan emerged as a religious, community, and business leader with a distinguished reputation as a man of peace, world vision, wisdom, and compassion. He founded several food companies that manufacture and distribute natural products based on these teachings. He fostered economic development in communities around the world. He is also the author of several books on yoga philosophy, business, and communication during his lifetime.The Kundalini Research Institute continues his legacy through The Yogi Bhajan Library of Teachings, the International Teacher Training in Kundalini Yoga as taught by Yogi Bhajan®, and the publications of lectures and kriyas to serve the community of teachers, students, and practitioners around the world. See www.kundaliniresearchinstitute.org to learn how you can help keep the legacy alive!

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WHAT IS A WOMAN?

June 29, 1977

Today I am going to talk to you about certain things with which you may agree or disagree. It does not matter. From time immemorial, thousands and hundreds of thousands of people have lived their lives just experimenting with one thing: What is a woman? Do not be surprised. You can meet people who can tell you what is a God, but I would like to know the name of one person who has told you what a woman is. The situation is that because man is born out of the woman, he has never cared to learn what a woman is. His is a very fascinating personality. He is born of woman, he deals with woman, he marries woman, he has children out of woman, he dates woman, he is messed up with a woman, he wants to mess up woman a whole lot. Every action which you'll find man doing has a woman either under it, in back of it, in front of it, to the left of it, to the right of it, or above it. All dimensions are covered with a woman as they are covered with God. There is no difference. In Chalitra Shastra, there is one very beautiful line which I always remember. This sage says, That if you want to understand what maya is, understand it through a woman. There is another line which is very positive: If you want to see God, see It through a woman. Now all those statements are not understood by men of common calibre.

When you are told that you see the light through the woman that does not mean anything but one thing: that you see the transparent personality of the woman. When you deal with a woman, you deal with this flesh, these bones, these tantrums, these demands, these charms, these smiles, whatever it is. To be very honest with you, that is not what a woman is. Let me give you a very simple example. Suppose you walk on this road to Espanola, go to a restaurant there, sit down and happily meet a girl or woman; feel attracted to her, talk to her. She becomes friendly with you. You say, Hi, where are you from? From Espanola. You say, Oh, I am from Espanola, too. You are pretty. She says, Thank you, you are handsome. You say, Thank you. All that jazz. You think that that girl is from Espanola, I mean that that is a kid from Espanola and you ask her, Oh, have you ever been outside of Espanola? She says, No. Do you know anybody other than anybody? She says, Oh well, all I know is my father and my two brothers and one sister, then somebody in the town, and that's it. Do you visit anywhere? She says, Well, I visit the grocery store. Have you ever gone to the movies? She says, What is that? You talk to her about all these things and you find her a very simple dumb little thing. If that makes you happy, you are heading for unhappiness. Now, what happens? You think that little thing, that little woman, is great; you can handle her, she is simple, she is nice, she is a country woman. The only mistake you have to make is to give her this little pinkie (your little finger). The moment she holds it, she is going to talk about New York, and her European tour. That girl who used to live only in two dresses and never knew a third is going to say, What fashion is happening in Paris this year, or the year ‘82? All that is a woman. The greatest blunder men do is that they just see nothing.

This is a hand towel, right? If you look at this hand towel, you say, Oh, of course, it is a hand towel. I can wash my face with this face towel. Oh good. They just see nothing. This hand towel has all the cotton grown by the farmers and all the factories where it was made behind it. It has all the twisting and twining and coloring and marketing and jobbing, financing, banking, salesmen, corporations, organizations, taxes, government and what not. This is all hidden behind this little hand towel. Is that true or not? Have you ever looked at this hand towel like that? No? Why not? This hand towel is God. I am not kidding you. It is exactly God. It has a dimension, it has a structure, it has an essence, it has a usefulness. It can be anything, it can project anything. It has all the meaning and it has no meaning.

Whosoever you are, you are God. The past is gone, the future is not sure, but now

you are God. You are a creature, part of the creator. You want to beautify yourself. That is where the wrong comes in. You want to protect yourself, I agree with that. That is required. You need clothes, you need food, you need certain exercises. You need good things and this thing and that thing. Good things and bad things do not make any difference. The first principle required for a woman to understand herself is that she must accept very firmly that she is a woman and she is now

. This is called parkirtee

sodhan

. Parkirtee

means the creativeness of God. Sodhan

means to discipline, to clean out. You should clean out your consciousness in order to know you are a woman. Agreed? Understand? The second thing you must understand is you are a woman. When you write that, you should write like this: I AM - A - WOMAN. Do you know what that means? You are one of its kind. So, when you are one of its kind, remember that in the kingdom of the creativity of the Creator, there is no second thing ever created in the past, present or future like you. As a woman, when you want to become like another woman you are a mess. No woman by the capacity of the will of the Creator can be like another woman. Your moon cycle, your menstrual period, your emotions, your situation, your explorations, your mental capacity, your whole being is as you are. In other words, what I'm trying to say to you is that there is no assembly line system in the Kingdom of God. Look, God has been messing along with a lot of things but so far one thing has not happened. He cannot produce two human beings alike. There can be a possibility of similarity among men but it is impossible ever for Almighty God to produce two women alike because the creativity of the structural base has to be original. That is what divine is about.

Q. What happens with identical twins?

A. Identical twins can be born on the same day, but with totally different metabolism, different identities, and different destinies to cover. Their interlock is the electromagnetic field. That affects them but does not mean that the personalities are alike. The only identical situation of two identical twins will be that they will be at the same frequency of the electromagnetic field.

This is a science I am going to teach you; it has never been taught before. The most important thing in your life is your electromagnetic field and its frequency. For that you cannot look to anybody. When you are menstruating baby, you are menstruating. Nobody else is menstruating. Now you cover your menstruation. Do not expose yourself. You understand? When you are menstruating then your period is on; do not make someone else's period go off. You can be itchy, you can be tired. You may not be able to handle your position one hundred percent, during the menstruation period, one week before, one week after, and the five days inbetween. How many days does that come to? Actually your menstruation remains for three peak days. Seven plus seven plus five equals nineteen plus three equals twenty-two. Within those five days are the three heaviest days which are called the gross period time, top time, or we call it the ‘inward-you’. The inward-you-period is such a difficult period of your life that you must use a pad not just for the flow. That is one thing which has messed up all of you Americans. You only cover the flow and not the wind. The uterus must not have wind (take in air) at the time of heavy flow. Therefore, extra padding is required. You do not believe me. Let us not deal that way. You go one month the way you want to go and one month the way I'm telling you to go. It will cost you fifteen or twenty cents more for those few pads, but if in that peak period you can save yourself from the invent of the wind, you can save a lot of situations in your life. The second thing is that in those three days which is the gross period, your thighs from the knees to the navel point should be carefully warm. In those three days under no. circumstance should you lift any weight.

Those three days are top flow. Is that understandable? All right. Now comes the total five days. The limit of the period of the menstruation is five days. In five days remember not to have any quarrel, any fighting, any discussion which can cause you mental irritation. You know what the best formula for that is? If somebody is really getting on your back, just add five days to it and say I will talk to you after a week. He will understand it firmly. Do not let anybody exploit your handicap. Why? It is not a handicap that you should look silly to the world, that is not true. Those are five days where the system is going through changes within; you are too much within and not too much out. The balance is in and out. Those five days you are too much in. Those are the days to meditate, to do the japa

, to do good things and read from the holy books. Read the scriptures, read stories and put your mind in the positive terminologies. Whatever you will do for five days for the uplift of the soul, that is all the game. Understood? Now seven days before and seven days after, all women fall in a category. One is category A, one is category B. Some get upset seven days before; those who do not, get upset seven days after. You know why? Sometimes the metabolism-break upsets your system. Sometimes the metabolism-regain upsets your system. You have to understand the very mechanics of your body before your understand whether you are a Jew or a Christian, or a Sikh or a Muslim or a Buddist. Before you understand anything about yourself, try to understand what the machine is.

Q. What do you mean by break and regain?

A. It is a change in the metabolism, estrogen and the whole thing. Either it affects you in the first week or it affects you in the last week.

Q. Is that usually always the same? If it affects you before, will it always be before?

A. Either you fall in the first week category or the last week category. You cannot be in the last week category if you are in the first week category. It cannot happen. What I am saying is five days every month are meant to be very carefully watched by you. Seven days are for you to watch your behavior.

This is another thing I am telling you which is a very guarded secret. Whenever you are going to talk to a man, never extend out. Do you understand what I am saying? No. I know you do not; I know that. Let the man give you a call. It is called the call of the bull. Do not try to impress a man. When you try to extend yourself to impress a man that is where you lose the root, then you are weakest at your foundation. Once a woman in creativity is weaker at her foundation, she has no ground. I am explaining, I am explaining, don't worry. Mr. A is your husband. He walks in and says,Hi Rosie, how are you? Wow. I am back home. What are you doing? Oh, darling, you are not ready. She says,You did not phone me. Is there something we have to do? Oh yeah, I forgot. Oh my God. You know, I talked to Rosalina and her husband and we are going to go to a party, and we are going to do many things. Hurry up, hurry up, hurry up. Let's go, let's go, let's go. You know what that means? Tell me what that means. He is not in a position to confront you. He is not in a position to confront you for conscious or subconscious reasons. How should you act? It is simple. Ok, ok, ok, dear, hold on. I will be ready. Do you want me to get ready specially, or whatever I can do? He says, Hurry up. Do not worry, special, not special. Hurry up, let's go. Go with him. Let him order the food. Let him make you eat. Let him talk whatever he talks. Just take keen, direct, honest interest. Give him the chance to balance out. He has not come to you at that moment as a husband; he has come at that moment to just soak himself in your spirit. Your flesh is no good to him, your meat is no good to him, your head is no good to him. The only thing he needs at that time is the flow of your spirit. It can be your father, it can be your husband, it can be your brother, it can be your neighbor, it can be your friend, it can be anybody. The most important role of a woman is when the male needs the female energy. It will always happen without explanation. It will always happen suddenly. It will always be a shock for you. Aaaah, I was searching for you. What happened? I was in the house. No, no, no, I was going to go out. Oh, I forgot; come on, let's go, let's go, let's go. Have you seen those scenes? Out of the blue he jumps up out of the chair, Heeey, I want a party for you. You say the guy is crazy. It happens once in a while in life, not all the time, but it happens to every male.

Your flow of metabolism only changes around the menstruation period; men's metabolism changes all the time. They are the most freaky creatures on the planet earth. Oh, I meant human beings. I remember as a Yogi now, and I remember as a human being now, and I understand the difference when I was going through all these changes. I have totally studied it, and what the scriptures say is absolutely right. This is how the man goes, (indicates with his arms large curves up and down) and this is how woman goes, (indicates very small curves, almost a straight line with one large curve per month ). Have you seen how the Chinese walk? Just like that. That is how the woman goes. In the morning the man will paint a beautiful garden of roses; in the evening when he comes home he is as a dead soldier. When you deal with a man, you deal with a most unpredictable character. Now, with the entire unpredictability of the human being as a male, to give him a ground of life and happiness, woman has to be constant, continuous, and dependable; these things a man wants. No male, whether a king or a beggar can continue with an uncontinous woman.

I would like to explain to you this problem, because to begin with every male is uncontinuous. Now, an uncontinuous needs a continuous. When an uncontinuous gets in stride with another uncontinuous, there is a clash. If your male is outgoing, you should be outgoing and not feel tired. If you go out having fun and come back at eleven thirty, if he feels dead tired and wants a cup of tea, then he expects you to make it for him. You will ask why? Because he is highly insensitive. You know subconsciously what he feels? He feels you are the only energy; how can you be tired? No male ever feels that his beloved can ever get tired. When you tell him, I am tired, he is dead before that. Oh my God, you are tired. Honey, what happened to you? I have seen some even freak out. They go into a fit. I am telling you certain things which scriptures and sages have written over five thousand years before us. All the study has been already done. We are not going to discover something new, but simply I am going to tell you what it is so that you may know what it is and understand what it is. Perhaps you have forgotten; we have all forgotten.

When a male and a female deal in a relationship, he thinks you are the spirit. This is the only thing you forget. I will give you an example: Once a male-husband…you know today there are female-husbands, so I am using a very particular word; I am an old-timer, that is alright. Once a male-husband wanted to go out and take his wife along. The wife took a stand that she is not going, and he should not go, but if he wants to insist, then he can go and she will not. They have a big fight and finally he says, Hell, I am going! She says, Thank you, I have already packed for you and here is fifty dollars extra. What do you mean by extra? She says, Well, if you would have taken me, you would have spent all that money; you are going to spend about three hundred, and we are going to shop three hundred. Going with you, I would have been six hundred short; as it is, I am saving five hundred fifty. The same male after six months, one day lying down on the sofa, said, You are great, So-and-so. She said, Why? He said, I wish I had not gone. You know, I am very proud of you. You took a stand, you did your best, and now I remember I did a false thing. It was wrong on my part. Men do not love a dumb woman. Neither do men love a depressed woman. You can lean on a man but not with a depressed mood. When you lean on a man, he feels the energy and he feels the fulfillment that once in a human life he is doing something. Men are very dedicated. In one of the scriptures, when the sage is advising the woman, he says,Look my charming beauty of the God quote, unquote, Look my charming beauty of the God, you are living with a man where your body is transparently radiant and his radiance has a sheet under it which is rice paper. Now you know how delicate rice paper is? Behind the ego of the male there is a layer of rice paper. It is opaque and kind of rough. Therefore, basically, it is in the habit of the male to lean on the woman. When you make him feel great, and you lean on him, that does not mean he accepts you as dumb, weak, and frustrated. He accepts you as a capacity in which he can do something. When you make him do something, he feels very loving, very grateful, very cozy towards you.

Your problem is you think that if you fall apart on the road, and he has to carry you on a stretcher, that is your

achievement. Do you know what I am saying? Sometimes you pretend you are tired and sometimes you are actually tired. Do you understand? You pretend so many times, that when you are actually tired, no man believes it. You do not explain yourself. It is required of the woman to deal with a man in direct, straight communication. It takes about three months of this habit to take up the style. Such as, Honey, we are bored, both of us, it is boring, this is a boring evening, what should we do? You just say, Get bored more. What do you mean, get bored more? Nonsense, should we not go to a movie? Darling, six dollars, three dollars on the gas, that is nine dollars, going and wasting four hours does not mean a thing to me. The budget does not permit it. We are happily bored. This is all it takes to make him laugh, and he will come and kiss you,Oh, you are sweet. You are really always counting pennies. But dear, they are your pennies.

No claim, no blame-- that is the art of a woman. The science of the woman is: always keep the spirit going. The art of a woman is: never claim anything and you will never get blamed for anything. If you want to live rich and be taken care of do not claim anything. It is in the nature of the man that if he relates to a woman he cannot see her as ugly, because nobody can feel the flow of bad things. Would you like your garden not to be tip-top? Would you like that your living room not be ok? It is the nature of the male that if he is allowed to play the game, he will be your caretaker. The only mess in the situation is when you demand it. When you demand it, he gets confused. You know why? He is not intelligent enough to know what to give. He only knows intelligently what to take. Do you understand? He was born out of you, he sucked your blood out of you into milk and lived on it, he used you to make you nurse him. Then affectionately he wants to grow and he demands that you should teach him every trick of the trade of life. He wants you to make him spiritual, decent, affectionate, intelligent, what-not. All he knows is take, take, take, take, take, take, take. The moment you ask him to give he says, What? Then when you want to go to a movie why do you yell and scream at that idiot and tell him,You never take me out! I do not know what you are doing. When I dated with you, you would take me everywhere. Now that we are married, we have gotten sloppy. Just get up, dress up and say, Darling let me take you to a good movie tonight, because all he knows is how to take. He is going to pay for it. You are not going to get hurt. Just go along with the stream, the flow; it is the flow to give. Give him a bad time, he will take it, but give him a good bad time. Bibi-ji has started coming to the lectures. I do not know if she attended all these lectures what would happen to me, but the last season she did not show up, so it is ok. (Bibi-ji: I was in India. I was not here.) So the problem is — I am just explaining to you the trend of the natural flow. The trend of his natural flow is take, take, take, take, take, and your flow is give, give, give. So use every taking and blend it to the form of giving. Give him a bad time, give him a good time, give him good food, give him good advice, give him a good joke, whatever you want to give him; just put it in such a way that it looks giving, not taking. You understand this trick?

Question: Someone once told me that several men got together to decide what to do when a woman has her period. They decided that the thing to do was to tell her to go rest In the room and tell them what to bring her.

Answer: Oh yea. That person must have been beaten up in the last week by his wife. You know, once I told a husband to stop doing this something. He said, Do I have to? I said, You are so beaten up there is not a single hair on your head. What more do you want? These two persons are such a combination that you can study any combination of any lock, but not these two. When he is very cheerful, she pretends she does not know what happiness is. When he is sad, she dresses up so marvelous. Whenever I visit the ashram, when I see her absolutely spotless, flawless, dressed up, I immediately know I have to console the husband. First thing I say, Hey boy, you seem to be great this evening. He says, Yes, sir, and I know.

That is how the coverage is. This is called coverage; this is the second chapter. Coverage. Cover your man. It is not covering the man when you align with him for wrong things. Covering the man is to cover the man for every right thing and to cover him so that he does not do anything wrong. He will always be grateful to you. This is the total sum.

what is a woman? Woman is the flowing river of spirit. On its bank dwells a male, a man. Do you understand this? If the flow of that river, that spirit, that woman is clean, healthy, constant, the dweller shall not leave the dwelling. That dwelling will turn itself into a city, a town, a capitol, and what not. Have you understood? Alright. Now you can ask me any question you like and I would like to answer.

Question: Why is it that when my husband is in a bad or depressed mood I feel wonderful, and as soon as I pull him up I am depressed and in a bad mood, and we go back and forth in a day or by the week?

Answer: Yeah. That is sometimes. There was a man. He saw a very thirsty man and that man was dying. The dying man was by the side of a well. So this man came fast and put the bucket in and let the thing go, go, go. Finally it got to the water and he pulled, pulled.it, pulled it. out By the time he got the water/of the bucket and put it on this dying man, who opened his mouth, had a couple cups of water and got back his strength, the guy was so tired because of all the pulling, that he fell on him and killed him. When you pull him out, you feel you have done a job and then you want a reward. When you want a reward it is just taking. When he knows you are taking, he goes beserk. It is called inter-exchange. In this position of behavior, you are the only one who has to give in. He cannot. He does not have the capacity. I am sorry; men do not have the capacity to give in. When he is depressed, you pull him out, right?

What is your husband? You sleep with him. Whenever you sleep with a man which is a husband or you have a sexual relationship with a man, do not mother him. There is a distinct difference between these two institutions, wife and mother. A mother is never a wife, and a wife is never a mother. A wife is a mother of your born. She cannot be your mother. When you start mothering the husband, you pollute the relationship. Do you know what mothering a man is? This is when the flow of the river spreads out and spaces out of its bank and floods the city, and puts the mud in every living room. If the river does it every third day, how many people live on the bank of that river? Mother the whole world but for one man which is called your husband. He married you to get rid of his mother! Do you understand? When he married you, he thought he was through with the mom and then he thinks he has married another mom. You know how depressed he can be? Do you realize that?

Question: During those seven days before and after our period, is there a technology for us to deal with our emotions and our moods?

Answer: Yeah. It is very simple. Just know your emotions and mood. That is all a woman has to do. A woman can never be a woman if she does not know her flow of spirit and her mood, and how it is affecting her. She must understand that her body and mind are very, very near. Woman as an instrument is very sensitive.

Question: You said that when a woman is having her period she should not expose herself. On one level, do you mean not to tell anyone, in a way?

Answer: No, no, no, not telling anybody. When you are in the menstruating period, your metabolism is going through changes. Right? There is no harm just explaining that to somebody. Do not say, I am sick. There is no use saying that. Just say, This work I will do after a week.

It is that simple. Everybody will understand it.

Question: How do you handle it when you are at a point where you are feeling very vulnerable, and your husband always picks that time to give you a hard time?

Answer: Oh yes, I know that. I have gone through it for twenty-four years. When you are very vulnerable and he picks that time and is coming right on, just let him pass by. Do not react. If you do it three times to him, the fourth time he will dare not. It only means three successful attempts; then he knows. Man has a very fluctuating ego. He knows that the first time he failed, the second time he failed, the third time he failed, and if he grants himself a fourth time, he will fail, so he will never do that. Three sensitive controls of time can take you out of the problem. It something makes me angry I always do one thing; I put that thing which makes me angry to a stop. I always walk out of the situation. I have seen and I have tested. As a yogi I can control myself and go up and down through anything. I also studied through my controls, human fluctuation of behavior. In sensitivity it is highly important that you as individuals, when you know that somebody is trying to pick a fight with you and you have no ground to get out of it, just tell him, Will you please do me a favor? He will say, What? Can we not fight day after tomorrow after twelve thirty? What is he going to say? No, I want to fight now. Say, I am not ready. You will not lose a thing.

Question: What is the best way to deal with a man's depression or his negativity.

Answer: The best way to deal with man's depression is hot milk. Yeah that is practical. You must know what his favorite drink is other than booze and all that jazz. Some people love milk, some people love these teas, some love some juice, some like this. There is a dish in the life of every man which he likes the most. If you do not find that dish, you do not know what to do in depression. Just shut up, go and make that dish and put it on the table. The very smell of it! Whenever Nirinjan Kaur gets depressed because of overwork, or frustration, the very smell of spaghetti brings her out of it. You know Premka Kaur? Anytime she has a good salad with a good dressing, she is perfect.