Depth, Dimension and Direction: Women in Training Vol 5

By PhD Yogi Bhajan

Recognizing the need to educate women about women, Yogi Bhajan created a special summer intensive training program for women called Khalsa Women's Training Camp (KWTC). The women in training program took place in Española, NM, USA, during summer starting in 1976 and continued for twenty years. Every year he spent up to 8 weeks directly teaching

• Language: English
• Publisher: Kundalini Research Institute
• Release date: Jun 18, 2015
• ISBN: 9781934532218

PhD Yogi Bhajan

Yogi Bhajan was declared a Master of Kundalini Yoga at the age of 16. He came to the United States in 1969 and openly taught this transformative technology for the next 35 years, until his last breath in Aug 2004. In the turbulent drug culture of the 70s, Yogi Bhajan first reached out to the youth. He recognized that their experimentation with drugs and "altered states of consciousness" expressed a desire to experience themselves and a longing for family, for connection to their soul and their community. In response to this innate longing, he created a family known as 3HO (Healthy, Happy, Holy Organization). Soon, 3HO ashrams began springing up across the United States and throughout the world.He sparked a movement whose tendrils have woven their way into numerous aspects of our culture. Yoga and meditation have gained widespread acceptance in the West and the holistic health movement he introduced through diet, herbs, and lifestyle technologies. Born Harbhajan Singh in what is now Pakistan to a family of healers and community leaders, Yogi Bhajan studied comparative religion and Vedic philosophy in his undergraduate years and received his Masters in Economics with honors from Punjab University. Years later, he earned his Ph.D. in communications psychology from the University of Humanistic Studies in San Francisco. Yogi Bhajan emerged as a religious, community, and business leader with a distinguished reputation as a man of peace, world vision, wisdom, and compassion. He founded several food companies that manufacture and distribute natural products based on these teachings. He fostered economic development in communities around the world. He is also the author of several books on yoga philosophy, business, and communication during his lifetime.The Kundalini Research Institute continues his legacy through The Yogi Bhajan Library of Teachings, the International Teacher Training in Kundalini Yoga as taught by Yogi Bhajan®, and the publications of lectures and kriyas to serve the community of teachers, students, and practitioners around the world. See www.kundaliniresearchinstitute.org to learn how you can help keep the legacy alive!

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Naam Simran:

Concept of Grace

June 29, 1980 (Gurdwara)

The concept of grace is the concept of Naam simran. People who commit disgraceful acts do not know what Naam simran is. Grace is Truth, and Naam simran creates the Truth. This is not understood by a lot of people. I'll tell you why. Suppose the land is bad and nothing will grow. If I go to a nursery and pick out a beautiful, healthy plant and start watering it, it will survive for a while with that earth around it. But without further nurturing it, it will start dying. Similarly, Truth needs total and complete feeding because it is ultimate. It is infinity. That is why Guru has said:

Aad sach, jugaad sach, haibhee sach,

Nanak hosee bhee sach.

True in the beginning, True throughout time,

True now, Nanak says it shall ever be True.

Guru Nanak (1)

If you do keertan, you teach Truth, you teach Gurbaanee, the many things you all do. Such things are wonderful. You have a raihat. You may be the true disciples of Guru Gobind Singh, but if you lie once, you have done it. Similarly, if you take all the vitamins — vitamin C, vitamin E, rice bran syrup, and everything else, it still takes only one pill of potassium cyanide to kill you. I'm not kidding with you, you animals. I am truthfully in pain because you have not understood the grace of a human life. Human life is very graceful. It's not part of the animal kingdom. It is not meant for sex and for sensuality. It is for a graceful radiance. Where this radiance is, it shines. Wherever we are, if we are radiant, so our children will be and our surroundings. If the earth is good and the plant is put there, it will grow and bear fruit.

Remember one thing: hyprocisy can occur in every religion and it may occur in you because you come from the soil of hypocrisy. You are very subject to that hypocrisy. The only thing which can save you is saadhanaa. Every ambrosial hour that you get up and cleanse and purify yourself, you remove your dust and you become ready again to conquer the day. Life has to be conquered day by day, but not by lying, cheating, or being sensually deceitful.

I once saw something which stunned me. There were four very beautiful keertanee jathaas, and they had a fight over the time allotted them. One said, "If I cannot give my keertan from one o'clock to two o'clock, I am not going to do it at all. I asked a Gursikh, What is this? Are we singing the hymns of the Guru in the presence of the Guru, in the court of the Guru? Or are we singing for people? If you have to do keertan for people, go to Broadway." We come to the Gurdwara to do only one thing. We listen here only to receive one thing. We watch here only to receive one thing. We do everything here to receive the real blessing of the Guru. It's a yoga, a union between a Sikh and his Guru. We form a congregation, a Raaj Yog of the holy order of the Khalsa. In Gurdwara keertan which is done to amuse people is not received in the heavens. Keertan helps you to concentrate, to meditate on the Guru.

Naam simran helps to connect you with the Guru. If Naam simran helps you tell lies, be a hypocrite, do wrong deeds, then it is not Naam simran; it is the word of an egomaniac, and he shall be condemned to hell without his knowledge. We in America who have chosen this path have to understand that we have chosen it at a time when we are going to be tested. Our steel shall be tested, therefore don't be influenced, dear brothers and sisters, by those hypocrites who sell God, who talk about God to create their own influence. God is an influence in Itself which nobody can create. Guru is a way to salvation in Itself. Nobody can do more than that. All one can do is to be pure at heart and sing the praise of the Lord so that it will affect all the hearts which are pure and cleanse all hearts which are impure.

Naam simran is not a technology. It is alive, clear, resounding and it shall ever be. Naam simran is a state of mind in which Guru sits in the heart. It is not baikharee (repetition with the tongue). Naam simran is (unstruck sound), anhad, therefore we must not understand it in a misleading way. Unfortunately today you put the musicians' area on the left side of the Guru instead of on the right. It was an innocent mistake, and I think you should make innocent mistakes once in a while so they can be corrected.

I remember one day I chanted Naam, and it took no more than a minute to enjoy it. It was not a physical sensation. Unfortunately most people in the world need addictions to get to the stage of being physical allurement to the Naam. Yogis do, swamis do, saints do, and many of the Sikhs do, too. Naam is not an allurement and it is not physical. Because it conquers the physical, it cannot be physical. It is a radiation of the little soul in you, which totally overwhelms all senses. If you ever chant the Naam and you feel it with the senses, you are not chanting the Naam. It is better to do rock and roll. I am saying it clearly so that tomorrow our children may not misunderstand about Naam simran. I want you to brick a wall now so that our children will not be bricked alive in the falsehood of the time. Naam is above senses, not within the senses. Remember that. And no physical karma can personify the Naam.

Please remember that it is from a sense of duty that beauty arises. That is why when somebody told me yesterday, I have been doing saadhanaa and nothing has happened to me.

I said, Thank God nothing happens to you.

He said, What?

I said, Each day when you do saadhanaa, nothing happens. But you don't go out of greed, you go just to conquer the soul, your laziness, your ego, your unsmartness, with your essence of commitment. That's all saadhanaa is. We don't go there to get anything. Fools do that.

There is a story of a very great Sufi. His mother used to put honey and bread under his prayer rug, so when he was meditating and he felt hungry, he would raise the rug and find a beautiful honey bread. One day he came back and he brought the honey bread with him and his mother said, What happened? You didn't eat your honey bread. He said, Mother, thank you very much, but today I meditated. I had the sweetness of the honey bread in me.

In every congregation, there are little rats. They are not human beings, they are little rats and they want attention. Then there are little cats; they come to the congregation to sleep. Then there are little monkeys; they come to the congregation to jump. Then there are little elephants; they walk into the congregation to have space. And there are little horses in the congregations who create a lot of hoof and a lot of sounds. But in every congregation there are a few Gursikhs who humbly come, humbly bow, and become the humble of the humble of the humble, and God comes to receive them in the congregation. And because of them everybody is illuminated. This concept of virle ke-ee ke, few and far between, is very true.

Wherever Guru says "Aad sach, jugaad sach, haibhee sach, naanak hosee bhee sach, Truth will triumph. We come here to be blessed. We come here to be graceful. We have not walked on the path of the Guru for money or for anything materialistic. Rather we have walked on the path of the Guru only to enjoy that moment in life when God blesses us and fills our souls. It's a relationship.

Too(n) gur prasaad kar raaj jog.

(By Guru's Grace you shall enjoy Raaj Yog.)

Guru Arjan (211)

Be royal. Be the king of kings, and if at that time you feel like the king of kings, then your soul is enriched by the Infinite Soul which we call God. And then we say, "Wahe Guru." That is really saying "Wahe Guru." That is the grace of Wahe Guru, when we realize, feel, and understand.

Many of you, truthfully, may like to eat cookies, but cookies are never a meal. There are some people who are mentally sick, who block the Truth. It is their karma. But we should keep on saying, for the benefit of those who can feel inspired to understand that the main meal is the relationship between the soul and the soul in itself, into the infinity of the solidarity of the union of that comprehensive radiance, into the polarity, when there is no vacuum, and one-ness is received, achieved, experienced, and enjoyed. If you cannot, try to reach that stage, please try. It's beautiful, it's wonderful, it's very enchanting, and it is beyond all paraphernalia. All personal paraphernalias are useless, the very touch of that stage is the final achievement of human life. That is the state available to those who do real Naam simran, but not Naam simran for ego, for show or to deceive other people. Naam simran is a continuous, twenty-four-hour state of mind in which truth within and truth without is experienced and experimented with. Blessed is the life of a teacher who tests his students, and blessed are the students who are tested on_the touchstone of this state of mind.

Wahe Guru ji ka Khalsa, Wahe Guru ji ki Fateh¹.

2

Woman:

The Fountain of Man

June 30, 1980

The idea of this course is different than the ideas we have dealt with in previous courses. According to the atmosphere and the stars in the heavens, we in the United States of America may face a very rough time from 1984 to 1986. It could be anything from a holocaust to nothing at all. Our prayer is that we accomplish whatever we have to accomplish and at the same time prepare ourselves for whatever might come. And the best way a person can prepare himself is to get in touch with his spirit, his flow. I will try to tell you about the basic concept and communication of preparedness for a woman so that you may think about it and adapt it rather than bug me that I laid a number on you. I don't care if you accept something, reject something, like something or dislike something. Over and above everything, think about things.

The question is very simple and I'll put it in a simple way: Are we born. to suffer? It's a simple question. And the answer is simple. No. Then the question arises: why do we suffer? Again the answer is very simple: because we forget the pivotal power, the central power, the fulcrum power of our divinity, and our divine concept, which is God: G-O-D. God is the generating power, the organizing power, and the destroying power. So, if we don't organize what we generate or create, it will destroy us. If there is a heat, the wind will rise, the cold air will blow, and the rain will follow. It is called the law of the cycle. When we do not organize, we create destruction. On this planet, everything which God has created is organized. The sun, the mighty sun, which guarantees life, rises on time and sets on time. The moon waxes and wanes on time. You will not find anything creative, constructive, which is not on time. I can tell you what is off-time: earthquakes, volcanic erruptions, unpredicted storms. These are all destructive forces. Snow storms and avalanches are off-beat, off-time, off-balance — messengers of destruction. What do humans have? Anger, attachment, sensuality, greed. In our calibre, they are nothing but unpredictable phenomena.

By sensual and sexual projection, by attachment and depression, by insecurity and manipulation, ninety-nine percent of women suffer. The idealistic and basic concept of a woman is to be the spirit. Her effect should be soothing. Her communication should be inspiring; her values should be committed. You will never find a single man who will come to you and shall not seek you physically, mentally, and

spiritually. To be satisfying physically and not mentally is no good. To be satisfying mentally and physically but not spiritually is no good either. A woman has to be satisfying and she has to have three intercourses at three levels at the same time: physical, mental, and spiritual. Physically, she should be very charming; mentally, she should be very communicatively pleasing; and spiritually, she should be very uplifting. Otherwise, she should declare herself sick and tell him she is not available. He should give her a foot massage and take care of her. Do you understand these few words?

Man, by nature, charges and recharges himself, but his entire relationship with woman is based on the alert mind. And the alert mind, whether it flirts or not, never loses its base. Therefore, the communicative conception of a woman is: She is, she is; he is, he is; she is, he is. He is basically what she is. I know you don't understand it. I'll give you an example: A man comes home and he becomes very angry, very mad. Can you tell me why? There are three reasons: Either his ego was hurt while he was out, or his ego is hurt because of you, or he is afraid his ego may be hurt. All of these things will make a man angry. If a man knows that his girlfriend has called the house, and his wife knows it, and she says, Well, there is a telephone call I want to talk to you about. It may have only been an office call, but he will immediately think it was the girlfriend's call. What call? What call? I am busy, don't talk to me! I don't want to talk to you. There are always calls! When i come home, I receive lots of calls! What call are you talking about? She says, John, cool off. You know what I'm talking about. I'm just scared. I'm tired. I'm sick. I come home and you don't give me a drink; you don't give me food. You don't want to make love. All you talk about is telephone calls. What telephone call?! Now this is the normal behavior of a man. The guy is scared, that's all. If you tell him at that time, Well, such and such girl, Carolene, called, you'll have a fire. Have your fire then; enjoy your Fourth of July. All men are like that with one exception. Guess! A dead man. That is the only exception. Bio-chemically, psycho-analytically, centrifugally, personally, religiously or mentally, all men are constructed to react.

Life should be lived in a very simple way.

Simro(h) simar simar sukh paavo(n). 1

Guru Arjan (262).

It is in Sukhmani.2 I would like you to remember the word, simmer: S-I-M-M-E-R. Simro means to meditate. Simar simar sukh paavao(n). Don't translate it, just read it in English. Simar means to simmer, sukh means happiness, and paavo(n) means to obtain it.!

Life has to be that way: slow and simple. A certain amount of heat should always be there. For example, when we air-condition our house in the summer, we set the temperature gauge at sixty-five degrees because that is the temperature we need. In the winter, we need the same, but to counter-balance the outside temperature, we set the heater at seventy-five degrees, so that we get at least sixty-five degrees inside. The ideal continuity of heat in winter is to prevent the home from becoming too cold. Just so, every relationship in our concept has to be prevented from becoming ice. If it becomes ice, it will become powder; then it will become totally glassy and then it will crack. This applies to every living concept of life.

In relationships, in one's personality, and personally, sex doesn't play any part. Sex is the outlet of the inlet of the balance of energy which needs to be balanced out. But in the Western Hemisphere, including Europe, sex is used as an art of communication rather than as an art of relaxation. When sex is used that way, it is very dangerous. However, when it is used as an art of relaxation it is highly, extremely fruitful, and this is what is called creative sex. The concept of creative sex is very potent, very enchanting, and very relevant. The concept of communicative sex is very shallow, very temporary, very low in esteem and very irritating. It leaves one very itchy. What do you want? Sex! Sex! Come on. come on, come on, you dog! Come, come, come. Have it! Get it! Have you heard this kind of fighting? I heard it on the telephone. On the one hand a woman was yelling and screaming at her husband, on the other hand she was calling me on the phone and yelling and screaming at me. She was totally hysterical. I asked him what he had done to her, and he answered, Nothing. I just put by hand on her shoulder.

Communicative sex can be so provoking sometimes that it can totally misfire. Sometimes it is totally endangering, but mostly it is nonproductive both physically and mentally. In the physical realm, if you conceive, the experience shall stay with you. Mentally, you consider it a job which you have to do. Internally you are left in turmoil with a feeling of rudeness, of being used and abused; feeling that it is unnatural and unclear, that you have to do it. And you ask yourself why you have to do it, and many other things. But if it is creative and not communicative, then there is happiness, then that union is divine, that sex is pure. Old writings say, When a female attracts a man out of virtue, and out of that happiness cohabitation takes place, even the angels feel blessed. How are you going to learn that concept? You want to stimulate yourself with a cup of coffee, do the job and get it over with.

The communicative concept of a woman is threefold. First, she should be extremely, divinely organizing. The organizing capacity is divine; everything God has created is in a circle, so everything is complete in shape and form. Secondly, she should be absolutely smooth and constant and she should be as she should be. Thirdly, she should be available and reliable. That is called a foundation of personality. In your concept as a woman, if you cannot develop a foundation of personality, you will never reach reality, you will always fight with duality and you will never develop your personality. It is extremely important, not only for you, but for your children, your husband, your neighbors, your enemies, your friends, society, the country, and for the nation that you have a foundation to your personality, that you may be exactly, accurately predictable. A fluctuating woman is not a personality responsible to her own creativity, therefore her concept as a woman is wrong when she manipulates. Manipulation by the psyche is one aspect of an inwardly, fundamentally, non-predictable personality.

It may be hard at first for you to understand how to be straightforward, but if you really want to understand the divinity of your own personality and in reality want to get rid of duality, then you have to do a very simple act and that is to be straight. You be you. Any physical cohabitation or lovemaking or talking or applied sensuality or sexuality, whether through form, words, gestures or environments in which sexual capacity is used as an art of communication is highly dangerous because it will have a tremendous reaction. Communicate as you have to communicate. Don't use sex as a communicative link in a relationship. It is not only dangerous, but it will be reactive, rejective, destructive and finally it will break up the relationship.

You think that every man is an ego-maniac and a sex animal but that is not true. A man wants to relate to you on three levels; to receive spiritual upliftment, mental satisfaction, and physical companionship. If you cannot uplift him spiritually, divorce may not come for eighteen years, but it is on its way.

You may wonder why it is up to the woman to do all this. Ask God. I don't have an answer to that. That is just how those freaks, men, are. He created them that way. They don't menstruate. They are very bitter, very itchy, and respondingly very reactive. Their nervous systems are very sensitive and reactive.

A beautiful story in old writings tells of a princess who was with her lover. While moving and rolling around and doing whatever she was doing, she was reaching the point at which a certain physical situation seemed to be inevitable. She remembered that according to her moon cycle she was fertile, and that if anything went wrong with the sky over and the grass under, pregnancy would end up a simple possibility. She immediately knew through her mental communicative intelligence what to do. She said to the prince, Look at the moon please.

He said, No, no, you are my moon.

She said, No, no, there is something dangerous I am seeing in the moon.

He said, No, no, you are very beautiful; you are wonderful; I want to look at you.

She said, Wait, wait. Look at the moon. There is something in the moon I want to show you.

He looked at the moon and said, What? The moon is beautiful.

She said, Look at that cloud and keep looking until it passes over the moon. There is a special formation you will see by which my father, the King, used to predict whether there was going to be a war or not. He could predict whether it would be horrible, horrifying, have a lot of murder, whether we would be defeated or we would win. That was it! All that heat went into cold storage. Now this is a communicative tactic. She used and applied a tactic but she did not reject him, get up, or say, Wait a minute! I am in a dangerous part of my cycle! I want nothing to do with you and you may have nothing to do with me! If she would have been an American she would have done that.

You are a woman whether you are American, Indian, Japanese, Thai or Chinese. All of you get pregnant during your ovulation period and men do not remember their calendar. No man has yet been born who remembers the calendar. The calendar was made for women, not for men. Why do you rely on them for something which was not meant for them? Why should they even have a calendar? The majority of men, when asked first thing in the morning what day of the week, or what month or year it is, will give wrong answers. Don't be very devious about it; just ask him, Ji, what month is this? And he will say, You've not yet gone to ladies camp, therefore it must be April. That is how intelligent they are. That includes all men: your husband, your father, your brother, your spiritual teacher, and your divine God and Guidance. I wish today you could be Hazareth Abraham's wife asking the questions. There is a story that Hazarath Abraham was so truthful that he never knew how to tell a lie. When he returned from Egypt he met his girlfriend who was very young and pretty. His wife asked him, Did you meet her?

He said, Yes.

Why? she asked.

He said, Because she asked me to.

Episodes of jealousy and insecurity, of men flirting around and doing all that, have occurred from time immemorial to today. Whom do you want to blame? These men? Men creatively do not have an impulsive, restrictive personality. If woman does not develop it, it will never be developed. It is called a biological ethical response. Therefore, in the creative nature of circumstances, we've come to the conclusion that if you want to relate to a man, you must uplift him spiritually, satisfy him through your mental communication, and be very charming physically.

In this country physical charm has been turned over to the cosmetic industry which controls standards of physical beauty. But that is not the kind of beauty I am talking about. Actually, cosmetic display creates a barrier between a woman and man. If a man sees a woman without cosmetics after seeing her very cosmetically made up, he may sometimes get a tremendous subconscious reaction. That is why the Jews have a basic religious tenet that a Jewish woman will not show her hair to any male other than her spouse. Jewish women only untie their hair when they are being inviting to their husbands. If a Jewish woman does not untie her hair at home it is a signal to her husband to keep off limits. This is an example of signal language, a manner of communication used between the male and female, to ensure a graceful approach and reapproach.

What we are trying to cover today is the very basic concept of a woman. Woman is the fountain that develops the male into the greenery of the blossom and helps him to reach completion of fruition. It is the nursing of humanity, provided psychologically, biologically and spiritually, if in the centripedal and centrifugal force her magnetic field not only correlates or integrates but creates a rhythmical magnetic field in growth and in combination with the male concept. That's all I wanted to say to you. I would like you to take what I have said, extend it, enlarge it, and understand it. It is the key formula for the creation of a successful concept of woman.

STUDENT: Sir, I've heard some concern on the part of various people about what you in fact said at Winter Solstice about the correctness of bearing children in the next five years or so.

REPLY: Yes, I would like to cover this later; it is a full day's subject. I would like to take two or three days. It will be about the child and the concept of the child and relationship behaviors: interperverted relationships, direct relationships, over excessive relationships, interrelated relationships, over-perverted relationships, etc. There are about twenty or twenty-seven facets of it. I would like to complete it.

STUDENT: My question was more related to whether or not it's an appropriate time to get pregnant and bear children.

REPLY: Well, that is what I would like to discuss later. If 1984 is the critical year we still have three years. The child will be walking then if you get pregnant today, right? Things need to be smooth. But you are in ladies camp. Sorry. You have a good kid. Why don't you make a great man out of him? That's enough.

STUDENT: I was wondering what is the difference between Har and Haree?

REPLY: Har is the creative self of God by sound. Haree is the flow of the creative self of God for creativity.

STUDENT: What difference would that make in the meditation?

REPLY: One is the Self, one is the creative self. And it is the combination in the eighth lock. It is very valuable; it brings lots of happiness.

STUDENT: Sir, is it ever appropriate for a woman to help a man other than her husband out of a depression?

REPLY: Provided it is not indirectly sensually or sexually motivated and the psyche of the magnetic field is not involved even for a trace of it. Neither should it be done if it looks bad publicly or with the idea that you need to be compensated for that act which you are doing to another man other than your husband.

STUDENT: Last year you said that if after intercourse you were grouchy, then there was something wrong. What if the husband is grouchy? What's wrong then?

RELY: The male and female who feel grouchy or inconvenient or unrelaxed after cohabitation have not developed the correct and accurate signal to begin the act. Direct or indirect pressure when applied to create a communicative intercourse and not a constructive intercourse will always result in an uneven experience. I won't word it unhapy but I will say uneven.

STUDENT: What variety of things do men try to communicate through sex?

REPLY: There are many things. Basically, when the reapproachment to the central magnetic nucleus of the female is projected through her auric body, it penetrates through the pranic body and reaches the male, that state of communication is the most healthy development and very creative for physical enjoyment. There is nothing irrational about it. It brings to you purity, adjustment, thoughtfulness, kindness, constructiveness, and oneness — temporarily.

STUDENT: Are you talking about communicating things like anger and frustration…

REPLY: Yes, anger and frustration in a male and female occur to a degree when their co-relationship is of ego, of conquering or mastering one another. There is no reason for anger or frustration, fear or depression to exist in a relationship between a male and a female. All these quarrels you are having at home are just ego conflicts. If you analyze any quarrel in the household, no rational benefit comes out of it. Nothing. Never. They are just dust storms of the ego. They are caused by the unpredictability of the female, and the male takes advantage of it. Anger or fights in a house are just like earthquakes or volcanic eruptions. Teasing and taunting and yelling and screaming are like Mount St. Helen's erupting and creating a lot of dust and storm. It is ridiculous. It is not a quality of human life. You yell and scream at your husband and after twenty minutes he says, What did you say? Men do not understand that kind of behaviour. How can you reach a heart if when you speak one's head hurts? Communication has to be very gentle.

STUDENT: Is it all right to communicate coziness and affection to one another through sex?

REPLY: That is what sex is. Otherwise it is a steam engine, except instead of on a railway it happens on the bed. And that is the most dangerous and perverted sex you can ever indulge in. Without affection it is terrible. In English that is simply called rape. In California it is not legal.

STUDENT: Is there one most effective technique that we can use…

REPLY: Yes. For every man there is a perfect technique. Rub his stomach inside-out and his brain will give in to you. What one sweet cookie can do for a male, thirty miles of an affectionate walk cannot accomplish.

STUDENT: What do we do to still our ego?

REPLY: Ego is a simple territorial license plate given by God to every person to protect his own interest. But when the motivation is towards a joint interest and the energy meets and flows towards that, life is very harmonious, with or without sex. It is a basic concept of every relationship. When we motivate ourselves to reach a goal and we plan that goal now, then there is no conflict or ego. A conflict of ego occurs only when our goal is not vivid, or it is not well-defined, or our planning is wrong and we are unpredictable.

STUDENT: When a man is angry because his ego has been hurt by someone or by you or he's afraid it will be…

REPLY: A glass of lassi (a liquid yogurt drink) will do. A cold, cold lassi with very crunchy ice in it and lots of honey can take care of it. Just tell him, You are right, I am sorry, it is the Will of God, and give him a glass of lassi. Give the devil something to eat so that he can shut up. Put a carrot in his mouth. Do something funny. Get him out of your aura. Once a man is angry, his reasoning and his brain stop working. Anger is very, very limiting to every man. They become tinier and tinier and tinier.

STUDENT: Will that work for a man who stops talking when he gets angry?

REPLY: Yes. When a man stops talking, turn on the fan, and open up the windows. You must understand that fundamentally and biologically man is very limited, therefore his capacity to control his anger is very limited. Because woman is biologically a mother and she is made for heavy duty — she is a heavy-duty tire — she can control her temperament and emotion; she can overextend herself emotionally. She is a heavy-duty situation whereas man is a very single-flight situation. You put a little needle in him and all his air will go out. Then you have to deal with a flat tire. It's terrible! Sometimes when the man is fighting with you, you want to take the air out of his ego. Then you end up with a flat tire and you have to recharge the whole thing. Who wants to waste the time? Keep him going.

STUDENT: Sir, you said that a woman needs to be constant and yet you have described in the past how woman always fluctuates because of her moon cycle.

REPLY: Well, constancy is constancy and she does fluctuate. She very tolerantly, fluctuatingly, responsibly, ego-maniacally and creatively plays her role like a ping pong table but that is not what