What If You’Re Wrong?

By Wendy Cunningham

“Why don’t you believe in God?” A simple question, but one for which I didn’t have a good answer. I was confident in what I believed; I just didn’t know how I’d arrived at that conclusion. Turns out the “how” is what led me off track. I’ve had hundreds of conversations with people just like me who are on a journey to find the truth. Most people have the same fundamental questions that keep them from faith: Why do bad things happen to good people? How accurate is the Bible? What about evolution? This book tackles those questions and poses new ones, starting with the title: What if you’re wrong? Get ready to laugh as we walk through what it looks like to go from a non-believer to a devout follower of Christ.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Mar 25, 2021
• ISBN: 9781664226685

Wendy Cunningham

As an atheist who critically thought her way to faith, Wendy Cunningham believes it’s important to evaluate where our beliefs about God come from as we consider where we might be mistaken. This is Wendy’s first solo book project—she co-authored the book Success Through Failing—but she’s been a writer for more than twenty years. Her blog, www.gainingmyperspective.com, satisfies her desire to inspire, empower, make people laugh, and boldly share truth. Aside from writing, Wendy is a wife, an entrepreneur, and a homeschool mom of three. When not traveling, she and her family homestead on 84 acres in Middle Tennessee.

Book preview

Copyright © 2021 Wendy Cunningham.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means,

graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by

any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author

except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This book is a work of non-fiction. Unless otherwise noted, the author and the publisher

make no explicit guarantees as to the accuracy of the information contained in this book

and in some cases, names of people and places have been altered to protect their privacy.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

844-714-3454

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in

this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views

expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the

views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are

models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Scriptures taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®,

NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by

permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.

com The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered

in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.®

ISBN: 978-1-6642-2669-2 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-6642-2670-8 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-6642-2668-5 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2021904548

WestBow Press rev. date: 3/24/2021

To my

husband, Thomas.

You are a light in the darkness, a gift from God.

CONTENTS

Introduction

Chapter 1    What If I’m Wrong?

Chapter 2    In the Beginning

Chapter 3    Where Did I Come From?

Chapter 4    How Can I Follow That?

Chapter 5    God Help Us If He Created Man in His Own Image

Chapter 6    Why Me?

Chapter 7    Could You Have Been Created?

Chapter 8    Why Does God Let Bad Things Happen to Good People?

Chapter 9    Where Did You Come From?

Chapter 10    Pink or Blue?

Chapter 11    Now What?

Chapter 12    Is It Accurate?

Chapter 13    Are You Willing to Risk It?

Acknowledgements

INTRODUCTION

Do you remember the day you realized you don’t know everything?

It’s a rough day, right? For me, it came in my early twenties. I’d just escaped my teens convinced I was the absolute master of my universe. Imagine my surprise when I discovered I didn’t have all the answers.

What if you’re wrong? he asked.

It was an innocent enough question—regarding my disbelief in the possibility of God—but it put me on the defensive. It must have been apparent in my stutter and flushed cheeks, because the unexpected anxiety and anger that crept up from my belly was unsettling. I scoffed, dismissively, but was awkward and aggressive as I stumbled through the conversation that followed. The questions set off all kinds of alarm bells in my head and heart. Why am I so off balance? I don’t need to explain myself to this guy. I’m not the one claiming to have all the answers.

Days later I had to acknowledge it bothered me to not have answers. I don’t like being thrown off. It’s not my style to deflect and lean into emotional arguments. If I was going to do this adult thing full out, it was high time I discovered the truth for myself. No more lame, defensive rhetoric. No more pointing to others to answer for me. I was better than that.

And so are you, friend.

So, here’s the deal: I want to invite you into the search for absolute truth. It’s time to re-evaluate your theories and ask yourself some tough questions. I challenge you to ditch pathos and lean into ethos. Be a credible authority on your own beliefs.

You’re invited if you’re Catholic, Christian, a Jew, a non-believer, an atheist, a Lutheran, A Church of Christer, a Baptist, a Buddhist, a Protestant, a Methodist, an agnostic, something or someone else, or even if you’re someone who believes in the energy of the universe. My story, and this journey, is for you.

Because I fear the reality is most of us don’t know why we believe what we believe.

My motive here is to challenge you to think critically (gasp). I know, ain’t nobody got time for that. But let’s be real, there isn’t a single human on this earth who wouldn’t be served by putting a new lens—one crafted from all the knowledge and experience we’ve gathered thus far—up to an established belief system. Who doesn’t benefit from that? Because I fear the reality is most of us don’t know why we believe what we believe. Could it be that this is why we tend to feel uncomfortable and defensive when we have to talk about God and our beliefs? This was my problem. It didn’t really matter what side of the conversation I found myself on, when I didn’t have an anchor for my truth—that is, I was not absolutely positive I’d centered on it—I was simultaneously trying to throw the other person off, while avoiding deep questions about my own beliefs.

We might as well say it before we go any further: This is going to get a little sticky. There is a reason they tell you to avoid politics and religion at the dinner table. Try as I might to keep it light, this is hard stuff. I’m pretty terrified to walk this line, but I’m very certain someone should. And why not me, since it’s kind of my story? I’ve already fallen in all the potholes, so I can help you avoid them.

Here is the most difficult part, so listen carefully: You can’t go on this journey with me if you’re going to keep ego or pride in the driver’s seat—or even in the car for that matter. That would ensure you learn nothing and gain zero perspective, and you’ll probably get defensive, which helps no one. You’ve got to be willing to be wrong, if that’s where you find yourself (I said if). And let me tell you what, it’s not fun. Trust me.

Don’t mishear me. I’m not saying I know all the things. God knows I do not (like literally). But I realize it’s painful to watch pieces of, or entire belief structures and paradigms fall apart. I’ve walked it. It would have been far easier to stay defensive and put off the search. There are stories and people we trust so deeply it might be easier to pull an elephant through a pinhole than try to redefine our beliefs once we discover certain anchors in our lives are false. This is why I clung so tightly for so long. It’s hard stuff.

Even so, I implore you to be open to the possibility you might be off base in places. Be willing to go down that road, even if it feels rocky, emotional, and terribly bleak. It may be all of those things at times (doesn’t this sound fun?), but the reward at the end of this road is a truth that is absolute—not shaky, not circumstantial, and not changeable. Sounds like a pretty good anchor to me. Bring on the ethos.

So, pop quiz: If you were telling me what you believed and I asked you, "Why do you believe that?" Pay attention. Your answers might surprise you.

If you relate to any of the following, this book is for you:

• I don’t know.

• It’s what I was taught.

• It’s what I’ve always believed.

• It’s what my family believes.

• It’s tradition.

• It’s what seems logical to me.

• I never really thought about it.

• It’s not a salvation issue.

• It’s not important to really understand.

• No one really knows the actual answer.

• There is lots of research out there that suggests it.

• (And my favorite) Because the other option can’t be true.

My encouragement to you is this: Desire to believe what is true.

My name is Wendy Cunningham and we’re about to have some fun together. Feel free to laugh with me, I’m hilarious. Feel free to be annoyed with me, I’m annoying. But whatever you do, stick with me. I’m confident you’ll be glad you did.

You’ve heard the phrase: People will believe what they want to believe. That is true in most cases, no less so than in this arena of faith. My encouragement to you is this: Desire to believe what is true.

CHAPTER ONE

WHAT IF I’M WRONG?

When I found out the new guy I was dating was a Christian, I was so disappointed. I can almost feel the muscle memory of that epic eye-roll as a whole slew of assumptions downloaded into my mind to flesh out the picture I now had as I stared at the dreamboat in front of me.

Man, I was really falling for this one. But ew, gross, a Christian? Yeah, no. I can’t Christian.

Maybe he was more of a lukewarm Christian? Yeah, maybe there was still a chance, despite this affliction, if he could just be quiet about it. You know, keep a low Jesus profile. I’d never seen him go to church after all—granted, we’d only been dating for about twenty minutes. But yeah, there was totally still hope.

That is, if I could get over it.

I really thought he was intelligent. That’s what attracted me to him in the first place. But the whole Christian thing really made me wonder. It was a massive turn off. I couldn’t help but think it was going to be a colossal stumbling block if we were going to move forward in our relationship.

Y’all, it was a colossal stumbling block as we moved forward in our relationship.

We had several discussions about God in the early days of our courtship and although these discussions were sometimes heated, they were always respectful (at least they were from his side). But the fact remained: If we were going to get serious—and we were, he was dreamy—something would have to give. Surely, we could reach some kind of middle ground. Of course, in my mind, the middle ground was going to fall more in my yard and less in his.

Ironically, this dude was a lukewarm Christian. He didn’t go to church. He didn’t have much of an active faith—whatever that meant—but he was absolutely, unequivocally, undeniably set in his belief that God was real and Jesus was involved. It was annoying. So, when I said we would need to reach a middle ground, what I really meant was he was going to need to admit he was wrong and that the whole thing was make-believe. This was a big thing to disagree on. But because he didn’t seem all that rooted in God, I figured it wouldn’t be too hard to get him to bail on the whole idea.

If we end up having kids, are you going to take them to church? I asked.

I’d like to, yes.

Are you going to teach them about heaven?

That’s a part of it.

Are you going to tell them their mom is going to hell?

He laughed.

Not at all the reaction I was going for. Ladies, do we ever really know what reaction we’re going for with those zingers? He wasn’t budging. But neither was I.

The question that came next was from his