Stay With Me: Relationship, #1

By Dalton Smith

In 2019, one of the greatest fears that face couples these days is breaking up or getting divorced.
Married couples sometimes struggle with trusting each other, dealing with anger and not knowing if they will have a relationship that will last a lifetime.

Simply put, no matter how far along you are in your relationship breakups, divorce, and heartbreak
may pop up in your head from time to time.You may feel your relationship is not as strong  as you would have liked it to be.
You are worried your partner may file for a divorce.

You want these feelings to go away and you are searching for the solution to a stronger relationship.

Author Dalton Smith has the solution couples need inside Stay with me. The book provides solutions for any couple
to stay together and build upon what you have  already. Once you have finished reading you will know that divorce is not an option.
You will also know how to make your relationship stronger and last a lifetime.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Dalton Smith
• Release date: Dec 23, 2019
• ISBN: 9781393363583

Dalton Smith

Dalton Smith’s books are a culmination of profound, well-thought reflections of the experiences of everyday life. A prolific writer with over 6 years of experience writing on the topics of love, relationship, and parenting, Dalton draws from his vast experience and wealth of knowledge about different facets of life to write expressive, deep texts that exude rare, positively transformative wisdom. Dalton addresses a wide range of topics with impressive yet unique audacity and expert authority, and warm compassion that makes his readers connect with his eloquent contemplations and insightful guidance almost instantly. The pertinence of the issues Dalton addresses makes his books a haven for a broad set of readers including, couples struggling in their relationship, and parents who want to raise happy and confident children. Dalton is passionate about helping others solve their problems and takes great pride in knowing that he can be helpful. Dalton encourages his readers to face their issues boldly and genuinely guides them into finding practical, efficient solutions. To refresh his mind, Dalton enjoys biking, traveling, and watching independent films.

Book preview

Stay with me

Introduction

Chapter 1: Respect Individuality

Chapter 2: Empowering Each Other

Chapter 3: Identifying Your Problems

Chapter 4: Handling Anger

Chapter 5: Acceptance

Chapter 6: Pay Attention and Express Interest

Chapter 7: Is he really cheating?

Chapter 8: Hiring A Counselor

Chapter 9: Habits of healthy couples

Chapter 10: The Traits Of A Successful Couple

Conclusion

Introduction

If you’re like most people, you want to have good relationships with the important people in your life—your family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, clients, and customers. At the same time, you have no doubt learned from experience that good relationships don’t happen by accident or wishful thinking. They are created, developed over time, and good communication is an essential part of the fabric that creates those relationships.

While that may be true, do you feel, as many do, that your communication skills could be greatly improved—that you sometimes misunderstand what the other person is saying or meaning, feel misunderstood yourself, that you sometimes express your feelings too harshly when you’re upset or get into arguments and other communication blunders? If so, this book is for you.

For more than a decade, I’ve worked intensively in this fascinating field of interpersonal communication. I’ve been trained to teach several communication skills curricula and have taught these skills to thousands of individuals and couples, in small groups and large audiences, in churches, social organizations, family resource centers, county jail, federal prison, and other venues.

On every occasion, I’d witness people have profound personal breakthroughs in using these skills to radically improve their communication effectiveness in their marriages, families, at work, and elsewhere.

These skills have helped me greatly in both my personal and professional relationships, and I’m confident these skills will help you achieve relationship success with the important people in your life as well.

Chapter 1: Respect Individuality

You and your spouse are unique individuals with different feelings, beliefs, likes and dislikes, desires, habits, dreams, and goals. We have an inborn right to be who we are. We all hope to express our true selves freely with our partner. 

You should not expect your spouse to change into someone else after saying ‘I do.’ It also is unrealistic and burdensome to expect your spouse to meet all of your needs or to view the world the way you view it. 

You are two different individuals with different backgrounds and experiences brought together through love and your pledge to live together forever. 

What you expect from your partner and how you treat him or her should reflect acceptance. Respect your partner for who she is, not who you want her to be—just as you want acceptance from her without the need to change. Find a way to resolve differences thoughtfully. When you love your spouse who he is, you are acknowledging his authentic self. 

You should not question why your spouse needs what she needs. If a child gets up in the middle of the night and says he is thirsty, would you tell the boy that he really is not thirsty and send him back to bed? 

The key to making your marriage flourish is to appreciate your spouse’s individuality. Your spouse is not your clone. Why would you expect him to react exactly the way you react? 

Study your partner to understand why she acts the way she does. Seeking understanding can minimize conflict, boost trust, and make your marriage more satisfying and fulfilling. 

One foundation of your marriage is the mutual adoration and love you have for each other, but you cannot expect everything to be all roses all the time—especially if you don’t feed the rose bed. 

You and your spouse will have some fundamental differences; any time people live together, whether as romantic partners, family members, or housemates, they will disagree at times.

How can you maintain the love in your marriage when you and your partner have conflicting interests and points of view? Stay unprejudiced and nonjudgmental as you and your spouse discuss your differences. 

You  should know each others  feelings about children, family, household management, finances, decision-making, technology usage, and problem-solving techniques. Discuss long-term goals, hopes, dreams, and aspirations with your spouse. 

True love is the ability to love your spouse as he is in his essence. If you desire a positive relationship for a lifetime with the person you fell in love with, you must see her as a unique individual and not as an extension of yourself.

Loving someone who loves you in return is an amazing experience. To nurture that love, accept that your partner may be different from you in many ways, that the two of you will not view the world the same way, and that you may not share the same habits or beliefs. Accept and honor these differences because they helped create the unique person you love.

Chapter 2: Empowering Each Other

Abusive parenting creates a painful sense of shame, inadequacy, or superiority in children, which, if left unacknowledged and untreated, results in the prolongation of these wounds into adulthood. When events in the life of adults who still carry the wounds of childhood trauma stir up unconscious memories of their original wounding, they re-experience the shame or grandiosity of childhood and respond immaturely and dysfunctionally.

These problems of relationship with their origins in childhood are hidden from view by layer upon layer of dysfunctional adult adaptation, the layers now having usurped the true or authentic self. In such a state, healthy intimacy is impossible. Healthy intimacy requires the trusting offer of our true self to another and our trusting acceptance of the others true self in return.

For example, when a colleague of Kim’s at work reminded her that her part of the work assignment was due very