Shattered Dreams, New Beginnings: A Journey of Heartbreak, Growth, and New Beginnings: Live Life Now with Purpose

By Live Life Now

After being married over 20 years and three kids later a friend came between us. Do you think it could happen to you? I didn't- I was devastated. I am sharing my story of heartbreak to give the reader encouragement, support, and hope. Life can change, dreams can shatter, but you can pick up the pieces and your heart will heal. The sun does shine again. I prayed to find peace in my life, happiness in my heart, and love of self. I found all three. I pray you find this as well.

LiveLifeNowWithPurpose.com

• Language: English
• Publisher: iUniverse
• Release date: Aug 12, 2021
• ISBN: 9781663226068

Live Life Now

The author is the mother of three amazing adult children. She grew up in loving home in a small town as the youngest of five siblings. After realizing and finally accepting that her marriage of 20 years was over, she went through a difficult divorce and as a result, came into her own. Her journey of starting again on her own was not always easy, but it made her stronger, wiser, and more courageous than she ever thought possible. The author became the person she knew she could and always wanted to be. In 2020, she set out to find a new purpose in life— to help others going through their own struggles. She hopes to make others aware that they can and are very capable of coming out of the darkness and into a life that is full of Peace, Happiness, and Love.

Book preview

Copyright © 2021 Live Life Now.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

iUniverse

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.iuniverse.com

844-349-9409

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

ISBN: 978-1-6632-2607-5 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-6632-2605-1 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-6632-2606-8 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2021915553

iUniverse rev. date: 08/11/2021

CONTENTS

Introduction

Part 1: MY STORY BEGINS

Chapter 1: Dreams to Reality

Chapter 2: Restless, New Adventures Await

Chapter 3: A Grand Life

Part 2: HEARTBREAK

Chapter 4: Emotional Neglect

Chapter 5: The Fallout

Chapter 6: Closing the Door

Part 3: GROWTH

Chapter 7: On My Own

Chapter 8: A Fresh Start

Chapter 9: Giving Back

Part 4: NEW BEGINNINGS

Chapter 10: Turning the Page

Chapter 11: Healing a Broken Heart

Chapter 12: Love and (Re)Marriage

Part 5: LIVE LIFE NOW WITH PURPOSE

Chapter 13: Charting a New Course

Chapter 14: Forgiveness and Well Being

Chapter 15: Living a Conscious Life

Acknowledgements

Maggie

Gala Speech

To my children, I am so proud of you all. Not just for your successes in life, but for the great humans you have become. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for being the support I needed, and many times, you weren’t even aware that you were lifting me up to help set me free. I love you to the moon and beyond.

To my MM, you make my heart happy. I love you.

Meg, you challenged me to write this book. Without your inspiration people wouldn’t have this book in their hands.

Laura, you gave me encouragement and confidence, and that is priceless.

Amie, your help has meant so much to me and the book cover is exactly how I envisioned it.

My family and friends, you know who you are. You were always there for me through my many ups and downs. Much love to you all.

INTRODUCTION

I’m thankful for my struggle because without it I

wouldn’t have stumbled across my strength.

– Serpentine F.

Where should I begin. I have been contemplating writing a book for a few years now. For years, I told my first husband that he should write a book as I felt his story of starting a business was worth telling. It was never something he considered. In one of my solo sessions with our first marriage counselor, I had mentioned my thoughts of Jack writing a book and his lack of interest in doing so. What she said next really stopped me in my tracks. She asked, why don’t you write the book and share your story?. I looked at her shocked and said, well I never considered that. Over the last eight years, two different friends on two separate occasions said the same thing, why don’t you write the book?. After having this question posed to me a third time, I really gave it some thought and took this as a sign from the Universe telling me to write a book. So, a few years ago I began putting my life into words. A few thoughts here and there. After a while though, I tucked these words away never to be looked at again.

So why now? I made a comment about wanting to someday write a book and immediately after that I was challenged to make that someday, today. I began writing again and this book you hold in your hands is the result.

I accepted the challenge because I am not getting any younger and I have a lot to share. My story comes from a place of shattered dreams, heartbreak, and grief, and also from a place of finding peace, happiness, and love. When I was in the thick of it, that is what I prayed for.

Finding peace, happiness, and love. All in that order.

I knew I had to make peace with my dreams being shattered before I could find happiness within and then grow to love myself. I had to heal and that took time. Not only did it take time but if I’m being honest, it also may have taken a little bit of wine too (wink).

I began to heal, and I began to find happiness. Once I learned to love myself again, I found love from someone else as well and it has been even sweeter this time around. Even at 50 years old, I was able to find love and meaning and that is what I want for you.

You may be reading this book because you’ve had your dreams shattered. They may have been shattered because of a variety of reasons and those reasons are all valid. No matter what the reasons are, you’ve been broken, and I want to share my journey with you so you can find hope.

Let me reassure you, the sun will shine again. The aching pain will heal, and as a result of the grief, you will become stronger, you will become wiser, and you will come out of this more courageous than ever.

If you only take one thing away from reading this book, I hope it is that you realize and remember that it is never too late to make changes and become the best version of yourself. Age does not matter. I am proof. I am 55 years old, writing this book, six months into a global pandemic that we all know as Covid-19. Nothing is stopping me, and nothing should stop you.

It’s not always easy to find a silver lining, but for me, the quarantine has allowed so many of us to reflect on our lives and for me, that reflection has helped me pursue new interests. As a result, I completed a certification to become a personal coach. I made lemonade out of lemons. I want to use my real-life experiences as a mother, a partner, and a friend to help people pursue their best life.

This is my passion and I feel it serves a great purpose. I know that when I feel supported and encouraged, I can pursue my life dreams, so that is what I want for you. I want you to feel supported and encouraged so you can remove your own perceived obstacles and live a life that is full and present.

It took me ten years to get here, 55 years actually. I want to shorten your learning curve by sharing my story with you in hopes you find a spark to get you going. I am sharing my story and the purpose is to help you, the reader, to find hope.

And it goes like this……

PART 1

MY STORY BEGINS

CHAPTER 1

DREAMS TO REALITY

My life is mine to create.

– Unknown

I always wanted to be a mom. I love my mom so dearly and I wanted to be just like her. She married, had five children, and lived happily ever after. I am the youngest of five siblings and was born and raised in a small town in Canada close to the USA border. I was always wanting to be older than my age. I found it hard, at times, being the youngest of five.

My oldest sibling has downs syndrome. I will call her Penelope. She always had a younger sibling to interact with. Being the youngest, I don’t remember her being a young girl. But I do remember she loved to dance, laugh, and color – and mealtime was the best time of day for her. When we were having lunch, she wanted to know what was for dinner. Having a special needs sibling exposed us all to a group of people who taught us how precious life is and how to appreciate it and enjoy all the little moments in life.

My mother was a strong woman; she was strict but also nurturing. She ran a home full of love, tradition, and family. It was a happy childhood. I was sheltered, which I don’t believe helped me in the long run. I was raised to believe that you don’t have sex before marriage, and you lived at home with mom and dad until you were married. I was encouraged to go onto college but there was no need to go away to school, you stayed local. I planned on raising my kids the same way. That’s all I knew.

I met my first husband (I will refer to him as Jack) when we were nearly 20 years old. We had a long-distance relationship as he was a university student studying computer science in Canada. He was very smart, ambitious, and had a lot of goals – many I wasn’t even aware of at the time. He fell in love with me first, very soon after we started dating. He was my first love. I dated a few guys in high school but nothing longer than a few months. I wasn’t even allowed to date until I was 16. I met Jack on a Friday night in the mid-80s. I was in my late teens. My sister and her fiancé introduced us. It was difficult for me as he would go away to school every four months then come back to work for four months. At the same time, it gave us an opportunity to miss each other. I was not a great student, but I did my best.

Jack was a very confident person. Some called him arrogant. He was young and had grown up as an immigrant in a small farming Canadian town. He had to learn to be strong and confident. He made me laugh. He had a good sense of humor, but looking back over the years, I realized that his sense of humor could also be hurtful. If I told him I didn’t think something was funny and asked him to stop, he took pleasure in continuing to joke. But I felt he was a good man and he wanted to take care of me and that was ok with me. Hindsight, right? He always complimented me. Jack always told me how proud he was to have me on is arm when we walked into a room. There were times while we dated that I had my doubts, but by then I was in