The Shit Zone: Welcome to Your Changed Self
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The Shit Zone - Thoraiya Kanafani PhD
© 2019 Thoraiya Kanafani, PhD. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.
Published by AuthorHouse 01/15/2019
ISBN: 978-1-7283-8356-9 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-7283-8357-6 (hc)
ISBN: 978-1-7283-8355-2 (e)
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models,
and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
CONTENTS
Acknowledgments
Preface
Before We Start
Introduction
The Comfort of It All Leads to Shitty Feelings
Let’s Talk About Your Shit
Chapter 1 Variable 1: The Shit Zone
Chapter 2 Variable 2: The Happy Zone
Chapter 3 Research Behind Change
Chapter 4 The Path from the SZ to the HZ
References
About the Author
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
This book was inspired by all the people who have had the courage and the strength to venture out of their comfort zone, ultimately their Shit Zone, and into their Happy Zone.
I am grateful to all of my friends, colleagues, students, interns, and clients for inspiring me to write this book. I would like to thank Nadia for helping me complete this book without searching for a ditch in which to bury both my manuscript and myself. I’d also like to thank people who share names with those I used for this book, who involuntarily volunteered their names as culturally vague. However, above all, I would have to say that I am mostly grateful to my family for their presence in my life and their influence on its progression.
PREFACE
One of the reasons why I decided to write this book is that I fucking hate pop psychology. I can’t stand how people have been pushing this agenda of so-called happiness
and the idea that everybody needs to be happy, content, satisfied, and over the top. Let’s sell happiness this way, let’s get happy that way, and let’s all combine our happiness and fucking be happy together. Yuck and gag! This book is about realizing the reality of happiness, which is that it doesn’t fucking exist in the way pop psychology is marketing it. I’m not saying happiness doesn’t exist at all, but the way people are selling it is bullshit and needs to be called out as such.
So the reason why I don’t describe what happiness and the Happy Zone are in this book is because I don’t know what makes you happy, I’m not going to know what makes you happy, and you probably don’t fucking know what makes you happy right now anyway. I’m not going to claim to know anything about your happiness because we are all different and happiness means something different to each of us, but through your own exploration, self-awareness, and insight into your life, you’ll come to realize what your happiness means and what makes you happy. You’ll figure out what moves you out of your Shit Zone and into a zone in which you feel more content. You’ll stop feeling like My life is shit, and every day feels like shit.
Another reason why I decided to write this book is that one of the things that I consistently find amongst most of my clients and many people I know is that they are fighting—on a day-to-day, week-to-week basis—through their shit. They suffer through everything I mention in this book, yet they keep fighting. A lot of people don’t understand how that fight, in and of itself, can lead to that quick resignation: Fuck it, I don’t want to do this anymore.
But a lot of people keep fighting, and if I absolutely have to refer to something millennial, it is that the struggle is fucking real. Making that shift from a Shit Zone to a Happy Zone takes not only a lot of strength and courage, but also resilience, continuity, and consistency. I have a lot of admiration and pride in seeing my clients and people whom I know push through their shit, so I decided to honor them with a book that I hope they can connect to.
A lot of people ask me how I can do this work without getting depressed by all the stories I hear. Something that comes to me really quickly is that yes, I deal