Sunshine Spirit: Awareness of Communication as Parent, Child or Adult

By Connie Hammill

We all had a mom somewhere. Whether or not we knew this mom may affect how we see the world and how the world sees us. My biggest transition was realizing the baggage I carried from birth. My parents told me I was legally theirs, even before I was born. My Dad said, So even if you were born with purple polka dots, you were ours. I remember these words giving me a sense of acceptance and belonging with this tribe. However, I still wondered deep inside about my birth tribe. I always imagined that my mother was a very young princess who would no longer be respected if she had a child, and so had to give her baby away. I was very wrong. ********I had a reoccurring dream where my spirit was floating through a house and I was exploring the attic and basement. The dream and the setting were always the same. There were rooms in the attic that I wanted to enter, but I could not fit my body into the small, twisted entrances. I was definitely learning about my own space! During a meditation years later, the speaker said The spirit can only get as close to the body as the distance it can get out of the body. Being aware of when I was in and out of my body in a spiritual sense gave me great freedom. **********Becoming a teacher cleared my 5th Chakra.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Balboa Press
• Release date: Oct 17, 2016
• ISBN: 9781504365727

Connie Hammill

Connie Hammill has developed a teaching plan for nursing students, as the result of her fears as a student nurse. Information about her biological parents helped increase tolerance about the spiritual growth of herself and her students. Her focus is on awareness of communication between persons as an Adult, Parent or Child.

Book preview

Copyright © 2016 Connie Jean Hammill.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Balboa Press

A Division of Hay House

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.balboapress.com

1 [phone]

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

ISBN: 978-1-5043-6548-2 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5043-6549-9 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-5043-6572-7 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2016914470

Balboa Press rev. date: 10/10/2016

Contents

Is this SOMEONE Else’s DREAM?

Learning about communication with spirit

Always Pleasing Others

Born Female; Creating Relationships from the Center of My Head

Seeing myself as a Spirit in this body

Seeing others as spirits in bodies

Saying hello to my inner child

Recognizing my First, Fourth and Sixth Chakras

Meditating to let go of what no longer served me

Should I be charging rent?

Letting go of my birth mother

Collecting my Energy from my this life’s agreements

Grief and my Fourth Chakra

Observing past life agreements

Various Life Lessons

Always Loving these Books and Essential Oils

Creating my Future

Collecting Back my Energy and Owning My Fifth Chakra

Teaching Nursing Students in the Clinical Setting +21 Ideas: Growing A Nurse

Appendix Information

I have been born into this body. I am learning to communicate with others through the colors around me. The colors may be from this lifetime or another. It is nice to leave the body and be aware of going back to the ‘Universal Whole’ but living must always come down to our day to day lives and being with others.

This is the story of ‘Growing a Nurse’ and my awareness of being a spirit here for a ride on this planet. Maybe next lifetime I will be a different gender and born under different circumstances. For now, this is written From Where I AM as I remember to communicate as Parent, Child or Adult, especially as I teach nursing students.

It has been fun to explore myself as the common denominator in my life’s experiences. Writing it out has helped me see my life’s scripts and let go of many colors so I can begin to re-script my life. I hope it gives each reader permission to explore their own spiritual experience in their physical body.

Is this SOMEONE Else’s DREAM?

Letting go of the parent role has been difficult. I realize now that I felt so alone biologically that I took too long to let go of my biological children. When they each married a person who loved them and cared for them…I was slowly able to move on with my life’s purpose. When their children were born, I was again drawn into the mix emotionally. My feelings about seeing my chromosomal connection to these little people warms my heart. For many years, my children were my only knowledge of my heritage. My adoptive parents gave me a keen knowledge of the stories about the European countries their parents had fled in the early 20th century. They could not tell me about the heritage of my biological mother and father. They gave me a good home, good education and good values. For years now, I have worked to remember to speak to others and expect others to speak to me from the Adult-Adult roles. But, I found that I could not do this until I understood more about my biological parents. I was stuck in the Parent or Child role.

As a young college student I was introduced in a communication class to the concept of speaking to one another from the position of Adult, Parent or Child. The awareness of how we communicate to another person influences our unspoken relationship with others. I have learned over the years that the communication process affects us in our jobs and families. I remember how much I loved reading the works of Eric Berne when his books taught me about the communication between the Adult, Parent and Child roles. Keeping this in mind I realized how, in many areas of my life, I was speaking to others from my Parent Role. This included speaking to my husband, my adult children and my adult nursing students. Learning to speak to my husband Adult to Adult was difficult. So often I am the Parent or I talk to him as if I expect him to act like my Parent. My goal as a teacher of adults is to communicate Adult to Adult, but only a few students initially communicate with me in this way. Usually they hope to receive parental approval and praise. They also want me to be nice as they want their parents to be nice to them.

Letting go of being a parent to the adult students assigned to me was a conscious decision. When I began teaching, I would announce at our first meeting that I am a parent and I am not yours. I am here to teach you the role and duties of a nurse. Eventually, I no longer had to say anything about being a parent, because I had learned to speak to students from an Adult role. Most students could easily recognize and converse from their own Adult role. While I was moving into this teaching role, I began to follow a teaching pattern on what I presented to each student group. The results were positive because each student left their current Level of nursing feeling ready and confident for the next semester. Just as important, they dealt with their fears of becoming a nurse. In an awesome turn of events, I had settled into the adult teaching role. Recently, my world stopped long enough for me to see who I had become and write about how I got here. As my children became adults and I was teaching young adults- I was reflecting on my own life review. I now recognize who I have always been ….I am a teacher!

My life’s path taught me to say hello to the adult in others.

What were the turns of events that woke me up and caused these changes in my life? My car was rear ended and I physically could not work the twelve hour shift of a nurse. With that determination I had to act my age and get into present time. I realized that most nurses will eventually no longer work a twelve hour shift. Yet, I was teaching students in a long term acute care hospital for twelve hours and two days in a row! It would have been impossible for me to be a nurse in this hospital setting. The work was hard and the patients required extensive care. But, as a nursing student Instructor it was mostly stressful and exhausting. There were numerous medical situations seen in patient’s broken and sick bodies. My job was to teach the students in this complex setting. The process of caring for patients in this facility was very complicated for each patient. Patients were admitted for months based on the care needed for extensive injuries and/or medical complications that may include resistant, infectious disease treatments. Until I left, I did not realize how much of the student’s and patient’s fears I carried in my body. My leaving was a very emotional experience for all of us.

I am grateful that in order for me to take my next spiritual step, there were no serious injuries. Possibly the young man who was looking at the high school students instead of the traffic ahead is embarrassed that he caused the damage and inconvenience to two drivers. I felt a great loss with the ending of my opportunity to care for these very ill patients in this long term acute care hospital. But, due to this accident, I had to leave my job at this facility. I was compromised due to a small bleed in my brain that was caused by a whiplash from when my car was rear-ended. I knew that I did not feel well on those last two twelve hour shifts. But, as many nurses will do, I was able to get myself there physically and so I went through the motions of teaching the students. These students had only known me for two weeks and so did not realize my atypical behavior. However, the students who knew me from the other school where I worked only a seven hour shift were very concerned. One student explained in her daily journal that she could see that I was unable to ‘think things through’. Thankfully I am now well on all fronts. But the opportunity to experience these personal events allowed me to let go of caring for others and instead, care for myself. I already practiced mindfulness and I was ‘present’. But, now I had to deal with the emptiness inside and my fear of getting older. I eventually realized that my fear of aging was why in the past eight years I could never say no when asked to work additional hours.

Recently, I again experienced a surprise event in my career. The good news is that this time no one was injured and there were no auto accidents. Before the third week in my hospital experience with students, I knew I was emotionally exhausted. I could not get well and had very low Energy. Actually, I had not sought out this particular job, but again, did not say no when asked to teach. Before the third week with the students, the job dissolved. Leaving each job put the responsibility of my students onto each school’s Nursing Department. For me, I was freed from experiencing pain and stress and my body could again relax. In both cases, once I seriously thought that I would not continue for another term, the current term just abruptly ended. To think I created this same miracle twice! I asked and I received within days.

Creating consequences with positive thoughts was scary and yet exciting. It would lead me to my next spiritual steps toward my life’s purpose.

Learning about communication with spirit

In my 18th year I asked Hilda, the mother who adopted me, to help me find the information about my birth family. I wanted to learn more about my biological family. However, it ended up to be more than twenty five years later before all the pieces came together. Hilda’s question to me as a teenager was Why do you want to know that? So, always aiming to please, I dropped my request. What I learned, when I was 45 years old, was that my life may have been saved when I was adopted. I was beginning to realize that everything that happened to me was a necessary step to my personal and spiritual growth. I just did not know exactly why, but I felt this was true.

The good news for me was that my parents emphasized education. The thought of pleasing them kept me focused on completing a four year degree (although this took me seven years because I was working too). I was drawn to nursing as a career only because I would be paid well and could work anywhere in the world. The variety of opportunities was endless or so I had heard. However, I never did any career traveling. Instead I was happy to marry and have two children and start my own business. My adoptive Dad, Gene, was my teacher in business. He was a farmer and spent hours telling me about the hard work he put into having a successful crop. Unfortunately, his successes were few and far between and as a result he died, at 72 years of age, still paying for his own home. I was determined to succeed in my life so my Dad could see my accomplishments and be proud of his life. Dad was always my biggest supporter and made me feel unconditionally loved. He sang You are my Sunshine in my presence more than once and I felt