Covlationships & Beyond: How Covid Is Changing The Dating Game Now And After The Pandemic And How To Stop The Situationship

By Brianna Robin

A word of caution: This book is about finding love during the pandemic, and it's probably not a good fit if you're just looking for a hookup or a situationship with someone. This is for those who want to fall in love and have a partner to bear the burden of life with. 

While there's certainly no judgement if you aren't looking for that, I just don't think this is what you want to listen to right now. For those of you who are ready to fall in love, let's take this journey together. I am by no means an expert on meeting "The One" but I know what it's like to want to fall in love during an international crisis. I'm also wildly romantic and optimistic that everyone can find love if they look hard enough. Sure, the search can get arduous, but when you find your person, it's all going to be worth it.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Brianna Robin
• Release date: May 17, 2021
• ISBN: 9798201531201

Book preview

Covlationships & Beyond

How Covid Is Changing The Dating Game Now

and After The Pandemic and How to

Stop the Situationship

Brianna Robin

© Copyright 2021 - All rights reserved.

The content contained within this book may not be reproduced, duplicated or transmitted without direct written permission from the author or the publisher.

Under no circumstances will any blame or legal responsibility be held against the publisher, or author, for any damages, reparation, or monetary loss due to the information contained within this book, either directly or indirectly.

Legal Notice:

This book is copyright protected. It is only for personal use. You cannot amend, distribute, sell, use, quote or paraphrase any part, or the content within this book, without the consent of the author or publisher.

Disclaimer Notice:

Please note the information contained within this document is for educational and entertainment purposes only. All effort has been executed to present accurate, up to date, reliable, complete information. No warranties of any kind are declared or implied. Readers acknowledge that the author is not engaged in the rendering of legal, financial, medical or professional advice. The content within this book has been derived from various sources. Please consult a licensed professional before attempting any techniques outlined in this book.

By reading this document, the reader agrees that under no circumstances is the author responsible for any losses, direct or indirect, that are incurred as a result of the use of the information contained within this document, including, but not limited to, errors, omissions, or inaccuracies.

Table of Contents

Introduction

Chapter 1: Old Fashioned Dating

Dating in Person

Hitting the Apps

Hookups and Hang Ups

Chapter 2: How Did Covid Change Things?

The World Turned Upside Down

Taking Extra Precautions

Finding A New Rhythm

Chapter 3: The Loneliness is Real

Social Isolation

Lack of Connection

Feeling Alone

Chapter 4: What Are We Gonna Do Now?

Marcus and Lydia

Socially Distanced Dating

Chapter 5: Love in the Time of Covid

Alisha and Devon

Finding Deep Virtual Connections

Chapter 6: What are Situationships?

What is a Situationship?

The Situationship Cycle

Ending the Cycle

Chapter 7: Set Measurable Boundaries

Katie

Establishing Standards

Putting in Place Boundaries

Chapter 8: Guard Your Heart

Jeremiah

When Love Goes Wrong

Taking Precautions

Chapter 9: Finding Love is Possible!

Beth & Maggie:

Opening Yourself to New Experiences

Being Ready for Anything

Conclusion

References

Introduction

I

f you had told me at the beginning of 2020 I would end up locked alone in my house for nearly a year, I would’ve likely had a panic attack. In fact, I do remember getting pretty panicked in the beginning. I love going out, eating new food, and meeting new people. Before the Covid-19 Pandemic, I was always doing something with friends or discovering new places in my city. Then everything drastically changed.

The pandemic has been difficult for all of us. We’ve sacrificed more than we ever could have imagined, and we’ve dealt with innumerable challenges. Perhaps we’ll be stronger on the other side of this, more resilient. Still, I think most of us would happily trade that possible benefit for getting the last year of our lives back. Though, if the pandemic taught us anything, it was how much we’d taken for granted.

Dating was something I took for granted. I wasn’t really looking for anything special before the pandemic started and was happy to just go with the flow. If I met a great guy while out, or on a dating app, that would be great. Mostly, I just had first dates with guys who never called me back. I always knew that I would be ready if I were to bump into my person on the sidewalk, though.

Then the world shut down. I couldn’t travel anymore. I couldn’t go out to bars or restaurants with my friends. In fact, it wasn’t really safe for me to be around my friends anymore. Unless we were quarantining together, we didn’t get to see each other much. At that point, I gave up on dating entirely. I couldn’t even hang out with my friends, let alone go on a date with an attractive stranger. With all the uncertainty of the virus in the world, my social calendar was effectively wiped clean.

I know a lot of singles have felt the same during the pandemic. Sure, we might have roommates or family members to quarantine with, but the idea of finding a new relationship has appeared almost impossible. Where could we meet anyone? What would be the point of connecting with someone on yet another Zoom meeting if we would never have face-to-face contact? Being young and single during the pandemic has quite possibly been the loneliest feeling in the universe.

Amazingly, though, people are still going on dates. In fact, some have even found love during the last year. Some couples met because of the extraordinary circumstances of the last year and are now planning their weddings. Some singles have found that dating during this time is easier than they would have ever expected. For those of us who haven’t had that experience, I have to wonder; is there a magical formula to finding your soulmate during a pandemic? Scratch that, is there a magical formula for finding your soulmate, period?

Let’s face it, dating wasn’t exactly a cakewalk before this madness started. The easiest way to meet people in the last few years has been dating apps, and those don’t always produce winners. More and more people are just looking to have hookups and are always sure to make clear that they aren’t ready for anything serious. How often have you heard that line? Even if you find someone you really like and with whom you have chemistry, it’s likely that it never turns into anything more than a few good dates.

Then, there’s the dreaded situationship. I know, it seems like I’m just making up words, but this is a real thing. It’s that awkward dance when you aren’t sure if you’re in a relationship or not. Maybe you’ve gone on a few dates with someone, and you think it’s going well, but you haven’t defined the relationship yet. You aren’t technically exclusive, but you’re not seeing anyone else. You’re worried about asking him what he’s thinking because he might think you’re getting too serious too quickly. While you’re busy trying to navigate all these nuances, you suddenly find that the relationship has fizzled out and now you aren’t anything at all.

Finding love is a minefield, and we’re all just casualties. Still, I have to have hope that the right person for me exists somewhere and one day we’ll meet. Sure, the last few years have not indicated that’s the case, but I can’t be the only human being in the world who isn’t destined to fall in love with someone. Right?

Cue the panic. A lot of singles feel this pressure. If they’ve reached a certain age and still haven’t settled down, they feel like they’re going to die alone in their apartment surrounded by cats. It’s the cliché narrative that the media keeps forcing onto us. Magazines say that women who haven’t fallen in love by 40 are more likely to be killed by terrorists (Garber, 2016). Movies are constantly creating wildly unrealistic stories about people finding love, and making the rest of us worry that we’re literally going to have to traverse the entire planet to find it.

It’s overwhelming in the best of times. In Corona times, it feels impossible. I’ve also realized how much I don’t want to end up alone. I want to spend my life with someone, because I’ve had to deal with myself for far too long. I’ve had a year of forced self-discovery, and I’m ready to share myself with someone who’s had a similar experience. I probably know myself now than I ever have, and it’s exciting. It also makes me realize that while I can be happy by myself, I don’t always want to be that way.

People always say that if you can’t be happy with yourself, you won’t ever feel happy with someone else. I truly believe in the validity of this statement, but I think being unhappy alone during quarantine is a whole other matter. If you’ve gotten through this last year and realized that going through a traumatic event alone is not your jam, you’re in good company. If, God forbid, something like this were to ever happen again, I don’t want to be single for it. Pure and simple.

Until the pandemic is officially over, what can I do to change my situation? How will I ever meet someone new? How can I ensure that I’m falling for someone who wants the same thing I do? What if they’re not looking to get too serious? What if I fall in love with someone online and get catfished? What if I expand my dating radius (as so many singles have done during the pandemic) and end up falling for someone who lives 3,000 miles away? How can I break the cycle of the situationships I’ve been struggling with for years?

You might have many of the