Habits: Friend or Foe: You Be the Judge

By Allan D. Wright

Most of us are somewhat discontent with one or more aspects of our lives, looking back over past actions and experiences wishing we had taken different paths than we did. For those of us who aren't quite sure why we react, in certain ways, the possibility of a common denominator keeps tickling us with questions like, Don't most people act that way? or, Am I different from others?' or, Can I really change the basic me? It is the purpose of this little book to answer some of these oft asked questions about why we human beings do what we do. It also offers concrete solutions for those who wish to change which will help them get a bigger piece of life's cake --- at any time.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Nov 26, 2013
• ISBN: 9781491834121

Allan D. Wright

Allan D. Wright, MA, LCADC, NAADAC; Addictions Counselor -- Private Practice, Life member -- Methodist Ch. Wabash College, Seton Hall Univ.; Residence-Bloomfield, NJ, 50 yrs. -- also Indiana, Chicago, Miami, U.S.Navy; Born near Cleveland, Ohio -- then to NJ; Early career -- Life Ins. Business-15yrs; Second career-Psychology and Counseling; He has been widowed for 10 years, after 56 years of happy marriage to his H.S. girlfriend, Audrey. Always an enthusiastic writer, Mr.Wright has authored numerous articles, religious sermons, and presentations to member associations. An avid traveler, he has made numerous cross-country trips, also visiting Austria and Hawaii, ever gathering friends and experiences for his writings. You will enjoy his easy, humorous writing style, and share in his basic philosophical approach to finding happiness in these difficult times.

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Introduction

The Nature Of Human Habits

Habits And Their Kin

How Habits Are Formed

The Brain; A Major Role

The Elimination Of Bad Habits

The Formation Of Good Habits

Habits And Addictions

Changes: Why?? How??

The Six Steps

Some Final Thoughts

Author

THANKS TO:

SANDY DOKACHEV—Thanks Sandy, my EDITOR and constant friend, whose skills and patience with my crazy-ness was invaluable as I tried to be a writer. Sandy was always supportive and caring about this little book, desiring, as did the Author, for this book to be read by many.

KATHY and BOB MARTINEZ, whose continued understanding and support made it a pleasure to write and share these truths.

To all the fine folks who became characters and examples—some as far away as California and Canada, some who didn’t even know they might help others with their lives and happiness, and some who were very cooperative in being written about. To all of you—Thank you, so much. The Author

INTRODUCTION

Traveling by car on numerous occasions across this magnificent country of ours, from East to West and back in a random fashion to my home in New Jersey, I have had the opportunity to meet many fascinating people. This experience has enriched my outlook on the wonderful differences between human beings, and on the uniqueness of the personality which I personally have been blessed or cursed with.

During a recent trip, which covered 30 states, 12,000 miles, and lasted six weeks, I had an experience which was both frustrating and enlightening, As I later looked back upon it, I had what could be called an epiphany, a sudden revelation. Before sharing this awareness with you, let me first describe the circumstances surrounding this experience.

Imagine you are touring through the canyons of Utah and have stopped at a rustic restaurant/gas station to refuel and relax a bit. That is where I found myself, needing a break and some good country cooking. Returning to my car after a sandwich and coffee, I received a jolt—I had left my keys lying on the front seat, and then locked the car!! How could I have been so stupid? The extra set of keys which I always take with me on a trip were in a jacket in the back seat, and there was no way for me to open the doors. I said to myself, Don’t panic. They must have an some kind of an emergency car opener in this gas station. After a hasty inquiry at the service station, I discovered that they did not have one. The closest place that might have an opener was 45 miles in another direction. An expensive phone call, the wasting of one and a half hours of valuable time and a charge of $75.00 for the service man from another gas station to drive to where I had stopped, put me back on the road again, heading for Colorado.

Now, the epiphany. Most of us live lives which are controlled by habits, and we aren’t even aware of what most of them are. As I drove through the scenic hills of Colorado, the more I pondered this fact and the more I realized that although we need habits in our lives to provide structure, many of them become contrary to our happiness and well being. So, why wouldn’t it be worthwhile for each of us to take a good look at our own habit patterns, and perhaps make some changes? For example, in the above scenario, the habit of taking the keys out of the ignition when I stop for gas is a good one; keeping them in my hand is a good one; not putting the keys in my pocket before leaving the car was a bad move; taking an extra set of keys with me is a good habit, but not keeping them with me at all times—thus leaving them in the car, was a bad one; having renewed my AAA membership before the trip was a good precaution; forgetting that I had my AAA card in my wallet and paying the repair man $75.00 to come and unlock the car was a costly mistake.

In the many months since that most enjoyable trip, my thinking about the complexities of habit development, as