My Child: The Realities

By Irene Brenda Tettey-Palm

This book uncovers the fundamental issues that families experience in real life. It delves into the roles of parents and their young ones as well as the challenges each face today. It places special emphasis on striving for godliness in every way and engages readers to unravel the mysteries in their lives to give hope and to unite families by reflecting on the word of God.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse UK
• Release date: Dec 12, 2013
• ISBN: 9781491885819

Irene Brenda Tettey-Palm

iRENE BRENDA T

Book preview

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© 2013, 2014 Irene Brenda Tettey-Palm. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse   03/22/2014

ISBN: 978-1-4918-8580-2 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4918-8579-6 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4918-8581-9 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2013911802

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Contents

About the Author

About the Book

Preface

Introduction

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

To my beloved children, Efa and Eli.

About the Author

Irene Brenda Tettey-Palm suffered great pains beginning in her childhood and continuing onto the rugged road of marriage. The struggle to protect and preserve her children’s future, combined with the agony of the ups and downs of her life were the God-given experiences that led her to writing.

Tettey-Palm’s innermost love and sacrifice for her children propelled her to teach others to see God and fear Him in all that they do. She believes in the importance of children and family because the children of today are the adults of tomorrow.

Tettey-Palm doesn’t see herself as a superwoman but as a woman to whom God has given His grace in abundance. She has nothing to boast about but the love of Christ and His grace. God has blessed her by trusting her with the care of two great nations (children) with whom she lives in the United Kingdom. Jesus is the centre of their home, their shield, and the horn of their salvation.

About the Book

This book uncovers the fundamental issues that families experience in real life. It delves into the roles of parents and their young ones as well as the challenges each face today. It places special emphasis on striving for godliness in every way and engages readers to unravel the mysteries in their lives to give hope and to unite families by reflecting on the word of God.

Preface

Irene Brenda Tettey-Palm, author of My Child: The Realities, now in its revised edition, responds to the life challenges she has overcome by writing. She strongly values children and family, and she shows these values in her devotion to parenting her own children and her love for teaching others. She is a labourer in the Lord’s vineyard who owes all that she is and has to Him, for He directs her focus very delicately to bring her to His glorious calling. She is blessed with two lovely children, Efakornam (‘the Lord has comforted me’) and Elikem (‘the Lord has established me’), and lives in the United Kingdom.

My Child: The Realities came about as a result of pains Irene suffered beginning in her childhood and continuing onto the rugged road of marriage. The struggle to protect and preserve her children’s future, combined with the agony of the ups and downs of her life, were her God-given experiences, which led her to write. She had no knowledge of writing or publishing when she wrote the first edition, but she overcame intimidation and suppression as well as other trials by writing.

Her immense love and devotion to her children ignited her passion to teach others to see God and fear Him in all that they do and also to see that children and family are immensely important, because today’s children are tomorrow’s adults, and so parents should work in harmony to raise their children.

Words cannot express Irene’s appreciation for her children, who showed maturity and bravery beyond their years in the hardest times for the family. They are her greatest inspiration, as they have pushed her to give them a life and a future she never had. She thanks God so much for not allowing them to scatter and instead gathering them to her bosom. She also profoundly thanks them for allowing her to take so much of their time to revise this book.

Irene’s children have taught Irene that the simplest way to gain a child’s confidence is to tell the truth, to admit your faults, and to be willing to change yourself instead of trying to change things around you, despite the drawbacks and discomforts. Young ones are wise.

When the first edition of My Child was published, many readers thought it was a good start, but a lot more despised Irene’s efforts and were spiteful; however, she didn’t let this stop her. Rather, it motivated her to prove what she believes within her and to draw upon the rich deposits of God in her. This revised edition took longer to write than the first edition because the Lord has now wiped away all Irene’s tears, lifting her into another dimension of faith and has filled her heart with sweet melodies, letting her see that weeping may endure for a night but that joy comes in the morning. She understands that God has a beautiful and incomparable plan and purpose for her and her family, and that each day He positions them for heavenly blessings. Irene has seen that the Lord always turns evil deeds to come out for the good of those who sincerely love Him. She appreciates God for preserving her life and saving her from the acid attack, which would have disfigured her body.

Irene doesn’t see herself as a superwoman but as a woman who has received God’s grace in abundance. She has nothing to boast about but the love of Christ and His grace, for it’s true that God’s help isn’t determined by who we are or what we have; however, all good things come from Him alone. They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength and mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. We all have something in us which we must explore and exercise, and we can choose to tap into it with God’s grace. We must remember that they that dare are always different and that there is always hope as they struggle. It’s Ebenezer, thus far the Lord has helped us. To God be all the glory.

Introduction

Childhood and family are very significant subjects. The promise for childhood could be crippled if that child doesn’t receive motivation and help from people around him. Every child is important, for no one knows what any child will grow up to become—a child despised today could be a child of honour tomorrow.

For this reason, the enemy seeks to destroy, kill, and steal every child’s divine destiny, no matter the child’s background. The enemy uses anyone who makes him—or herself available for these tasks, even the loved ones we least suspect. Therefore, it is imperative that all parents and carers, whether caring for their own children or someone else’s, approach childcare with the utmost prudence. We must lay a good foundation for childhood and fortify its walls and gates with prayer, for without such a foundation we lay unnecessary burdens on our children’s future. This foundation is so important that I have the audacity to believe that God is the only authority concerning life, and that we must be determined to live within His will. Many parents have fallen out of God’s plan for their lives by giving in to their evil and lustful desires, and they have brought many unexplained consequences to their lives and the lives of their children. But if you align yourself with God’s ways, He will always push you towards your destiny, even if your parents or those you trust most might try to lead you off course.

Therefore, let every child of God look up to Him and only to Him, for you will only fulfil His plan for you if you turn to Him.

The road to success in life is as unsteady as a child’s first steps. With those first steps, the child falls and rises again, perfecting his or her walk with each fall; and as we strive for success, we will stumble, but each fall will help us perfect our work towards the goal. Determination allows us to move forward and see mistakes as turning points and failures as motivational tools. Such positive thinking yields achievement, for what we say and think about ourselves is what we become. We must be extreme in our belief in ourselves and our belief that all things are possible through prayer.

Ideas about success are important to parenting, because raising children, without a doubt, is the hardest thing you can ever do. It’s a task we must face with our own biological children or with someone else’s child, because it’s a reality of life.

We must take the journey of caring for our young ones in Christ one step at a time, and the first step is to look back on our own upbringing and how it has impacted us and how we can improve for our children. Such reflection makes the subject approachable and allows us to set goals that are worth trying our best to achieve. By understanding our failures, successes, limitations, and strengths as we move through our journey give us insight into what to do and expect next, and having the ability to plan for success can make being a parent more fun than stressful.

All parents have high expectations for their children, but many parents needlessly stress themselves to death trying to make their children fit a mould, because they have not yet learnt to understand the unique needs and capabilities of each of their children. Each child is created to fulfil an assignment unique to him or her. For the child to fulfil that assignment, we must treat him or her like a garden, which needs to be cultivated with daily nourishment. It also requires that we remove weeds, which are detrimental attitudes and behaviours, and we parents remove them by talking to our children daily about what is right and by constantly correcting them. Most importantly, we must allow our young ones to explore and to discover, and we must give them room to make mistakes from which they will learn to improve their ways. A child’s personality has many layers, and it takes lots of patience and care for a parent to unwrap them to discover who that child is at his or her core.

Furthermore, we need to understand that with each passing moment, we become better parents. Over the years, we must grow and develop as parents and adjust how we approach our children to their ability to understand and to take charge by leading and directing our children gently. In this way, they will feel they have been brought up and not dragged up.

You may feel negatively about parenting because you face challenges now, but as long as you do not neglect your child, there’s hope for the future. Your toils will not go unrewarded.

Our challenges as parents are not unique to us. Our parents once felt the way we feel now, and many of them had to make great sacrifices in order to give us the future we enjoy today. For example, a good number of parents have had to sell things that were very dear to their hearts just to get money to see their children through. Some also endured very harsh living conditions in order to give their children a better life. Some have gone through painful relationships, neglect, and abandonment. Many great people who excel can testify to the sacrifices of one or both of their parents.

An effort may seem hopeless and daunting in the beginning, but determination always stirs up hope. No matter how unappreciative children are, a time will come when they reflect on their parents’ sacrifices and know that if their parents endured that, they can also overcome the obstacle they are facing.

So many children grew up without the model of a father or a mother. These children simply survived and made their way to adulthood without the foundation they’d need to live independently. This problem has contributed to the instability of families and confusion about the family in society today. People who are not family members may take on the role of a mother or father for a child in a single-parent household, yet the children will still miss the influence of a true parent. Such children may present the best picture of themselves to the outside world, but when others draw a little closer to them and truly get to know them, they discover the horror of what lurks inside. Some adults have many happy stories to tell about their upbringing while others have nothing but stories of pain and anger and feel hatred towards one or both of their