Forgiving Self-Destructive Behavior
PODCAST #413
















Forgiving self-destructive behavior keeps many people stuck in confusion and conflict. If you've spent a huge portion of your life stuck in self-sabotage, self-destructive or unhealthy patterns of thought or behavior, then this episode is for you. In it we're going to explore how to forgive yourself for being so harmful, for making poor decisions and wasting time. Forgiveness is the balm that will soothe your heart and give your mind the brain space it craves to walk and think with more confidence. 







In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we'll be talking about:







Why it's so hard to forgive ourselves when we don’t struggle as much in forgiving others13 things you can do to start letting go and forgiving yourself for harmful things you've doneThe next steps to take in rebuilding your self-trust and self-compassion



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INVITATION:




Look, if you want to like yourself, give yourself and edge of confidence by understanding where you are in the 5 Stages of Confidence. If you've never heard my coaching on this before, now's the time to jump in. I'm re-offering my 5-star rated webinar on How to Have More Confidence. In it you'll learn the 5 Stages of Confidence, the Confidence Formula, and how to get from one stage of confidence to the next.



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A month or so ago my friend watched a guy strut by with a posture and confidence that made her stop and say, "If I had his confidence I could rule the world." And I stopped and thought, "That's an opportunity for me. Why the heck not me?" I strive to be an inspiration and role model to my two young children and to be the person I deserve to be to be myself. This podcast has really opened my eyes and my mind and is helping me become stronger and more confidence everyday. I am so grateful to have stumbled upon your coaching and look forward to growing with you more. Thank you so much and please keep it up! 











 
WHY IS IT SO HARD TO FORGIVE YOURSELF?




Self-forgiveness is not letting yourself off the hook, or being easy on yourself. 



It's understanding that unforgiveness doesn't help, and holding onto things hurts your psyche. 



Guilt is a long-term decision to feel miserable for a long time. And there are deep consequences. You'll be miserable, and you'll attract other miserable people. 



Difficulty forgiving also leads to heart attacks, high blood pressure and depression. 







What types of self-destructive behavior can be hard to forgive?




Any type that you have wanted to be free from - some examples of which are: over eating, over drinking, binging, compulsive shopping, gambling, scrolling, cutting, compulsive exercising, control, perfectionism, procrastination, smoking, toxic relationship patterns







13 WAYS TO START FORGIVING YOURSELF FOR SELF-DESTRUCTIVE BEHAVIOR




Take ownership of your mistake. 



Articulate how you feel. 



Identify the hurt



Understand what you want (peace) 



Recognize unrealistic expectations 



Stop living on replay mode



Apologize to yourself or your body



Put things into perspective



Allow God in 



Replace guilt with gratitude 



Renew your mind



Do a new thing (repent, change behavior, etc.)



Rest and trust. 







Unbelief makes it hard for us to forgive ourselves.



-we believe in forgiveness for others



-we believe that God forgives in theory



-so why can't we forgive ourselves







NEXT STEPS IN REBUILDING SELF-TRUST & COMPASSION




…while also still maintaining and nurturing positive behavior change.