The Unplanned Journey

By Joquitta Palmer

The unplanned journey is a book about a journey I never imagined. I often wonder why God allows certain things to happen in my life. I have often heard the term that God will not give you more than you can handle. If anyone had told me that I would spend almost two decades in prison, I would have thought they had lost their mind. It was one thing to be accused of such a horrific crime, but to be charged and sent away for it, that was another thing. I thought there is no way I could ever make it through such an ordeal. I thought I would lose my mind. I surprised myself and many others. Not only did I serve each day of the seventeen years, but I did it with dignity and integrity. I grew. My faith grew, and I am a better person because of it. I must admit it was not easy at all. I was upset with God that he would allow such a thing to happen to me. His word says in Romans 11, "God treats everyone the same." Job was a man who was righteous in the sight of God, so if God would allow him to go through hard trials, why would it be any different for me? So I used this experience to make me better, not bitter.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Jan 22, 2020
• ISBN: 9781644589168

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The Unplanned Journey

Joquitta Palmer

Copyright © 2019 by Joquitta Palmer

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, solicit the publisher via the address below.

Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.

832 Park Avenue

Meadville, PA 16335

www.christianfaithpublishing.com

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

How My Life Began

A New Beginning

A Brilliant Idea

Let the Search Begin

Becoming Acquainted

Welcome Home

More to Learn about Breanna

Tragedy Comes to Our House

The Shock of Being Arrested

On My Way to the Big House

Moving to the Yard

Getting a Different Job

Going to Manzanita

Going Full Circle

Becoming a Widow

God Spares My Life and Saves My Job

Moving to Minimum Custody

My Final Year in Prison

Getting Out and Going Home

Working the Program

Free at Last!

Moving Onward and Upward

Introduction

I am writing this book to share about an event in my life that came as a complete shock for me and changed the entire course of my life. I could never imagine that this could ever be a part of God’s plan for my life. When I think of the scripture Jeremiah 29:11, For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. I never thought there would ever be a point in time that I would be serving a prison sentence. As a matter of fact, I used to always say I will never go to prison, but as the old cliché goes, Never say never. This book explains how those very words became a reality for me. I was on my way to a place I said I would never go.

I made a decision that separated me from my family and friends for years, but I was never alone. God was with me every step of my journey. He kept his promise: I will never leave thee nor forsake thee (Hebrews 13:5).

How My Life Began

Have you ever asked yourself the question, What was God thinking? I have asked myself this on more than one occasion, and I am sure I will again many more times during this lifetime. When I think of this question, the scripture that comes to my mind is Jeremiah 29:11; it reads as follows, I know the thoughts and plans I think toward you, declares the Lord. I know that God knows that if he had told me that I would go through the experiences that are enclosed in this book, I would not have believed it. As it still stands, I am flabbergasted when I think that I went through them and grew emotionally and spiritually as a result of those experiences. I can remember saying I do not know what God is doing, but obviously He thinks I am strong enough to endure it.

According to my mom, Nay, when I was six months old, I was already crawling and sitting up. One day, she had put me down for a nap. When I awoke, I attempted to crawl out of my crib and took a nasty fall. Immediately, I began to have seizures. Mom said whenever I would overexert myself, I would go into a seizure. She also said the seizures set me back six months. I had to learn to crawl and sit up all over again. I was on some strong medication for the seizures. The medication was called Phenobarbital. I took it three times a day

Each time I had a seizure, the entire right side of my body would jerk. I was hospitalized with each seizure. My brother Geggy and I were very close, and Mom said every time when I would wake up in the hospital, I would ask, Where is Geggy? I had my last seizure when I was eight years old. The very last one I had, I can remember the pastor of the church we attended, came to see me. His name was Reverend Tilman. He asked me, Joquitta, do you want to be healed? I told him yes. Rev Tilman prayed for me and I never had another seizure from that day forward. The doctor kept me on the medication for the next year as a precaution. Because of the seizures, I had poor vision. The doctor said the seizures had affected the part of the brain that controlled my sight.

I grew up in a little town in Arizona called Coolidge. I can remember being a tomboy because the siblings that I grew up with were all boys. My brother Geggy and I were very close. We were best friends. I called him Geggy and he called me Dotta because we could not pronounce one another’s name. My brothers Dewayne and Wayne still tease us to this day by referring to us as Dotta and Geggy. He and I are eleven months apart, so we are the same age for one month. It was in that one month that we would always get asked our age.

When I started school, I was already wearing glasses. I was teased a lot because glasses were not a fashion statement back then like they are now. I wore what they called cat eye glasses. The lenses were quite thick. Kids would say things to me like Girl, your glasses are so thick I bet you can see the future or You sure look funny in those cat eye glasses.

When I read, I would hold the book two inches from my face in order to see it, and that was with glasses. My teacher told my mom that she thought I may be mildly retarded. She told her that I should see a child psychologist. I can remember an instance when I went to see the psychologist. He gave me a puzzle to put together. He showed me the picture of the animal and told me to put the puzzle together for him. I looked at the picture, then I looked at the pieces he had given me. I told him if he would give me all of the pieces, I would put it together. He later told my mom that I was an intelligent child and the only problem I had was poor eyesight.

I can also remember on one occasion when we, my brother Geggy and I were in the grocery store and an elderly gentleman asked us our age. We both answered eleven. His next question was Are you twins? to which we replied no. Do you have the same parents? he asked. We replied yes. He then asked, How is it you are not twins? We shrugged our shoulders and said in stereo, I don’t know. Once we made it home, we asked our mother and she explained to us that we were eleven months apart. I found out later that we are what they call Irish twins.

I have many fond memories growing up with my brothers Geggy and Wayne. For example, we loved riding our bikes. We would build a ramp by using an old tire and a board to see who could jump it the best. They were both better than I because I was too afraid to go fast. We also liked to have races against one another. I must admit that they were faster than I was. I did keep up pretty good though. I even went on to run track in junior high school, which is now called middle school. My two younger brothers DeWayne, Dion, and I liked playing house together. I was always the mom, and Dion was the baby.

I was born on December 26, 1963, in a little place called Boree Corner right outside Coolidge, Arizona; fifty years later, there is no such place. I was born at home. I was delivered by a midwife. Shortly after, when I was six months old, my parents and I moved to a farm, where we stayed until I was ten months old. This is according to my mother. I will call her Nay. I am the eldest child of ten children between my mom and dad. Geggy was born in 1964, Wayne in1967, Dewayne in 1969, and Dion in 1971. Geggy and I are the only two that were born at home. My parents divorced when I was seven years old.

I am my mother’s only girl and she has four boys. On the other hand, I have my dad who has children with two other women. My first sister Lyn was the result of my dad’s extramarital affair; Lynn and my brother Dewayne are eight months apart. We found out Lynn was our sister when my brother Dewayne came home from elementary school one day and announced to my mother that he had a girlfriend with the same last name we did. My mother asked the name of the girl, and when he told her, my mother called a family meeting and informed us that Lynn was our sister. My parents had already divorced when this event took place. They divorced when my mom was pregnant with my baby brother.

According to my mom, apparently, my dad asked my mother not to reveal the identity of Lynn to us. She agreed but told him the first time one of their sons come home and tells her his sister is his girlfriend, she will inform me and my siblings of the truth, and that she did. She explained to us that dad had another child with someone else and that made her our half-sister. Lynn was in the same town we were.

I did not grow up with my youngest three siblings. I knew about them but did not really become acquainted with them until we became adults. My son and my second sister were born the same year. My dad did not come around much to visit us. He had a new family and we were in his past; well, I was anyway. Maybe since I looked like my mom, I reminded him of her. I will never know why. All I know is we did not have that father-daughter relationship that a girl likes to brag about. My father not taking interest in me growing up; it made me sad but also brings a scripture to mind. It is found in Psalm 27:10, My father and mother may desert me, but the Lord will accept me.

My mother never remarried, and she never talked bad about our dad to us or put him down. She was totally committed and focused on making sure that my brothers and I had the love, shelter, and nurturing that we needed. Being raised with four brothers was good for me. I didn’t have to worry about a sister getting into my things or even sharing a room. On the other hand, I think it would have been nice to have a sister to share secrets and give advice to or even get advice from.

Being the only girl did come with some high expectations. I had many responsibilities, with Mom being the sole provider for the family, I was quite the little helper. I learned how to cook, clean, and manage a house at an early age. As a matter of fact, my mom taught me and my brothers to be strong and independent individuals and for that I am grateful. My brothers learned the same household duties. The Bible says, Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6). Many people use to think I was older than I actually was because of my maturity level. The ironic thing is I am fifty-four years old now and everyone thinks I am younger.

My father was not an active part of my life after he divorced my mom. He did not spend quality time together with me. I felt rejected, inadequate, abandoned, and that I did not matter to him and that I was not an important part to him. He proved my feelings to be correct on more than one occasion. For example, when he made the choice not to be involved in all of the important events in my life. First, when I graduated from high school, he did not attend. This struck me odd because his own sister, my aunt, graduated at the same time. When I gave birth to my son, he lived about ten minutes from the hospital, but he did not come to see me or my son, his first grandchild.

Second. When I got married, he did not attend the wedding. As a matter of fact, he even went as far as to call my grandfather and told him not to give me away (stand up for me) at my wedding. By the way, I did give my dad the courtesy of asking him before asking my grandfather, and he told me no. I was twenty years old, so I did not need his permission. I simply wanted