Wake up and Be YOU: Heal, Transform and Free Your Mind - Using the Grace Method

By Susanne Grace

Has worry, doubt, depression, or stress hijacked your efforts to have a positive mindset?

Imagine an extraordinary life where you set the rules for your own experiences. Instead of allowing negativity to sabotage your best efforts, you allow your heart to take the reins. When you ask your heart to lead, magic happens.

This book will show you how to awaken to your true Self - the absolute best version of you - through examining the small Self and the ego.

Thousands have enjoyed transformation by using The Grace Method and its powerful ability to align your beliefs with what you want and connect you with the profound peace of your Soul.

With practical strategies, this book can leave you feeling calm and amused at your fleeting stress - regardless of the chaos around you.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Susanne Grace
• Release date: Aug 9, 2022
• ISBN: 9781922461056

Susanne Grace

Susanne knows what it takes to be faced with her own mortality.  A broken marriage, depression, poverty and ongoing illness were just some of the challenges that she faced on her path to health and wellness. Interested in going beyond what she found in classical medicine, Susanne explored the world of natural therapies to regain her health. As a result of this journey, Susanne’s health has been fully restored and provided her with a new passion in life—helping others to improve their lives through their own journeys. By sharing the knowledge gained from 30 years of working in and experiencing the health industry from all sides she hopes to help others bring health, happiness and success into their lives, as it has in hers. As well and working as a Registered Nurse for over 20 years and gaining a Bachelor of Business, she has been a meditation teacher for fifteen years, and trained in many modalities such as Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Time-Line Practitioner, MACE Energy Method Practitioner, Life Coaching, Master Business Coaching, Emotional Intelligence, and is Certified to deliver and assess the EQ-360 and MSCEIT Emotional Intelligence tests.

Book preview

Table of images

Image 1. The different parts of you

Image 2. The person

Image 3. Your head vs. heart

Image 4. The ego

Image 5. Your life-force energy

Image 6. Thought-forms

Image 7. Energy is given to thought

Image 8. Creating beliefs and emotions

Image 9. A new part of your person is created

Image 10. The filters of experience

Image 11. Your unique experience of life

Image 12. The witness

Image 13. Knowing vs. believing

Image 14. Giving energy to the parts of your person

Image 15. Feeling off-centre

Image 16. Scattered energy

Image 17. The ego’s attachment

Image 18. Me, the person

Image 19. The reality

Image 20. Divine time

Image 21. The present moment

Image 22. Your choices

Image 23. The parts of your person are programmed

Image 24. Experiencing opposing beliefs

Image 25. Thought becomes the thinker

Image 26. Your inner children

Image 27. Holding parts of your person down

Image 28. Your greatest addiction

Image 29. Your intelligent heart

Image 30. Heart is the solution

Image 31. Your emotion is the messenger

Image 32. Now there are two

Image 33. Co-dependent parts of our person

Image 34. The 3 steps to inner transformation

Image 35. The detachment

Image 36. Heart to heart connection

Image 37. Forgiving

Image 38. The entangled parts of your mind

Image 39. Law of Attraction

Image 40. The levels of awakening

Image 41. The perceived death of the ego

Image 42. The tipping point

Image 43. Finding balance

Image 44. The universal mind

Image 45. The levels of perception

Introduction

If you were born in the depths of a thick jungle, you would know the dangers of living in this environment. You may have been told there is no other way of living because no-one in your tribe knows anything different. Perhaps you’ve heard rumours that another world lies beyond the jungle, yet no-one believes this is possible. Surviving in this jungle is all-consuming, as the bugs bite and deadly spiders and snakes are prolific. Under every log lies potential pain and a threat to your survival. You don’t know where you’re heading, yet something is calling you from deep within. Deep down your inner being knows how to lead you beyond this constant struggle of life, yet you can’t hear it as the thick, dark undergrowth of the forest floor is overwhelming and you don’t have time to figure it out.

For you, being stuck in the undergrowth could be the job you don’t like, the relationship issue that’s driving you nuts, the finances that are not working for you, or the body that isn’t up to the standard you would like. When you don’t like where you are, stress, worry, anxiety, depression, or feeling super frustrated can be your daily experience. How do we get so bogged down? It’s simple. We have forgotten who we are. Your ‘true Self’ is forever calm, clear, and has all the answers you seek.

You’ve been conditioned to believe in the danger of living life to its fullest. It’s not your fault if you’re feeling restricted and yearn for more. If you have a deep desire for inner happiness, peace of mind, and learning how to be free in the juicy flow of life, this book will help you immensely. Whether or not you have had spiritual experiences of awakening or have been a serious meditator, this book will explain the process that waking up to your true Self can bring. How much has it cost you to remain in the grip of the incessant chatter in your head? What have you missed out on due to your inner fears or insecurities? It’s okay, we all have them. Waking up to what holds you back can be mind-blowing—this book aims to do just that. It will show you that you’re not the person you think you are. You are so much more.

It is no coincidence you have picked up this book; you are ready to awaken even more. Step by step, this book will guide you. Through simple, yet powerful images, this book will show you what your person really is. Thoughts, emotions, beliefs, and memory are demonstrated in a new light that helps to make sense of how your mind works. When you understand this process and how you create the many parts of your person, you can make dramatic shifts that will explode your view of the world into a new and exciting perspective and therefore experience of life. A fresh and unique approach is needed as the world is waking up. Your crisis, your illness, or your disasters may be your key to becoming aware of a new level of consciousness.

Understanding where you are in the awakening process and having the tools and methods to assist you is invaluable. Many have struggled through this journey on their own without a real understanding of what’s happening to them. Because each one’s awakening is unique, without this knowledge, one can think they’re going mad. This book will show you that you’re not going mad; instead, you’re waking up from the madness.

Becoming aware of our true Self is often referred to as a spiritual awakening simply because we open up to the spirit of our true nature. It has nothing to do with religion or beliefs and no disrespect to any religion is intended; rather, it’s about detaching and stepping back from belief and opening into our inner knowing, which flourishes within the wisdom of our intelligent heart.

For many years I didn’t understand that the disasters in my life were my ticket to awakening. Sometimes when life becomes too challenging and the rug is ripped out from beneath us, there is nothing left to do but surrender. This is what happened to me, and in that surrender, The Grace Method emerged. Even after thirty years of meditating, I had no idea how much there was to surrender before deep healing could take place. Awakening, for me, has been a long and steady process. However, I now know, by using The Grace Method, that it doesn’t need to take as long for others to awaken. Living in Indian ashrams under the guidance of gurus helped the peace of presence become more intense and stable. The Grace Method cleared the way for a deeper perspective of life to emerge. Through workshops, online courses, and individual sessions, The Grace Method has now proved itself a powerful awakening tool for thousands of people. I have heard many say, ‘I can find peace and be present, but then frustration arises: how do I get rid of that?’ This book will not only demonstrate why negative emotions continue to arise even after awakening but explain step-by-step what to do about it. Consider The Grace Method as the tallest tree in the jungle. It will raise you up to get a new perspective on the jungle below, and gives you a clear path to the mountain top. From a higher perspective, your problems appear so much smaller.

This book discusses different levels of perception and the three levels of awakening. No-one likes to be told they have an ego, yet in the context delivered here, discovering the truth of the role your ego plays in your life can be the freeing of your mind. It’s essential to awaken to the ego, and this is the first level. When you learn how to avoid its traps, the second level—awakening to the Soul, or self-realisation—becomes easier. From there, your own inner guru can guide you to the final level of awakening known as enlightenment or non-duality. This book focuses on the first two levels. The ego can be tricky to navigate, and it may even be whispering in your ear right now all the reasons why you shouldn’t read this. The ego likes you to remain in the emotional and painful parts of your person and will do anything to avoid you waking up. It may also be the one preventing you from meditating deeply by keeping the monkey mind chattering in your head.

The three steps to personal transformation will explain what to do throughout your awakening journey. These three steps cover the different aspects of your being, and these are: the parts of your person that feel bad, the parts of your person that feel good, and your true Self. The Grace Method complements and is an integral part of these three steps. This book’s unique approach is filled with practical strategies and actions to implement at the end of each chapter.

This book alone can transform your life by giving you the principles and a deeper understanding of how the mind and ego works. However, completing the online Grace Method course is highly recommended to take you to the ultimate level of healing and awakening to your true Self. I feel this is so important and is why it is given to you as a free bonus with the purchase of this book. Therefore, be sure to make the most of it so you can apply The Grace Method accurately and with confidence.

The benefits of this powerful framework and method are compelling: clarity, peace of mind, being in the flow, not taking things personally, less stress, no fear of emotions, and a sense of freedom to be you is at your fingertips. You will not only learn more about yourself, but gain a deeper understanding of your relationships and how to help others if needed. Strengthening connections can lead to deeper intimacy, forgiveness, and compassion, and you will no longer fear the opinion of others. One who is aware of the deeper dimensions of life sees and feels the beauty in all there is, is calm in the midst of chaos, and lives in deep gratitude and love for others and the earth. The solution to the world’s problems is to have humanity wake up to their true nature. Our children don’t need to be yelled at to be calm and to concentrate; rather, a display of calm from others will naturally guide them. This book will show you how.

Expect to laugh, cry, and be shocked. At times, I guarantee you won’t believe what is said, and I don’t want you to believe anything, as there are some things the mind can’t grasp. Instead, feel it. Don’t think, but feel your way through this book. This in itself will connect you deeper to your heart, where your true Self flourishes. Understanding of your true Self will come when you surrender to who you think you are. Understanding becomes knowing. You will know who you are—this is the awakening, a silent revelation so disturbing to the mind that it may feel the agony of letting go of who you thought you were. This discovery unveils the love and the truth of your true Self. The ecstasy and bliss can then shine through the once-darkened clouds that surrounded you while deep in the forest floor. Perhaps it’s time to find the top of the mountain where the sun shines.

Read this book from start to finish. Each chapter builds upon the last, so don’t skip any. Before we discuss relationships, it’s best to understand your own person first. Read slowly. Contemplate the key messages outlined at the end of each chapter. Implementing the suggested steps at the end of each chapter will help you to embody and bring into your experience the insights and inner truths that arise as you awaken more and more.

By the time you digest this book, you may have avoided endless arguments, countless stressful times, worry, and upsets, and you won’t take things so personally. It can open you to your personal purpose and align you with what you want. So enjoy, discover, take it slowly, and notice your true Self emerge with a sense of joy and passion for life like never before. Enjoy the journey back home to YOU.

CHAPTER 1

The agony of our selves

The many different parts of you

There’s more to you than you would ever dare to show the world. You know that. When you meet someone, which part of you steps forward to say hello and which parts of you do you keep tucked away? There may be some parts of you that you only share with others when you get to know them well and feel comfortable with them. We’ve all got many different parts of us—our many ‘selves’. Some we keep a secret and others we allow to be quite social and we share them with the world. We’re all like this.

There may be parts of you that are very happy and parts of you that get very sad, or maybe other parts are frustrated, hurt, or angry. You may have parts of you that want to achieve your dreams, however, there may be other parts of you that give compelling reasons why you can’t. Maybe there’s a part of you that judges—you do indeed judge yourself, if not other people. We all do. You may have a part of you that likes to please others, or maybe there’s a lazy part of you that prevents you from doing anything.

Perhaps one part of you wants to eat the fruit salad, yet another part of you can’t get your eyes off the chocolate cake. There may also be part of you that worries about paying your bills, yet when you see that stunning outfit in the shop, another part of you jumps in and overrides that responsible part. However, it won’t take long for it to surface again, more concerned than ever.

You may be in a great relationship and love your partner, yet another part of you gets frustrated with them when they do those things that grate on your nerves. Or maybe you’re waiting to meet your elusive soulmate, yet another part of you knows that all the good ones are taken. You may have another part of you that likes to act the big kid, or maybe you know someone like that, and they never seem to grow up.

To help relieve any stress, worry, anxiety, or depression, you may take yourself off to a meditation class or have a relaxing bath, only to sit there with a storm going on in your head that simply won’t shut up. These parts of you can possess and take over your every action, habit, and addiction, and sabotage every effort to take control of your life. You know the truth in this when you don’t want that addiction or those destructive habits in your life, yet you continue to do them anyway, and it’s really hard to control them because one part of you still enjoys them.

These different parts of you make up your persona, your personality, or your selves. Carl Jung called them sub-personalities.¹ These parts of you are the different masks that you wear. They make up what we call the person or what you would call me. It’s who you identify yourself to be.

So what do these parts of your person have to do with transforming and freeing your mind? They have everything to do with it, and they’re mostly overlooked. Becoming aware of the many different parts of you is the first, massive step to awakening to your true Self. Capital S for Self signifies we are referring to the higher aspect of you, which is much greater than the person or your small selves.

You’re not who you think you are.

You are not the person, and this will become apparent when you understand the true nature of these many parts of you compared to your true Self. There is a world of difference. These parts of your person are the cause of your agony, stress, worry, doubt, and anything else that doesn’t feel good, whereas your true Self basks in happiness and a great love for life, regardless of what is happening. Yes, irrespective of your financial situation, your career path or lack of work, your relationships, or your state of health, your true Self remains untouched.

You’ve probably been advised to think positively, not to be negative, and to focus on being present. However, if you’re like many people, it’s not always that easy; not all parts of your person will ever agree. You may have little voices or thoughts in the back of your head who remind you of everything that could go wrong because of what’s happened in the past. They never give you a moment of peace. These are the parts of your person talking. Perhaps, like most people, you have already developed your person to such an extent that it completely hijacks you, and you’re left with your back to the wall, wondering if finding some peace of mind is even possible.

You may have learned various formulas and techniques attempting to get rid of your mind blockages, and you may have been putting all your efforts into trying to get rid of these negative thoughts and behaviours. However, these blockages are simply other parts of your person that have no intention of going anywhere. Your efforts to get rid of them may even make them hold on tighter.

You may have learned about the philosophy called the ‘Law of Attraction’, which suggests focusing your attention on what you want to manifest, and it will eventually appear. Why does it seem to work for some yet not at all for others? With all the best intentions, personal development can be very challenging. Why? What’s missing? Before you attempt to develop your person further, understanding and becoming aware of what your person really is and what to do about it could save you years of suffering.

All the fears, upsets, and worries you’ve ever had are contained within these parts of your person. If you don’t become fully conscious of these parts of you, it can be challenging to become aware of what lies beyond them. These parts of you cover up your true Self, which has no fear, no upsets, and not a worry in the world. Your true Self is within you, yet these different parts of your person have taken over because you weren’t taught this; you didn’t know, and it’s not your fault.

The multitude of rules and beliefs you took on board, with little or no choice from your family, friends, and society, has conditioned you. There are not too many parents and teachers who encourage children to dispute and rebel against the rules and belief systems of their society. You’ve most likely been subjected to an education system that does not teach or acknowledge the fundamentals of who you are and how to effectively use the body, mind, and energy system you’ve been blessed with.

You came with no user manual, and perhaps you didn’t always get the help you needed to navigate the real power you hold within you and what to do with it to make your life the most joyful and fulfilled you could imagine.

Whether they’re aware of it or not, most people yearn to come back to who they really are and live as their true Self, which is happy, joyful, peaceful, loving, caring, and compassionate. If you don’t know that as truth, or can’t feel that daily, it’s because these parts of your person are in the way; they’re covering up your true Self, and it’s time they are seen for what they are.

If you want Self-realisation, in order to know and experience your true peaceful Self, you have two choices: either go and meditate in a Himalayan cave for the next thirty years or understand the reality of these parts of you. Yes, some people have awoken spontaneously to their true Self, and in a heartbeat, they recognised the truth of reality and the illusion we are living in. However, for the majority of us, awakening from the agony of our person takes work and patience. Understanding and knowing how to deal with these parts of your person will fast-track your journey to awakening and knowing your true Self.

If you don’t feel your life has meaning because you have no idea why you’re here or what your purpose or inner calling is, again, it’s because these parts of you have bulldozed your ability to connect with who you really are. Your true Self knows precisely why you’re here and what you’ve come to experience and share with others.

Your past conditioning, which includes being told to think positively, may actually be holding you back and keeping you from enjoying life to its fullest. It’s not your fault or anyone else’s— it’s how humans have evolved. Fortunately, we are now in a time where people are awakening from the dysfunctional and unhelpful way we were taught about our mind, our thoughts, emotions, and our true nature. It’s time to consider a whole new world of possibilities—a new way of living and experiencing life.

What the parts of your person are made of

Every single part of your person has an opinion, which is based on its belief. Each different part of you also feels a certain way, depending on what that part of you believes. For example, if a part of you believes you can achieve success, then that part of you feels great. However, another part of you may believe it’s going to be hard, so this part of you may feel frustrated.

Every single part of your person will believe a certain thing, and depending on what that belief is, this part of you will feel a certain way. This is why some parts of you feel wonderful, yet others don’t feel so good at all. To put it simply, every single part of your person is made up of two things: a belief and an emotion. These parts of you also depend on or are influenced by memory, which we will discuss later. How many beliefs do you have? That’s how many parts of your person there are: countless! The combination of these parts is what makes you a unique individual.

Where do the parts of your person live?

When we look at each other, we see one another as one person. Yet within us, many different parts of us create the person we present to the world. When you combine all the different parts of you, along with memory, this creates your mind. What you refer to as your ‘person’ is all in your mind. Your mind is intertwined and filters through the form of your physical body.

Scientist Candace Pert demonstrates in her book Molecules of Emotion how every cell in your body contains your mind. Your beliefs and emotions are held in your cells throughout your whole body, and she often refers to it as our bodymind.²

I cannot separate the body from the mind.2

—Candace Pert, PhD

Your brain processes information that comes from not only your five basic senses (sight, sound, taste, touch, and smell) but also from other senses such as your sense of space, time, hunger, temperature, balance, body position, and movement.³ The brain also processes your thoughts, therefore it feels as if your thoughts are located in your head. It’s easily perceived that these parts of your person live in your head, yet in reality they reside in every cell of your body. We can therefore also refer to these parts of your person as the parts of your mind or the parts in your head.

Some people call the body a temple; however, for our purposes, let’s call it a house. Without your body, you cannot experience this world. Your body uses the senses to see, hear, smell, taste, and feel all that life has to offer you.

Even if you lose one or more of these senses due to a bodily malfunction, you are still here. You are not the body. You can remove an organ—or several organs—yet you will remain present within the body. You could lose a limb, or all limbs, yet you are still here. So if you’re not your organs or your limbs or your senses, how can you be the body? Your body is your house; it’s where you reside in this lifetime. You have a body, but it’s not who you are.

If we liken your body to a house, then the ‘living room’ would be where all the different parts of your person that are wide awake come in for a chat. Psychologists call this living room your ‘conscious mind’. You are conscious of these parts of you as they’re talking in the form of thoughts in your head, and some people can actually hear them. Because every single part of your person has a different opinion, sometimes these opinions clash badly. Arguments are not uncommon in any house, and the more crowded it is, the more likely the arguments will break out. You may notice these parts of your mind when you try to relax, meditate, or try to fall asleep, and generally, they don’t stop talking or arguing.

Sometimes these parts of you may carry on so much you don’t know which part to listen to; this is called ‘overwhelm’. When different parts of your person are in conflict—for example one part of you wants to go on a holiday, yet another part of you says you can’t because of the finances—this is called ‘confusion’. You simply don’t know which part of you to listen to.

Your conscious mind, or your living room, can get busy and very noisy. The loud parts of you can take over and not give the quieter parts of you a chance to say a word. They may not say much, but you can probably feel them. It can truly be a battlefield between these parts of your mind that are wide-awake.

Fortunately, not all parts of your person are awake at the same time. There are other parts of you asleep in the ‘bedrooms’. These parts only wake up occasionally when they hear something that triggers them, something they often don’t like to hear. They can awaken quite abruptly and jump out of bed, wide awake. An excellent example of this in action is when you may be happily driving along and suddenly another car cuts you off and almost causes an accident. Immediately road rage is present and active! The happy part in your head just got shoved aside while a very angry part surfaces immediately from the bedroom and is already yelling abuse at the idiot driver in front before you even think about it. Words instantly flew out of your mouth before you knew it. Psychologists call the bedrooms of your house the ‘subconscious mind’.

And finally, you have another room in your house deep down below—the ‘basement’. The basement accommodates all those parts of your person that you may feel embarrassed or shameful about or those that are simply too painful, and you most likely never want to think about them again. They often get pushed down so deep, and with the basement door shut tightly, you understandably forget all about them. After all, you want to move on with your life and leave that past behind. Psychologists call your basement your ‘unconscious mind’. You no longer have any conscious awareness that these parts of your mind are here at all, yet they become your shadows or your disowned selves.⁴

To sum it up, your conscious mind is the living room where parts of your person are wide awake, the subconscious mind is where the parts of you sleep in their bedrooms, and the unconscious mind holds those parts of you that you’d rather forget about, your basement.

Just as you have a body, yet you are not the body, so too, you have a mind, yet you are not the mind. You are not beliefs and emotions; there is so much more to you than that despite what your ego tells you.

The bouncer of your house

What would happen if every single part in your head expressed anything they wanted to at any time, to anyone? Imagine walking into your workplace and telling everyone exactly what you thought of them. Or even your friends or family members, what would they think if you spoke your mind? How long would they want to hang around you? What would they think of you?

If every single part of your person has an opinion, that’s a lot of different parts to take care of. This house could get totally out of control if all these parts of you were let loose. So you need a bouncer at the front door of your house—someone to protect and control every single part of you. We all have one, and he is called the ‘ego’.

Your ego will go to great lengths to ensure every part of you is protected.⁵ If there are parts of your person you couldn’t possibly show the world, the ego will send them to the basement. Your ego will not have you feeling ashamed or embarrassed, so these parts must be locked up and never let out. Your ego will then encourage any other part of your person that feels good to show itself to the world. This way, you will come across to others as a happy, positive person and not the embarrassed or shameful person that you may sometimes feel deep within you.

Your ego will ensure the parts of your person are kept under control and won’t allow some even to speak. Others he encourages to get loud and tell the world about what this part of you believes. Because each sub-personality has its own belief, ego will protect each one of them by ensuring that what you believe is shown to be true. What this means is ego is the boss of your mind until you consciously take over with full awareness of what’s really happening and the consequences of his meddling.

Your house needs power

Every house needs electricity to power it up, to turn on the lights, and bring it to life. Without this power, the house remains dark, cold, and empty.

The life-force energy flows into your body and powers up your physical body and every single part of your mind. Without this power, no part of your person can come to life. The life-force energy is the energy of life itself and is also known as prana, chi, or Shakti and it’s the fuel that brings everything to life. It is extraordinary and very powerful. Your true Self radiates this power.

If you’ve ever seen an animal or person die, you may have noticed what happens when their life-force energy leaves their body. The body becomes a shell, like an empty house with nothing in it. We then talk about the person that has died in the context they have passed away and what’s left is a body. We innately understand we are not the body. When we die and leave the body, it needs to be disposed of as it immediately begins to break down the moment that the life-force energy leaves it. You can look at the body and know that the person you once knew is now gone.

So the body—as well as the many parts of your person—is nothing without the life-force energy. You may have heard about the chakra system in your body, the energy centres. Chakras can be likened to the power points of your house where each point brings power and, therefore, life into a specific area within the house.

Your body is your house: an empty shell unless the life-force energy of your true Self brings it to life with its power. Your true Self radiates all the best things about you—joy, happiness, passion, as well as peace, calm, and silence, and ultimately, life itself. Your true Self is all of that, and if you have ever felt deep peace, joy, calm, or happiness, then this is telling you that these feelings are within you. You may not have felt them for a long time, yet they’re there and always ready to be awakened again, just as they were when you were an innocent child.

Your true Self can also be referred to as your Soul, and your heart is the gateway in which the Soul radiates the life-force energy, bringing the experience of life into this world. Connecting with and living from the joyful being of your heart and Soul is discussed in detail in later chapters, as it’s a natural side effect of becoming aware of the many parts of your person. Just as the power of your true Self brings your body to life, it also brings your mind to life. If you’re not aware of where you’re directing your life-force energy, it can also bring to life those parts of your person that feel bad and are holding you back.

Roles are different from the parts of your person

It can be very easy at this point to confuse the roles that you play and the many parts of your person, yet they are two separate things. Remember, every single part of your person represents a belief that you are holding onto. In any role you play, many different beliefs can surface, which means many different parts of your person can be engaged.

For example, let’s take the role of a parent. As a parent, there will be a part of your person that is very loving and nurturing and believes wonderful things about