The NICE Handbook: A practical guide to be better people for a better world.

By Don Baptiste

A few years ago, Don Baptiste started noticing that more and more, people were treating each other not so nicely. From the office where people wouldn't say hello, to the road where people would cut each other off and express road rage, things just didn't seem as pleasant as they once had been.

Don believes we can do better. Bei

• Language: English
• Publisher: Palmetto Publishing
• Release date: Jun 1, 2022
• ISBN: 9781685155308

Don Baptiste

Formerly an executive in all aspects of HR, and having worked across various industries and in countries around the world, Don Baptiste is the founder and current principal of Baptiste Consulting, a human resources firm focused primarily on leadership coaching, team effectiveness, talent management, change management, and employee engagement strategies. He has extensive experience in helping C-suite executives, boards, and board committees navigate organizational restructuring, high profile employee relations issues, succession planning opportunities, as well as ethics and employee experience initiatives. For over 25 years, Don has completed successful coaching engagements with emerging leaders across various functions such as IT, finance, engineering and sales.The focus of Don's doctoral studies was in leadership and coaching, and his dissertation centered on emotional intelligence with an emphasis on empathy. The center of his passion has been in helping individuals and organizations be happier and more productive. He has observed behavior all over the world and uses that experience to help all types of people in various settings.

Book preview

PREFACE

T

he idea of this book actually came to me a couple years ago when I was contemplating a departure from corporate office life. What I began to observe and realize was a continuing trend of people either being indifferent to each other, or even worse, not nice.

What is nice anyway? There are many ways to describe nice. That artwork looks nice,, nice job,, that person is so nice,, etc. According to Merriam- Webster, nice is an adjective defined as:; agreeable, pleasant, appropriate and/or well, executed. For purposes of this book, nice will relate to pleasant, or in other words, kind. To further define:; kind will relate to the adjective of being sympathetic, and helpful versus the noun relating to type or category. In other words, being kind to others, versus what kind of car one has.

Once again, a couple years ago, I started to notice how people treat each other, often not so nicely, on an increasingly frequent basis. Whether it was in the office where people wouldn’t say hello or on the roads during a commute where people would cut each other off and express road rage. Things just didn’t seem as happy as they once were.

One episode in particular struck me when I was in a grocery store. I was waiting in the checkout line when a man in front of me was acting very grumpy towards the cashier as the person in front of him was trying to pay by personal check and was taking a long time. Once this man in front of me had his turn in line, he abruptly grabbed his bags from the cashier and as he walked away with his cart, he removed the bags and pushed the empty cart into the cashier's counter. This action clearly affected the cashier and others in the immediate area. I watched this and took it upon myself to say something and the dialogue went like this: ME:That wasn’t very nice. MAN: What?? ME: Pushing the cart like you did wasn’t very nice. MAN: I didn’t mean it. ME: Don’t you think you should apologize to the cashier? MAN: OK, I’m sorry." The man left, and a few people clapped about the exchange. The change in mood in the area was noticeable.

Please understand, I am anything but perfect when it comes to being nice, so please don’t take this story as a pat on the back for me. In fact, I have been pretty terrible on occasions like this when I become impatient. The point is, none of us are perfect and everyone has a bad day, but we can all do better. Being not so nice clearly has an impact on people, and I’ve found that being outwardly nice also has an impact. It's amazing how one interaction, nice or not nice, can change someone's mood for an entire day. This should answer the question; Why bother being nice?

After observing these kinds of interactions, even with family and friends, a pandemic hit the world and social unrest surfaced unlike anything many of us have seen in a long time. I also began to observe bad behavior as a means by which to be nicer by knowing what not to do. It occurred to me that maybe now is the time to actually write down some of my thoughts from a couple years ago, perhaps even better informed by recent events. It seems that if there were ever a time to help others be nicer to each other, it is now.

When the pandemic started, I began to see signs of people reaching out to each other to help in times of need, and folks seemed to place higher value on others as they were apart and suffering. That said, after some time passed it seemed as though that magic wore off, and people started to treat each other badly again