Black Rose

By Rufus Avery

Black Rose: Poetry Collections Book By: Rufus Avery (Pseudonym: Ne'More)

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu.com
• Release date: Apr 3, 2022
• ISBN: 9781458305473

Book preview

Dedications

This book is dedicated to those who have been through what I’ve been through. All the losses, let downs and broken promises along with the bad choices on our behalf that led us to take life with a grain of salt. Through it all, we decided and made choices for the better and worst part of our lives.

Some of us learned and progressed towards maturity while others never changed and dove more into darkness. I used that same darkness to see the light and I hope those who read this poetry book take a journey through my mind, my eyes and my life as you walk in my shoes.

Introduction

Thank you for purchasing Black Rose. This book was written through one of the most difficult times in my life. Pain drove me through life because of the love it showed me, the truth it allowed me to see and it helped mold me into the man I am today. I hope you enjoy Black Rose as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Ne’more

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Sleep is the cousin of death and it’s waiting,

And you can’t keep it real with niggaz they call it hating. Plus, the people around me somehow became complacent,

So, I kept my thoughts to myself and never made a statement. My hearts been vacant from purposes unrelated,

I know you wish I failed and prayed I wouldn’t make it. I’ve been placed in bad spaces on a case-by-case basis, Told to remain calm but I ran out of my patience.

Ancient… is that person that I once was,

And I would have never gave the wrong people my love. Where were the hugs when I needed a little comfort?

A shoulder to cry on when the world doesn’t want you? Tomorrow is far away and the stars seem so distant,

But once everything is aligned there is always something that’s missing. I never listened to the voice that always told me to share,

Cause all the time they rejected the naked soul I bared. It’s rare that you will ever hear me mention,

All the love you’s I said truthfully, I didn’t.

I guess my heart wasn’t in it cause you ripped it out of my chest, Once the love is gone the hate is all that’s left.

Death… is the sweetest of the sweetest,

And heaven is the place that simply doesn’t see us. Hell is the life I’m simply use to living,

And a chance is something I’m not simply used to getting.

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Every pain I ever felt prepared me for this moment, And every door I left closed I eventually had to open. Hold it… now I think I really got it,

But the hatred from it all made it hard for me to hide it. Divide it and everything shall be conquered,

Those years inside a cage turned me into a monster. Plus, the voices in my head said that I was pretty fine, But it's hard to get ahead when playing from behind.

And when your light doesn’t shine the darkness will protect you, And when you stand on your own, they don’t really respect you. Patience tries to test you but my journey remains unbroken, And the words I never said will eventually remain unspoken.

The anger I’ve been holding I just took it for what it was,

I hope you never see my rage and all the damage that it does. All the pain from the love I so desperately tried to grab,

And all the laughs I never had traveling this path.

It’s messed up they never asked or cared how I was doing, Those long nights I sat in silence cause my life was up in ruins. I was pursuing the happiness that never came,

This is a make or miss life and I decided to change.

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I’m afraid to let you know that I’m my own worst critic, I plead guilty to it all and all that came with it.

Family ends up faded and strangers started to come in,

Broken promises became shattered and shattered dreams became nothing’s. Umm… life is one of the coldest,

I lost my best friend then and now I lost my oldest. I hope you never feel the feeling of losing a child,

I apologize for my decisions that I’m facing right now. Wow… I never thought that for a second,

I thought I always had time to sit down and correct it.

Tell Nikki that I’m sorry for the worst decision that I made, Hoping one day I can tell her to her face.

I had plans to fix it all but I guess god’s plans were different, U lose the ones u love and always wish u didn’t.

Damn I wish I’d listened then I wouldn’t have regrets,

I could have loved a lot more and gave a little more respect.

Then maybe this wouldn’t have happened but who am I really kidding, Looking back at the younger me truthfully, I was tripping.

I often tried to distance myself from my own