S.T.A.R.S: Setting Time Aside for Renewal of Self

By Natasha Field

An integral part of attaining a healthy mental state is believing that we are important and that we matter in life. Learning to value the self while recognizing how the actions of others impact us are valuable tools in personal growth and discovery.

In a guide to renewing the self, seasoned therapist Natasha Field introduces PRESSME, a seven-point model that leads participants to explore all the physical, relational, emotional, social, spiritual, mental, and environmental aspects that grow and develop self-esteem—an essential ingredient in liking oneself. Within her innovative model, Natasha helps others better understand their thoughts, feelings, and emotions through introspective questions and action steps that transform interactions with the world and increase self-awareness and love. Each section includes practical suggestions that encourage those on a journey of self-discovery to embrace their uniqueness, believe that they do matter, and ultimately become a bright star that inspires others to do the same.

STARS is a guide to self-renewal that leads others on a personal journey within to explore the mind, body, and spirit while learning how to positively interact with the world.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse UK
• Release date: Nov 3, 2021
• ISBN: 9781665593120

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© 2021 Natasha Field. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or

transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse  11/02/2021

ISBN: 978-1-6655-9313-7 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-6655-9312-0 (e)

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in

this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views

expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the

views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible, New

International Version®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International

Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. [Biblica]

Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

—Romans 12:2 (NIV)

CONTENTS

Introduction

Chapter 1   Setting Time Aside for Renewal of Self (STARS)

Chapter 2   Physical

Chapter 3   Relational

Chapter 4   Emotional

Chapter 5   Social

Chapter 6   Spiritual

Chapter 7   Mental

Chapter 8   Environmental

Chapter 9   Flow

Conclusion

Appendix

Acknowledgements

INTRODUCTION

This book is about you. That’s right, you.

It is about different aspects of yourself. It is about how you see yourself and things that affect that. It is about your beliefs and the expectations you have of yourself, as well as the feelings you have towards you and your identity. So when I talk about ‘self’ in this book, I mean you.

You are self.

You are important; there will only ever be one you. You are the only you who has ever existed. You are unique, a one-off, special, and precious. You really are one of a kind. No one has existed before you with your specific DNA and set of strengths and weaknesses. And it goes without saying that no one will exist in the future who is quite like you.

There is only one you and you matter. You really do. Others matter to you, don’t they? So why wouldn’t you matter?

This is a book about others around you. It is about how they affect you, your actions, and your beliefs. It’s about how they treat you and what you do, or do not allow. The renewal process often involves re-evaluation of this. It is about separating who you know you are from who they think you are and learning to trust your own understanding of yourself. Learning to value the self. Learning to recognize how others’ actions impact you.

Others may, or may not, have acknowledged your uniqueness, but the fact is, it is still the truth. You are unique.

You are you, not them. They are them, not you. It is your responsibility to choose you, to highlight you, to value you, and to renew you, just as it is their responsibility to experience their own renewal processes and choose themselves. If we allow or even expect others to try and renew us, it simply does not work. The work is ours. And the best project you’ll ever work on is you.

When I decided to work on me, I began to change. It seemed to help if I saw myself as a project, and it became a challenge but a bit of an exciting one. A big, important one. I had to make the choice to learn to understand why I acted, thought, and felt some of the ways that were quite self-detrimental. It did not happen overnight; it was a process. But it happened. And I hope and believe it will continue to happen because renewal is a process, you see. It takes time. It takes quite a few things, actually, but I will talk more about this in the chapters ahead.

Get excited. Renewal is around the corner.

This is a book about the world around you. It is about your immediate surroundings and wider environment, and how they can impact you in negative or positive ways. There is beauty all around us to see and experience, but do you make time in your life to do that? Probably not as life is busy, and it’s so easy to take for granted. You are worth experiencing the beauty around you. If you don’t believe you are worth that, or that the world surrounding you can make a difference, think again. It can and it does. Oh, the beauty. And you are a part of that beauty too. You contribute to it, and you are it. Beauty is all around us if we look and want to see it. That goes for beauty within ourselves too. That is what needs renewal—the desire to see beauty out there and within too.

You are a miracle.

That’s right, I said you are a miracle. Seems a tad dramatic to you? Well I urge you to think about the body itself for one minute. Your body. How many amazing processes does it go through completely naturally without our focus or consideration? It strives to live. It functions with sheer brilliance. It keeps the miracle of you alive!

And the same goes for the world around us. Seasons come and go. They do their things regardless of us. The leaves on the trees change, displaying a variety of gorgeous seasonal colours. They just do this. They get on with it. They renew. It’s quite amazing, really. They are constantly renewing and changing, and there is such truth to the statement, ‘This too shall pass.’ They focus on selves, their processes. Things just pass; they acknowledge change and just do it. Beautiful. Accepting. Peaceful.

This is also a book about renewal. We renew all the time in our bodies, as already mentioned. This type of renewal is unconscious and natural. Yet renewal is also about making new decisions that lead us to take different actions and exhibit different behaviours. Renewal of self is a vital process if we want change, and it’s often about working with who we are and what we’ve got by choosing alternative avenues and making new decisions that replace less helpful ones. It’s true that we can indeed be our own worst enemies, so we must make a decision for this to change. The decision alone is just the start, but it is absolutely essential to carry this through. Not much can really occur without a full-hearted decision to renew when we are considering thoughts, feelings, and behaviours.

Renewal often involves looking at the present to acknowledge the desired change and action to make something new, or as we know it, renew. By the way, the cover of this book shows a rainbow renewed. I have slightly switched the order of colours to demonstrate that sometimes we need a little renewal.

You want something different. What do you want? Only you, being the unique soul that you are, can fully identify what you want and, therefore, what you want to renew. Again I encourage you to ask yourself, ‘What do I want?’

Our desires are present in our everyday lives, but only you can give them the attention they require to become your reality. In the past we may have expected others to make them happen. They cannot. They wouldn’t even know where to start because they are not you.

And you have power to make those changes. We must make the effort to renew the relationship with self in order to attain the goals we have set.

Because you matter. If we want something different, we often must do something different. It really is as simple as that.

We also age. I’m pointing out the obvious here, but in the ageing process, it is important to renew. It’s actually all about renewal if we let it be. It’s about accepting different truths about yourself and to adjust to life accordingly. For example, things you may want now may be very different from what you strove for twenty years ago. Renew your desires in the present to the present. Get fresh with yourself; renew today.

This book is about a process—STARS. Of course it is. It is the title of the book! It is about acknowledging that we are all stars in our own rights to become the best we can be.

You shine. You matter.

Each and every star, like us, is individual and shines in its own right. There are constellations, like we have communities, but each one has its own shine, its own sparkle, and is part of a beautiful vision in the night sky. They glow and shine in their own glory, and it is not their aim to outshine or hide from one another. They just do their things, and they shine. This book is about that. About you finding you and renewing the parts of you that you want or need to renew.

In this book I cover seven aspects of self—or you—which I believe are vital to consider when looking to renew or change. The following components of self are looked at in this book: physical, relational, emotional, social, spiritual, mental, and environmental—PRESSME (the PRESSME model, 2021).

Seven of the nine chapters are dedicated to these aspects of self, or you. From this point I refer to the seven-point PRESSME renewal model as a list of these facets which impact the person you are and affect your thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. The model also helps you to understand and renew how you interact with the world, as well as how you perceive yourself and how able you are to embrace your uniqueness. And this really must be the aim—to embrace the unique soul you are created to be because it is the truth. There really is only one you. You matter.

You may notice I repeat this point quite frequently. That is because it is something you really need to grasp, really get your head around, and accept.