Narcissistic Abuse The Ultimate Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Workbook

By John Range

People with a narcissistic personality disorder often seem to not really love themselves. Actually, they're driven by shame. It's the idealized image of themselves, which they convince themselves they embody, that they admire. But deep down, narcissists and people with NPD feel the gap between the façade they show the world and their shame-based self. They work hard to avoid feeling that shame.

This gap is true for other codependents, but a narcissist uses defense mechanisms that are destructive to relationships and cause pain and damage to their loved ones' self-esteem.

Some narcissists' coping mechanisms can be abusive — hence the term "narcissistic abuse." However, someone can be abusive, but not be a narcissist. Addicts and people with other mental illnesses, such as bipolar disorder, antisocial personality disorder (sociopathy), and borderline personality disorders, are abusive. So are many codependents without a mental illness? Abuse is abuse, no matter the abuser's diagnosis.

Suppose you're in a relationship with a narcissist. In that case, it's essential to get outside support to understand clearly what's going on, to rebuild your self-esteem and confidence, and to learn to communicate effectively and set boundaries.

This book will help you to make changes. If you feel in danger, don't believe in broken promises. Get immediate help, and read "NARCISSISTIC ABUSE - The Ultimate Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Workbook."

• Language: English
• Publisher: vincenzo nappi
• Release date: Sep 19, 2021
• ISBN: 9798201979638

Book preview

VOLUME I

Introduction

PERSONALITY TRAITS distinguish people from one another, and they are one of the things that make us human. Indeed, if we were all the same, then it is unlikely that we would be amazed by the great works of art we see in museums or by the incredible works of literature that spring up from all around the world. But some personality traits can be problematic. Narcissistic personality types are not only difficult to deal with but are also dangerous, especially if you are in a relationship. For those individuals in a relationship with a narcissist or worried that they might be, it is important to understand just what this personality type is and how to deal with it.

The term narcissist is thrown around a lot. Indeed, this term may be heard on talk shows, in magazine articles, and in news stories on the internet, and it is often used to describe people who are selfish and who behave outrageously and unpredictably. In reality, the term describes a personality trait (or a series of traits) that has been labeled a personality disorder by the medical community. These traits have been labeled this way because narcissists can behave pathologically, which means that they can be predictable at times, and people who behave this way should be handled with caution.

Narcissism refers to the trait of behaving without regard for others, placing one’s desires over the desires of others, and doing harm to others for selfish reasons. Narcissistic people are, therefore, not only selfish but also behave in a way that appears to observers to be wantonly cruel and lacking empathy. Indeed, the lack of empathy is one of the major characteristics of the narcissist, although there is a lot more to the empathy story than meets the eye. It is important to discuss empathy because the reader may find that they are not only capable of behaving in a narcissistic way but may also often behave in this way without realizing it.

Empathy is the ability to feel the subjective feelings and experiences of others. Empathy is often confused with sympathy, which represents the capacity to feel compassion and have tolerance for others. Empathetic people feel sympathy as well but take this a step further by feeling the emotions of others as if they, too, had lived the same experiences. Narcissists lack empathy, but sometimes, ordinary people lack empathy as well. The homeless debate in the United States may be thought of as an example of this. Some communities have criminalized homelessness rather than address the societal issues that are causing an explosive increase in homelessness even though the economic picture is said to be improving.

Empathy is often thought of as a defining characteristic of human beings, but the story may be more complex than it first appears. Human beings can feel empathy, but human beings also can behave in ways that are unsavory and which demonstrate a peculiar lack of empathy. Indeed, many books have been written on the subject of so-called dark psychology to unlock the reasons that human beings behave in dark, sinister ways even though empathy is supposedly a hallmark of people.

What empathy really represents is the ability of human beings to form close connections with one another emotionally. Empathy is a component of emotional intelligence, which is one of the several bits of intelligence that human beings possess (if one subscribes to the multiple intelligence models in psychology, that is). Individuals who behave narcissistically are said to lack emotional intelligence, behaving without awareness of the feelings of others, and thinking only of themselves. But narcissists also use the emotions of others against them, which requires some degree of emotional sensitivity to others. How can it be that narcissists can be both emotionally aware and cruel?

The key to understanding why narcissists do what they do has something to do with the concept of motivation. This is a psychological idea that will be explored in this book. As human beings, we can be motivated to help others (behave altruistically), or we can be motivated to behave solely in terms of our own desires and needs and without regard for others (behaving narcissistically). There are also circumstances in which people may recognize that there are rules that should be followed ordinarily but believe that they are one of the chosen few who are positioned to ignore the rules, even if this means harming others. This is regarded by some as a Machiavellian personality trait, reflecting ideas that Renaissance writer Machiavelli explored 500 years ago.

When you are dealing with someone who is out to harm you, you may not care whether the person is a narcissist, psychopath, or a Machiavellian type, but it is important to make the distinction. As we touched briefly a few moments ago, narcissists do have some degree of emotional awareness and sensitivity; they may just choose to behave as if they did not. Some narcissists may have less emotional awareness because they are so fixated on their own motivations. For the person dealing with these sorts of people, it becomes important to form a defense against their tactics, and this includes really understanding how these personality types operate.

You likely have had to deal with narcissists in your daily life, whether it is in a romantic or familial relationship or the workplace. The truth is that narcissists are all around us. Indeed, it has been alleged that narcissism may actually be on the rise, which is an assertion that seems to be gaining support, especially as incidents of online abuse and bullying become more common and more talked about. Some may not think of this type of behavior as narcissism, but it lies on the spectrum of personality traits that include narcissistic behavior. Acts of abuse and bullying are representative of a thought process in which one person believes that their desire to attack or to satisfy a dark urge or motivation is more important than the safety or concern of others.

This situation of lack of empathy in the modern context, especially in terms of bullying or other group forms of abuse, muddies the waters of the narcissism discussion because narcissists are often thought of as acting solo. Indeed, people with personality disorders are generally thought of as having difficulty interacting socially, which is part of what makes their disorder dysfunctional for them. The idea of a society with a personality disorder, or a large number of people acting maliciously, stumbles into the territory of dark psychology, a subject that will be touched on as it relates to narcissists and narcissistic personality disorder.

If you are reading this, then it is because you need help and may be dealing with a narcissist in your life or you want to be prepared should you ever meet one. In Narcissistic Abuse: Guide to Recognizing Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Recovering from a Toxic Relationship and Taking Back Your Life, you will learn how to identify narcissists, narcissistic behavior, and other related personality types to protect yourself from the harm that they can do to you. Whether the narcissistic behavior you encounter is from one person or a group, you need to be prepared to defend yourself in every way that you can.

The best first step in defending against narcissistic abuse is understanding what it is. The narcissist may act without regard to your feelings, but he or she can get a read on them. The narcissist may have a goal that causes them to disregard your feelings, or they may derive pleasure from tormenting you. Whatever the case may be, you need to understand what narcissism is and how narcissists operate to get a sense of what you can do differently. Wearing your heart on your sleeve or immediately trying to form an emotional connection with someone you should not perhaps trust, these are all ways that a narcissist can walk right in and abuse you.

Approaching narcissistic abuse from the standpoint of definitions will be undertaken in the first chapter. The second chapter will explore why narcissists exist at all. This is a controversial subject as psychologists are not always in agreement when it comes to the topic of human motivation. Most in the field have distanced themselves from Freudian psychoanalysis toward a more Adlerian approach, but some would argue that Freud still has a place in the world of psychoanalysis and psychotherapy today. In the second chapter, the idea of what motivates narcissists and why society produces narcissists will be explored.

An important step for the reader is learning how to recognize a narcissist. Part of what makes this particular subject so difficult to address is the idea that narcissistic behavior is not only common and has been around as long as there have been human beings, but modern society may encourage narcissistic behavior in various ways. You can learn to recognize the narcissist, but what do you do when everyone around you behaves narcissistically? This aspect of the matter is an extension of the idea of how psychology approaches narcissism, and it is one of the topics that will be covered further in the third chapter.

Any personality where a man or woman acts without regard for others or in a destructive manner will be difficult to deal with, especially in a relationship, but there are differences. Indeed, when it comes to psychiatric diagnoses, narcissistic personality disorder is generally grouped with the related disorders of antisocial personality disorder and borderline personality disorder. In the more theoretical, self-help direction, narcissism is often grouped with Machiavellianism and psychopathy in the so-called dark triad. All of these conditions are related to narcissism, but they have their differences. In the fourth chapter, you will be equipped to tell if you are dealing with a narcissist or a person with a different type of disorder.

This naturally leads to the subject of psychopathy. A psychopath is another term that is often overused or misused. Indeed, psychiatry has tended to distance itself from this term, choosing instead to work with quantities that it can better understand and study. In the fifth chapter, the idea of what a psychopath is and how a psychopath is different from a narcissist will be explored. The person that you call a narcissist may, in fact, be demonstrating signs of psychopathy. The narcissist is calculating and aware, but the psychopath may behave as if they are unable to control themselves or have no motivation at all; that would be a sinister one. You need to know if you are dealing with a psychopathic person.

Someone who is in a relationship with a narcissist and is self-aware enough to see the signs may have some exposure to the effects of narcissism, but even they may discover that there are aspects of these types of dysfunctional relationships that they miss. When all is said and done, the narcissist believes that their concerns and motivations are more important than your own, and they may engage in acts designed to leave you emotionally weakened and vulnerable. The effects of this type of abuse may be below the surface, and the only signs may be a sense of sadness, exhaustion, or confusion. In the sixth chapter, you will learn to recognize the effects of narcissistic abuse.

Interacting with a narcissist will be fraught with danger because you will never be certain whether the person you are dealing with is using against you what you tell them or what you share with them emotionally. Indeed, those who study dark psychology know that men and women versed in mind control have techniques that they use to induce rapport and control, putting them in a better position to destroy you. In order not to be destroyed, you need to learn how you can deal with a narcissist in your life. It is not always possible to distance yourself from them, so you need to understand the other tricks that you can

Reviews for Narcissistic Abuse The Ultimate Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Workbook

[David L-C · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

The content was informative although repetitive. Grammar left a lot to be desired. It seemed like the script was AI generated at times and therefore difficult to follow. If you are willing to overlook the poor sentence construction, usual language usage, and phrases that often don't make any sense, then there will be some benefit in the content for you.