What Has You Stuck?: The Whys Behind Your Delayed Destiny

By Dr. Vickie A. Dexter

If you feel there is something more for you to do in this thing called life, but you cannot figure out how to move forward, then you are not alone.

Dr. Vickie has felt the exact same way, and though she did not realize it at the time, God was keeping her still because she needed to address some issues before moving forward.

Filled with scriptures, the book contains numerous exercises to help you identify areas in your life that need attention and how to figure out the WHYS behind your seemingly delayed destiny.

Drawing on her own experiences and the Bible’s teachings, she helps you:

• improve relationships with family and friends;

• challenge preconceptions and prejudices;

• share your personal story to advance God’s kingdom; and

• recognize what’s truly important in life.

In this book, she shares how an incredible destiny was waiting for her even when she was asking the question, “Why can’t I move forward?”

While you may be questioning God, if you believe in Him and do what He wants you to do, you’ll achieve wonderful things. Realize its up to you and make a change with the godly lessons in What Has You Stuck?

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Aug 31, 2018
• ISBN: 9781973634973

Dr. Vickie A. Dexter

Dr. Vickie worked a full-time job while raising two daughters and a son. At the same time, she earned master’s and doctoral accounting degrees and participated in various areas of ministry. After dedicating her life to the Lord in 2001, she experienced change through the years that transformed her life as the Holy Spirit brought issues to her attention. During a period of meditation, God revealed His plan for this book, which discusses His organized way to attain Christian maturity and the WHYS that keep people stuck. To add credibility to the topics she covers, God took Dr. Vickie on a 12-year journey introducing her to various pastors, teachers and friends. They each played an important role in the various lessons presented in this book. She soon realized pastors do not teach all things relating to healing and maturing in Christ. In addition, she earned a Certificate in Women’s Ministries through the American Association of Christian Counselors as well as Certification as a Stephen Minister. Finally, she was heavily involved in ministerial areas such as finance, welcome teams, intercessory prayer, women’s ministries and single parent groups.

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Copyright © 2018 Dr. Vickie A. Dexter.

Keeland Williams for the cover artwork and the drawing of Jesus on page 109

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Scripture taken from the NEW AMERICAN STANDARD BIBLE®, Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

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ISBN: 978-1-9736-3498-0 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-3499-7 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-3497-3 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2018908811

WestBow Press rev. date: 8/29/2018

YOU HAVE A PURPOSE

Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,

And before you were born I consecrated you.

(Jeremiah 1:5 NAS)

These are the words God spoke to Jeremiah, but because God is omniscient, He knew you too!

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As each one has received a special gift, employ it in serving one another as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. (1 Peter 4:10 NAS)

Yes, even you! His Word says, each one has gifts inside him or her to serve the Lord. You are worthy of whatever He has called you to do!

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You have not done anything that will keep you from His love and what He wants you to do through you!

God has a specific purpose for you! He determined what it was before you were even born! You may think you are not worthy, but you are! God knew you were going to do that thing last year, last summer, or even last night. The wonderful thing about God is that He knows everything you have done, that are doing right now, and that you will do in the future—yet He still has plans for you! He takes what we think is unforgiveable and uses it for His glory. All of the struggles and challenges we face—whether they are our fault or someone else’s—are used to determine what our futures hold and the lives we touch. He takes the decisions we made and actions we took and turns them around for others to learn from. You may even know how God wants to use you, but you do not see it in your immediate future.

Do you feel stuck? Do you feel there is something more for you to do, but you just cannot move forward? If you are like what I was, there is a lot of junk keeping you still, but you do not realize it. God may have you still because these things need to be addressed before He allows you to move forward to do the work He has for you to do. You may even know what that work is, but no doors are opening—and no resources are available.

This book may help you! Will you read through this book to determine what has you stuck? Will you continue reading so that you can ascertain why you have you been in the same spot for quite some time? You are not reading this message for nothing. I encourage you to first pray for God to open up your heart for the truth and then delve in with your heart open for God’s grace and wisdom to enter. There is purpose in this thing we call life, and you may or may not know this purpose. It is time to move forward toward God’s will for your life and make a difference! Will you join me?

It may take some time to get through this book. It will take time to really understand you and what is holding you back. This is not a quick read—and then you are fixed. Time is needed for prayer, meditation, revelation, forgiveness, healing, and whatever else is needed for God to know you are ready! However, this journey is well worth it! God promises it! He laid out a specific race for you. He is saying, Let Me help you, and let Us get this work done! But, for now, He is saying, Let Me help you fix your thoughts on Me—and use the past for My glory!

LESSONS LEARNED

Twelve years and seven senior pastors later, God finally brought this project together! Life has been a whirlwind of so many emotions: love, hate, anger, forgiveness, jealousy, adoration, laziness, and steadfastness, just to name a few. In the lives of my children and me, 2004 was a pivotal year. I really began to feel, see, and hear the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit as each worked together as one in my life.

That year began with my fortieth birthday—and the death of my children’s father the very next day. Celebrating life and death is what we should be doing every day, right?

Celebrating death? you may ask.

Yes, when someone is taken away at a younger-than-expected age, the Lord is saving them from this world and all its troubles (Isaiah 57:1).

The following month, I made a commitment to God because I loved Him too much to continue living in sin. That commitment still holds true! A few months later, God helped me heal from my past and gave me visions of my future, which included a pastor for a husband. A few months after that, the Holy Spirit rained down on me with a force and love that surpassed anything I had ever experienced!

Therefore, I give glory and honor to God for the amazing ways he teaches, encourages, heals, and keeps us going. I want to thank my kids for always being themselves! There are four basic personalities that are expressed in various theories about human nature. We had all four under one roof, which made life extremely challenging—but God!

During this twelve-year journey, I was honored to get to know seven senior pastors and some of their staffs. That was the hardest part of this journey. Each time God said it was time to move to the next lesson, I cried. Each time I communicated with the pastors about God’s desire, I received their blessing and went on to the next challenge, many times dragging my feet. However, as I reflect on those years, I made some wonderful friends and did not want to leave—but God!

I came to realize that God was teaching through various pastors because not all pastors teach all things. Before this journey began, God placed me in my home church where I developed a wonderful foundation in Jesus Christ. That was where I learned to study and really know our wonderful Lord and Savior.

At times during this journey, God took me back home to obtain encouragement in specific ways. Each church family had a specific purpose and time frame to bring the topics of this book all together. If I were someone looking at me, I would wonder, Did she really hear from God with all those moves?

One time, I was adamant about making sure I was leaving because I heard God correctly and not because my feelings were hurt. I prayed and asked God to confirm this through a minister. One Sunday came and went, but the next Sunday was different. As the guest speaker was reading the chapter and verse she was about to teach about, I read the following:

Now, Lord, You are releasing Your bond-servant to depart in peace, according to Your word. (Luke 2:29)

I stopped and just stared at the scripture for a moment. You might be saying, Vickie, you asked Him to let you know through a minister. Shortly after I read it, I reminded Him of the same thing. He directed me to back up and find out who said it. It was Simeon, a righteous and devoted man filled with the Holy Spirit. He is the one who dedicated Jesus to the Lord. In my own mind, the minister was one of my friends, but I was not that specific. God chose one of his special ministers to give me my confirmation! He is amazing!

Yes, thoughts of what others might think crossed my mind many times. I finally came to realize that this life is not about what others think about me—it is about what Jesus did for me! As the songwriter Ray Boltz put it, I want to live all You died for me to be! Therefore, I live as holy as I can because of what took place when He died over more than two-thousand years ago.

He took my sin on that cross. He bore the pain I should have suffered! Nothing else should matter but being obedient to this wonderful King! He made the ultimate sacrifice. His Father paid the ultimate price of sacrificing one Child for all of us! Desires and directives were placed in my heart because of what He wants to accomplish through me. I could not let the what-are-people-going-to-think questions deter the journey He laid out. I had to be obedient! Do I live a perfect life? Absolutely not! But God!

This book is not about the different ideologies and variances between churches. It’s about being human! It’s about what is inside you that might be keeping you in bondage. It gives you some divinely inspired wisdom from various sources to help you on your journey toward allowing God to work His plan through you.

CONTENTS

You Have A Purpose

PART 1: HOLY TRINITY

Spirit, Soul, And Body

Reflection On The Spirit

The Soul

Sexual Sin

Letting Go And Letting God

Missy’s Story

Reflection On The Soul

Seven Steps To A Cleaner Soul

The Body

The Natural Body And Stress

My Physical Journey

Reflection On The Body

Maintenance Of The Spirit-Soul-Body Connection

PART II: HOLY LIVING

Holy Living

1 Thessalonians 1

Reflection On Attitude

1 Thessalonians 2

Reflection On Work

1 Thessalonians 3

Reflection On Affliction And Suffering

Reflection On Deliverance

1 Thessalonians 4

Reflection On Christ’s Return

1 Thessalonians 5

Reflection On Christian Conduct

PART III: HOLY SPIRIT

The Power Of The Holy Spirit

Reflection On The Holy Spirit

PART IV: HOLY PROMISES

What’s My Purpose?

Reflection On His Promises

Conclusion

Bibliography

INTRODUCTION

He has risen, and He is alive and just waiting on you! Did God give you a glimpse of your future? Has He put desires in your heart that create a passion and a strong desire to do more for God? Is your answer yes, but for some reason, life is not moving toward that destination? What has you stuck? Give yourself the gift of freedom. Be free from the devil’s lies, free from your own soul’s condemnation, and free to move on to what God needs you to do. It really comes down to reading and following the Word of God, the many examples He gave us in His Word, and our own experiences.

Friends, if you are reading this book, you have an incredible destiny waiting for you! I do not believe in chance. I believe God led you to this book to help you answer the question, Why can’t I move forward? Prayerfully, this book will help you figure out the reasons or the whys behind your seemingly delayed destiny. Why do I say seemingly? Because God’s timing is always perfect! God may have given you a vision, and you have diligently been working toward that vision. However, you seem to be getting nowhere fast.

One of the most important parts of your destiny is reaching other people for Jesus Christ. When God places something on your heart, He never lets up. However, He may tarry on giving you the tools you need or putting you in the place where your destiny will continue because there are issues that need to be resolved first! For one, people are procrastinators. Most of the time, people do not feel adequate enough to accomplish what God laid on their hearts.

After reading this book, I hope you realize no one is adequate! We need God to fulfill His side of the promise. We must get up, do what God leads us to do, stop our pity parties, realize we are not alone, and trust God to help us! If He laid a desire on your heart, He knows you will accomplish what must be done. Jeremiah wrote:

For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. (Jeremiah 29:11 NAS)

Other translations use an expected end (KJ2), meaning God expects you to complete it and knows you will. Paul confirms:

Now He who establishes us with you in Christ and anointed us is God, who also sealed us and gave us the Spirit in our hearts as a pledge. (2 Corinthians 1:21–22 NAS)

God pledges or guarantees what is to come. What He laid on your heart, He will do through you. You just have to let Him. Paul reiterates:

Such confidence we have through Christ toward God. Not that we are adequate in ourselves to consider anything as coming from ourselves, but our adequacy is from God, who also made us adequate as servants of a new covenant, not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life. (2 Corinthians 3:4–6 NAS)

God created you with a purpose. He promised to take care of you, and He also had an ulterior motive: He needs people to know who His Son was, is, and is yet to come. Since God sent His Son once and raised him from the dead to reign by His side in heaven until it’s time for Him to return, Jesus counts on you, me, and others—through the guidance of the Holy Spirit—to introduce Jesus to our friends, neighbors, and strangers. To capture their attention, we must live the way God wants us to live yet be transparent enough to let them know we are not perfect.

1 Thessalonians is a short, concise letter written by Paul that incorporates how we can live a holy life. This letter is filled with encouragement and love from Paul as he reminds the Thessalonians about holy living, which is used in this book to show you how to live and be a representative for Jesus.

Are you ready to find out what is holding you back? As you read this book, continually be in prayer for the Holy Spirit to reveal areas in your life that need attention. I will review the instructions given by Paul in 1 Thessalonians later in the book. First, however, I will show you that He did not teach me by simply reading and studying the many