Life After Sexual Abuse: A Practical Healing Toolkit to Reconnect Mind, Body & Soul

By Stacie Glass

SEXUAL ABUSE ISN'T AN EXPERIENCE OF THE PAST - IT'S TRAUMA OF THE PRESENT UNTIL IT IS HEALED

What if I told you it is possible to have a life after sexual abuse? That you are already worthy of a life that you deserve? Healing after any type of sexual trauma is a process of reclaiming the pieces of yourself, reclaiming parts of yourself th

• Language: English
• Publisher: Stacie Glass
• Release date: Sep 7, 2021
• ISBN: 9781914447204

Book preview

Life After Sexual Abuse

Life After Sexual Abuse

A Practical Healing Toolkit to Reconnect Mind, Body & Soul

Stacie Glass

That Guy’s House

Life After Sexual Abuse: A Practical Healing Toolkit to Reconnect Mind, Body & Soul

---

The information given in this book should not be treated as a substitute for professional medical advice. Always consult a medical practitioner.

---

Although the author and publisher have made every effort to ensure that the information in this book was correct at press time, the author and publisher do not assume and hereby disclaim any liability to any party for any loss, damage, or disruption caused by errors or omissions, whether such errors or omissions result from negligence, accident, or any other cause.

---

Copyright © Stacie Glass, 2021

---

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form, including photocopying and recording, without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer who may quote brief pages in review.

---

The book information is catalogued as follows;

Author Name(s): Stacie Glass

Title: Life After Sexual Abuse: A Practical Healing Toolkit to Reconnect Mind, Body & Soul

---

Description; First Edition

1st Edition, 2021

---

Book Design by Leah Kent

---

ISBN 978-1-914447-19-8 (paperback)

ISBN 978-1-914447-20-4 (ebook)

---

Published by That Guy’s House

www.ThatGuysHouse.com

To my inner child – thank you for all you endured, your strength and resilience.

I am here because of you.

Contents

Foreword

Introduction

Healing Diary

Diary Entries From My Time in Therapy

A letter to ‘him’

Reflections Now

Healing Toolkit: Journaling

Journaling is …

Journaling does not …

If you are new to journaling, here are some ways to get started:

Suggested questions to try:

Courage

1. I’m Not Broken

Early Years

Going to Court

Be patient

2. Healing the Mind

The Mind

Thoughts – Emotions – Behaviour

Honouring Your Grief

The Inner Critic

Healing Toolkit: Healing the Mind

Talking Therapy

Meditation and Mindfulness

Observing the Mind

Honoring Your Emotions

Journal Prompts: The Mind

3. Healing the Body

Sexual Healing: Reclaiming Your Power

Pregnancy, Birth and Parenting

Healing Toolkit: Moving Trauma Through the Body

Mindful Breathing

Journal Prompts: Healing the Body

4. Healing the Soul

Inner Child Reconnection

Intuition

Seven Steps to Accessing and Using Your Intuition

Healing Toolkit: Healing the Soul

Reconnecting to Your Inner Child Through Writing

Healing Practice – What Do You Value?

Healing Practice

Ritual

A Writing Ritual

Practice Gratitude

Daily Practice:

Journal Prompts

5. Self-Love

What Does Self-Love Mean to Me?

I Love You, I Am Listening

Healing Toolkit: Self-Love

What Does ‘Love’ Mean to You?

Ways to Love Yourself

Types of Self-Care

Self-Care Practice: Self-Soothing

Self-Care Practice: What I Most Need Today

Journal Prompts: Self-Love

6. Supporting Healing

Healing Toolkit: Supporting Survivors

Things Not to Say

Suggested Things to Say When You Don’t Know What to Say

Five Ways You Can Help

Journal Prompts for the Supporter

Useful Resources

Conclusion

My Healing Journey: The Unknown Quest

How to Move Forward

Resource Toolkit

Books

Connect with Me

My Website

Facebook

Instagram

Healing Toolkit: Things I Wish I Had Known 10 Years Ago

Healing Toolkit: ‘Them Days’: SOS Self-Care

Acknowledgments

About the Author

Foreword

Experiencing sexual abuse, rape and childhood sexual abuse is life changing. Many survivors struggle to acknowledge what has happened to them and how to cope with the aftermath of abuse. There is not a path to follow that suits everyone, there is no prescription that can wipe away the memories. As a survivor of incest myself, I could not make sense of what had happened to me and why. Now as an adult of mature years I have learnt that my journey is unique and my search for healing is never complete, but it is my journey and I am content with that.

---

In this book, you have found a friend. Stacie shares with you her story and she takes you gently by the hand through where she has been and where you may be just starting. There is no path you cannot travel, as she explains ways for you to deal with the memories that hold you back.

---

Each chapter opens up to speak to you as you are now, but also as the person who experienced a terrible trauma. Stacie reaches out to you gently, describing ways that have helped her when she was overwhelmed. She connects with the ‘inner child’ who was not loved or cared for. Perhaps remembering the child you were is too difficult; in this book you will find a way to connect and to love that little person. You may wish to read this book and then to put it down to come back to sometime later. Stacie gives you permission to do this. In fact, the key to your healing is to recognise that you have the power and the right to make your own way through.

---

In my life as a survivor, a midwife and a psychotherapist, I have been privileged to walk with many survivors on their path to healing. I have witnessed the desperate, raw emotions of someone standing strong in the memories of their past. This book will be an important resource for survivors and therapists. However, it is more than a toolkit for recovery. It is a book that is full of love and hope. It is a love letter to you for all that you lost and all that you were denied. Stacie has been on her own journey of healing, and she is holding out her arms for you now to follow your own path to healing.

---

Dr Kathryn Gutteridge

Introduction

What does life after sexual abuse mean to you? What would it look like?

What does healing feel like and how will you know you are healing?

When I started my healing journey a decade ago, there weren’t any books that described life after sexual abuse and what could help in the mammoth task to feel ‘normal’ again. I have come to realise that these past 10 years have been the start of the journey to call back the pieces of myself; I am not broken and I am worthy of a wholesome and fulfilling life.

I am enough exactly as I am, and so are you.

What does ‘healing’ mean? We will explore this throughout this book with ways you can begin healing or take you further on your path. This book is intended to support and encourage you to learn what feels right for you. I encourage self-inquiry to find out what ‘healing’ means to you. The general meaning of the word is ‘the process of becoming well again’. My interpretation of the word is bringing balance to mind, body and soul, and to know and understand ourselves with acceptance, forgiveness and compassion.

You are not what happened to you.

You are so much more and you deserve so much more.

It takes a lot of courage and sometimes several attempts to begin the healing journey. I know from my personal experience that avoiding the shadow and pain of our trauma only enables it to keep showing up, getting louder and louder until we listen to what it wants us to hear, see and feel. If we don’t listen, it shows up repeatedly, ever more present in ways that cannot be ignored.

Healing happens when we face the shadow and triggers of the trauma, moving through the pain, the pattern and the story, and choosing a new direction. Healing is a process, one we can’t predict nor control but is one that is unique to us and our individual needs. Healing happens when we choose to want more, choosing ourselves.

A Letter to You

Dear reader,

I see you. Thank you for choosing to read this labour of love and healing.

It is my hope that you find something within these pages to help you on your journey.

These pages begin by describing my journey from feeling lost, numb, broken, shameful and guilty because I was sexually abused and raped aged 11-13. At aged 26, I began my healing journey to break down those burdens I carried, to set myself free and to come home to myself. I didn’t realise then that I was on a self-discovery expedition but that led me to these pages now; with a passion to speak up loudly and clearly for others who don’t feel yet able to speak their truth. If you are reading this, you too may be on this tumultuous path or maybe you are supporting someone who has been sexually abused. It isn’t easy, so my advice is that you take this book at your own pace. One thing I learned early on in my therapy was that I didn’t hold myself with care or love, and the past 10 years have been about learning how to do that. And so, my wish for you is that if this sounds familiar, this is permission to hold yourself with care and love – because you so deserve it.

You are more courageous than you know.

Pause when you need to.

Stop when you need to.

Come along with me and I will help you feel hopeful and inspired to heal for you – you are worthy and you deserve the life you dream of. Healing after any trauma can feel like standing at the bottom of a mountain, staring up, unable to see the summit and feeling like getting there is impossible. I’m here to tell you that taking that first step up the mountain is what healing is. Wanting more for yourself is healing. We each have our own mountain and the landscape will be different for each of us. How one person takes the journey is unique in every sense because how they got to the bottom of the mountain was unique to them.

Is healing after sexual abuse hard? Yes.

Is it worth it? YES.

If 10 years ago I knew what I now know, I would have started this process sooner, but I believe we are where we are meant to be and we start when we feel ready. It’s okay if you don’t yet feel ready.

I want to be clear from the outset that this is my personal journey and it is not my intention to preach to anyone – only you know what is best for you individually, but it is my intention to offer hope that life after sexual abuse does exist and that the practical healing toolkit I outline in this book opens up doorways and avenues for your own healing, exploring what that looks and feels like for you. Be curious and give yourself permission to try different things. And give yourself permission to rest when you need to.

Thank you for picking this book up; the fact you have shows that you are ready to explore your healing and to put yourself first – for you.

I appreciate you.

With love,

Stacie

Recent worldwide statistics from The World Health Organisation (WHO, 2021) showed that one in three women have