Better Baby Sleep: A Handbook for Parents
By Jane Stockly and Ellen Surrey
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Better Baby Sleep - Jane Stockly
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Chapter 1: For Parents and Caregivers
Parents, this book is designed to help you understand your baby’s sleep. It provides important facts on infant sleep safety, as well as researched information that will help you develop the best way to manage your baby’s sleep and encourage even breast fed babies to learn to sleep through the night. It has been my experience in parent education that chronic, unresolved sleep issues can lead to severe sleep deprivation, which can be a formidable barrier to healthy parent/child bonding and the general enjoyment of parenthood.
There are no surefire solutions that guarantee a baby will get a good night’s sleep. I do not propose no-cry sleep solutions,
or recommend letting every child cry it out.
I do not offer any magical remedies. Your baby’s sleep is something you as a parent will have to learn how to handle, based on your knowledge, experience and your family.
Each baby is unique, and every family is different, with varying lifestyles and ideas about which strategies they feel comfortable implementing. You may have other children to care for, who have their own needs to be considered along with those of the baby. With the scientifically researched, practical information presented here, you should be in a position to better manage your family’s sleep needs and feel more confident in your ability to care for your baby.
Before she is able to sleep through the night, your baby needs to learn to self-soothe, to settle herself down to sleep without your help. Once she has learned to self-soothe, when she wakes up in the night, she will be able to fall back to a sound sleep on her own, without disturbing you.
When your baby sleeps a good portion of the night, this means you and your baby can both get enough rest and won’t be so tired. Lack of parental sleep impacts not only the parents’ sense of well-being, but also the way they interact with the baby; with other family members and particularly with any other children the parents may have. Excessive maternal tiredness can contribute to postnatal depression. When you are less tired, you may find you are able to enjoy your baby more and find bonding easier. A well-rested baby is usually in better spirits than one who is sleep-deprived, and the same holds true for a well-rested parent.
I am a parent of two daughters, both now in college. I know how tiring and how all-consuming it is to care for a baby 24 hours a day, seven days a week. I currently work as a parent education instructor at Glendale Community College in California; a program where parents from a variety of cultures and backgrounds bring their children, newborn to five years of age, to a child-friendly classroom environment, where they learn about child development and discuss various parenting issues.
Parents in my classes were the inspiration for this book. I have found that whatever their background, parents are often confused by all the information that is available on infant sleep, some of which is contradictory, culturally biased, and sometimes even judgmental. While some parents may not have any worries about getting enough sleep at night in this stage in their parenting, others are desperate for straightforward advice that will help them develop healthy sleep patterns in their babies and give them a chance to sleep undisturbed for a few hours at night. I know this, because every semester we welcome a new batch of sleep- deprived parents, many frazzled after breast-feeding their babies around the clock.
At our parent education program, I have often been asked to teach a special session on infant sleep for other teachers. One day while I introduced my lesson for encouraging sleep at night, I noticed one exhausted mother sitting back in her chair with her arms crossed, shaking her head in disagreement. She said she believed mothers who breast-fed could not possibly expect their babies to sleep well. After I replied that I exclusively breast-fed both of my babies, and that starting about three months of age they usually slept uninterrupted from 10 p.m. until 6 a.m., I had her attention for the entire sleep lesson.
A few months later I taught that class again, and the same mother was there, looking well-rested and cheerful, I remember you, you’re the Sleep Lady,
she said as soon as she saw me. You were a big help. I’m having a great time with my baby. I’m still breast-feeding and she sleeps through the night.
Her experience sums up the purpose of this book. I want all parents to have a great time with their babies and to form wonderful attachments with them, which are at the core of healthy child development. I think this is more likely if everyone gets the sleep they need.
I have worked with families and young children in varying capacities for close to 30 years. I hold a Nursery Nursing Diploma, from the United Kingdom; an Associate of Arts Degree in Social Science, from Glendale Community College; and a Bachelors Degree in Human Development,