The Last Self Help Book: An Ultimate Guide to Who You Really Are

By Anthony North

From Humour to Fear, Shame to Perfection, Love to Hate & more. In asking what is 'you' Anthony North combines psychology and sociology in his quest to find out what it really means to be an individual ... or not.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Anthony North
• Release date: Nov 4, 2020
• ISBN: 9781005667719

Anthony North

Thinker & Storyteller****7,453 Words to Save the UK and I,Writer are now FREE. Scroll down to find them.*****1955 (Yorkshire, England) – I am born (Damn! Already been done). ‘Twas the best of times ... (Oh well).I was actually born in the year of Einstein's death, close to Scrooge's Counting House. It doesn't mean anything but it sounds good. As for my education, I left school at 15 and have had no formal education since. Hence, I'm self-taught.****From a family of newsagents, at 18 I did a Dick Whittington and went off to London, only to return to pretend to be Charlie and work in a chocolate factory.When I was ten I was asked what I wanted to be. I said soldier, writer and Dad. I never thought of it for years – having too much fun, such as a time as lead guitarist in a local rock band – but I served nine years in the RAF, got married and had seven kids. I realized my words had been precognitive when, at age 27, I came down with M.E. – a condition I’ve suffered ever since – and turned my attention to writing.Indeed, as I realized that no expert could tell me what was wrong with me, I began my quest to find out why. Little did I realize it would last decades and take me through the entire history of knowledge, leaving me with the certainty that our knowledge systems are inadequate.****My non-fiction is based on P-ology, a thought process I devised to work with patterns of knowledge, and designed to be a bedfellow to specialization. A form of Rational Holism, it seeks out areas the specialist may have missed. I work from encyclopaedias and introductory volumes in order to gain a grasp of many subjects and am not an expert in anything, but those patterns keep forming. Hence, I do not deal in truth, but ideas, and cover everything from politics to the paranormal.When reading my work I ask only: do I make sense? Of course, an expert would say: a little knowledge is a dangerous thing. I agree. And an expert has so little knowledge of everything.I also write novels and Flash Fiction in all genres.

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The Last Self Help Book:

An Ultimate Guide to Who You Really Are

By Anthony North

Copyright: Anthony North 2020

Cover image copyright: Yvonne North, 2020

Smashwords Edition

No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission

Other books by Anthony North

In 2019 I began a 3 year publishing program that will result in 14 volumes of my fiction, inc 7 novels in most genres, & 21 works of non-fiction covering cults, politics, conspiracies, religion, disasters, science, philosophy, warfare, crime, psychology, new age, green issues & all areas of the unexplained, inc ufology, lost worlds and the paranormal. Hopefully appearing at the rate of one a month, check out the latest launch at my bookstore at http://anthonynorth.com or buy direct from Smashwords for all devices at: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/anthonynorth

In addition to the above, you may like my ‘I’ Series – 8 volumes of flash fiction (horror, sci fi, romance, adventure, crime), 4 volumes of poetry & 5 volumes of short essays from politics to the unexplained. Available from same links as above. Also check out my bookstore for news of my books out in paperback.

CONTENTS

Introduction

PART ONE - ASPECTS OF US

Faith

Humour

Fear

Betrayal

Friendship

Perfection

Sin

Beauty

Suffering

Benevolence

Shame

Custom

PART TWO - HOMO ERATICUS

One - Am I Mad?

Two - Labels, Labels, Labels

Three - A Short History of Psychiatry

Four - Psycho-Ologies

Five - The Devil In the Gene

Six - A Short History of Sociology

Seven - Slouching Towards Freud

Eight - Essentially Us

Nine - Little Arrows, or Love

Ten - The Emotive Part, or Hate, Joy & Sorrow

Eleven - Echoes of Jung, or Archetypes

Conclusion

Bibliography

About the Author

Connect With Anthony

Introduction

A question:

If you believe in self-help, why do you need a book to help you?

You see, I have a problem with a publishing trend that is so obviously a contradiction. Hence, if you read this, let’s hope it’s your last.

But even more important, I have a problem with our present understanding of the mind, of life and of everything. I think we’ve got it all wrong. Take the ‘self’. What is it? Is it a product of your individuality, or is your individuality a product of things outside the individual you? Indeed, what is ‘you’?

This book is about those questions. It is split into two parts. First of all we have a number of essays which deal with various aspects of our life, from humour to fear. Then, by delving into psychology and sociology, I go in search of what ‘you’ are, including the sanity – or insanity – of your mind.

Enjoy the journey.

Then throw away your self-help books.

Except this one, of course.

Part One - ASPECTS OF US

Faith

We say we can have faith in many things. We can have faith in ourselves; we can have faith in others. But is this really the case? Consider having faith in others. What does this mean? Does it mean you would trust them with your life? If so, why? Is it a simple knowing, or is your decision based on what you know of them?

We rarely put faith in a total stranger, unless we know him to be a policeman, fireman or doctor, for instance. As such we expect a certain standard of competence, so we are safe in their hands. Similarly, when we put faith in a friend, we usually do so because we have known them for a long time and are aware of their loyalties and capabilities. But this is not faith.

This is calculated risk.

Faith is something else entirely. Faith is when we look into the darkness of the future and instinctively know we can safely travel with a certain person or thing. Faith is blind, not decided by calculating risk or any other form of rationality. Faith just happens, without logic, without true mentation of any kind.

It is therefore even wrong to talk about faith in oneself.

When you carry out an action which you think requires faith in yourself, what you are actually doing is having confidence in your known ability. You know yourself better than you know others, and this is instinctively known, forever offering judgements about yourself. Hence, it is rarely a shot in the dark.

True use of faith moves closer to reality when we talk of love. Here, we can meet a stranger and birth this irrational idea that we could spend the rest of our life with them. Sometimes this, can indeed, be blind - a true act of faith. But even here we can usually find elements that show it not to be faith. If you have had other lovers, your decision can be based on experience of your new love against previous loves. This is rational analysis; and can even be used to decide your new love's attitudes compared to what you have known with others.

True faith does, of course, exist. And again it almost always involves love. But it is love of God, or other supernatural deity. This is faith in its perfect sense, for the existence of the deity cannot be proved, and any evidence of His actions in the world are rationally spurious. Hence, the philosopher Soren Kierkegaard was right to classify a love for a deity as truly a 'leap of faith'.

Such faith can birth for a variety of reasons. Many Christians, for instance, have faith through custom. They were brought up in the Church in a family that has always been Christian. Hence, it is natural that faith grows within your mind.

With others, faith can be a temporary thing. Something can happen in life that produces adversity. Psychologically, you are a mess, and a deep longing exists in you for something more. This is the point at which a person is most open to a leap of faith. Often, they can end up joining cults or other alternative religions. But in reality, whilst this produces faith, it can be shallow, in that when your problems are eased, your faith goes.

Alternatively, some who suffer adversity, or begin searching for something more, take the leap of faith and retain it throughout a lifetime. However, the above psychological need can be equally prevalent; or alternatively, faith can be empowering, giving the person confidence in an institution, and birthing the natural leader. This is usually the response that leads to the priest, his faith turning him from an ordinary man to a person with charisma or purpose.

Faith often produces such a transition. Taking a leap of faith requires a total submission and immersion in the way of life a particular religion offers. Unlike career, or politics, or other paths in life, this totality produces a feeling of meaning and direction far more fundamental. It consumes, and the person becomes, not so much an individual, but a microcosm of the totality of the particular religion. In Christianity, for instance, everything that Christ suffered can be echoed in your own suffering; the love Christ had for others is echoed in your own love for others. And at Eucharist you share in his very body and blood; an intimacy often thought to be far more ecstatic than even earthly sex.

Nothing is more empowering than true meaning and direction. Your place in the world is assured; you know who you are; you know what is expected of you. And this can be moralizing as well as empowering. And in this sense, it can bring out the best in people, leading to charitable work, high moral standards and a deep sense of community. But such faith can also have a flip side.

One obvious area where such faith can have an effect is in personal relationships. If a spouse shares your faith, love for another person can exist, for there is an acceptance that love for another is a lesser thing, but nurtured, if nonetheless subservient to God. However, when a partner does not share such faith, an overpowering love of God can have severe effects on your relationship. In this respect, unless faith can be compartmentalized, your spiritual happiness is not echoed in your personal happiness. For a person without faith can know nothing higher than personal love, with a partner's deeper love of God being a form of betrayal.

Alternatively, faith can lead to certainty of action and behaviour against other systems and beliefs. With an absolute certainty of the truth of your faith and religion, others can seem heretic. Intolerance, bigotry and violence can ensue, your righteousness leading to persecution of others and, in the extreme, suicide bombing.

This is counter to the views of your faith, regardless what it is. Some faiths have attempted to still such zealousness with the idea of hating the sin, not the sinner. But perhaps all faiths should shout from the rooftops the requirement of empathy and fraternity. For all the major faiths share a simple social code - love they neighbour as thyself. Faith inspired violence and bigotry is always wrong, for the essence of faith is toleration. But sadly, far too many minorities within faith ignore their scripture. I suppose a book, like the Bible, is like a weapon. It can be used for good or bad.

Faith is not necessarily a single concept. We can speak of 'being spiritual' or 'having religion', the two phrases thought of as meaning the same thing. Yet this is not so. Spirituality tends to be a personal thing; an inner knowing and sense of being subservient to a higher power. The feelings of joy it engenders is also personal; an intimacy with your deity.

Alternatively, a religion is an organization within society. It is a definite media, a community, a system of rules, a process of ritual, a historic understanding of the place of mankind within his society. There is nothing personal in this social concept, other than the way it allows inner spirituality a form of validity within a group.

Spirituality and religion are here seen as two separate but symbiotic elements of faith. Usually the two go together - hence the idea that they are one and the same. But they are different; even though they work best together.

When you tend to have one without the other, problems can ensue. For instance, religions often enter the socio-political sphere. Typical was European Christendom during the Middle Ages. Religion was imposed on others as a form of social control, and the result was totalitarianism. Alternatively, New Age offers a personal spirituality without religion in an organized sense. New Age teaches people to love themselves - although the idea is then to take that love out to others.

This cannot properly occur without an organized religion. Hence, most New Agers stop at the selfish requirement to love themselves, the whole idea of spirituality thus being turned into self-centredness which does nothing for the wider society.

Of course, all of this will be dismissed as mumbo jumbo by the atheist. To him there is