Singing Through the Storm: …Because I Still Have God, Family, and Professional Growth

By Kelli Bressman Horn

You Can Still Enjoy A Great Life Through Life Challenges

What counts in life is not what happens to us, but how we respond to it. Author Kelli Horn became acquainted with adversity after the loss of her father, sister, and two boyfriends. She has embraced them as learning opportunities, as she lives purposefully for God, family, professional growth, and in health/fitness. Furthermore, she has obtained a degree in health information technology and the (RHIT) Registered Health Information Technologist, (CCS) Certified Coding Specialist, and the AHIMA-approved ICD-10-CM/PCS Trainer national credentials during a major life storm.

Sing Through The Storm

Find hope for today and every day

Make your life count and grow through any life challenge

Enjoy God, Family, and Professional Growth

Discover the best kept spiritual secret

Strengthen family relationships

Become a lifelong learner

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Jul 20, 2015
• ISBN: 9781490873794

Kelli Bressman Horn

Kelli Horn is the Coding Education Manager at Ardent Health Services and an Adjunct Coding Instructor at Tulsa Community College. She has been a speaker at the American Health Information Management Association (AHIMA) Clinical Coding meeting in Louisiana and their national convention in California. In addition, she has spoken about leadership at the Oklahoma Health Information Management Association (OKHIMA), where she currently serves as the Communications Coordinator. She has instructed CCS Exam Review workshops for Oklahoma, Arkansas, and New York, and Coding Clinic Update and ICD-10-CM/PCS workshops for Oklahoma. She has also published articles regarding coding and leadership for the Journal of AHIMA and AHIMA Code Write, and has been interviewed for AHIMA’s Advantage publication. Finally, she has been a guest speaker and/or piano performer at women’s groups, civic organizations, community colleges, and grief groups, and a Miss Oklahoma preliminary pageant system.

Book preview

SINGING THROUGH THE

STORM

…Because I Still Have God, Family, and Professional Growth

Kelli Bressman Horn

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Copyright © 2015 Kelli Bressman Horn.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by Biblica, Inc. All rights reserved worldwide. Used by permission. NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION® and NIV® are registered trademarks of Biblica, Inc. Use of either trademark for the offering of goods or services requires the prior written consent of Biblica US, Inc.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

ISBN: 978-1-4908-7380-0 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-7381-7 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-7379-4 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2015904582

WestBow Press rev. date: 07/16/2015

Contents

Part One: Growing Up

Chapter 1 ~ Growing Up With Life Challenges

Chapter 2 ~ The Day My Life Changed And No One Told Me

Chapter 3 ~ A Childhood Of Love

Chapter 4 ~ When Melody Met Ron

Chapter 5 ~ When The Recovery Room Is Your Final Stop

Chapter 6 ~ I Have To Win

Chapter 7 ~ The Road To Haikey

Chapter 8 ~ You Can’t Even Get Out Of Bed

Chapter 9 ~ There She Is…Miss Broken Arrow?

Chapter 10 ~ Life As An Adult

Part Two: Rob and Melody’s Story

Chapter 11 ~ Rob, Can You Hear Me?

Chapter 12 ~ Rob’s Car Accident

Chapter 13 ~ Rob’s One Year Hospital Stay

Chapter 14 ~ The Day Rob Walked Again

Chapter 15 ~ Rob’s Friend Shares

Chapter 16 ~ God’s Blessings of Memories

Chapter 17 ~ Morning Reflections

Chapter 18 ~ Life With Melody

Chapter 19 ~ Visiting The Mouse

Chapter 20 ~ Melody’s Final Thanksgiving

Chapter 21 ~ A Child Loaned

Chapter 22 ~ Forsaken

Part Three: Life Continuing Education

Chapter 23 ~ Surprise! 17 Years Later

Chapter 24 ~ End of Life Matters

Chapter 25 ~ A Diagnosis Changes Everything

Part Four: Singing Through The Storm

Chapter 26 ~ Singing Through The Storm

Chapter 27 ~ Growing Up With Music

Chapter 28 ~ Music In My Life Challenge Journey

Chapter 29 ~ A New Song

Chapter 30 ~ Bobby’s Song

Chapter 31 ~ Mom’s Song

Chapter 32 ~ Myka’s Song

Part Five: My Life Priorities

Chapter 33 ~ I Still Have God

Chapter 34 ~ Growing Spiritually

Chapter 35 ~ I Still Have Family

Chapter 36 ~ Growing In Health and Fitness

Chapter 37 ~ I Still Have Professional Growth

Chapter 38 ~ Growing Professionally

Chapter 39 ~ Age Has No Limit To Professional Growth

Part Six Five: Stages of Growing Through Life Challenges

Chapter 40 ~ I Learned Everything About Life Challenges From An OU Football Game

Chapter 41 ~ Life Challenges Are A Hidden Treasure

Chapter 42 ~ The Five Stages of Growing Through Life Challenges

Chapter 43 ~ How I Applied the 5 Stages of Growing Through Life Challenges

Chapter 44 ~ Stage #1 – Grieve the way you want.

Chapter 45 ~ Stage #2 – Ask God Why?

Chapter 46 ~ Stage #3 – Keep Living

Chapter 47 ~ Stage #4 – Reach Out To Others

Chapter 48 ~ Stage #5 – Sing It Loud and Proud

Chapter 49 ~ Hope For The Holidays

Chapter 50 ~ When I Get To Heaven

Part Seven: Next Steps For Your Life Journey

Chapter 51 ~ Next Steps

Chapter 52 ~ Singing Through The Storm Seminar

Chapter 53 ~ Driven To Achieve Seminar

Chapter 54 ~ It’s The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

Chapter 55 ~ Journey To The Crown

Chapter 56 ~ Girls Night Out

Chapter 57 ~ Grief Bites

Chapter 58 ~ Getting Your Breath Back After Life Knocks It Out of You

Chapter 59 ~ CCS Examination Review

Chapter 60 ~ You Version Reading Plan

Chapter 61 ~ Author’s Website

Chapter 62 ~ Available Seminar and Workshop Topics

Dedication

I would like to dedicate this book to God and my family.

I especially want to thank my parents, Ron and Melody, as they have listened and contributed to countless hours of conversations regarding the work and principles found in this book. In addition, I would like to thank my mom for living out the message. She made keeping on keeping on look easy and normal.

I would also like to thank my sister, Kim, and brother, Bobby, for their involvement in my life challenge journey as well. They have seen me live life through the good times and bad times, and they still continue to love and encourage me.

Finally, I would like to thank God for the new song He has given me, and for His grace to keep singing through the storm.

Step by step…we can do this.

Kelli Bressman Horn

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Foreword

This book will give you a guide for the steps to take when you are going through deep trials. Kelli has done a remarkable work in showing how she has gone through major hardships and what she has gleaned from the journey.

We all face setbacks in this life. They come from loss and unrealized expectations as well as our own built-in shortcomings and mistakes. We can face these situations with only two resolves: stop and camp out in sadness that overwhelms or take the steps to go through it and come out the other side, not simply changed, but transformed.

Thank you Kelli for putting your life to paper so that it can transform lives!

Bobby Bressman

Brother

Endorsements

Several years ago I received a card from Kelli Horn. When I opened it, brilliant confetti flew everywhere. Her brother and my coworker, Bobby, walked by and I mentioned that the card and the confetti were from Kelli. He said, Yes, that’s my sister! Apparently he was accustomed to her colorful and expressive gestures.

I smile every time I think about that card. So many shiny pieces scattered everywhere. They were like a fresh wind blowing through my highly organized, tightly focused day.

Kelli has every right, by this world’s value system, to squelch any hint of breeze or to live as destructively as an Oklahoma tornado. She has known more personal loss than anyone should have to. However, she and her family are role models for how to keep on keeping on when life hits you with its worst possible combination of punches. She teaches us to sing the laments, the love, and the hope of real life lived in the light of ultimate reality.

Resilience is not learned by reading books. Neither are muscles strengthened by looking at photos of well-conditioned athletes. However, you need to read this book to prepare you for building the muscles of perseverance in the tough times that lie ahead. Fortify yourself to lift up others when they receive wounds from the painful incidents of life.

Learn what to say, what not to say, and how to sing in times of grief and recovery. Know what to believe and what to reject in times of sorrow. Discover that you can laugh and celebrate life again even in the darkest nights of your souls. When this becomes your reality, you too will blow brilliant confetti of loving smiles into the lives of others.

David Bowman, DMin

Executive Director

Tarrant Baptist Association

Kelli Bressman Horn’s life is a wonderful example of one who knows that the clouds eventually ‘go away’ and that the sun, always there, ‘comes shining through’. In Singing Through The Storm, she writes of personal losses she survived because the One who made us also holds us close to His heart. She offers excellent suggestions to help us ‘Sing" even when dealing with life’s difficulties.

Clarence G. Oliver, Jr., Ed.D.

Author, Historian, Educator, Soldier,

Emeritus Professor and Former University Dean,

Lifetime Achievement Award Recipient, Broken

Arrow Chamber of Commerce

Every time I read any portion of Kelli’s book, I end up in tears. Not always sad tears, some, but mostly really, really proud tears! I am so honored to be a part of her professional journey through the past many years. Watching her absorb information and knowledge like the world’s biggest sponge was, and still is, quite impressive and continues to keep me in awe!

There was never a doubt in my mind if I was making the right decision by allowing her the opportunity to be promoted into a coding position from a clerical position many moons ago. Sure there would be extensive training and education required to get through the professional growing pains and learning curve, but I knew I had the right woman for that undertaking.

She is one of the most ambitious, driven, and dedicated people I know. The skill set and character traits she exhibits in every task, every day, leaves no doubt in anyone’s mind that she will face each goal head on with at least 110% effort.

A true testimony to this fact is all the trials and tribulations that she has faced and dealt with in her young life. Honestly, most people would have given up and lost their self in their grief. Through her faith and strength, she continues to persevere and keep on keeping on.

Through her perseverance and conscious eye on her targets, she has checked many goals off her professional to-do list and, if I know her like I think I do, then her list of professional and spiritual goals will never end. She will continue to absorb information and always strive to expand her knowledge base and then share that information with others.

Sharing her life story and experiences in this book will reach, support, motivate, and inspire so many people. There are so many examples that can demonstrate to people dealing with grief, professional, career, or spiritual struggles and challenges how it is possible to persevere through the tough times, or as she says so perfectly sing through the storm!

Christy Matheson, RHIA, CCS

Director of Shared Coding Services

Ardent Health Services

Kelli Horn is a love gift from God in the lives of many, including myself. Her ability to sing through the storm, (loud and proud, I might add) is reflected by the lyrics she has chosen to incorporate in her life’s song. I love the symbolism of the book’s title as the melodies of music touch every emotion and the lyrics speak to us and for us. They bring us laughter and joy, soothe us in times of despair, or if need be, help us to cry, and bring us closer together and to God.

On a daily basis, Kelli embodies the life challenge lessons and knowledge she has gained and shares, for the benefit of others, through this book. In the verses of her song, she gives us guidance steps for grief recovery; in the chorus, the keys to persevere through the storms; and in the bridge, the transition, the contrast, and the right to have a personal component to our grief.

Kelli is a highly motivated individual with an infectious positive attitude and a caring heart. She is a respected Health Information Management professional. As an educator, she helps others achieve their goals for professional growth. Additionally, she and her sister provide activities and support for those who have recently experienced grief through the loss of a loved one. Please let Kelli’s experience help you or someone you know with the journey through grief.

Sandy Smith, RHIA, CCS

Director of Health Information Technology Program

Tulsa Community College

You will find much wisdom and many jewels while reading Singing Through The Storm. Kelli has a unique life story, in which she chose to press forward and learn so much through tragedy. Her readers will receive practical advice and will be able to apply her suggestions immediately, while greatly improving their own personal grief experience.

Kim Niles

Author of Getting Your Breath Back After Life Knocks It Out of You and

You Version Grief Bites devotionals

Preface

Over the last twenty years, I have been asked many questions about the loss of my sister, Melody, and my first boyfriend, Rob. Because both deaths happened within thirty days, friends, coworkers, people at church, and friends at college were very curious about both of their lives and deaths. While I did not mind providing details, I quickly learned that I was more interested in sharing the true realities of losing a loved one and how life challenges made me better, not bitter.

Some of the common questions I have been asked include:

• What happened to Rob?

• How did he become paralyzed?

• Did you two start dating before or after his accident?

• What happened in his second accident?

• How was he able to drive?

• What happened to the others involved in the car accident?

• Why was he in the hospital for a year?

• Did you think he was going to make it?

• How did your sister die?

• How were you able to get through both deaths?

• How did your Mom and Dad get through losing their daughter?

• Are you mad at God?

• How could a loving God allow that to happen?

I have seen other people become stuck in their life challenges and have observed the long-lasting negative impact on their lives. It influenced their personal attitude toward God, life, and others, and prevented them from embracing the present and setting goals for growth in the future. Because of this, I determined that I would overcome life challenges. I want to learn from the past, embrace the present, and anticipate the future. Life is short and I only have one opportunity to experience it.

I have written this book to answer some of these questions, and most importantly, to provide hope, validation, and encouragement for others who find themselves walking a similar road. Experiencing life challenges can be a very lonely and misunderstood experience, but it can eventually be very rewarding. I would like to join with you in your life challenge journey and share some comfort and hope along the way.

In addition, my life challenge journey would not be complete without mentioning professional growth. Everyone spends at least forty hours per week in the workplace, home, or another setting. I happen to spend mine in the workplace. As a result, I have had to learn how to balance embracing my life challenges while trying to remain highly engaged and grow professionally while performing my job duties. Therefore, I have included my signature Four Steps To Growing Professionally.

Acknowledgements

I would like to acknowledge my sister, Kim Niles, and my mom, Melody Horn, for their dedication to their families. Watching my mom in her role as mom, nana, and great-nana, and Kim in her role as mom and aunt, has been very inspiring. Because of their examples, I am very committed to our family.

Furthermore, my brother, Bobby, played an instrumental role in my spiritual growth. He encouraged me to return to my spiritual roots during my teenage years. As a result, we created special memories of serving together while he was the youth intern at First Baptist Church Broken Arrow. I am also thankful that God has allowed him to serve in many different ministerial roles over the last twenty-five years as a senior pastor and youth pastor.

I would like to thank my dad, Ron Horn, for leading us in family devotions and for his commitment to reading through the Bible. That has stuck with me through life and now I have my own personal devotions and have read through the Bible two times. Having a Christian dad has made all the difference in my life.

Christy Matheson, my supervisor for over ten years, provided me the opportunity to become a coder and has supported me in my ongoing professional endeavors. I have reported directly to her at several healthcare facilities, including Broken Arrow Medical Center, Saint Francis Hospital South, Saint Francis Hospital Tulsa, and Ardent Health Services.

I would like to acknowledge my former Tulsa Community College Health Information Technology instructors, Sandy Smith, Jennifer Dafforn, Patti Hawkins, Susan Jantz, and Ruby Marshall. Without them, I would not have been able to complete my health information technology degree and achieve my national coding certifications.

In addition, I would also like to thank my family for their assistance in the book submission process. My nephew, Kaleb, provided the photography for the front and back cover; my niece, Brittany, edited the manuscript; my niece, Adrienne, helped secure content permission; my niece, Jessie, encouraged me to achieve my goals, my Dad scanned the photographs; and my mom, Melody, helped with photograph selection and content inclusion.

Finally, I would like to thank those who submitted material to be included in this book.

Introduction

Everyone experiences challenges in life that can either make or break us. How we respond is significantly more important than what we experience. As we learn how to effectively embrace and overcome these challenges, we are able to grow personally, spiritually, and professionally.

In the following pages, readers will learn about my personal story of keeping on keeping on through adversity. Those who desire to overcome life challenges will receive instruction and practical steps of life application. Furthermore, the innovative Five Stages of Growing Through Life Challenges will be introduced.

Learning about my career path, and certification journey, and how I was able to achieve educational and professional goals through adversity will be beneficial for those who desire professional growth. Therefore, the Four Steps To Growing Professionally will be explored.

Finally, I provide possible next steps that can be applied to overcoming life challenges and growing professionally. I encourage all readers to write down helpful information and ideas in the Notes section, which is located at the back of the book.

Step by step, we can do this!

PART ONE

Growing Up

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CHAPTER 1

Growing Up With Life Challenges

When I was three years old, my life changed forever and I did not even realize it. My first