Can you have your rose with the thorns?

By Gareth Guyler

The name of this book is intended, because reading it will help you to meet your rose but also and very importantly tell you something of the thorns you could experience. Every beautiful rose has thorns and if shown how you can pick and keep the rose without too much pain.
This book has been written for men by a man, a man that has been through the tedious long exercise of finding, talking to and romancing girls from Eastern Europe. This book is not only intended to show you how to find and romance a girl remotely in a different country. It is also intended to show you a lot of what to expect and what you will go through.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Gareth Guyler
• Release date: Jun 22, 2012
• ISBN: 9781476473178

Book preview

Can you have your rose with the thorns?

Author

Gareth John Guyler

Can you have your rose with the thorns?

Copyright 2012 Gareth Guyler

Published by Gareth John Guyler at Smashwords

On purchasing this ebook you agree that it is for your use and reading only. This ebook may not be reproduced, in any form what so ever. This ebook may not be resold, borrowed, or given away to any other person or persons. If you have obtained this book by any means other than a legitimate purchase, please be honorable and purchase a licensed copy.

Front cover art work by

Natasha Guyler

Art work may include amended content from the public domain

Chapter 1: Introduction

The name of this book is intended, because reading it will help you to meet your rose but also and very importantly tell you something of the thorns you could experience. Every beautiful rose has thorns and if shown how you can pick and keep the rose without too much pain.

This book has been written for men by a man, a man that has been through the tedious long exercise of finding, talking to and romancing girls from Eastern Europe. This book is not only intended to show you how to find and romance a girl remotely in a different country. It is also intended to show you a lot of what to expect and what you will go through. You can find quite a bit written on the subject and a lot of it makes for a wonderful fairy tale. My answer to that is if you want a fairy tale go buy one read it and continue dreaming, because this is the real world and you are dealing with real people and not the pages of some one else’s fantasies.

This been said I want to say that if you have made up your mind to look for a woman abroad, the journey that you are about to embark on is possible very possible and could be one of the most exciting times of your life. To prove this to you I have include a version of my story at the end of this book. I have done it on purpose as before you read my eventual success story I want you to make up your own mind as to what you will have to go through to reach success.

Before even reading further there is one thing you must know, and that is to go through with this, and have success at the end will require your time, you will have to work at it, and your are going to have to spend money, for some of you more money that you expected.

As I have already said this book is written by a man giving you a man’s perspective on the adventure you are about to undertake. As you will see later on in the book men and women relate to things in different ways and that is why I hope you as a man can relate to what is written on these pages.

As my experience is with Eastern European women this book is written with them in mind, but there are sections not specific to countries and could apply to any woman on the planet.

There is not much written about what these women look like because I don’t think that you would be reading a book on the subject if you did not already know, looks are one thing cultural differences are another, read on.

With all that have been said read on and you could be starting one of the most exciting times of your life.

The Start

Most of you have been to some of the sites some are real and some are not, but you see all these beautiful, gorgeous girls and think to yourself it must be easy, well, well it can be and it can’t be. One business saying I like about one of the countries in the region is it is not easy to do business with them but you can be sure it’s fun and exciting the same I could say for attracting, romancing one of these girls.

Chapter 2: Let’s take a look at who you want

So now time to use your brain a bit. Think to yourself what type of woman you would want. What you would want the woman for. Although this might seem like a strange question, but asking 10 men will get you at least 5 different answers to what they really want.

These questions are asked as certain criteria can affect your search for that perfect woman you dream about.

Do you want to marry her?

Do you just want a companion?

What about some one just to cook and clean?

Must she be tall or short?

Must she be very attractive or average?

What colour of hair do you prefer?

What eye colour drives you mad?

Must she like / love children?

Must she be ambitious?

Must she be clever / educated?

Must she be extravagant or plain?

Would you want an extravert / introvert?

Would you want her eventually work or not?

What age gap should she fit into?

Write down a list and keep it handy, a list that you could write down the names of the girls and then mark off who meets what criteria.

If she displays some characteristic that you like / don’t like write it on you list.

You have intuition (a gut feeling) put it down on paper not just once but all the way through your adventure, do it with every woman you talk to or meet.

The list could go on and on and I am sure that you have some of your own questions or criteria that you would want the woman of your dreams to meet. In your search that could end you with the person you could share the rest of your life with your list of criteria can never be too long, just always keep it reasonable. Why I suggest a list is that we all have a certain criteria for that someone in our lives all be it a mental note, but all too often when we meet someone and emotions kicks in to play the mental list goes out of the window and our emotions take control.

Then as time goes by maybe even a few years our emotion change, love changes and we see things that we thought were not there, well they were there all along you just did not see them because of your emotion and maybe you did see it but put it by the way side because of your emotions and feelings.

Now if you had a list you could revaluate it from time to time and asses it to determine if she is the person for you because even though your emotions might have played with you pen and paper do not lie.

By the way a list should not just be done for people looking for some one in another country, it should be done by all people both male and female it would give you some insight into the person you are perusing, marring or wanting.

In gaining insight into the person you want, firstly it can help you attract them but also prepare you for your future together, so when actions, reactions, wants, desires and so on come out you should be ready for it and also able to react to them in a positive manner.

Gaining insight into a person could not only enhance your relationship but prolong it and hopefully make it forever.

I am not saying that emotion can not override the list, of course they can, but then you made an empowered decision to override what you knew about that person and then it comes down to responsibility, your responsibility. In stead of giving up on a relationship you have been empowered, so you have the knowledge of the problem and all problems have a solution and it is just so, so much easier when you know. It will also take away resentment because how can you resent what you knew all along and willingly got into.

There is a wonderful notation, but can only work if you get the opportunity and that is if you want to know her meet her parents, take a good look at them especially her mom and see what she will eventually be.

Now let’s be practical the list is not something you can fill in and make you sure in a person within a day or a week, but let’s leave it there for now more is explained in the chapter Getting to know her.

Now be honest with yourself and ask yourself the question do I want an animal in my life. I sincerely hope the answer to that question is no, so then who do I want in my life? A human being? - Yes a human being.

Now that we have established that ask yourself are these women human beings? - And the answer of course is yes. So, does not every human being deserve the right to be treated as a human being, this is the most basic right of people on the face of this planet.

And of course the best way of evaluating this statement is to practice treat others as you would like them to treat you.

Now let’s delve a little deeper. Would you want a lady in your life? And believe me there is a difference between a lady and a woman just as there is a difference between a gentleman and a man.

A lady is a woman that would not put unrealistic demands on her partner, or future partner. That in itself can be a fine line to walk, because yes some ladies would want and maybe demand things of you that at some time would seem to you completely unrealistic, but those things normally come down to why you would want her in the first place and that is attention, thinking of her, showing her she is special and of course every now and again flowers and some gifts won’t hurt. These, let’s call them demands, are normal because if you have chosen someone or are pursuing a woman to be the special one you have to make her feel just that, that she is so very special to you.

Unrealistic demands come down to, even thought you have discussed it with her, your feeling and or situation, it does not matter to her and she is only concerned with what she can get out of you and the relationship. Unfortunately just as there are bad men in this world so there are women that display these characteristics so beware and look for early signs.

A lady delights in complementing her man, in coming along side him and trying no matter how hard it may be for her to understand him and his circumstances.

Let me just interject here and say that having a lady does in no way what so ever mean that the sex has to be scarce or boring. Being a lady is more to do with how she treats you and how she acts around others while taking you into account.

Being a lady does not mean that she has to be drab and boring either ask me I am married to a very sexy lady who turns all the heads and it is just so much better because she is a lady.

Ladies have more fun because after the evening is over she does not have to apologise for her actions to you or any one else, she also attracts more attention because of who she is.

One thing a true lady is never boring because others like her company even so her affection and attention would be on you.

There are other important things to take into account when looking for someone to share your life with.

Dependant or Independent women

Do you want a dependant or independent woman?

This is a very important factor, because even is she is fiercely independent in her own country you must remember that when she comes to you she will be completely dependant on you for some time. She will not have any friends, no family and definitely no way at least for the beginning of making an income. Her dependence will have an effect on the relationship as now you have someone dependant on you for everything. You become her sole source of provision, her family, friends and her source of entertainment. Without you she can’t do much. This puts a burden on you and of course affects her. Remember she was used to going out and doing what ever she wanted. Now all that has changed and she will look to you for everything. Her situation can also be immensely frustrating for her. Now she has to wait for you to come home from work, entertain herself with not much in the way of people. She also does not have her own money and trust me, probably does not like to ask for money either. This can make her feel trapped as how does she get what she needs if she can’t ask for it.

If she is a dependant type person she will place even a greater demand on you, taking even longer to get it together in a strange land.

The answer to the above is to give her purpose for life, even you want purpose for life or you would not be on this road. So help her. Help her make friends, help her to get active that could be mind or body, get her something to do and that does not mean serving you, if she wants to serve you by all means but it should not be enforced by you. She needs purpose for her to keep her pride and in turn her mind, to stay sane.

Her purpose for life is something both my wife and I struggled with. I just wanted to provide for her, and as far as I was concerned she could sit at home all day long and do nothing (I have a maid). What a life I though. I could not have been more wrong.

I made the mistake of undermining her self worth. She has a brain and she wanted to use it, she has ambition and wanted to for fill it.

I am so glad that I took off my blinkers as she had a business idea even though I am very involved, I did not just say that’s nice and run with it, no. I involved her in our business and she is