The Light We Lost

Written by Jill Santopolo

Narrated by Jill Santopolo

*The International Bestseller and Reese Witherspoon’s Book Club pick!*

‘A one-sitting kind of book. Fans of One Day by David Nicholls will love this.’ Stylist Magazine

‘Santopolo is a true master of matters of the heart.’ Taylor Jenkins Reid

He was the first person to inspire her, to move her, to truly understand her. Was he meant to be the last?

Lucy is faced with a devastating choice. But before she can make her decision, she must start her story – their story – at the very beginning…

Lucy and Gabe meet at University on a day that changes their lives – and the world – forever. As the city burns behind them, they kiss for the first time.

When they meet again a year later, it seems fated. What follows is a thirteen-year journey of dreams, desires, jealousies, betrayals, and, ultimately, of love.

Is it fate that brought them together? Is it choice that kept them apart? Their journey will take Lucy and Gabe worlds apart, but never out of each other's hearts.

This devastatingly romantic novel about the enduring power of love, with its shocking, unforgettable ending, is perfect for fans of One Day.

• Language: English
• Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
• Release date: May 9, 2017
• ISBN: 9780008224592

Jill Santopolo

Jill Santopolo, a children’s book editor, grew up in Hewlett, New York. She graduated from Columbia University and received a MFA from Vermont College. She is the author of two middle grade mysteries as well as the Sparkle Spa series and lives in New York City. You can visit her online at JillSantopolo.com.

Reviews for The Light We Lost

[Natalia Anais Lacayo Amador · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

What a beautiful book. I’m devastated by that ending but what a beautiful story, and characters.

[bogopea · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

It was worth reading for the ending. I thought it was a great story but I didn't like the way she told it, as if she were speaking to a person (former lover) in her head. I just found it annoying. The ending explains it all. It's about a woman who meets a guy in college on 9/11 in NYC. A few years later they meet again and begin a relationship til he decides he has to leave her for the world's trouble spots so he can take photos and show the world (formed by the 9/11 event). Her life collapses and then she meets another guy, marries, has kids and feels like her life is great. Over the years she and the former BF stay in touch, sometimes rarely and sometimes frequently. He always turns to her in times of deep distress. I liked all the characters, although I struggled a bit with liking/disliking the boyfriend.

[heatherlinc · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

I had high expectations for this novel but it didn't deliver the way I wanted it to. I didn't agree with some of the decisions Lucy made and I thought she put Gabe on too high a pedestal. While I liked the writing, I didn't like the characters that much except for Darren who was too good to Lucy. The ending was sad but I wasn't left sobbing as I had expected. Overall, "The Light We Lost" was a touching story about choices, decisions and forks in the road.

[hobbitprincess · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

Seriously. A girl falls in love with a guy who won't give up his dreams of being a big-shot journalist to have anything to do with her. Lucy eventually marries a wonderful man who will do anything for her, yet her pining away for Gabe harms the marriage, despite years of marriage and a child. It's more like Lucy is obsessed with Gabe, following him online, emailing him, and never letting him go. I especially did not like the ending, which I won't share here. If I could have slapped some sense into Lucy, I would have. The author glorifies this obsession and doesn't seem to indicate that there is a problem with it.

[kamgeb · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

It took me a while to get into this book. But the ending really flew by.

[teresaluneau · Rating: 1 out of 5 stars]

No. Just no.

[lorikboyd · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

A heart wrenching read about Lucy and Gabe who met on 9/11/01 in college. This traces their relationship over 14 years. A classic love story yet so timely. I would love to read a sequel to this.

Beautifully written, characters are so real. Situations current. Loved it!

[linyarai · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This is one of the saddest books I have ever read, it was heartbreaking from start to finish, but it was SO good. I loved the characters, I loved their relationships, and it felt so realistic; like I was experiencing it right there with them. This is one book that stays with you, and I'm going to miss it when it's gone.

[dknight0918 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Not the ending I was expecting.

[simplykelina · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

Do you ever really move on from your first true love? This is a love story following Lucy and her long love Gabe. They have gone their separate ways, and Lucy has moved on with her life. Or has she? Gabe seems to always be right there or in the back of her mind. This does deal with love, loss, and infidelity. It deals with 9/11 and War (not too much, but mentions things going on around this time and does start off with 9/11) It was pretty slow for me, but I still found myself interested in the story. You can tell something is going to happen as Lucy is telling us this story from the past. I was waiting for the gut-wrenching moment, but it never happened. Was it sad? Yes. But, I was just let down. I never connected with the love story. Overall, this was only ok.

[oldblack-1 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I loved this book. I think it might be the best book I've read in 2018. It was one of those books I didn't want to end, so I read more slowly as the story continued. I loved it not for the overall plot and not because any of the characters was especially admirable (in fact, many reviewers don't like the book because they hate one or more of the characters), but because it described relationships in such realistic and perceptive ways. Sure, some of the plot elements were a little predictable - perhaps even could be described as 'romantic' - but I really wasn't at all focused on the plot. I kept reading to find out how the characters would deal with the complexities of relationships. It isn't what I would call romance, despite the dominance of the two intimate relationships, because the relationships are presented in very realistic ways. How do you choose a person to form a potentially life-long relationship? What compromise is worth making for an on-going relationship? How do you deal with a feeling of increasing distance in a marriage? How 'exclusive' should a marriage relationship be? ... is there room for some sort of third party connection without invoking crippling jealousy? Can you simply forget someone who shared some really important moments in your life? Is motherhood worthwhile? All these questions are asked, but mostly explored without answers, which is surely way preferable to the trite and simple alternative.

[dawnlovesbooks · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Lucy and Gabe met at college on September 11, 2001 and after they go through that horrific day together, they feel a strong connection to each other that develops into a long term relationship. Their relationship is strong, passionate, consuming, and indestructible until the day Gabe leaves to pursue his career. He is not the kind of person that can stay in one place and he has to go out into the world and pursue his dream of making a difference in the world by being a journalist/photographer. Through the rest of their lives they think of each other often and occasionally stay in contact. Lucy ends up marrying someone else but she is always haunted by the love she had for Gabe and what she lost. Gabe will always be the one great love of her life. The story really portrays how you never forget your first love and how there are so many different kinds of love in the world and how sometimes in life, no matter how much you love someone, it just doesn’t work out. “Some relationships feel like a wildfire-they're powerful and compelling and majestic and dangerous and have the capability to burn you before you even realize you've been consumed.....some relationships feel like a hearth fire-they're solid and stable and cozy and nourishing.” “I hope you find a love like that–one that is all-consuming and powerful that makes you feel like you're going slightly mad. And if you do find that love, embrace it. Hold onto it. When you give yourself over to love like that, your heart will get bruised. It will get battered. But you will also feel invincible and infinite.”

[sroot_12 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

While I didn’t want to abandon this book, the reality is I just didn’t connect with or care about any of the characters. Which may have been for the best as, if I had, I really would have hated the ending. ;)

[.l.p · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Beautifully and achingly poignant, The Light We Lost is a raw and emotional tale about imperfect Lucy and Gabe and their imperfect love, spanning many years and various life events. Narrated through the eyes of Lucy, she appears to be having an intimate and introspective dialogue with Gabe and herself. The author Jill Santopolo tenderly captures Lucy’s love, longing and inner struggles. As the story unfolds you know that the author is building towards a significant and momentous event between Lucy and Gabe’s lives, making it difficult to tear yourself away and put the book down.Though Lucy and Gabe’s love story began at a controversial period in history and despite their flaws, I found their complicated relationship believable and their characters relatable unlike other reviewers. Love and intimate emotions can spring up at the least likely times and terrifying and heart-wrenching events can bring people closer, seeking solace in each other. A part of me wishes the story continued for a few more chapters but ultimately I was satisfied with where it ended. Life is short and you only have one life to live, make the most of it, leave a positive impact and be true to yourself and others. So many powerful messages to take away from The Light We Lost.

[amaliagavea · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

‘’The world felt like it was cracking in pieces, like we’d gone through a shattered mirror into the fractured place inside, where nothing made sense, where our shields were down, our walls broken. In that place, there wasn't any reason to say no.’’ This book was quite a departure from what I usually choose to read. It was all in the cover, to be honest. I saw the lovely couple’s silhouettes and I said ‘’yeah, okay. Bye!’’ Because romance, people. Not my style at all. But, then my brain processed the New York scenery in the blue background and the title that sounded bittersweet, sad and I said to myself I would pretend this wasn’t a romance, but good old Contemporary Fiction. And I was right, thankfully. Yes, at the heart of the story lies the love and unbreakable bond between two people, but it was more complex than that. Family, choices, priorities, worries over an uncertain future are issues that are very prominent in this book, and reading it was a delight. And I confess, there were two-three times when I was really moved. And a little pissed-off at the characters’ choices…Many have claimed there’s no plot in this book. I disagree. Not every novel can have mind-blowing moments, twists and turns. What about a story that touches upon daily, universal subjects and has a quiet beauty and characters one could actually meet in actual life? Sometimes, these are elements that are enough to satisfy a reader.So, we follow Lucy and Gabe’s relationship through the years, starting in that nightmarish day of 2001 when terror struck New York and the world changed forever. Lucy and Gabe make some bad choices and their lives turn quite differently that they had planned. Still, the love they share is strong and so beautifully written that you cannot help feeling both touched and concerned over what the future has in store for them.Do I believe in love at first sight? Definitely. I guarantee you it exists, and I am the least romantic person you’ll ever find. In this novel, we witness a kind of love that starts as an obsession (and we all know how that feels when we are 20 years old) and becomes so strong that haunts the characters’ lives and the lives of those who struggle to approach them. Now, such a bond is unique, almost rare and it must be hard for a writer to communicate it to the reader without resorting to clichés. Jill Santopolo succeeds in creating a kind of language that is both contemporary and beautiful, lyrical and raw where needed. As we witness life unfolding through Lucy’s eyes, we are given a sense of her longing for Gabe, remembering their life together, and the way this pining is depicted is powerful, sincere, realistic, devoid of any drama.I really, really liked Lucy. She has the strength to admit her own faults and stands for her choices, she has her head screwed together and her doubts are understandable. She isn’t in the least bit selfish, to the point when I know I would have chosen differently. (But this is my personal opinion…)Gabe is complementing her perfectly, although they are two very different personalities. He had the power to make me really angry at times (often…) I mean, the guy was so wishy-washy and couldn’t see further than the end of his own nose. His choices can be a matter of endless debate, but he is so well-written that he makes us look upon him as if he is that troubled friend or relative who always gets on our nerves -especially at family gatherings- but you cannot help loving him and caring for him. However, Darren...Bliah!!! Yikes!! I do hate him and I cannot lie. You can find me a dozen reasons that are supposed to make me sympathise with him and I’d still want to punch him. The man is a human soup - I hate soup, sorry:) - and I hate him. Truly! The way he constantly doubts Lucy and tries to patronize her is outrageous…The theme in focus isn’t love, in my opinion, but choices and priorities. The great ‘’what ifs’’’ that shape our lives. What do we want from life when we find ourselves at a point where we need to sacrifice something we love for something we feel equally strongly about? Do we wait? Do we compromise? Do we wonder what could have gone differently? Of course, we do. And these questions do not refer only to romantic feelings, but to anything related to future plans and human relationships. You see? This book is far from a simple romance…I cannot recommend it enough. Read it for the descriptions of New York during terrifying times and times of prosperity and hope. Read it for a beautiful reference to a kind of love that is firmly rooted in the souls of two people. Read it to reflect or reminisce of the past. Perhaps a similar feeling once came your way. Read it because it is a very good book, not light, not heavy. Just realistic and attainable.……...and did I mention I hate Darren?

[karenvg3 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

There is nothing quite like your first true love. It sticks with you forever. This was a journey through Lucy’s life. The highs and lows, and the decisions that change her life’s path. The tears were real in this one. It was told in a unique fashion and I loved it. 4🌟

[haymaai · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

‘The Light We Lost’ is the February book selection for Reese Witherspoon’s book club, and since she gives it raving reviews, I was anxious to read it. The story is situated in New York City during the time of the destruction of the twin towers. That eventful day capitulated a desire for Lucy and Gabe, two seniors at Columbia University, to make their lives matter and to become a positive influence in the world. Gabe decides to pursue a career as a photojournalist, a job that takes him to all the remote regions of the world, leaving Lucy behind to mend her broken heart. Time passes, and Lucy eventually meets Darren, who is completely unlike Gabe, her first love. Darren is a planner and takes pleasure in surprising Lucy, while Gabe would be attractive in other ways. Lucy and Gabe’s romantic feelings for each other traverse time and are held in check, but never completely diminish. Throughout the story, I was a bit put-off by Gabe and Lucy because they seemed to behave like two love-lost teenagers who had little or no regard for their responsibilities and commitment to others. The ending seemed predictable to me, and although it was a tearful one, I could see it coming as the only adequate resolution to the story. This novel is written in the second person, which is an interesting point of view. Lucy is addressing Gabe throughout most of the text, and sometimes that point of view presents some confusion in following the storyline. Overall, the novel is engaging and an entertaining romance, albeit somewhat predictable.

[mhanover10 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

When I first started reading this book, I wasn't sure if I was going to like it. I didn't like the way Lucy was telling Gabe about their relationship. It felt weird to me. But then I got used to it and was pulled into Lucy's life. She and Gabe meet in college and it seems like their love is meant to last forever. But Gabe is unfulfilled. He wants to head to the Middle East and do more with his photography. Lucy loves her job and loves Gabe so how can she hold him back and possibly make him resent her. So he goes and they move on in their separate lives. But things keep pulling them back together. I think there is a kind of love where you can completely love someone but want them to succeed at the thing they love because if you don't have passion in your work, you don't have happiness in your life. So sometimes you have to sacrifice. I liked Lucy's husband Darren but there were points when I wanted to smack him. I LOVED their daughter Violet. This book made me smile but it also made me cry and it broke my heart in so many different ways. This was such a good book. If you are thinking about reading this, pick up because you won't be disappointed.

I received an advanced copy from Penguin Random House's First to Read program.

[kimpiddington · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Kept me turning the pages. Writing style felt intiment-like I was right there. Heartbreaking ending.

[nyiper · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This was fascinating--well written enough for me to keep reading page after page but I was sort of overwhelmed with the divisions in Lucy's head. There almost seemed to be continuing excuses for being so divided between two loves but at the end I really wondered what WOULD happen next? How could where she was at the end be explained in the near and distant future?

[wagner5sarah35 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Wow, I don't really know what I was expecting out of this book, but it definitely exceeded expectations. Lucy and Gabe meet on the fateful day of September 11, 2001, and they are both deeply affected by the fall of the twin towers. As the years pass and they pursue their divergent careers, they have a brief relationship that neither truly recovers from, despite engagements, marriage, and children with others. This book is short, offers little resolution, but is deeply thoughtful about the way we live our lives and how relationships work.

[teeth_1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

This was a beautiful but sad romantic love story. It was about first loves and the choices we make in our lives and how they come back to haunt us long after those choices have been made. The story of Gabe and Lucy's love is told over increments of time from Lucy's perspective. They first meet on Sept. 11th 200 and we're able to find comfort from one another during this tragic event. This event had a big impact on both of them. Lucy and Gabe's connection was intense and each found it hard to let that connection go even though their lives took different paths. Jill Santopolo told a beautifully romantic but sad love story. I would definitely read another book from this author. Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC of this novel in exchange for an honest review.

[nbmars · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

The dedication for this book reads “For New York City” and in fact, September 11, 2001 is a seminal moment in the story, and a turning point in the life of the main protagonist, Lucy. Lucy narrates this book in the form of a letter to Gabe, whom she met 13 years earlier at Columbia University in New York on 9/11; she was 21.Gabe was an aspiring photographer, and Lucy admired that about him; that he knew how to find beauty everywhere and in everything. “You notice things other people don’t.”At that time, Lucy didn’t know what she wanted to do yet; she was trying to figure out for herself the answer to the question “What makes a life well spent?” She told Gabe:“I think it might have something to do with making a mark - in a positive way. Leaving the world a little bit better than it was when you found it.”And on that day, 9/11, given what happened, she vowed to herself that she would live her life in a way that would give back.Gabe felt that way too.Gabe and Lucy eventually got into a relationship; Gabe was the first man who ever said “I love you” to Lucy. They were together fourteen months, living together for five of them, and for Lucy, they were life-changing. She told him, “I’ve never felt as alive as I did those five months we lived together.”Lucy liked to think of the two of them as “a binary star,” orbiting around each other.But Gabe had demons from his childhood that controlled his choices, and battling them took precedence over everything else in his life. He also felt he couldn’t just sit back and not try to contribute, by way of the candid images he captured, to an increase in compassion and caring in the world. Without consulting Lucy, he decided to take a job with the AP, going to war-torn countries and documenting what was happening to civilians.In addition, Gabe thought that there was some sort of karma operating in the world by which people only get a finite amount of happiness, so that the joy he felt with Lucy had to be balanced somehow with suffering and sacrifice. Lucy didn’t agree, but she never could convince Gabe. So Gabe left, and he and Lucy went their separate ways, at least physically. They each met others, and Lucy even got married to Darren - steady and reliable, who metaphorically provided her with a “hearth fire” instead of a “wildfire” as when she was in a relationship with Gabe. Darren “wasn’t dark and complicated - being with him was fun and easy,” even if sometimes less than exciting.But Lucy missed how Gabe saw her, understanding her without wanting to change her. In her letter she says to Gabe: “You wanted me because of. Darren wanted me in spite of.”Still, she had responsibilities, including, eventually, children. She would never have changed having had her children even if it meant never again feeling “infinite and invincible” as she did with Gabe. Nevertheless, Lucy and Gabe remained connected in many ways. So what happened to them and why is Lucy writing this letter in which she confesses so much? We don’t find out until nearly the very end.Discussion: I felt Lucy was drawn better than the male characters, who seemed much more cardboard-like. We only get small glimpses of them, reflected by Lucy’s complaints or occasionally praise. Darren was a bit chauvinistic and controlling, more committed to Lucy as (ironically) a cardboard construct than to the person she really was. Gabe was passionately engaged with life and with Lucy, but so emotionally conflicted it disabled him. As a reader, however, I never felt like I “knew” either of them, nor did I fully understand them. As for Lucy, she complained about Gabe being too much about Gabe, but she was pretty much all about Lucy, and neither of the two of them - not just Gabe, as Lucy charged - were good at communicating their wants and needs.Evaluation: While I liked the story a lot and it was very affecting, I thought some aspects of the plot and characters were a little under-developed and/or too ambiguous. On the other hand, a book club might have good discussions about this book for those very reasons.

[susan0316 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I enjoyed this book of love and loss but I think I would have enjoyed it more if I was younger. The main character's flair for drama really kind of bothered me throughout the book - actually I didn't like her much. Overall though it is an interesting and well written book and I read it until the end. The author's way of writing - like Lucy was writing in a journal - took me a little time to get used to but now that I've read the entire book, I think that it was the perfect way to tell the story.Lucy and Gabe met at college in NYC on 9/11 and could see the smoke and the dust in the city from their dorms. They developed an immediate lust (for lack of a better word) for each other and even though they quit seeing each other soon after, Lucy's memories of Gabe stayed strong. They met again in the city after they had both graduated and had a passionate love affair until Gabe left to go the Middle East as an embedded correspondent. Even as she continued to live her life without him, Gabe was never far from Lucy's mind. How she deals with his memory and goes on with her life is the basis of this book.Pure and simple, this is a love story about two people who can't forget each other no matter where life takes them. It was well written and an enjoyable read.

[susan.h.schofield · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

3.5 stars - I rounded up for a good debut. This is a quick and easy read - it will make a great summer beach read. Lucy is telling the story starting from when she met Gabe on Sept. 11, 2001 to where they are today. It is a story about what it means to love someone and the different kinds of love you have for different people. A little predictable at times and I would have liked a better conclusion. Fans of books like Me Before You and novels in that vein will like this book. I received an ARC from First to Read.