This Is How Your Marriage Ends: A Hopeful Approach to Saving Relationships

Written by Matthew Fray

Narrated by Rob Shapiro

A thoughtful, down-to-earth, contemporary guide to help partners identify and address relationship-killing behavior patterns in their own lives.

Good people can be bad at relationships.

 One night during his divorce, after one too many vodkas and a call with a phone-in-therapist who told him to “journal his feelings,” Matthew Fray started a blog. He needed to figure out how his ex-wife went from the eighteen-year-old college freshman who adored him to the angry woman who thought he was an asshole and left him. As he pieced together the story of his marriage and its end, Matthew began to realize a hard truth: even though he was a decent guy, he was a bad husband. 

 As he shared raw, uncomfortable, and darkly humorous first-person stories about the lessons he’d learned from his failed marriage, a peculiar thing happened. Matthew started to gain a following. In January 2016 a post he wrote—“She Divorced Me Because I left the Dishes by the Sink”—went viral and was read over four million times.

Filtered through the lens of his own surprising, life-changing experience and his years counseling couples, This Is How Your Marriage Ends exposes the root problem of so many relationships that go wrong. We simply haven’t been taught any of the necessary skills, Matthew explains. In fact, it is sometimes the assumption that we are acting on good intentions that causes us to alienate our partners and foment mistrust.

With the humorous, entertaining, and counterintuitive approach of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, and the practical insights of The 5 Love Languages, This is How Your Marriage Ends helps readers identify relationship-killing behavior patterns in their own lives, and offers solutions to break free from the cycles of dysfunction and destruction. It is must-read for every partner no matter what stage–beginning, middle, or even end—of your relationship.

• Language: English
• Publisher: HarperAudio
• Release date: Mar 22, 2022
• ISBN: 9780063072282

Matthew Fray

MATTHEW FRAY is a relationship coach, writer, and "the man who coaches husbands on how to avoid divorce" (New York Times). His writing has been featured in HuffPost, The Sunday Times, the New York Times, and many more. His blog Must Be This Tall To Ride has a dedicated following and has reached millions of readers.

Reviews for This Is How Your Marriage Ends

[katrina lastowski · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This was such an eye opening book. I think it is perfect for men and women. It is to the point with no fluff or candy coating. Thank you for such an amazing read.

[Tara Hansen · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I think every couple should read this! It explains a lot. You can be a good person but a bad spouse.

[christine.lund.molfese · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

An extremely insightful read from a truly honest perspective. The writer has come to know himself thoroughly through his extremely painful, regrettable divorce.

[Coach J. Chromiak · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This book came to me at a perfect time... Opening with "I was 34 and crying more than a grown man should, my wife just left me " I am in the exact same position. 34 & all. This read gave me the hope to be optimistic and change for real to win my wife back and make her my priority. I will do it, if she allows me. I can't recommend this book enough, it was written to every one of us! Thank you.

[Mohammed · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Nice book explaining the wrong approach. I loved it .