The Chemistry of Love

By Howard Mupango

Without full control of your love affairs (dating and marriage), you officially have nothing. It doesn't matter what else you do!

All of the time we invested in someone, the hopes, the dreams, and most noticeably the real you…gone!

 

Do you want to become a 'gangster', rock solid, and bolts and nuts in the game of love? Well, I'm glad you are here. Chances are, love dilemmas you are facing at the moment and those you will be facing are covered here.

 

All love affairs and marriages start with a very poor grasp of the love web, and it often never gets better. We waste so much time working on all other aspects of love intricacies, we seem to solve love problems, then wonder why we never got to where we wanted to be in our love affairs and marriages.

 

Bad love advice, partner choices, and relationship beliefs were the reasons. They always were. Without brutal truth, nothing else works the way it's supposed to.

Unlike most material you were told and found somewhere, which is usually nothing more than high and vague tips, this book breaks down the intricacies of love itself to its core, explaining why most people get in their way so much more often in the world of love and marriage. It breaks down why love affairs/marriages fail, why you felt played, why there is no peace in your relationship(s), and why no matter how much you pray you never got nor will get the good partner you deserve. The book tells you what you can do about it.

 

This book applies to people both on the market, off the market and divorcees. It suits both genders. Why? Because relationship choices are vital to every human being's success in life. Many people are worried about why, what happened (will happen), and how can I choose a better partner and this book answer all that.

 

Here is everything you will get

-An explanation on why love is one thing that could either wreck or make up your life, whether you are poor, middle class or rich.

-The "elimination method". No need to eat up your mind on failed relationships, or "to-be relationships", this is primarily about what we can simply look up at and ignore/move on or make up. It's all much easier than you think.

-The things you can do right now, to instantly solve your love problems and keep on applying the same.

-In this complex world of personalities, how to scan for the best partner

-How to let go of a bad relationship/marriage and live okay forever.

 

    One single chapter in this book can be the difference between a horrible love situation that constantly plagues you and ruins your love life, and turning it all around so you can put all of that lost effort and invested time right back into getting the best partner again. What's that worth?

 

The book was also written to be an entertaining and very easy read. This is a welcome change in the relationship's category, I think you will agree.

I do hope it serves you well and has life-changing effects on the way you choose and stays with your partner. I'm glad that you are wise enough to try and fix the one thing that takes down many people's lives…almost nobody does that. You deserve good love life, it's your right, and nobody has to give you fake love. This is a love compass and binoculars that I'm handing you, enjoy!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Howard Mupango
• Release date: Apr 15, 2023
• ISBN: 9798215152898

Howard Mupango

Howard Mupango is an author and a digital entrepreneur. facebook@ howard mupango twitter @howardmpango instagram @ipanosh_c whatsapp [phone]

Book preview

INTRODUCTION

It catches my attention always that why is this couple happy and the next couple is fighting day and night. The flummoxing part is that despite how good a person looks, his/her love relations are not immune to heartbreaks and separations. It worries me when a person is struggling to find a good date/marriage, while the next person has never struggled. I’ve observed that couples would truly love one another before marriage or a few months after they have started dating. After a few months or years, the relationship won’t have that affection while the next couple has been happy from day one till they get old.

I have discovered (online), that some people around the world have negative assumptions about love due to their current and past experiences. Others have tried avoiding it, and envy those in real love, but I wonder why fight against love since it’s the reason behind this world’s existence. They speak badly of what marriage is about, they forget this world had been created out of love, what’s keeping it going forward is love, and the whole world is transpiring because of love.

I have looked deeper into the core issues at play, they go beyond how you look only. The reasons stretch far back to the fundamentals of human beings in collaboration with today’s world. To understand your date/partner, your looks, job, and your accent are the last things you should count on. You are doomed in your relationship if you only believe what your partner says and does.

The core concepts and the real person’s motives in a relationship are heard and seen by listening and observing the incomplete statements. These statements are both verbal and non-verbal. It is one of the abilities that I’m going to hand you in the coming chapters inside the book. When you have this ability, it doesn’t matter how good your partner acts or says, you’ll always protect yourself without being blinded by the sweet-for-nothing goodies.

To grasp the core concepts of love, we have to look at things that seem unconnected to love and relationships. They may seem unimportant to look at, but they are embedded in every person’s conscience. They unconsciously drive every person’s desires, dreams, statements, promises, etc. We can both agree that in today’s world, it seems so much easier to survive due to technology and the vast developments since the stone age. Simultaneously, the developments have changed other facets of human lives, particularly dating and marriage.

In today’s life, it’s easy to fall in love, hard to get married, and harder to be happy in marriage. This global village has clothed us with pseudo-personalities, these personalities make it harder to find the best partner in relationships. The difficulties in relationships caused by pseudo-personalities lead to wide differences in beliefs. The differences in beliefs and other perceptions have made love life a battle zone that always winds up in a blood bath.

Surprisingly, the differences were initially at a global level, but they have now embedded human lives at the societal levels and home levels. People in the same city have different beliefs and perceptions. Family members raised by the same parents and living in the same house wind up so different. This is scary!

Family members no longer agree on many things because today we don’t have the same culture and constant one. Besides the influence of the internet, the media, and other factors, population growth has caused many differences in beliefs. The more people in a particular environment of this planet causes many differences in life experiences within that group of people. Differences in life experiences trigger rapid behaviour changes. When behaviour changes, culture changes and so do beliefs. When beliefs change, there will be always psychological, verbal and emotional war, and pain among groups of people whether at individual level, national, and global levels.

When these wars spark and affect individuals at any level, humans can collectively try to sort out the differences through various ways. That’s when we witness the rise of physical, economic, and cyber wars at national or global level. At national or global levels, humans act collectively to form organisations like WHO, UN, IMF, or Governments. When these wars (caused by differences in beliefs because of human behaviour complexities), affect societies at an individual level, none or little can be done.

When little is done at individual levels, we witness the formation of legal and illegal groups. Some of the legal entities include the judicial institutions that aim to sort out differences between married couples, theft, and different assaults. Other organs can be employees trade unions, business organizations, church organizations, political groups, non-governmental organizations, etc.

Because at this level, (individual), little is done, we also wind up witnessing illegal groups like mafias, militias, rebels, terrorists, etc. consequences are murder, thefts, robberies, prostitution, protests, social unrest, etc.

Have you noticed what all these groups have in common? Beliefs. Each group, whether at the societal, national or international level, shares the same behaviour and beliefs. Most of the time, their behaviour and belief changes have spiraled due to population growth. These population changes led to differences in life experiences.

The problem is that protecting yourself at an individual level requires a lot. It doesn’t count if you are jointly protected, you will be going to get attacked and hurt. You might fail in some categories but I would not want you to fail in the category of love and marriage. These differences in personalities and beliefs affect every individual in romantic relationships.

As I said earlier, humanity has tried to set up organizations like marital courts where marriage chapters were formed to keep you safe. That doesn’t guarantee your safety because this type of war is intangible. That is why I wrote this work, to protect yourself from the invisible dilemma, a predicament that even at a collective level, can’t save you, you have to save yourself!

The most astonishing part is that out of the differences this humanity has, almost all of them can be sorted out by jointly forming the previously named illegal and legal groups. Out of all human differences in beliefs, there is one category that can’t be collectively solved. Dating, romantic relationships, and marriage! In this category, no matter how many you are or what type of groups you form, you are never safe, you can’t be protected. This category needs you alone to win. You might invite family and friends, take your partner to court, and make your partner wears a marital ring day and night but you won’t win.

Cooperative organizations or groups (family, friends, counselling, courts, etc) don’t win when they try to sort out a relationship messy because almost everybody sees it from the same angle, and uses the same old tactics. From advice on how to get a good partner, to recover from heartbreak and divorce, all their ideas are terribly bad.

What makes the marriage game elusive to win isn’t because it’s invisible, no. It’s because it doesn’t require the same old strategies, the ways and tactics have to be reformed again and again at a faster pace. And normally, the strategy to win in this category is to go against what many societies consider unspeakable and defiant. Unlike other wars and differences, humans can use the same old maneuvers to win the differences.

I would like you to know that the intricacies of beliefs can only be satisfied between individuals, nations, or at a global scale when there are common interests at stake. When believed common interests are no longer in play, the parties (all participants at whatever level) would withdraw from whatever agreement made before. Only individuals with beliefs in harmony could carry on with whatever had been agreed before.

This is one of the rules that will be fully explained in the chapters so that you keep a burning affair with your partner. It’s all about keeping the same interests with your partner, interests change but there is a way to keep upgrading your interests tallying with your partner.

The process of finding a good partner, being in good terms with your lover is easy only if you know the recipe of human beliefs and perceptions. When changing process takes place, a new race emerges, the hybrid, or the mixed species. These people experience all facets of life at different levels in a short period of time or in one life span. That’s when a person experiences a poor, middle, and rich life style in a life span. Even if the person doesn’t actually go through these phases in person, he or she sees it, witnesses it, and due to the modelling learning style of human behaviour, he/she is likely to become that person.

These types of people are capable of doing anything, they have basic academic education, they know how it feels to leave a simultaneous life. They are hard to predict and they can change behaviours at any moment. They can do the unexpected and they are more driven by external environments. Driven by external environments is caused by having mixed beliefs, different life experiences from mixed life styles.

People in this category (almost everybody today) have no certain behaviours. Having uncertainty behaviours means your beliefs are not bound to a single entity that makes a person not easy to predict her or his motives. That’s why we are having problems in romantic and marital relationships. A person with a defined belief, and one lifestyle is likely to keep his or her promises.

Because of these human complexities, humanity is at a greater advantage at some things and very high risk at other things like love, relationships, and marriages because you can’t know why, who, and how is this person going to keep the promises. The scariest thing is that mixed beliefs and cultures make a person susceptible to the environment. What he or she does vacillate at any moment, it changes so often. That’s when you might have a burning affair/marriage and down the line, you will be