A Healthy Relationship Perspective: Build the Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime

By Nate Imoniruwe

Making a relationship connection occurs daily. It is a universal phenomenon that is part of the human experience, and it happens to people of all ethnicities and backgrounds. Nonetheless, not all relationships are founded on a healthy perspective. The greatest threat to relationship or marital longevity is not the lack of love, but the lack of a healthy relationship perspective. Your mindset will determine your approach to a relationship and will regulate its success or failure.

Finding true love remains a dream most people hope to experience someday. Being in a love relationship is easy, especially in the beginning. The challenge is finding the right person who fits perfectly in your life and understands you. This challenge facing many relationships can be overcome starting with a change of one’s perspective about relationships on personal level.

Nate Imoniruwe provides practical wisdom and insight, coupled with experiential and biblical principles to help you understand how to build a meaningful and healthy relationship. He also helps guide you down the right relationship path with purpose and proper perspective in mind.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Dec 20, 2020
• ISBN: 9781664144101

Book preview

Copyright © 2020 by Nate Imoniruwe.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Rev. date: 12/18/2020

Xlibris

844-714-8691

www.Xlibris.com

537476

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REVIEWS

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A Healthy Relationship Perspective by Nate Imoniruwe is unlike any other book on this subject I have read. I have thoroughly and sufficiently enjoyed this book. Upon reading this book you will gain an appreciation for what it takes to find the right person and staying with that person till death do you part. Nate uses both practical wisdom coupled with experiential and biblical understanding served in a clear, engaging writing style that can help anyone identify the idols in their hearts and replace them with the Heart of God.

As a pastor, I am constantly searching for tools and resources that can help shorten the leap of faith for couples on whatever relationship spectrum they find themselves. And this book does an incredible job of aiding the reader understand and compartmentalize the information into very real actionable steps.

- Dr. George E. Wilson

The subjects of marriage, romance, relationships, values, love and companionship are always exciting and very captivating to most people, and finding the right resources that can help provide guidance on these areas of life can pose a huge challenge.

The academic process prepares individuals to be part of the workforce and to help provide people the knowledge and skills that can afford them the opportunity to earn more money (when such opportunity presents itself) than they would have otherwise, but it fails to prepare individuals for some of the important parts of life such as how to achieve financial freedom or how to have a successful marriage.

It is my opinion that A Healthy Relationship Perspective is a one-stop-shop kind of resource that delivers the goods and definitely a must-read for anyone desiring to be a spouse someday and enjoy a life-long marriage relationship.

It will help any individual develop a healthy perspective on marriage and healthy expectations about marriage. The manner in which Nate presents ideas and concept is so engaging and refreshing. It is packed with nuggets and ideas that can help enrich any healthy relationship, no matter what stage and condition it is in.

Topics like how to know you have a good man/woman, developing your communication skills from your relationship with your mother are just two amongst dozens that this book discusses and provides lots of insight on.

I honestly recommend this book to everyone – from teenagers to those that have been married with decades under their belt. Good stuff!

- Excel Imo

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DEDICATION

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I dedicate this book to my children, Julian, Naomi, Jeremiah, and Nyla: May you grow up to find true love that will last a lifetime.

I also dedicate this book to all my readers around the world. I hope this book helps to increase wisdom and enlighten your understanding to build and maintain a long-lasting relationship.

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APPRECIATION

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My special thanks go to the following people in my life:

To my mother, Rose Imoniruwe for being an example among many others who lived to honor your marriage vows, Till death do us part. In her, I saw strength, hope, positive compromise, and patience demonstrated growing up as a boy even into manhood. Again, thank you!

Thanks! To all the couples around the world who through their commitment to marriage encouraged me to write this book, I am very grateful.

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CONTENTS

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Introduction

Chapter 1     The Big Misconception

Contrast

Vision For Your Relationship

Self-Evaluation Before Dating

Self-Evaluation Overview

Chapter 2     Finding The Right Partner

Chapter 3     Learning Your Partner While Dating

Sharing Past Relationships

Get To Know The Parents

Agree To Counseling

Needless Competition

Chapter 4     The Mask Of Deception

Chapter 5     The Nature Of Women

Compassion

Sensitivity

Emotional Balance

Communication

Trust

Chapter 6     The Nature Of Men

Confidence

Admiration

Leisure

Verbal Control

The Why And What

Chapter 7     First Thing First

Chapter 8     Love Or Infatuation?

Infatuation

Love

Chapter 9     The Intent Of Marriage

Reasons For Marriage

Chapter 10   How To Transform Your Relationship

Chapter 11   Ways To Transform Your Relationship

Chapter 12   It Does Not Matter

Chapter 13   Sex Harmony

Chapter 14   Discuss Sex Before Marriage

Chapter 15   True Love

Overview Of True Love

Chapter 16   Relationship Caution

Emotional Hangover

Self Centered Individuals

Financially Irresponsible Individuals

Obsessive And Controlling Individuals

Chapter 17   Fighting Fair

Preventing Full-Blown Argument

Chapter 18   Keys To A Long Lasting Relationship

Chapter 19   Relationship Boundaries

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INTRODUCTION

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Your mindset will set the atmosphere for your relationship. The maturity or immaturity of your mind is like a thermostat that will regulate the temperature of the relationship. Your mindset will either create unbearable living conditions for both of you or a nice warm, loving, and enjoyable environment. Your desire to have a fun-filled marriage without the thought of divorce ever coming up is determined by how you think and knowing what you want. A relationship is one of the most treasured human experiences known to man which has turned dreadful over many centuries due to the lack of human understanding.

No one ever dreamt of having a tragic relationship or failed marriage. Instead, every one envisions having the best marriage possible. It is heartbreaking when one discovers that your spouse of many years wants out of the marriage he or she swore never to abandon. It is important to understand that relationships crumble and marriages fail for many reasons, and one of those reasons is taking the wrong approach towards the relationship. Your approach to a relationship is foundational and must be met with the right perspective or else you will create an unwanted end-result. Just in case you do not know, one can take the wrong approach and attitude towards relationship and with that, you influence your marriage negatively.

No one should rush carelessly into marriage just because they admire it from the outside. Many are ignorant of what it takes to keep the bond of love in a relationship burning for a lifetime. There is a level of maturity and psychology required. Your maturity level, which involves your reasoning, perspective, and again, approach, plays a huge role in the success of any relationship leading to marriage. That means being mature may require simplicity of heart. Because it allows transparency, honesty and creates room for mistakes to be made without judging each other every time.

Maturity can equip you to exercise patience, gentleness, understanding, and especially forgiveness. Maturity promotes open-mindedness to listening and taking counsel to heart. Your approach to a relationship is a product of your mindset. Having the wrong mindset is one of the greatest threats that have wrecked many marriages and relationships. What does that mean? Your current way of thinking determines everything that is either happening or will happen in your relationship. Think about this next question for a moment. Do you know that your way of thinking will determine your actions, reactions, and constraints? Your mindset defines you, what you say and do. There is a frame of mind required before you get into a relationship.

Men and women have so many similarities in their nature, yet they are so different from one another in so many ways. Men and women both possess unique natures that were inherent in them from the beginning of time. It will do you well to understand the similarities and differences. If your knowledge of the opposite sex is shallow, it may likely limit how you relate to or treat your future mate.

Having the right knowledge about the opposite sex and the purpose of relationships enhances your ability to comprehend the dynamics that will translate to having a better connection with your future mate. It is your understanding that will make a difference in your relationship. Imagine a woman who has hidden her heart away from men due to a painful past. What if this woman has never experienced true love before from either her family or a previous relationship? Expecting her to suddenly offer affection on certain levels would be an unreasonable expectation. Especially if the man in her life is fully aware of her past.

In such an instance, knowledge will produce understanding and understanding will produce patience, which would also regulate ones’ level of expectation of her. In other words, because of the maturity in understanding her painful past, it will allow room for her to grow rather than trying to force out of her what is not readily available. Invest quality time to understand your mate so that your relationship can flourish. Time is the most valuable commodity you have in life and how you use time while in a relationship will determine the results that will emanate.

It is vital to know that relationship success may emerge from witnessing the success or even the failure of others’ relationships around you. Some say that one can only receive wisdom from those who have had a successful marriage is not altogether true. Relationships and marriage are not a one size fits all. Some things that can help one relationship can make others easily fall apart very quickly or slowly over time. There are failed marriages all around us every day, we must learn the lessons from those failures and avoid following those paths that will also lead to a failed marriage.

Things can go wrong in a relationship, but just because you are in a phase where things seem shaky does not mean the relationship is over. It does not take a failed relationship to learn from mistakes. Some lessons can be right in front of you if you are willing to take the blinders off, open your eyes, and pay close attention to the details of your relationship.

Having a long-lasting marriage can be inspired by the vision you have of what outcome you want. Marriage success depends on your ability to recognize beforehand the necessary practices that are tailor-made to blossom your relationship. If you want to experience stability, peace, harmony, love,